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    Dirty Jokes

    Uploaded by

    Martin Lothar
    dirty jokes are here

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd

    Dirty Jokes

    Uploaded by

    Martin Lothar
    2K views12 pages
    dirty jokes are here

    Copyright

    © © All Rights Reserved

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    PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd

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    dirty jokes are here

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Download as pdf or txt
    2K views12 pages

    Dirty Jokes

    Uploaded by

    Martin Lothar
    dirty jokes are here

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Download as pdf or txt
    of 12
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    The document appears to be an excerpt from 'The Little Book of Dirty Jokes' which contains risqué jokes divided into categories of 'Dirty', 'Dirtier' and 'Dirtiest'. The introduction thanks friends who contributed jokes and the table of contents provides an outline of the book's content.

    Three men are marooned on an island and encounter a cannibal. To escape, they must measure up their combined penis lengths to the cannibal's. The third man only has 1 inch but claims to have had an erection, allowing them to meet the required length.

    A couple engages in oral sex in a field at night. After, the man says he wishes he had a torch, and the woman replies he's been 'eating grass' for ten minutes, unable to see in the dark.

    The Little Book of

    Dirty Jokes
    Ed Cobham

    SUMMERSDALE

    Copyright Summersdale Publishers Ltd 2002


    All rights reserved. No part of this book may be
    reproduced by any means, nor transmitted, nor
    translated into a machine language, without the written
    permission of the publisher.
    Summersdale Publishers Ltd
    46 West Street
    Chichester
    PO19 1RP UK
    www.summersdale.com
    ISBN 1 84024 259 0
    Printed and bound in the EU.
    Disclaimer
    The majority of these jokes are based on material that is
    freely available in the public domain. No information as to
    who wrote the original versions of these jokes was available.
    If anyone feels they have a valid claim to the copyright
    ownership of the roots of any joke contained herein, please
    contact the publishers with supporting evidence in order
    that credit may be given in any future edition.

    Thanks to
    all my mates who contributed their fave jokes to this
    nifty little book, making my job a lot easier. These are the
    people to whom I am particularly indebted and, naturally,
    owe a beer or two: Ash Gordon, Dr Mojo, Tam Howard,
    Nutmeg Charley, Bill McMunt, Wazzer, Jed, Pete, Johnno,
    Frankie, Steve, Ian, Posh Locks, Phat Twat, Hairy Kunt
    and Turnip. Youre a bunch of filthy fuckers and I love
    you for it.

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    DIRTY CONTENTS
    DIRTY
    DIRTIER
    DIRTIEST

    5
    50
    90

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    My husband came home


    with a tube of KY jelly and
    said, This will make you
    happy tonight. He was
    right. When he went out of
    the bedroom, I squirted it
    all over the doorknobs. He
    couldnt get back in.

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    Whats the difference


    between hard and light?
    You can sleep
    with a light on.

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    Oral sex makes your


    day; anal sex makes
    your hole weak.

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    Whats the difference


    between oral sex
    and anal sex?

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    hree men are marooned on an


    island desperately seeking a way
    to get off. A cannibal approaches
    them and flops his penis out. If the length
    of your three penises together is as big as
    mine, then Ill show you how to get off
    the island. Otherwise youll be killed and
    eaten. The natives nob was an incredible
    20 inches. Getting off to a good start, the
    first man shows off his impressive 10
    inches. The second man produces a 9-inch
    dick. Feeling confident, they urge the third
    man to get his tackle out. He does so and
    reveals just one inch of manhood. After
    some nail-biting calculations the cannibal
    says, Okay fellas, youve managed to come
    up with the goods: Ill let you use my boat
    to escape. As they were sailing to safety,

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    the first bloke mentions how lucky they are


    that hes so well endowed. Likewise, the
    second bloke suggests that they are truly
    blessed at the length of his schlong. The
    third guy pipes up and youre damn
    lucky I had an erection!

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    10

    Why do farts
    smell so bad?
    So the deaf can
    enjoy them too.

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    A couple was getting frisky


    in a field. After giving her
    oral sex he said, Wow, I
    wish I had a torch. So do
    I, she said. Youve been
    eating grass for the past
    ten minutes.

    11

    DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY * DIRTY

    THE LITTLE BOOK OF DIRTY JOKES

    guy was sitting in a bar when a


    stranger walked up to him and
    asked: If you woke up in the
    woods and scratched your arse and felt
    Vaseline, would you tell anyone? Of
    course not! the guy said. The stranger
    then asked: If you felt further into your
    crack and pulled out a used condom,
    would you tell anyone? Nope. Great,
    said the stranger. Fancy going camping
    then?!

    12

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