Good morning everyone. I am XXXXXXXX, the founder of Brainy Montessori.

It
gives me great pleasure to join you here today for our open day open day in this year. I
am so grateful to have such an honour standing here to give a talk on What Does It Take
to Be a Good Parent? In my speech, I am going to share with you some characteristics of
a good parent. I am sure all the parent here will agree with me that being parents is tough.
Bringing up children is a very difficult task. Everyone wishes to be good parents.
However, sometimes we could be so discouraged and helpless when we get the feedback
that we are not good parents although we have done our upmost to provide the best for
our children. What is the cause of that? Today, let us learn how to be good parents
together.
Parents define as a person who is a father or mother or a person who has a child.
Parents also define as to be or act as a mother or father to someone. Good in other hand,
having the required qualities, of a high standard, possessing or displaying moral virtue,
and also that which is morally right. Therefore for me, good parent is someone refer to
father or mother who loves their child unconditionally, communicates openly with their
children, is involved in their children lives as much as they can be, someone who is there
for them when they need someone, someone who teaches good morals and values,
someone who shows them right from wrong, strict but not too strict. Parenting is a
lifelong journey. As parents, we have an important responsibility. Every parent wants to
be a good parent and role model for our children. But to be a good parent is not easy. It is
a journey of trial and error, continuous learning and growing together with your child.
Parents should have good moral character, because they are the role models of
children. It has been known that children are the reflection of their parents character.
Practicing what you said is an effective method of parenting. Your child is constantly
watching you for action on how to behave. For instance, acting out in anger could teach
your child the wrong way to deal with his emotions. If you find yourself unable to control

your anger when your child has misbehaved, walk away for a minute. After you have
calmed down, you can react in a more composed manner. Other examples, my parents do
not smoke. They express good action in all their actions. They taught us how to respect to
elders, and be sensitive to other peoples feelings all the time. They have been my idol all
my life, because they were able to raised five children so well and none of us went astray.
Parents need to be active participants in the life of their child. Your child learns by
watching you, so be aware of what your do. Embrace your parenting job with enthusiasm,
compassion and a sense of humour. Take the time to know your childs personality and
parent your child based on his or his strengths and weaknesses, according to family
relationship expert, Dr. Gary Smalley. Spend time with each child individually. Try to
divide your time equally if you have more than one child. Listen and respect your child
and respect what they want to do with their life. Set aside a day to go to a park, theme
parks, museum or library depending on their interests. You can also attend school
functions, do homework with them and visit their teacher at open house to get a sense of
how they are doing in school. If your child is loyal, consistent and compliant because she
or he wants your approval, a disapproving look or soft word could rectify a misstep. A
gritty, take charge and independent child, however requires more discipline. It happen to
my child, he is a very independent boy at age 2, eat by himself, never cry when he walks
and fell, but very active in exploring new area and thing. Sometimes, I do not have
enough hands to handle him, so in this I have to be an active participant to discipline him.
Next characteristic to be a good parent that I want to share is the ability to
understand and share the feelings of another. A good parent knows how to listen, more
than talk. Sometimes, all a child needs is a listening ear, a place to talk things out, and for
the parent to put themselves in the childs shoes, instead of solve problems for him or his.
A parent will have better chance of hearing what their child is really saying if they willing
to tune into their child words, tone of voice, and body language. My son, still cannot
speak very clear at his age of 2. What I do is I try to understand and listen what he

Want to express to me in his own language. It is very challenging situation indeed, when
what I interpret from what he saying or trying to express is not same as what he really
means. Sometimes, it hurts when he cry if I do not understand what he was try to talk or
share. But I never give up, I try harder to understand what he want to tell me by spending
more time playing and talking empathically with his. Now, I am bit relief when I can
understand much better what he trying to say such as changing my favourite TV channel
to his favourite cartoon channel. Thus, empathic listening sets the stage for open
communication and can go a long way in enhancing the parent-child relationship.
Patience is another characteristic parent must have. Patience defines as the capacity
to accept or tolerate delay, problems, or suffering without becoming annoyed or anxious.
Although children behaviour gets out of hand sometimes due to certain issues like mood,
parents apply extra mile of patience to comfort them with love and care. You also must
control your temper as much as you can. It is important to try to be as calm and
reasonable as you can when you explain your rules or carry them out. This is too unsure
your children to take you seriously not fear you or think of you as unstable. Clearly, this
can be quite a challenge, especially when your children are acting out or just driving you
up the wall, but if your feel yourself getting ready to raise your voice, take a break and
excuse yourself before your finish talking to your children. Sometimes, we all lose our
tempers and feel out of control, it undeniable. You should apologize to your children,
letting them know that you have made a mistake, if you do or say something you regret.
If you act like the bad behaviour is normal, then they will try to mimic it. Therefore, you
should increase level of patience in yourself in order to be a good parent.
Praising your children is a vast part of being a good parent as well. This is to let
your kids feel proud of their achievements and good about themselves. They would not
feel empowered to be independent or adventurous if you do not give them the confidence
they need to be out in the world on their own. Whenever they do something good or reach
new achievement, let them know that you have noticed and proud of them. You can say
buy them a present, or cook their favourite meals. Try to praise your children at least

three times as much your give them negative feedback. Though it is important to tell your
children when they are doing something wrong, it is also important to help them build a
positive sense of self. If you have babies, who still young to fully understand, praise them
with treats, applause, and lots of love. With this, they will feel precious.
Each child has its own unique identity. To be a good parent, you have to avoid
comparing your children to others, especially among the siblings. Celebrate their
differences and instil in each child the desire to pursue their interests and dreams. Failure
to do so may give your child a belief that you are less worthy or important than other
people, an imagination that they can never be good enough in your eyes. If you want to
help them improve their attitude, talk about meeting their aim on their own way, instead
of telling them to act like their sister, cousins or friends. This will help them develop a
sense of self instead of having a belief that you are less worthy. Comparing one child to
another can also make one child develop a competing with his or his sibling. You have to
nurture a loving relationship between your children, not a competitive one. If they
arguing do not choose sides, be fair and natural. I believe, some of parents have their
favourite child. Please, from now on, you have to stop this favouritism. I want to share
with you about this, my mother used to have his favourite daughter, my oldest sister. He
cooks special meals for him every day and even gives him the best plate compare to us.
My mother is so lucky, we never ask or get jealous about it, however when some relatives
see it, and talk about it, he become to realize slowly. Now his favourite is not staying
anymore with her, the not favourite ones take care of her. When we all grown up now, we
sometimes like to recall about how much her put more attention on my oldest sister, she
will apologize to us, then we just giggles and love her even more.
Another major characteristic that good parents have is being a positive role model.
If you want your child to be in well manner, then you should model the behaviour and
character you hope your children will adopt and continue to live by the rules that you set.
A positive role model shows and presents a healthy lifestyle that involves exercise, nature
art and self-expression. They are wise in their words and actions. They strive to express

their wants in a positive manner. A positive role model are not afraid to say they made a
mistake and they are open to criticism on how they can do things better. They do not
blame others, nor do they show themselves as a victim. They teach the concept of
acceptance by using everything for their upliftment, advantages and growth. They
basically present the concept of cause and effect so the child can learn through its
experiences what is effective, and what is not effective. Since they know they are more
than just a mother or a father, they take time to nurture and care for themselves so they
can give from their overflow.
Children have a tendency to become what they see and hear unless they make a
deliberate and concerted effort to break the mole. You do not have to be a perfect person,
but you should strive to do as you want your children to do, so you do not look
sanctimonious if you tell your children to be polite to other when they find you getting in
a heated argument. It is perfectly okay to make mistakes, but you should apologize or let
your child know that the behaviour is not good. You can say something like, "ibu didn't
mean to yell at you. This is better than forgetting that you made a mistake, because that
will show the child that he or he should model this behaviour. Educate kids about chores
by setting a schedule and having them help you out. Do not tell your child to do
something, but ask for their help. The earlier they learn to help you, the longer they will
be willing to. If you want your children to learn to share, set a good example and share
your things with them.
Another characteristic to be a good parent is respect. Respect defines as a feeling of
deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or
achievements. Respect also means due regard for the feelings, wishes, or rights of others.
A good parent is respectful to their child, even when disciplining. Children first learn
respectful behaviours from their parents or guardians, so a child who is consistently
treated respectfully by parent is more likely to develop a good self-respect, and a respect
for others, including their parent. Parents should keep in mind that it is possible to be
respectful and resilient at the same time. Respect your children privacy as you would

Want them to respect yours, for example, if you teach your child that your room is out of
boundaries to them, respect the same with their room. Respect your childrens decision as
well is important. Let you children to choose anything they like, they want or desire. If
you go shopping cloth with them for instance, let them to choose and give relevant
opinion if necessary. By this, your children can see you respect what they really want or
choose. I believe some parents, if they have teenagers studying in college, they like to
choose the course on behalf of their children. You should avoid this behaviour and be
respectful to what your teenager chooses for studying. If you think their choice is wrong
or not suitable for them, talk and discuss with them. By discussing, they will tell you why
they choose the course instead of what you expect them to take. When your satisfy, please
respect their choose and this will make your child feels good and respected.
To conclude my speech today, I want to highlight again eight characteristics to be
good parents, which are good moral, active participant in your childrens life, understand
their children, patience, praising, avoid comparing, positive role model, and respect.
Good parent must have good moral values in themselves because children will tend to
mimic their traits. Good parent also must be an active participant in their childrens life
and activities. They also must have ability to understand and share feeling when talking
with their children and be patience in nurturing their children. A good parent also must
praise their children to make them feel proud and precious. Avoid comparison among
children or others is as well important to being a good parent. A good parent must show a
positive role model to their children because children tend to adapt what their parent
behaves. Last characteristic to be a good parent that I mentioned before is respect.
Respect is important characteristic in raising your children to show to them how much
you value their opinion and choice.
Finally, let me say that I am heartened to see so many fellow parents here today, as
it shows our interest and intent to be good parents, to do what is really helpful for our
children. Your children is precious gift from god to you, you should teach them and raise

them well as nothing in this world is equally same precious to your children. I hope all of
you understand and try so hard to become a good parent. Thank you.