Bent Mag-Oct 2008

Melissa Totten
Page 18
OCTOBER 2008 ISSUE 117
Publisher: Terry George

Editor: Gordon Hopps
Features Editor: Adam Lowe
London Correspondent: Simon Savidge
Cover: Melissa Totten
Yvette fielding Ghost Hunting Boys in shorts Courtesy of: Rebekah Taylor
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BUZZ
A return
to mum’s
catalogue
New
In the mid 70s there
was something
of an underwear
revolution… colour
was added and our
Who?
In an interview with Doctor Who Magazine,
boring white, ill fitting Russell T Davies, the man responsible for the
pants were never the popular resurgence of the show, has said
same again. Although he wants actor Russell Tovey to take over
they still might have from David Tennant when the next Doctor
sagged a little it didn’t regenerates.
matter because Out actor, and general good guy Tovey,
now we had red 26, has so far starred as Rudge in
and blue to include Alan Bennett’s The History Boys and
in our underwear Davies has said that he would be an
drawer… and “amazing” replacement.
colour felt naughty However, Davies is stepping down from his
and subversive. role of lead writer and executive producer for
Mums’ catalogues the next series, so it won’t be his decision to
everywhere were make. However, Tovey will be known to the
scoured by young gay shows casting directors as he appeared in last
minds for those erotic Christmas’s edition as Midshipman Frame as
pics of masculine men the doomed cosmic ‘Titanic’ was on a crash
posing in just their course with Earth.
undies and looking out
onto the vast horizon.
These men fulfilled
every lad’s fantasy
(and a few women’s)
of what real men were
all about (who says
you don’t know from
an early age what
you prefer sexually?)
When colour hit those
catalogues and the
guys wore matching
vest and pants - in
RED or BLUE for
heaven’s sake - it was
like the whole world
had turned around.
Jockey seem to have
suddenly found their
retro button and have
re-launched their
much admired range
of colourful undies.
They look to have hit
a nostalgia vein with
their new range of 4
sexy colours because
stores are finding it
hard keeping up to
demand.
Vest £10 - Trunks £10 - Briefs £8

www.deadgoodundies.co.uk
4 October 2008
bits
Framed
n?
Gay Ico
Bette Davis
• Born Ruth Elizabeth Davies she was to become
one of the greatest actresses of all time. She
was the first actress to receive ten academy
award nominations, first woman to win Lifetime
Reinventing
Achievement Award from the American Film institute,
and the first female president of the Academy of
Motion Picture Art and Sciences.
• She loved to play vicious or evil and dark female
the 80s
leads, she played killers, wicked stepmothers,
witches and crazed harpies, all of which the gays
love! Fierce. She used this well, so, whenever she
was questioned for her actions she reminded people
how well she could play a ‘bitch’.
LIVING welcomes you aboard the nostalgia express this Series Running Order:
• She wasn’t all bitterness as with Cary Grant she
autumn with the launch of its unmissable new TV series Pop
Goes The Band, as it turns back time to transform some of the 8th October - Dollar opened the ‘Hollywood Canteen’ where famous
actors and actresses served dinners and entertained
biggest bands of the last three decades. With collective record 15th October - Bucks Fizz servicemen during the war.
sales in excess of 30 million units, and a series of number one
singles, these bands once resided in the heady heights of pop 22nd October - Cleopatra • One of Bette’s most iconic roles was in ‘Whatever
superstardom, only to be brought back down to earth with a Happened to Baby Jane?’ which after she had
bang years later. Now, in 2008, the groups want another “piece 29th October - Visage waned from the public eye, was a comeback for
of the action”! With LIVING’s help, each band will be restored Bette and saw her star against Joan Crawford.
to their former glory through non-invasive surgery, make-up and 5th November - 911 These two divas were known to be unable to stand
diets… then let loose to perform their best known hits at a very 12th November - Shakatak each other and famously had massive rows on set
special reveal in front of fans, family and friends. Every week (every gay man should read ‘The Divine Feud’ based
viewers will witness the efforts of a different band as they bravely on these times).
undertake the daunting task of recapturing their heyday.
• It was from her amazing performance in All About
Bingo Big
Eve that we get the saying ‘fasten your seatbelt, its
going to be a bumpy night’.
gins
• Like all good divas she made her biggest success
from a good drama. She tried to leave Warner
Forty larger Brothers and sued them, this failed, however she
th
band RubyC an life ladies, the lege then had her most successful films and her highest
upids inva ndary Chris pay packets… see no press is bad press. The judge
recently to ded the op topher Big
perform th enin gins
eir new sing g day of London Fash and his said “…come to the conclusion that this is rather
world know le Bingo W ion Week
that ‘Size Ze ings and le a naughty young lady and that what she wants is
ro’s so pass t the fashio
é, Bingo W n more money”.
ings Any da
y!”
• She very publically went for the role of Scarlet
O’Hara in Gone with the Wind, as we all know
she didn’t get the role and apparently skulked and
sulked for weeks.
• She used her cigarette holder wherever she went

including all television interviews… when asked not
to she would simply wince and carry on regardless.
This and her desire for “everything to be perfect”
made her one of the most argumentative, feared,
yet respected, actresses and created her mean
persona.
• “I think Bette Davis would probably have been

burned as a witch if she had lived two or three
hundred years ago. She gives the curious feeling
of being charged with power which can find no
ordinary outlet” was a quote from one of the reviews
of her earlier career; we think she listened to this
intently.
• She married four times and in one case was

divorced and married within six weeks.
6 October 2008
bits
10
Top
It’s a Drag Race No-Nos
Being a drag queen comes naturally to some. It
also comes a lot less naturally to most others. for when you
So, in order to sift the good from the bad and invite a new
help you be the best drag queen you can, we’ve friend back for the
grabbed Leeds’ own rising new drag talent, Miss
Carla Jackson, and made her spill her trade
night.
secrets. If you think you can measure up, of
course, why not prove it and take part in this
year’s Drag 4 U?
1. What’s the one thing a 6. Skirts or dresses?
drag queen cannot leave the It varies depending on the
house without? occasion, if I’m putting on a
For me it’s my Max Factor show then I usually go for long
Panstick Foundation and elegant satin dresses, if it’s
Powder, and I always bring my anything informal then I’m an
ruby woo lipstick by MAC—it’s avid fan of pencil skirts, just
the best and tends to stay because I can pull them off
where it’s put. really well… not a lot of blokes
can.
2. What’s the difference
between a good drag queen 7. Where do you buy your
and a bad drag queen? wigs? 1. Say you’ll be sharing
These are all very subjective I source my wigs from a
things, because there are so variety of places and they your room with ten male
many kinds of drag. I personally vary in cost as well depending cousins from Norfolk…
feel that a good queen has on what I want to do with it. and your Uncle Derek.
personality irrespective of their Sometimes I order them, or
style of drag (it does help if if it’s a really special occasion
you’re a little bit easy on the then it’s usually a trip to Leeds’ 2. Still have a single bed
eye though). The one thing I’ve superglam Victoria Quarter to with a Thomas the Tank
learned is that you gain respect splash out on a decent one.
from respecting other people Engine duvet cover.
and it’s a principle that I’ve 8. How do you make it look
always stuck by. like you have tits? 3. Your stained underpants
Gregg’s pasties and the rest of
3. What’s your number one it is a trade secret! hanging over the bed posts.
make-up tip?
Blending, shading and 9. How do drag queens hide 4. A room dedicated to Star
contouring your face is crucial their bulges so well and
when applying your makeup. does it not hurt? Wars.
It completely changes the Pulling your penis between your
shape of your face and hides or legs, very tight Speedos and 5. Posters of Jeffrey
softens masculine features. a few pairs of tights to secure
everything into place. It’s more Dahmer on the wall.
4. Who is your inspiration? annoying than uncomfortable—
I draw my inspiration from a especially if you need a wee! 6. Posters of Gary Glitter
lot of my friends on the gay
scene that are working drag 10. Why do you think so on the wall.
queens or have had successful many guys get turned on by
previous careers doing drag. drag queens? 7. Pet boa constrictor
I’m not self-taught; I can Because we look better than
honestly say I’ve learned from their girlfriends and we have being free to roam.
the best queens in the business bigger willies than they do? No,
and they all know who they are. in all honesty I’ve never quite 8. The smell of piss and the
understood it and don’t really
5. Stilettos, flats or wedges think about it too much. sheets still airing over the
and why? radiator.
Oh, it’s got to be stilettos every
time! For me they just make my
legs look super toned and long, 9. Your collection of 100
and they make your bottom decapitated Care Bears on
fabulous too! display.
Miss Carla Jackson can be found all over the
Leeds gay scene, adding glamour and style 10. Still share with your
wherever she goes. mummy.
For more Drag4U info call Kevan Riggett on
01226 738693
8 October 2008
in arrangement with Tim Reed Management presents
L I V E
HAMMERSMITH LAYOVER
Live At The Hammersmith Apollo
EXTRA SHOW ADDED DUE TO PHENOMENAL DEMAND!
Thursday November 27th at 8.00pm
Saturday November 29th at 8.00pm

Tickets: 08448 44 47 480
www.hammersmithapollo.net
www.pamann.com www.myspace.com/pamannairhostess
bits
Lego
land it
ain’t!
Sweet plastic figures, all cute and
brightly coloured – it could be
something straight out of CBeebies.
Alas, the language and storylines,
together with some very strange
sexual positions of the characters
mean that this new E4 comedy series
will remain late night fare. Rick and
Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple In
All the World, is set in the fictional
pink US enclave of West Lahunga
Beach, it’s an animated (possibly Lego
inspired) toy-figure sitcom that’s funny,
bitchy, stereotypical and completely
un PC. YEAH!
Catch it while you can on E4 -
10.30-Wednesday
The Living of
Boy George
George O’Dowd has done quite
a bit in his lifetime to make a very
interesting stage production in
his own right. George’s hit stage
show Taboo may have told the
story of Leigh Bowery and other’s
“EACH Click
of his ilk back in the 80s but now
the spotlihght is about to fall on
George again. The Boy himself is
set to become the subject of a new
satellite TV channel series called
Living With… The Living show,
which forms part of the digital
channel’s autumn 2008 and winter
Fights Crime”
2009 schedule, will go behind the Award-winning charity EACH (Educational
scenes of Boy George’s life as he
releases his next single, and will Action Challenging Homophobia) is proud to
reflect the pressures as he prepares announce the launch of its newly refurbished
for an up and coming tour, his DJ website and online reporting service for targets
shows and his relationship with his
family members. of homophobic or transphobic incidents.
“With computer ownership and usage so extensive today,
expanding our service into online reporting was a logical
Jacko’s Pantos
development for EACH’s Homophobic Incident Reporting
Service,” explains EACH’s Executive Director, Jonathan
Charlesworth.
Michael Jackson’s notorious tighty whities are up for grabs. The recent YouGov national survey, commissioned by
A pair of size-28 Calvin Klein white briefs once belonging to Stonewall, into the reporting of homophobic crimes reflects
Wacko Jacko will be auctioned on eBay with a supposed that although the police are more likely to receive the report of
reserve price of $1million. The unwashed underpants a homophobic incident than anyone else, 68% of respondents
have a sensational past. They were part of the evidence never reported an incident to anyone whilst 34% of respondents
confiscated in 2003 by then-Santa Barbara DA Tom believed the police would not or could not do anything and
Sneddon, who wanted a DNA sample for his unsuccessful 27% thought their report would not be taken seriously.
child-molestation case against the washed-up King of Pop.
For extra authenticity, the briefs come sealed in an evidence bag and wrapped with
police tape. Also being sold are the Gloved One’s handwritten note explaining why www.eachaction.org.uk
he wants an annulment from Lisa Marie Presley and a used half-ounce tube of skin-
bleaching cream. Unwashed pants being sold on eBay is against their rules so it is EACH’s freephone Actionline 0808 1000 143 - for young people
probably doubtful if they will ever appear on the site. However, we’re sure that they are is available across the UK. Calls from payphones and landlines
spotlessly white… like Jacko himself. are free. Some mobile service providers may charge.
10 October 2008
Jolly Good
Rogering
Contrary to rumours…
Royal Navy tourism bosses
have not had to remove a
rather ‘questionable’ poster
advertising the Portsmouth
Historic Dockyard
Some may have seen the image
in an alternative light but a spokes
person for the Dockyard said: “We
are surprised and quite intrigued
by the sudden burst of interest
generated in this advertisement,
which has been in consistent use
for some 2 years and for which we
have received no complaints, either
previously or in the last few days.
There has been some internet
chatter, some of it full of double
entendre and even amusing, and
it is now clear to us that for those
that have a mind to, the advert is
open to misinterpretation.”
www.historicdockyard.co.uk
Franco
no-no
In the Gus Van Sant
directed movie Milk, which
is a about the later life
and assassination of San Tom of Finland No.1508-1973(tm)
Francisco city supervisor
Tom goes Scouse

and gay rights activist
Harvey Milk, played by Sean
Penn... there was more
than just acting involved. Gaydar.co.uk, the world’s largest personals
Penn’s cute co-star is web site for Gay men continues its
James Franco (Spider-man
3) who has been telling sponsorship agreement with Homotopia
The Guardian about his and extends its commitment by sponsoring
preparation for his role as the Tom of Finland Retrospective.
gay in the movie. He plays This exhibition is a major retrospective of the drawings
opposite Penn, and in it by legendary gay artist Tom of Finland. Eighty eight
they make out but Franco works on paper from 1944 - 1989 will be shown
found kissing a guy weird. from the Tom of Finland Foundation’s permanent
“Sean and I did talk about collection. The Exhibition includes 25 of the artist’s
spending the night together most iconic works, each on representing one of the
on the set where we did twenty five years his Foundation has been at the helm
the apartment scenes, but of preserving, protecting and promoting the erotic
it never happened.” Franco arts. This is the first time such a large scale exhibition
said he is very pleased with has been showcased in Great Britain. Homotopia
how the film turned out, and takes place this year from November 1 to November
also shared an interesting 30. Bold and ambitious in scope and scale, the
insight into how he prepares event crosses film, theatre, dance, art, performance,
for roles. “He hung out photography, debate, heritage and storytelling.
with a real-life hustler for
Sonny (2002), even sitting
in on - but not, he insists, Tom of Finland Retrospective
participating in - a cocaine- Contemporary Urban Centre,
doused threesome in a New Liverpool
Orleans hotel room.” Now on until 30th November.
PROK & FITCH
Fledgeling record label Floorplay up the ante with their vibrant What have you been getting up to?
new signing: Prok & Fitch. Everyone’s wanted a piece of these We’ve been working really hard this summer, putting
boys since their legendary remix of ‘Kinetic’ last year, and Bent in some serious time in the studio and some serious
time with our great friend Mr Sambuca in the DJ
have managed to get a slice, just for you. booth! As producers we’ve been pretty inundated
Mix PerFect
with remixes and so have been working to deadlines
for labels as well as writing new tracks, running
our Floorplay label and Club of the same name in
Brighton. We’ve also done a fair amount of travelling
over the past few months too, visiting lots of new
. places and meeting some wicked people along the
way

What inspires you musically?
We’re both big fans of the Dutch sound at the
moment, and James has always been a big fan of
the early disco stuff from the 70’s and 80’s, although
his moustache isn’t coming along too well.

If you could be King of Discs or Emperor of
Vinyl, which would you be and why?
King of the Discs, as less weight to carry and you
can do a lot more with CD’s when you’re playing out!
Its pains us to say that vinyl is dead, it used to be
such fun spanking each other with that plastic, but
now it’s all gone!!

What was the strangest gig you’ve ever done?
We did a private party at a house where the woman
was an antiques seller. All the people were about 50
and kept complaining about the music, and our only
salvation was all the models walking around in next
to nothing!

If you could shoot one celeb, marry another
and shag a third… spill the beans!!!
Shoot - Pete Tong - so we can nick his spot on

Radio 1
Marry - Nigela Lawson - for a guaranteed good feed
every day
Shag - Megan Fox - surname says it all!

www.prokandfitch.com
12 October 2008
bits
Not so
Little
Britain
There’s no
stopping those
Little Britain
characters
as they are
about to be
unleashed
DragOn on a very
suspecting
American
BA Photojournalism student Mark Lacey spent
much of the summer of 2008 in an improvised
public.
Everyone seems
photo studio above legendary Swansea gay
to know about
bar, Champers. As a result, he ended up,
them already, and
almost by default, taking photographs of drag
they are getting
artists, both amateur and semi-pro. Having
rave reviews from
generated a substantial body of work, The
all the US based
Elysium Artspace invited Mark to create an
celebrities, so they
exhibition around these images. As a result,
are destined to be developed with US studio own work as well as
the show incorporates studio portraits, candid
huge. In the meantime, Dreamworks, will see producing sketches for
moments, a hilarious ‘Dragathon’ race through
Matt Lucas has revealed the two men play five or other comedians.
the streets of Swansea and the ‘Drag Is Murder’
he is working on a film, six characters à la Mike The duo have become
sequence, specifically created for the show.
which will see him and Myers and Eddie Murphy. partners in the British
DragOn 24th-31st October David Walliams playing And still no end to the version of Funny Or Die,
The Elysium Artspace, 41 High Street, multiple characters. guys workload… the the popular US site set
Swansea, SA1 1LY. Speaking to BBC news, two stars have launched up by Will Ferrell.
www.elysiumgallery.com Lucas revealed that a comedy website, www.funnyordie.co.uk
wwwMarkFrancisLacey.com the film, currently being showcasing their
13
ALBUMS
by Adam Lowe
ALBUM OF THE MONTH
4SNOW PATROL
A Hundred Million Suns
Out: 27th October
The boys behind the epic ‘Chasing Cars’ return with
their new album, preceded by the single ‘Take Back
the City’. Produced by Jacknife Lee (Bloc Party, REM,
U2), this is a shimmering, hearty album with all the
Patrol’s key markers: heartbreaking vocals, aching
music and sumptuous lyrics.
4BOB DYLAN 4JAZZIE B 4NIGEL OF 4ARMAND VAN 4NELL BRYDEN

Tell Tell Signs Masterpiece BERMONDSEY HELDEN Second Time Around
Out: 6th October Out: 13th October Nigel of Bermondsey New York: A Mix Odyssey Two Out: 27th October
Dylan’s back to his old The man known to us as Out: 20th October Out: 13th October Pop chanteuse Nell, who’s
tricks—making wonderful Jazzie B of Soul II Soul, One part of the super- Southern Fried’s latest mix, funded her current tour with a
music. Having sold more but to his mother as glam Gay Dad, Nigel of helmed by the super talented picture she found in her attic
than 110 million albums Trevor Beresford Romeo Bermondsey brings us Armand van Helden no less, and flogged at Sotheby’s for
over five decades in the OBE, brings us his latest eleven tracks of folk pop makes waves with the best £300K, releases an album
business, he hardly needs compilation album with psyechdelia. Colourful house music from New York. of country, jazz and blues
the money so he must verve, talent and passion. melodies and West Coast Included on this album are with sassy demure. Multi-
do this for the love of This triple CD mix includes currents weave together Chill Rob G, Roxane Shante, instrumentalist Nell has shot
music—and it really shows. genre greats such as Kool & in his deft hands, showing Kwame and Queen Latifah. to the top of the charts with
For a limited time the first the Gang, Frankie Knuckles, off years of practise and Such a varied mix could only nothing but determination and
single, ‘Dreamin’ of You’ is Cypress Hill and Wookie. experience. The first single come from Helden, it seems, blind luck—well, let’s not forget
available free at bobdylan. ‘Overload’, which is about and here he shows his worth incandescent talent, too!
com, so check it out for Chernobyl, is a nuclear and then some. Definitely a
yourself. showcase of talent ready great party album!
to explode into the charts.
14 October 2008
maria & armand
They Ain’t Breaking

Her Down
Armand Van Helden
It’s been a while since Maria Lawson graced our
screens on X Factor with her stunning vocals that
made her a favourite before her questionable Armand Van Helden has had a glittering career in dance
departure. Now after a break and a new record label, music and has worked with the likes of Deee-Lite, Jimmy
Maria is back independent and stronger than ever. Somerville and Faithless. With the upcoming release
Simon Savidge caught up with her for a quick natter. of his latest album, he takes a moment out of his busy
So tell us about the single I think Cheryl Cole will be good. I schedule to discuss his life and loves with Bent.
‘Breaking Me Down’, its got quite definitely think certain artists with
a Tina Turner feel to it hasn’t it? some mentors get more press So what have you been up to Where’s your favourite place to DJ?
Oh wow thank-you that was the and TV time. I hope that Cheryl will recently? I’ll follow the palm trees, so wherever
inspiration really, I love my divas make it different by being true and I’ve been making sure I do my work they are. Maybe Miami or Ibiza.
Tina and Whitney and that was standing up to certain people. and making sure I don’t do work too.
the direction that I wanted for the Would you do it again? It’s a constant balance between effort Are you a studio monkey or a live
new album and the whole album Good god yes, I mean it was and procrastination, and doing too DJ at heart?
I just can’t wait for people to hear. surreal but I wouldn’t change it for much and taking time off. You’ve really I guess I’m a studio monkey. I really
It’s quite rocky soulful and R&B but the world. When else do you get got to balance things in this industry, love getting in there and tinkering away
with some pop. Diane Warren wrote whisked to Beverly Hills or get to otherwise it can become oppressive. to my heart’s desire. Plus it’s always
a song called ‘Stronger’ for it and work with Simon Cowell. It was great to see your efforts paid off with
she is one of my idols. I wanna be such an exciting time and I wouldn’t Describe your career in exactly an album or a single—something you
a rock diva. The single and whole be in this position today. thirteen letters. can actually hold and listen to again.
album are based on the ups and Are you looking forward to That’s the oddest question ever. I’ll say
downs of the past couple of years, getting back out there and constructive because that’s 13 letters. Paris or Nicole?
it’s been a real rollercoaster ride. meeting your gay fans again? Is it 13 letters? I don’t know. Nicole when she was chubby. I’m not
Does it feel good to be independent Do you know what I so am, I have a Paris fan.
now after your time with Sony? lots of gay friends and love the It’s twelve, but what’s a letter
When I was with them I had no audience at gay nights, and they between friends? What do you
control, they were like ok this is your What was your ideal job as a child
just totally go for it. I am sad GAY have in the pipeline for the future?
single ‘Sleepwalking’ and that is and does it fit with what you’re
has gone I did it twice once after I I have my New York A Mix Odyssey
what you are doing. I felt they were doing now?
was out of the X Factor, which was 2 CD out in October and I have a
playing safe with me, but after the the biggest high on what was an I used to sell lemonade and mow
greatest hits out. I’m also playing at people’s lawns, so I’ve always had a
X Factor doors open for you - one awful night, and I did a sleepover Matter on the 17th October. I have to say, strong work ethic and that kind of fits
minute you’re nobody and then you party when my last single came I’m very excited right now. The compilation with what I do now. I’ve always loved
can be somebody. You don’t get out. Everyone was in their pyjamas is some of my best work yet. music, so becoming a DJ felt natural
to choose your songs on the show or not a lot and I was on stage in a
well unless you were in a certain sexy negligee it was brilliant.. to me. I work hard at what I do but I
person’s team… When you buy mayo, do you buy enjoy it. That’s always been important
full fat or low fat? to me.
Do you think it was ever rigged Maria Lawson’s new album
so Sharon Osbourne would I don’t have a kitchen so I don’t buy
‘Emotional Rollercoaster’ is out food; I eat out. That means most of
never win? now. For more information visit the mayo I end up eating will be full
I don’t wanna say anything… but www.marialawson.co.uk fat, I guess. Which is bad, I know, but
there is a reason why she’s gone.
inevitable.
15
singles
by Adam Lowe
SINGLE OF THE MONTH

4KAV
Rock Chick/Soul Kid
13th October
Brit rocker Kav has already received
accolades from The Guardian, The
Clash and The Sun. Ignoring modern
indie trends, which revel in Libertine-
esque foppery, Kav relies instead on
swagger and rawness. ‘Rock Chick’
is choc with riffs and a searing chorus,
whilst ‘Soul Kid’ dazzles with pianos and
backing vocals by Josh Ostrander.
4BASSHUNTER 4SASH! FT. 4NATTY 4LUIGI MASI 4THE TOUGH

Angel in the Night STUNT Bedroom Eyes Strobelight ALLIANCE
6th October Raindrops (Encore Une Fois) 6th October 20th October Neo Violence
Sexy dance maestro 6th October If you took the ironic moronic Jim Beanz, who as 22nd October
Basshunter lets loose with By mashing up 1997’s number pop of Kate Nash and stirred collaborated with Timbaland, The Tough Alliance hail from
his latest single, ‘Angel in 2 smash ‘Encore Une Fois in the pizzazz of the Libertines, P-Diddy, Nelly Furtado, Justin Gothenburg and this is the
the Night’. This vocally-able, with ‘Raindrops’ by Stunt, you’d get something similar Timberlake, Shakira and first single to come from their
bass-riddled smash-to-be is Sash probably preparing to to this. There’s a bit of soul, a Britney, helms production upcoming fourth studio album.
taken from Basshunter’s debut claim the number one spot bit of indie and a bit of reggae duties at Luigi Masi’s Full of 80s rave, summery
album, which knocked pasty he didn’t get before! Since present in this sound, and the shimmering debut single ‘woahs’ and Swedish pop,
whiners Coldplay off the top ‘Raindrops’ was Galaxy’s lyrics belie deep sensitivity. The ‘Strobelight’. Gay boys across this is a shamelessly infections
spot in July. This one’s already most played record of 2006, song’s also smooth and earthy, the country will no doubt synth-fuelled sugarball. When
had over 300,000 plays on that might just be possible. promising polish without too recognise him from his support the Swedes do pop, they tend
YouTube, so you might as well much gloss and raw emotion of Sugababes and Girls Aloud. to it right, and this is a perfect
check it out. without overindulgence. Natty This hotly anticipated single is example of that.
is definitely one to watch. a great pop record and a sure
sign of things to come.
16 October 2008
music competi
tion
4Back To 95 - Back To 4Bargrooves: Disco Heat 4Armin Only - Imagine

The Old Skool As the Autumn party season kicks in, get The music of Armin van Buuren’s third studio album
We all reminisce the days when Robin ready for the latest instalment of the sparkling ‘Imagine’ comes to life in front of your eyes as the world’s
S, Tina Moore, The Original and Happy new bargrooves series with the triple Disco number 1 DJ takes over the Utrecht Stadium for his truly
Clappers were the biggest acts across the Heat CD set. Laced with mirror-ball house and awe-inspiring ‘Armin Only’ show. In front of 16,000 fans and
nation. Unfortunately we can’t transport disco flavours, get down to the magnificent with the Dutch nation watching on national TV, this master
back in time, but we can…set our stereos Bob Sinclar smash, ‘Wonderful World’ of his craft and king of the dance floor performs a nine-hour
Back to 95! Featuring tracks from the original alongside shimmering dancefloor gems extravaganza where the worlds of high-impact visuals and
oldskool House and Garage music’s hall of from powerhouses such as Joey Negro, music collide. With live acts performing tracks from the
fame, Back to 95 is the ultimate collection of Freemasons, Louie Vega, Full Intention, album, light and laser shows that manage to floor you from
40 classic anthems. Todd Terry, Ultra Nate and many more… all the comfort of your living room and a soundtrack so hot
compiled by Andy Daniell. This feel good it blisters, ‘Armin Only – Imagine’ delivers a sensory trip
One listen to this fantastic 2 disc cd set and
soundtrack is set to turn up the heat all the through music and emotion that will have you spellbound.
you will discover just what made this the
way into the festive season. Out Now: - DVD £14.99- CD £17.99 Armada Music
biggest UK dance genre of all time!
Out: October - bargrooves.com
Out: 13th October - Label: UMTV
We are giving away a copy of this fantastic DVD, A
To be in with a chance to win a copy of triple CD of 100 Armada hits mix and the latest CD
To be in with a chance to win a copy of
this CD just answer this simple question: from Stonebridge – The Flavour, The Vibe Vol 2.
this CD just answer this simple question:
Complete this Bob Sinclar hit title – To be in with a chance of winning this fantastic prize
The Happy Clappers had a hit with I
Wonderful _______? all you have to do is answer this simple question:
_____________?
In which country is the Utrecht Stadium?
4Ultimate Isaac Hayes – 4Mariah Carey The

Can You Dig It? Ballads
4Eartha Kitt Live!
Whether you were a fan of his music, movie roles With sales over 200 million albums
or animated characters, there is no taking away Mariah has certainly made her mark in This is, unbelievably, Eartha Kitt’s first ever live concert
from the greatness that was Isaac Hayes. From the music industry. Now you can enjoy DVD. These releases are recordings of her sell-out
his landmark album, Hot Buttered Soul in 1969, or 17 instantly recognizable tracks from opening concert at the world renowned Cheltenham
the 1971 release of Shaft, right through to his later the diva with The Voice, including such Jazz Festival in 2008. With a career that started in
work like the 1998, Blue Brothers 2000 Movie spine-tingling ballads as, Hero, Without the late forties and which is still going strong 65 years
Soundtrack and also his number 1 UK hit single You and Anytime You Need A Friend later, it would not be an exaggeration to call Eartha
Chocolate Salty Balls this man was a soul legend. plus celebrated duets with Westlife for Kitt a living legend. Her electrifying and unforgettable
In the last decade alone, Hayes’ work has gone Against All Odds, and Boyz II Men with concerts are always complete sell-out affairs. She is
on to be sampled nearly 200 times (officially, that One Sweet Day. versatile and multi-talented; she is at once a star of the
is), on recordings by some of the world’s top movies, television, the stage and a wondrous singer/
Out: 20th October – Sony BMG
recording artists. performer in both jazz and cabaret.
Out: 20th October - Label: UMTV Out: 13th October – DVD - £19.99 – CD - £12.99 –
To be in with a chance of winning Network/SFE
this fantastic CD all you have to do
To be in with a chance to win a copy of this is answer this simple question:
CD just answer this simple question: To be in with chance of winning these two terrific
How many million albums has
Eartha Kitt originals all you have to do is answer
Isaac had a hit called Chocolate Salty Ball Mariah sold?
this simple question:
but from which TV cartoon series did he play
Chef? Eartha Kitt’s career has been how long?
Competition Time Turn to page 74 for entry details

17
Melissa Totten
She’s Madonna
Melissa Totten is one of
the world’s best Madonna
impersonators with some fans
saying she out Madonna’s
Madonna. Now with an album
of dance fuelled Madonna
covers she has moved to
the UK and is here to cause
pandemonium as Simon
Savidge found out when he
spent the afternoon with
Madonna, sort of, to talk
chavs, Meg Ryan and oh,
some woman called
Madonna.
Now as we have seen today and I want people to re-book days. I have been doing this it’s the… ale? I mean in Vegas
and as we saw at Soho me and also buy my album… for 17 years now which is so we did these huge shows with
Pride you get mobbed as it depends on the crowd. Mind obnoxious to think about! I know the dancers, lights, everything
Madonna… you, lots of people have been A LOT of talented impersonators and you would eat a massive
Oh my god that was madness saying that I should get into my from doing this in Vegas and thanksgiving dinner and then
at Soho Pride, I couldn’t move tracksuit around Hyde Park and none of us thought we would do have to be spun round on a chair
for people, I mean its great but go jogging and get some press it this long. I remember saying and all that, she will do shows
part of me was thinking ‘am I attention but that’s not very ‘I am so not doing this when I like that for what 50 nights, I did
going to get out of this alive’ ‘me’. Two guys from Big Brother am 30’ but Madonna is 50 and that twice a day six days a week
but you have to love the fact who are gorgeous wanted to do she’s still doing it so I see it as a for years.
that people enjoyed it so much something similar so the joke was blessing. If I had been a Michael Why did you come over to the
and that they want that bit of on the paparazzi. Jackson or something I would have UK?
Madonna madness even when Do you ever have days where quit by now, enough of the glove. I got married; my life can
its not technically her. you wake up and think ‘I don’t True, and at least Madonna sometimes literally imitate hers.
Do you ever think ‘oh back want to be Madonna today’ sort of stays the same He’s originally from Canada but
off’ or ‘not right now, leave and have a Melissa Diva physically? has been here since he’s five;
me alone’? strop? Well fuck that I am so mad at he’s not a film director.
Yes and no, it’s flattering but I have to say being Madonna her right now, she’s too little. I People will be asking when
part of you thinks ‘I don’t get isn’t a bad person to be every can get there but it’s so bloody you’re gonna have kids next,
paid enough for this’ at the day. I’m not a big diva myself, hard. I move to the UK and then maybe you could adopt one
same time I am a nice person and I am not saying Madonna is something happened I was in from Africa?
(laughs) but you do have those peak condition till then (laughs)
18 October 2008
Melissa Totten
(Laughs) We are working on it in concerts and stuff you can be hole. Too many people are over
we were thinking of Croydon. rude and swear and people say produced like Cher was, people
As a name? ‘oh she’s being Madonna’ when also record a ‘live version’ in a
No (laughs) though that would maybe I’m not. But am I a fan studio and play it as live. Who
be funny, mind you David is quite now? I don’t know it’s difficult can really do the running man
an average English name isn’t it. because of what I do, I like her and sing? People aren’t stupid.
You don’t see him anymore. stuff ‘Confessions’ was amazing Do you think we will ever
I couldn’t wait to get out and have a Madonna the Musical?
How has the UK been to you
perform new material then. I do We should, I think someone
so far?
worry when she has new stuff should do it and they should call
Really good, I am aiming myself coming out.
at the Gay Scene here but you me frankly. It could be amazing,
What about with ‘Hard Candy’ it could be phenomenal, but how
guys love her so much here, you
and the whole R&B thing? would you choose what songs
think she’s yours, what will you
all do if she gets divorced and I was really dubious but I love to have in it? Maybe I should just
goes back home? Vegas was ‘She’s Not Me’ and ‘Heartbeat’ do it myself?
great but they really now just and ‘Miles Away’ she has her Is she aware of you do you
wanna see an Elvis and anyone ups and downs but that’s part of know?
else is just really a bonus, which what we love about her I guess. I think that she kind of does,
can be frustrating. What is crazy What about her latest phase I don’t know either way for
here and with the gay crowd is of getting her lady garden out definite but we know a lot of
that if I mess up the words, the and her crotch obsession? the same people. I have a good
audience knows it, that’s really You see sometimes you think, story about her where our paths
like wow. Manchester Pride, oh god I need to wear that, she sort of crossed. When she was
Soho Pride etc the audiences carries it off, I go for a slight making League of Their Own I
just make you have the most twist. Maybe when you or I are got asked to be a body double
amazing time. 50 we might want to wear pink for her in Chicago where I was
Well the gays love Madonna leotards too and show it all off living and working as a waitress.
here… (laughs) you’d look fabulous in I got briefed on who her stalkers
I know and she and I are so one. She looks fierce so I kind were and one night one turned
lucky and thankful, because I tell of think why not? I have said up at the restaurant where I
you what with Elvis fans… I will no to a few outfits before, and worked which was down the
just say I wouldn’t want them on if someone else wants to do road from the Four Seasons so
my myspace every day… simply my make up I freak out, they I phoned them and said ‘hi I am
no. They are a bit, oh what’s that do drag queens and so the Melissa and I do Madonna’s
word you have here (thinks)… amount of pancake cover up is double and we have one of her
chav. Redneck and Hillbilly ungodly I mean I know I drag up stalkers here and I just wanted
Chav’s. The kind of most cool, but there’s no stubble to cover to let you guys know’ I got put
funky and together sector on the I am a girl. People think I am a on hold and asked to repeat the
planet is the gay community and drag queen but my friends don’t story about 5 times before a guy
its great in America but so much help leaving messages on my said ‘Madonna has asked me to
better here, so much more open. YouTube saying ‘wow can you hang up on you now’. Can you
I love it. I have turned down believe that’s a guy’. believe it Madonna technically
Vegas again and 3 months in And what about when she hung up on me… the irony
Hawaii… learned the guitar did you of having been ‘hung up’ by
think ‘oh for gods sake’? Madonna is unreal now.
Why?
Yeah! (Laughs) I got booked What’s your favourite
(Laughs) I know, but I want to
for a gig and the agent said ‘its Madonna song?
see what I can do and also
doing this CD has helped. I just acoustic’ and I said I didn’t have Oh I couldn’t tell you, it changes,
want to do it for people who a guitar let alone play one and but I couldn’t tell you my
really love her. I miss the ‘show was told I’d better learn quickly. favourite colour there are too
factor’ of Vegas they spent so I don’t have ten guitars on tour many to choose from.
much money but now Celine like she does but I can now play What do you see happening
and Circe Du Soleil have taken a song or three. with her and you in ten years
everything over. So for now I Do you think she has had time?
am happy doing Pride’s and work? She’ll still be going she’s just
gay clubs. I would like to do gay I thought she looked very ‘fresh’ signed a massive deal hasn’t
weddings too. I’m open to it all. on the Confessions Tour. I think she and that lasts ten years so I
You could do funerals, if she ever did we wouldn’t know guess I will be doing it then too,
singing ‘The Power of about it unless she ended up I’d like to do some more albums.
Goodbye’… like Meg Ryan, poor Meg she I am unsure if I’ll still be in the
(Laughs hysterically) Oh my god was our nation’s darling. Did pink leotards or anything, she
that’s so wrong, but so funny… I you know that once Meg Ryan might be.
could do that. thought I was Madonna, she If you weren’t doing Madonna
didn’t say hello but I saw her who else would you like to
Are you a Madonna fan?
mouth it. That was back in the do… Kylie?
I definitely was in the older days day. We were both having a
when ‘Holiday’ and ‘Borderline’ Oh the UK gay Kylie and
“cuppa” and I said to my friend Madonna divide. I don’t mind
were out… back when I was 15 ‘oh my god that’s Meg Ryan’
or 16 and got seriously caught Kylie I wouldn’t want to do her
and I saw her mouth ‘oh my god though, Elvis I guess, minus the
up in it, but I didn’t see her I that’s Madonna’. That was about
just loved her music. I was a big weirdo fans, I wanna keep my
ten years ago when we looked gay fans I love them so.
fan then, suddenly she was on the most alike without the help
all the magazines and TV and of drag. I am now Mega-donna;
everything and I started getting I am what she would look like if ‘Forever Madonna’ the album
people saying ‘Can I get into she was normal weight! is out now on Klone Records
your groove’ and calling me and is available at all good
A lot of people I spoke to who
‘Madonna Wannabe’ and all that record outlets. You can find
have seen you live think you
crap. out more about Melissa
out Madonna the Madonna?
…Now the jokes on them. at www.myspace.com/performerm
Well thank you to them. It’s
Too right, I went to a reunion probably cos its in tune… oh and to book her at
and they were all saying how that sounds awful, I mean when [email protected]
they Googled me and all that you do as many shows as I have
stuff, I was a bit ‘whatever, uh done you can… I am digging a
huh, sure’. That’s great though
19
lady gaga
All We Hear Is
Ladyo Gaga
Lady Gaga, aka Stefani Gabriella G, is making huge waves across the world with her debut
single and album taking the charts by storm. She is unique and if you don’t know her now we
promise that very soon you will. Simon Savidge found out why once you’ve seen her you never
forget her and why Christina Aguilera is stealing her style… oh and why she loves her gay boys.
So nice to meet you, why the name Lady Firstly I am a huge Christina fan, I have been
Gaga, how did that come about? forever. It’s difficult for me as someone who has
The name is from the Queen record ‘Radio stood up on their own two feet to pick up a leg
Gaga’ my producer used to just call me Gaga and kick someone like that as it only makes me
as I would go crazy and theatrical in the studio. less balanced. Was it seemingly inspired… of
It kind of followed me when I went to New York course… did she copy me? I wouldn’t go that
and I felt like a totally new person even though far. I am more excited a super-super star has
I am more myself now than ever. I like the fact done something left field, why kick her.
that it means crazy across the whole world in Already you have a huge gay fan base in
whatever translation… so crazy lady is a fun the UK?
ironic title to have. I fucking love it. I did OMO and it was amazing.
You named the album ‘The Fame’ how are I was met by gay boys who had Gaga written
you finding being famous? on their chests and they were going crazy
‘The Fame’ is good so far in terms of the way and the audience was just amazing. I love my
I am approached by the press. People seem gay boys so much. I was so fucking nervous
to ask me smart questions (laughs) so far, they though. It was insane. These boys were
get my sound and my references in that way. screaming and people knew the words. It feels
I am not really into those whole ‘what do you nice to be in a space where people just enjoy
want in a man’ type of questions, when I get what I do without so much of a ‘why’ I love the
asked that its so ‘wa-wa’. why’s as I am obviously stirring people up.
When did you know this is what you Why do you think the gay boys love you
wanted to do? so much?
Like forever, it was in my bones, I was born to I don’t know exactly maybe because I was
do this, like I am sure you were born to write, in so many musicals with so many of my gay
right? I have always loved to perform, in high friends but I love them back thrice fold. I mean
school I feel I was more of a persona and now that’s where I have become truly international
people say ‘how did you create this persona’ now… it’s with the gays, they don’t care if I
and I am so more me now than ever before. I have gotten to number one or number fifty, they
was in bands like forever when I was younger. still love it, they still scream and that’s a proper
Your sound is very unique and we know fan base. My love and relationship with them
how people love to pigeon hole artists, is true and not about when I need a massive
how did you create such a unique sound? hit or to sell stupidly priced merchandise, no
matter where in the world I am or how big I
Thank you, it’s just the way people are now
might get in the end I will always do gay tours
with music, you have to be this or that and I
round the world. Some artists use gay men
am saying ‘I am Gaga’ and that’s it. I mean the
and it makes me sick… I don’t think I need to
sound took so long, the artist I was at fifteen
mention names, plus a lady never tells.
is so not the one here before you. It bugs me
when people say ‘so and so was so different Finally the stomper ‘Love Games’ has the
two years ago I wonder if this is really who line ‘lets have some fun, this beat is sick,
she is?’ Hello, think how the average person I wanna take a ride on your disco stick’
changes in two years, you’re always evolving. what exactly is a dick… ha ha, I mean
I mean I did folky stuff, then rock, then glam, disco stick?
suddenly electro pop and rock and everything You are so on it already (laughs) and the disco
fun merged into me. stick. It’s a dick, it is what it is. I think I have
You have written some of Britney’s new penis envy in my own way. I have balls, I can’t
album, now she has had the hard side of help it, but in the same way I don’t like the way
fame… that some female artists act like a man to be
cool or to get ahead. I dress and sing like a
She has indeed but that isn’t for me to talk
lady but I act like a dude and a lady, I am so
about. Her new album is going to blow up,
sort of a gay man. Me saying I wanna take a
she’s a really nice girl and I think she knows
ride on your disco stick is so gnarly as basically
where she is at and what she’s about now.
I am saying I wanna fuck you but I am holding it
My favourite track on the album is Paparazzi and I am in charge and you’d better remember
where you turn the whole thing on its head and that.
it becomes about ‘stalker love’…
Lady Gaga we salute you!
Absolutely, thank you, you so get it. I liked
the idea of Fame and this whole idea started.
I mean here in the UK you have no idea until ‘Just Dance’ is out at the end of the year
you’re here how bad it is. Maybe I was seeing with debut album ‘The Fame’ to follow
the future or something. I liked the idea of a in the New Year but seriously you need
warped ballad, something that sounds sweet to brush up on her as she is going to be
but is dark. huge. For more information you must visit
www.ladygaga.com
Talking of the UK press and press in
general, after the VMA’s everyone was
saying how Christina has stolen your style,
how does that feel?
20 October 2008
youtube
by Mark Hawkins
The Wonderful World of:
10 GUYS TO DO
BEFORE YOU DIE
In no particular order . . .
This month’s Top 3… must see!!!
Josh Hartnett – Ever since we saw New Weight Lifting

him in Halloween H20, we knew we
wanted to jump his bones. Since
then he’s grown from a twinky kid
to a hunky piece of luscious man-
meat. Now we want him more than
ever!
David Beckham – Okay, he’s a bit

of a girl and he’s possibly slept with
that woman who wanks off pigs,
but we still would. Even if just for
the money.
George Michael – Your mother

loves him. Your granny loves him.
You know it’s wrong, but yeah, you
love him too! Maybe it’s the multi-
million pound fortune, the oozing
success or the dirty antics in public
places, but George can hop in our
bed anytime. /www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJghJUVZlFU
Christian Ronaldo – He can’t

string a sentence together, but he
Gay Chicken
can kick a ball. We all love balls,
right?
Ricky Whittle – Better known as

Calvin from Hollyoaks. Ooph!
Keanu Reaves – This Hawaiian-

Chinese-English Canadian, who
was born in Beirut, has a strikingly
unique look (and family tree!). Sure,
he can’t act, but all we need is for
him to moan . . .
Wentworth Miller – Is he gay? Isn’t

he gay? Who cares, just shove it in
me and shut up!
Robbie Williams – Sure, he’s a

right porker now, but we’d love
to be able to do it just to increase www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWfopP51Wn0
his feelings of self-degradation
and angst. Then we could sell our Zombie Gone Gay
stories to the papers. Then again,
would anyone want to admit to
sleeping with that?
Brent Everett – With a schlong like

that, what is there to say? Just bend
over and take it like a bitch. Maybe
in front of a few strategically placed
cameras.
Michael Douglas – Just to

understand what on earth that
Catherine Zeta bint sees in him.
Oh, that’s right, his bank balance!
Maybe she also gets off on the
zimmer frame? They have four legs
which can all be put to good use.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZuK_wYrqp8
21
theatre
Meeting Bent Bill
and talking Sh*t…
Steven Webb is only 23 but seems to have
been centre stage all his young life. Amongst
his many credits was taking the part of Jewish
and gay Posner in the hit stage production of
The History Boys. Now he’s turning his talents
to a play written about a group of 17 year-olds
dealing with love, aspiration, desperation,
experimentation and sexuality and coming out.
You seem to have been
on stage since you were a
kid… what prompted your
interest?
5Just Dance When I did my school nativity
play when I was about 3 or
Award-winning dance theatre choreographer Jasmin Vardimon celebrates her company’s
4 I knew I wanted to do it. I
tenth anniversary with a retrospective production combining her most popular works with
was always performing when I
new choreography. ‘Yesterday’ revisits some of the most striking moments selected from
was a kid, it must have driven
the company’s repertoire over the past decade, integrating new choreographic material with
my parents mad. So the only
live video and animation to create an exhilarating production stamped with Jasmin’s daring
option was acting or a bitter
theatricality and contemporary social relevance.
tour guide wishing I was acting

Yesterday What did you have to do
Performances: 9th & 10th October for your audition to get the
History Boys Job?
The Patrick Centre, Birmingham Hippodrome, Hurst Street, Birmingham B5 4TB
I was already in a show at the How have you planned your
National Theatre at the time so career?
my audition was just around
You can’t really plan your career
the corner from my dressing
as an actor, if you could I would
room. My first audition was just
be playing Fanny Bryce in
reading through some scenes
Funny Girl right now and filming
like most auditions. And my
an all-male remake of Whatever
second was with Alan Bennett
Happened to Baby Jane. I love
in the room. I had to read a
3Don Giovanni… a couple of scenes again but was
doing theatre so I try to do as
fashion opera much as a can. There’s nothing
then put on the spot and asked
like it. God I sound like such a
The Goodenough College, in the heart to sing because the character I
wanky actor!
of Bloomsbury, presents an exciting was up for sings in the show. I
new contemporary production of sang ‘Cry me a River’. Not the Tell Bent about the new play
Mozart’s Don Giovanni. Justin Timberlake song - that you are in?
would be a very different show. It’s called Shit-Mix. I am
Based on a new English adaptation of
the original libretto, setting the opera having such fun in rehearsals
When the show took off big
in contemporary London, a young at the moment. It’s a really
time… what affect did it have
cast and creative team of international hilarious play and there are
on you?
renown collaborate creating a unique little surprises here and there
Well it was already a success that you really don’t expect. It’s
fashion/opera experience: Opera on the
when we started so we had it set in a park in south London
Catwalk!
handed to us on a plate really. I did and focuses on five teens
Opera but not as you know it. it at the National, two UK tours and and their lives. The character
six months in the West End. So names are Lonely Boy, Dirty
Performances 10th, 12th 16th & 18th The History Boys was my life for Debbie, Raggedy Anne, Harry
October the best part of two years. the Hottie and my character is
Goodenough College Bent Ben. So just from that you
Posner is gay and Jewish…
London House Great Hall can see how fun it is. I get to
any connections with your
Mecklenburgh Square perform a camp routine to the
real life?
Dreamgirls theme, break dance
London WC1N 2AB I’ve just had a look, I’m not (or Crumping or whatever they
www.goodenough.ac.uk Jewish…. call it now) and deliver some
truly hilarious lines that I am
yet to say without bursting into
hysterics. It’s been written by a
friend of mine Leo Richardson
and I first knew about it years
ago when he started writing
it. So it’s amazing to see it
getting a professional staging.
I’m very proud of him. COME
AND SEE IT , YOU WILL PISS
YOURSELF!!
SH*T-M*X
Trafalgar Studios 2
14 Whitehall, London SW1A 2DY
On Now until 25th October
Box Office: 0870 060 6632
www.theambasadors.com/
trafalgarstudios
22 October 2008
Photo: Victor De Mello
theatre
3Looks like an Angel

From the pulsating heart of Bangkok’s exotic
nightlife, comes the show that guarantees,
you’ll never look at the opposite sex the same
way again. The showbiz phenomenon that is
the Lady Boys of Bangkok comes to Leeds for
5Blowing Whistles the first time. The spectacular and flamboyant
A sexy comedy about being gay, in love and cabaret show performed by 16 of the world’s
online is cruising back into the West End this most glamorous representatives on the Third
autumn with a cast including Paul Keating and Sex (Kathoey) has been acclaimed as ‘The best
Stuart Laing. party-night out in town’ in five major British
It’s the evening before ‘Gay Pride’ and thirty- cities; the two-hour show features more than
something couple Nigel and Jamie celebrate 250 stunning costumes, fantastic choreography
their ten-year anniversary by inviting internet and immaculate make up. It’s fun all the way as
date Mark to share their bed for the night. the girls entertain the audience like no audience
Mark’s desperate search for something more has ever been entertained before. They take
than a one-night stand in a world where no prisoners as the extravaganza glides from
romance is all but dead makes Jamie begin petal strewn traditional Thai tranquillity to
to question the stability of his relationship and raunchy western disco; from seductively sexy to
whether he may have found himself looking for outrageously funny.
love in all the wrong places. Devils & Angels Tour
The Sabai Pavilion, Millennium Square,
Blowing Whistles, Leicester Square Leeds – Performances 11th – 25th October
Theatre, London W1, 23rd Oct – 29th Nov Tickets: 0871 702 9510
Box Office 0844 847 2475 www.ladyboysofbangkok.co.uk
23
Yvette fielding
Queen of
Screams
Most Haunted has become a bit
of a Worldwide phenomena…
and if it’s not Yvette Fielding
(the lady whose programme
they are all based on) looking
all pale and bleary-eyed in the
darkness… it’s someone who
wishes they were her. In the
spirit of Halloween, Bent tracked
the lady to her own rambling pile
to ask those important questions.
24 October 2008
Yvette fielding
You are now officially becoming the What’s been the scariest thing so far?
Queen of Spooks and Screams; did you Oh we’ve just finished the Live for Living at
ever envisage this and the success of the London Tombs. There was definitely
Most Haunted? something sinister about that place.
The Queen of Spooks and Screams eh? I
like it, thank-you! We could never have You also do “Ghost Hunting with” would
expected the interest and support we’ve you ever do Ghost Hunting with the Gays?
been lucky enough to get through the Maybe Alan Carr, Graham Norton, Paul
show. It just seems to grow and grow. It O’Grady etc?
still surprises me when people come up and
Oh absolutely, just try and stop me. We
start telling me the things they’ve seen and
recently did a piece for the Sunday Night
how much they love the show. At the end
Project with Alan and he was a sweetheart.
of the day it’s the fans that make us keep
I’m also very fond of Paul O’Grady and
pushing the boundaries and hopefully we’ll
he’s already done a Ghosthunting with….
continue giving them what they want.
the scousers. That was real good fun and
I loved working with Paul. We’re looking at
Now the screaming… we love it, can we a few ideas at the minute but he’s busy, I’m
please have a lot more? You seemed to busy, you know how it is.
have got much braver as the series have
gone on!
Ghost Hunting
Have you ever encountered a gay ghost
Ha-ha. More screaming!!! Is that possible? and if you did what would you say?
I’d say yes if it made you happy but I don’t
I haven’t so far but that’d be fabulous
with Girls Aloud

want the fans to think it’s contrived. Those
wouldn’t it? I’d probably say ‘I see death’s
screams are 100% genuine I can assure
done nothing to shed the excess off those
you and are genuine reactions to genuine
hips.’ That’d put him/her on the back foot
situations. If you can handle screams
wouldn’t you say? Nicola: Before I’ve always been like - do they exist, yeah
galore, check out Screaming Banshees on
they do, no they don’t, whatever, but now I’m more like, they
the Paranormal Channel from 6th November.
actually do. And so now, I know what they’re capable of.
Camp as Christmas it is. It’s myself, Finally and a camp and cheeky question
Cath Howe and Lesley Smith scouring the (our Editor made us ask this) when did Nicola: In the pink bathroom, I didn’t have a very nice feeling
country in a camper van looking for ghosts. you last get the willies? at all; I had a horrible, horrible feeling, like I was full of emotion.
Screams, farts and snoring galore! Ha-ha….. I suppose I should say that’s If someone would’ve asked me if I was alright I would have
not a question a lady would choose to burst out crying, I didn’t know why and then when Cheryl just
Most Haunted is now really a cult show in answer, however… as a supple, sensitive got touched, I thought, no, I can’t.
America and all over the shop, does this and sensuous woman of almost 29 with an
mean we might lose you? appetite and a smile on my face, let’s just Sarah: I’ve got the utmost respect for spirits or whatever else
say we’re talking hours rather than days. might be going on around us. Especially when you have no
Oh never. I’m too much of a home-bird.
power over the situation, you don’t know what they’re going
It’s nice to go travelling and getting scared
to do next because you can’t see what’s going on and I think
witless in other countries but there’s no
for me that’s the fear.
better feeling that slipping between your
own bed sheets at the end of the night. The Kimberley: I have pushed myself, for me, that little bit further.
success in America is especially pleasing Like, I think I can do the whole mind over matter thing. I think I
and a vindication for all we do. could make myself stay to the bitter end, if I wanted to.
Do you get random people coming up to Cheryl: When someone stroked my arm, I wasn’t in a place
you and saying ‘oh my house is haunted in my mind where I was preparing myself. We were literally
could you pop over’? chatting about something completely different when it
Oh all the time love, and you know if I could happened. It wasn’t like I was thinking, ‘oh God someone’s
I would pop around to them all but, with going to touch us’, I didn’t feel frightened, threatened, I didn’t
the new channel starting as well as all my feel anything like that. If I was just in that house with a friend,
Most Haunted commitments, it’s practically for whatever reason and that happened, I would have died.
impossible. I am just snowed under at the But because we were here looking for it, it’s almost like we got
moment! Maybe in the future though, you the answer and I’m fine with that.
never know. In fact that’s not a bad idea for
a show. Maybe we’ll give you a mention on This terrifying quest for all things creepy and spooky sees the
the credits when we make a fortune out of it!! glamorous girl band visit some of the scariest locations in the
UK in search of contact with the other side. Nadine Coyle was
Do they expect you to always be in black so scared she opted out of the show, leaving band mates
(some of your outfits are gothic fabulous Cheryl Cole, Nicola Roberts, Kimberley Walsh, and Sarah
by the way) and expect you to be a little Harding to continue the ghost hunting adventure alone. Watch
bit scary too? the séance that sends Nicola running back to the safety of the
waiting taxi and feel the horror as a ghost touches Cheryl!!
There is a slight sense of disappointment in
the fans eyes when you’re not all in black I Be alone with the girls as host Yvette Fielding leaves them with
suppose but then again they’d think it a little nothing but a hand-held camera for protection!
weird also if I started screaming at the top Out: 6th October - £19.99 - Target Entertainment Group
of my voice and pointing at something while
talking to them wouldn’t they? Some would To be in with chance of winning a copy of this fantastic
love it though I suppose. DVD all you have to do is answer this simple question:
Which TV talent programme launched Girls Aloud?
25
Ghost hunting
If You Go
Down In
The Tombs
We Send Simon…
Today… Ghost Hunting
Bent Magazine sent Simon Savidge off on a hunt for ghosts and ghoulies with ex Most Haunted star Phil
There is a new attraction in London Whyman on one of Phil’s Dead Haunted Nights at Peterborough Museum, this is what happened.
and it has a decidedly creepy feel to it.
The London Bridge Experience, which
is warped in its own very gruesome Now sometimes supply you with any ghostly equipment that you might
way, tells you the gory story of London I get myself into need and I felt like proper paranormal investigator.
Bridge’s past (and believe us it’s a lot some unusual It was the third investigation of the first floor that things
more gruesome than you would think) situations with started to happen and funnily enough this was after
and leads you through The Great Fire work but I never midnight. Here we used the planchet (pointer for Ouija
of London, how to get a traitors head anticipated that board) to get them to write something using our energy.
on a spike and with some shocks I would end up Though nothing was written by a ghost another ghost
and spills along the way. However, going ghost hunter and I felt like something was blowing on our hands
its what it leads to that will have you hunting least of all and they had dropped in heat from the rest of the room by
screaming more than normal, for once with Phil Whyman. 10 degrees with no drafts. The Dead Haunted team don’t
you have completed the London Bridge However, after join in anything as they don’t want you to think they rig
Experience you are invited to enter The braving the anything ‘should things happen - it’s because it’s real’.
London Tombs… if you dare. pouring rain I Then the weirdest thing of the night happened, we did
ended up at a séance in one room where a girl appears. We were all
Peterborough and asking out (calling on the spirits) surrounded by dinosaurs
The London Tombs even have their to its Museum,
own gory story attached that adds an in display cases, suddenly it sounded like something was
once a Tudor running along the tops of them which actually made them
extra chill to the proceedings; it’s very, mansion… a
very haunted. So much so that when shake really hard. The other teams were contacted and
building steeped no one else in the building was moving, it honestly felt like
builders were digging out the tombs and in history and
happened upon some genuine skeletons an earthquake and no one else had heard it! Then a few
hopefully full of minutes later we all heard someone walking loudly down
strange things started to happen and the ghosts.
builders fled. the corridor and some of us saw a huge shadow, no one
The start of the evening involved a tour of the whole was there.
museum, with just torches and a few lights here and there. Am I more of a believer now? Ask me after I have stayed
Since they have opened tourists Shock horror I was already getting a bit freaked out and in the London Tombs in November! I am more of a believer
have mentioned seeing, hearing and concerned about cold spots and that was before we all but more sceptical all at once, which is a bit odd and
experiencing many different and spooky went down into the cellar. confusing frankly. I would recommend that everyone gives
happenings. So, be you a ghost hunter, Ah the cellar! Previous use as a morgue and autopsy room this a go.
weekend visitor or simply someone so, as you might gather, we were all a bit on edge. We
who likes to be scared half to death we caught orbs on cameras, heard some strange tapping and
recommend you head down there now. For bookings more info and a list of Haunted
also learnt how fear spreads.
Locations you can visit go to
After a break some snacks and a tea or two (they throw
For the perfect way to spend Halloween www.deadhaunted.co.uk
you a lovely buffet) we then headed to the top floor and
daytime, or just any day scared out of being brave I headed for the operating theatre to spend To Sponsor Simon and his scream team in November
your wits visit some time with whatever may be lurking there using an visit www.justgiving.com/theghoulies
www.thelondonbridgeexperience.com EMF meter to detect anything spooky. Dead Haunted
26 October 2008
terry & mr gay
uk
TERRY GEORGE TELLIN’ STORIES
MR GAY UK: The

No autographs please! Pride of Cardiff
Yorkshire actor Christian Cooke celebrated his Picture this: Stood on stage with 18 other practically naked
21st birthday at my bar in Leeds recently. You gorgeous men, only a tiny piece of red material between my junk in
may remember him as Jason Donovan’s son in the trunk and rather a lot of people staring up at me.
Echo Beach… if not… I can almost guarantee
you’ll know him better when his latest project, Photo: Darrell Hirst
The Last Van Helsing, hits the screens later in the
year. His fellow ‘Beacher’ Ed Speleers was there
to offer his congrats, as was a couple of members
of boyband Billium, Mel B’s actress sister and
the very cute Chelsea FC midfielder, Tom Taiwo.
Christian said that as all his family is up North…
he preferred to celebrate back in his hometown
rather than have a big bash in London. It all
seemed to go off well and it was great to see him
and his guests having such a good time.
Echo Beach boys Christian and Ed
They announce the runners up – 3rd place Mr

Hi Scott - have you OK so perhaps it won’t
Glasgow, second place Mr Chelmsford – by
done many of these win me any awards but
this time I thought I was out of the running
Pride events? Scott was terrific and
for sure. Then the MC Terry says my name…
Not many this is only the I was just so damned
and he says it again – I’m pushed forwards,
second one I’ve ever nervous. The year ahead
Big Brother’s Luke and Becks are giving me
While we’re in the world of One guy has even ended done. of me is set to be very
a trophy, Jane McDonald is wrapping me
celebrity I’ve been an avid up in prison through exciting with my move to
in a sash, pyrotechnics going off in my ear,
autograph hunter from the selling fake autographs, London for University and
camera flashes and screams I’m holding up Looking at the weather
age of 12, and I’ve noticed and it’s been said that all my Mr Gay UK duties;
my Welsh flag grinning from ear to ear. Oh my - is this the worst gig
that celebrities are getting you can make thousands like…world peace (joke:
god. I’m the winner! It’s still sinking in, I really you’ve ever done?
fussy about what they’ll of pounds every week if but wouldn’t that would
can’t believe it. I’m so happy to have won for The weather is shit, but
sign these days. you’re good at collecting be great if a Mr Gay UK
Wales especially – the first ever Welsh win as as always, Wales has
real ones. could bring that about).
Several football clubs have well! Get in! There’s no way I could have done made the best of it. It’s Seriously though, I’m
just warned their players Perhaps I’ve missed the any of this without the enormous support been a good day. looking forward to getting
to be vigilant when signing boat then as I’ve never from back home; thanks to all my amazing
involved with some
autographs as so many sold any of the thousand mates, everyone in Pulse nightclub Cardiff – a
So what was the worst charity work, I want to
of them are ending up on or so autographs I special thanks to Ginge, and all at the Mr
place to play? do as much as I can for
auction sites like eBay. collected when I was Gay UK team! All my mates are ecstatic! I’m
Worst gig ever was one gay kids suffering from
I know of one sportsman, younger. My favourite one still getting texts and facebook messages of
in Stoke on Trent with Jo homophobic abuse and
whose girlfriend made is a signed record cover congrats – it’s amazing! My family are really
O’Meara. It rained and bullying, with campaigns
£30,000 in a year from from Paul McCartney and proud as well; my mum dropped the phone
no one came. such as Stonewall’s as
selling signed shirts, and Michael Jackson which and when I told my dad and step mum they
well as charities such
even jock straps… and I will always treasure just couldn’t believe it, my little brothers and
as GMFA and Terrence
it wasn’t me that bought and never sell. To me baby sister (who’s only 8 – bless her) went Have you ever thought Higgins Trust.
them all. the whole excitement is berserk! I’m lucky to have so many supportive about entering (?) Mr
So it’s big business meeting the stars and people in my life; they’re brilliant! It’s been Gay UK?
getting them to sign it for mental so far. I’m the face of a fragrance; Well anyway, I hope
and the celebrities I like a joke!
you, not buying it on the Army Red which we’re launching over the next you enjoyed reading
management companies
internet. few months!! I had my first professional photo this; I look forward to
are onto it. I’ve witnessed
I also moved on to taking shoot - the morning after I won…. thank f*ck/ Which do you prefer speaking to you again
stars like Shayne Ward,
pictures of celebrities God for make-up artists ha-ha, I slipped into the Brekkie Show or soon. Keep an eye out
Gareth Gates and
instead, especially if they some army camo trousers, mucked myself Drive Time? for me - I’m here all
Ricky Hatton at book
were happy to pose with up a little and – hey presto – looks like I’m Drive Time. That’s my year ;)
signings where fans have
just back from a tour of duty in Afghanistan. natural home and where I
Dino
brought along items me. Fortunately, since
for them to autograph I’ve appeared on TV I’m going to Morocco over the next month to feel most comfortable
but their management myself, I’ve only been shoot my very own calendar…..crazy!! I’d also
refuse to let them sign
anything other than the
book or record they are
embarrassed a few times
by people asking for my
autograph… so I don’t
like to thank the lovely people at Cardiff Pride…
it looked like the terrible weather would swamp
the entire thing and it would get cancelled but
Any more TV
commitments…
Casualty, The Bill….
x
currently promoting. expect they’ll ever end up they managed to pull some of it together and it Hollyoaks?
They also ensure that in an auction! went ahead in the gay village instead of Castle
I’m going to be in SKINS
all the messages are Hill. I was privileged to take part and I met one
in the New Year, and I’m
personalised to reduce the of my radio heroes Scott Mills who I had a chat
still doing the Lottery
opportunities for selling to. As Mr Gay UK I was able to do my very first
every week. TV is fun but
them. celeb interview… so here goes.
not as much fun as radio.
27
news
NO – to gay
deportation
Subway
Liberal Democrat President Simon Hughes
called for a halt on government-sanctioned Boycott
Brad Pitt
deportations of people to countries
where their sexual orientation or gender Twenty two-year-old gay porn star Kurt
identification may risk imprisonment, torture Wild was fired from is day job at a Subway
restaurant outside of St. Louis when a
to fight gay
or even execution, speaking at a policy
debate at the recent party conference in customer recognized him and threatened to
Bournemouth. boycott the fast food joint if Wild wasn’t fired.
Wild says in an email:
marriage ban
“Make no mistake, the situation for gay Hey everyone. I just wanted to tell everyone
people in Iran, Syria, Belarus, Algeria, that I was just fired from my work at Subway
Nigeria, Zimbabwe, Jamaica and many because I have done gay porn. A customer
other countries, is dire. The decisions that said they wouldn’t even eat there at subway
the Home Office make on asylum appeals anymore because of my past work and said
are quite literally ones of life or death. For that if I wasn’t fired then they would boycott
Film star Brad Pitt has donated $100,000 to oppose a California
the Government to deport gay people the store. What I say is, if one person can
referendum seeking to ban gay marriage. This contribution is the largest
and tell them to, behave ‘discreetly’ to try to ruin me everywhere I work... maybe I
single donation to date by a celebrity.
avoid ‘repercussions’, is to require them should take a stand and boycott their store
Despite gay marriage has been legal in California since June opponents too if they can’t let people’s privacy be
to deny their identity. We would not ask collected enough signatures to force a referendum seeking to ban it;
someone to hide their gender, ethnicity or treated right. I should have the right to work
called “Proposition 8,” it goes before voters in the most populous US anywhere I can and it isn’t right or fair that
religious beliefs; neither should we do so for state in November.
someone’s sexuality.” people can keep me from working simply
“Because no one has the right to deny another their life even though they because of a “gay” issue. If a girl did what we
disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so do it would probably be ok.. and if a guy does
Simon Hughes spoke in favour of a policy desire if it doesn’t harm another and because discrimination has no place straight porn.. he is bragged about.
motion, entitled ‘Deportation to States which in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8,” Pitt - Kurt Wild
Persecute on the Grounds of Sexuality said in a statement after making the donation to the group The lad’s got a point so if you wish to protest
and Gender Identity’, brought before the Pitt and longtime lover Angelina Jolie are not married, and Pitt has or boycott Subway let them know why.
Liberal Democrat conference. The motion previously stated that they will only consider marriage when anyone else
was passed by an overwhelming majority who wants to in the U.S. is “legally able”. hwww.subway.com/Applications/
of members and becomes official Liberal CustService/frmCustomerService.aspx
Democrat party policy.
Throb no more
The Gay Travel Company Throb has announced, “As a result of the collapse of XL Airways/
XL Leisure Group (who were our main flight provider) we have unfortunately been unable
Also Lidana Ltd, who operates
Respect Holidays, Sensations
Holidays & Alternative Holidays
has ceased trading, leaving many
gay holiday makers disappointed
and searching to make optional
to contain the damage this causes us in both the immediate term and in the future, where travel arrangements. This adds
the lack of flight capacity we would have relied upon from XL Airways for new reservations further doubt to the stability of
makes continuing trading impossible.” other LGBT travel agencies,
considering their niche market
and the consistent downturn
in trade that the travel industry
is suffering from because of
the Global Economic Situation
and the high cost of fuel. A
spokesman for another gay travel
company Mantrav said: “Mantrav
has been in operation since
1990, we have a secure financial
backbone and we are fully
insured for any eventuality that
may befall the industry. We don’t
restrict ourselves to allocations on
airlines and we have a dedicated
customer base.”
28 October 2008
news
Assisting migrant gay men

A Resource Pack
The 5 least gay

tolerant places
According to the Independent newspaper
Welcome to
these are the places to avoid if you are
planning your 2009 epic gay expedition of
self discovery. Be warned that there are
Gay Britain many European countries that don’t come

up smelling of roses either. Check with the
Foreign Office about a countries gay rights
before you embark on your journey.
Terrence Higgins Trust (THT)
is launching ‘Gay Britain’, a Saudi Arabia
programme of work to help Homosexuality is punished with the death
penalty or, occasionally, a severe whipping.
migrant gay and bisexual
men who have moved to Iran George in trouble…
again
England and Wales stay safe In 2007 President Ahmadinejad declared that
homosexuality did not exist in his country.
and well, while getting the Should the need arise, however, there is
most out of living here. a law against it carrying a punishment of
A new website www.chapsonline.org. anything from jail to public lashing to death.
uk/gaybritain and a set of leaflets in six
languages have been produced that Jamaica George Michael apologized to fans recently and
include information on HIV and sexual The worst place in all the Americas to be gay. promised to “sort himself out” after his arrest
health, as well as a guide to staying Male homosexuality is against the law and and caution by police for possession of drugs.
safe on the ‘scene’, information on the punishment is 10 years hard labour. He was arrested in a public toilet on Hampstead Heath after
how to access healthcare and benefits,
information on immigration issues and Afghanistan he was found in possession of crack cocaine and cannabis,
according to the Sunday People newspaper.
where to learn English. The death penalty introduced under the
The police only cautioned Michael’s after he was said to
The pocket sized leaflets have been Taliban is no longer officially enforced, but it
be contrite with guilt at what had happened, and seemed
produced in English, French, Italian, depends who catches you.
very aware that a court case could possibly ruin his career.
Polish, Portuguese and Spanish.
They can be downloaded from the Gay
Nigeria “I want to apologize to my fans for screwing up again, and
to promise them I’ll sort myself out,” said the singer in a
Britain website or ordered by emailing Homosexuality is illegal and punishment can
statement issued through his publicist. “And to say sorry to
Andie Dyer at THT on: be anything from four years to the death
everybody else, just for boring them.”
penalty. Even writing or talking about support
[email protected] The multi-millionaire singer has had several brushes with the
for gay people can land you in prison.
law over his recreational drug use.
An enlightened
A Positive Future

President
“Gay couples exist and we must
Although the medical treatment, and consequently life
give them legal recognition”, the
expectancy, is improving for people living with HIV, many of the
President of Brazil said recently.
psychological and social challenges for positive people remain.
Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva also
Research carried out by GMFA found that gay men diagnosed
questioned why some politicians
with HIV feel significantly less optimistic about their future
oppose gay rights but still take
compared to before they were diagnosed. GMFA is launching a
gay people’s taxes and votes.
new press advertising campaign entitled ‘Positive Future’ designed to encourage HIV positive gay
The President said he is in
men to take control of their lives and to plan for the future. The campaign seeks to do this through
favour of civil unions.
relating the personal experiences of other HIV positive gay men who have experienced difficulty as
a result of their HIV diagnosis but who now have their lives back on track. “We must stop this hypocrisy because we know they exist,”
he said in an interview with a TV station. “There are men
According to GMFA’s research, before diagnosis, 75.6% of men felt optimistic about the future.
living with men, women living with women, and many times
At time of their HIV diagnosis this figure fell to 17.4% and although this rose to 53.8% at the time
they live extraordinarily well. They build a life together, they
of completing the survey, the figure is still significantly lower than before diagnosis. This lack of
work together and I am favourable.”
optimism caused some of these men to believe that there was no point in planning for their long-
term future and to engage in potentially destructive behaviours as a result. Homosexuality has been legal in Brazil since 1823 and civil
unions are allowed in some areas. However, homophobia
The campaign, which was sponsored by the M.A.C AIDS Fund, will also refer men to GMFA’s new
and gay-bashing remain significant problems in the country
website for HIV positive gay men as well as other appropriate services. The website can be viewed
of 184 million people.
at www.gmfa.org.uk/positive.
29
gay world cup
Photo: Stonewall FC / Simon Savidge
Boys in
shorts
London and its team of delicious gay
footballers the Leftfooters were the hosts
of the 2008 IGLFA (Independent Gay
& Lesbian Football Association) World
Championship during August which saw
football teams from around the world
out in Regents Park, along with their
lovely legs, competing to make it into the
finals held at Leyton Orient’s Matchroom
Stadium.
The London teams had quite a
Championship to organise to beat the
previous frivolity of Buenos Aires in 2007
but they did so in style. The opening
night was a fabulous concert and
opening ceremony at The Shepherd’s
Bush Empire. There were parties at Fire,
The Village, The Black Cap and many
others where footballers from all ovcer
the world got to dance, compete in Miss
World Competitions and even do a spot
of Karaoke.
As for the Football the winners of
the Cup were Stonewall Lions FC by
defeating the Agertinian team Safgay FC
5-0, they all played fantastically, other
winners were Canada for Best Looking
Team and The Yorkshire Terriers for Best
Kit (what do you mean that’s cheating
because we sponsor them?) the team
played very well and even let us in their
showers… we are now hoping we
get an invite for the same and more in
Iceland in 2009!
30 October 2008
books
Focusing on Elton
Terry O Neill has been hailed as one of the greatest chronicler of
the rich and famous for over 40 years. He’s captured some of the
most memorable and cultural moments from the 60s through to
today and in the process revolutionised celebrity photography.
His latest book Eltonography – A Life In Pictures

is a photo led book which charts Elton John’s rise
to super stardom. There are nearly 200 mostly
unpublished photo’s from Terry’s private archive and
its large, super glossy format is absolutely stunning.
£25.00 - Evans Mitchell Books
Exhibition
Eltonography: A Life in Pictures
Proud Camden, Chalk Farm Road, Camden, London
Now on until 2nd November. Admission Free
www.proud.co.uk
31
BOOKS
5Girls Aloud 5The Moanin’ 5Marc Bolan – Born

– Dreams that After to Boogie
Glitter: Our Story
By LM Ross By Chris Welch and Simon Napier-Bell
When 2002’s Popstars: The Rivals This is the story of David Richmond, The interest in Marc Bolan, the pop pixie
threw five unknown hopefuls together, a lost dancer struggling to reclaim and icon of the 70s, has never really
wrote them a pop song and gave them his equilibrium after his core rhythm diminished. His originality and metamorphic
a recording contract, no one really has been taken away by loneliness, rise from acoustic flower child to electric
expected them to conquer the world, disease and the death of his best boogie merchant catapulted him to the top
just hopefully get a Christmas number friend. It’s a tale about ghosts and of the charts and a fan base of millions.
one. Yet Girls Aloud are now the most intrigue, hope, greed, ambition Here the writers explore the career of the
successful girlband in the UK’s history… and mystery. Most of all, it is an first superstar of glam-rock, his effect on
this is their story. unapologetic look at the joys and pop music, his hysterical following and his
£14.99 – Bantam Press pitfalls of life. untimely death.
£9.99 - Qboro Boooks £14.99 – Plexus Books
5Ghost Lovers 5Leathermen 5All Balls and Glitter

By Kyle Cicero Edited by Simon Sheppard - My Life
This is self explanatory; it explores This all new collection of erotic by Craig Revel Horwood
the intimate encounters between short fiction celebrates and Strictly Come Dancing’s most outspoken judge
those of this world and those illuminates the dark desirous side is no stranger to controversy. He’s notorious for
inhabiting the realm of the dead. of leathermen – and those who his cutting put-downs and frank analysis of the
There are cops, masters, porn crave them. These well-written, contestant’s sometimes dubious abilities but
stars, Romans and detectives all intelligent and sexy gay tales will here he turns the spotlight on himself and reveals
embroiled in the misty porridge expand your horizons and stretch the real Horwood. His traumatic leaving of his
of the nether world which happily the limits of your imagination small-town home in Australia, aged fifteen, to
mixes the current with history. Look with some of the edgiest erotica embark on a transformative journey as a song
on the bright side – if you can’t get around today. and dance man (and drag queen) in Europe. His
a relationship in this life… there is £9.99 – Cleis Press straight marriage, his gay relationships and of
hope… if that’s the correct term? course... some backstage gossip and secrets
£10.99 The Nazca Plains you’d expect from the man who can’t quite keep
Corporation his mouth in check.
£18.99 - Michael O’Mara Books
32 October 2008
BOOKS
Top
5 GAY Out At The Movies
MOVIESSteven Paul Davies
Steven Paul Davies is a writer and broadcaster based in Manchester.
He was the youngest ever news presenter on national commercial
radio, presenting on Virgin Radio UK, but left to set up the
successful PR company. Bent caught up with him to get the
1. BEAUTIFUL THING lowdown on his latest project.
- I’m a big fan of Jonathan
Harvey and his coming of So what made you decide to Do you think its harder now
age story is very special. write a book on Gay Cinema? to come out than it was in
And it’s a coming of age film I have always loved movies the glamorous days of Rock
with a twist – all the usual new and old, and as a gay man Hudson etc?
teen angst coupled with myself, wanted to find out more Yes and no. Back then to come
the angst of realising and about gay cinema, there is out would have been career
learning to deal with being more to it than just Brokeback suicide pretty much; I mean
gay. The main characters Mountain and The Wizard of the whole film industry was so
are believable and engaging, the story is compelling, Oz. Both of those films are great different then. People wanted
and I’m a sucker for a (reasonably) happy ending. and are two different kind of gay these quaint and fabulous
The Mama Cass soundtrack is fab too. movies, one has become a gay family dramas and your classic
classic and the other was a gay pairings of Doris Day and Rock
2. BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN – The romance film film with a gay storyline. Hudson or Cary Grant etc and 6Out at the Movies
of the decade. Two of Hollywood’s greatest young so if the lead came out as gay
it destroyed the whole thing. By Steven Paul Davies
actors playing roles we would never expect - and Do you think that Brokeback
doing so outstandingly. Most people will admit to I mean now we have Simon The ultimate guide to gay cinema and
Mountain has actually
shedding a tear at the final scenes in the film – I Callow and Ian McKellan but the films that define it Out at the Movies
changed cinema in the way
know I did. My pal Simon Callow says it’s a bisexual they are an older generation so looks back, decade by decade at the
that everyone thought it
movie, not a gay film, but I actually think it’s a brilliant for some reason the industry history of gay cinema, celebrating films
would, we haven’t had any
gay-themed movie, very well-shot, atmospheric, and acts like it doesn’t count. which have defined the genre. Indie
gay films since have we?
has some incredible acting. films, the avant-garde, sex on screen,
No… I think Brokeback So what makes a great gay bad guys, lesbian lovers, transgender
Mountain was amazing and movie? films, camp comedies, musicals and
3. THE ADVENTURES OF PRISCILLA, QUEEN was a huge success and to gay rom-coms – all are featured here.
I think many of the greatest
OF THE DESERT My favourite gay comedy has have such great straight leading
gay movies are the ones with As well as highlighting key movements
got to be Priscilla. The flamboyant costumes and actors playing such great
the smallest budgets like and triumphs in gay cinema, the author
design are outstanding but this is also a very dark and yet screwed up men was
Beautiful Thing. That’s my all includes information on gay filmmakers
comedy, very sad in places as we watch the lonely fantastic, many people say it’s
time favourite because of the and actors, and their influence
lives of the main characters struggling to find actually more a bisexual movie
humour, characters, sadness… within the industry. Also interspersed
themselves, their families, and a place in society. than a gay movie exactly. I
it’s a real movie. throughout are some of the most iconic
What an amazing line up of actors – Terence wouldn’t agree with that per say.
scenes from gay cinema and the most
Stamp has real screen presence, and who could So not one of these When memorable dialogue.
forget Guy Pearce lip-synching to opera inside an At the time everyone said Chuck Met Harry films then?
oversized stiletto on top of a moving shiny bus? Lavishly illustrated and packed with
that there would be a flood They aren’t gay films they fascinating analysis, Out at the Movies is
of new gay movies… are just movie companies the definitive guide to gay cinema.
4. VICTIM This ground-breaking thriller, first Hmmm… there was meant making a mass of money after
£16.99 – Kamera Books
released in 1961, was instrumental in paving the to be a project with Brad the Brokeback
way for the legalisation of homosexuality in Britain. Pitt but that seems to have Mountain success,
Dirk Bogarde, at the time Britain’s revered matinee vanished off the radar but you so in some ways
idol, risked his career to portray a closeted gay never know. They are now its not improved
lawyer who stands up to blackmailers, at a time working on a project with Ewan gay movies mind
when being gay was a crime. It’s a good story McGregor and Jim Carrey. I you that was so
and I love old black and white movies but you just think commercially there have not gay, it wasn’t
have to love this film for what it achieved. Today, been some changes but I don’t even good or
yes, things are different, but Bogarde was born in think the industry has changed fabulous.
1921, and homosexuality was only finally legalized as much as people thought it
in Britain in 1967. As an actor, he risked a great would. So who would
deal to take a crucial role at a time when it made be your leading
a difference. man if you
Well no big Hollywood names could have
have come out yet… anyone?
5. MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO I’m a big fan of And I don’t think that’s going
the director Gus Van Sant and this film coupled Dead or alive?
to happen any time soon, it
together two of Hollywood’s hottest stars – River will though, eventually these Either or both?
Phoenix and Keanu Reeves as two hustlers who stars aren’t going to be able
live on streets, do drugs and sell themselves to Hmmm… that’s
to keep everyone silent or pay a hard one…
men and women. everyone off and the press will Rock Hudson
My Own Private Idaho is what I can only describe get something concrete at some or Montgomery
as a beautiful film which shows an entirely different point. Until then we can all just Cliff for dead. It
side to the now-dead River Phoenix. His acting enjoy the rumours and gossip. would have to
here really shows us what a tragic loss the film
be Clive Owen
industry suffered when he died.
for now.
www.stevenpauldavies.com
33
FILM
by Chris Amos
5How To Lose Friends And

Alienate People
Out: 3rd October
Based on the successful book How To Lose Friends
& Alienate People chronicles Sidney Young’s descent
from promising journalist to dismal failure at Sharps,
New York’s most prestigious magazine. Simon
Pegg hits the Hollywood big time with his hilarious
performance as the hapless journo. Sydney Young
cuts a swathe through Manhattan for all the wrong
reasons and his bad manners and vulgar pranks lead
to monumental mishaps with hilarious consequences,
until finally and improbably he wins the heart of his true
love a co-worker played by Kirsten Dunst. The all-star
cast includes Jeff Bridges and Megan Fox. This laugh-
out-loud comedy is funny from start to finish.
10 THINGS YOU
NEVER KNEW
ABOUT Zac Efron
1 Born in San Luis Obispo, California, and raised nearby in Arroyo Grande.
2 Has two pet Australian Shepherds, Dreamer and Puppy, and a Siamese cat, Simon.
3 On the American Billboard Hot 100 chart in November 2006, Zac had five simultaneous song 5The Fall
credits. All tracks were from the soundtrack of High School Musical.
Out: 3rd October
4 Zac met his current girlfriend, Vanessa Anne Hudgens, during castings for High School Musical
The Fall is a visual cinematic feast for lovers of
(2006). They were paired together near the end of casting to see how well they worked together.
art-house cinema. Starting out in Los Angeles,
5 The Zac Efron-Vanessa Anne Hudgens duet Breaking Free from High School Musical made the circa 1920’s, a little immigrant girl (superbly
fastest climb in the history of the Billboard Hot 100, leaping from 86 to 4 in one week. played by Catinca Untaru) finds herself in a
6 Simon Cowell offered him a record deal but he turned it down saying, “...acting is my main hospital recovering from a fall. She strikes up
priority”. a friendship with a bedridden man (Lee Pace)
7 Had his appendix removed earlier this year. who captivates her with a whimsical story that
8 His favorite movie is The Goonies. removes her far from the hospital doldrums
into the exotic landscapes of her imagination.
9 Favorite sports include golf, skiing, rock climbing, and snowboarding.
However his intentions are not as sincere as
10 Is currently fixing up two cars in his spare time, a Delorean and ‘65 Mustang convertible, both they seem when he manipulates her to steal
treasured hand-me-downs from his grandfather. morphine tablets for him. Making sure he keeps
the girl interested in the story he interweaves her
Hollywood hottie Zac Efron stars in Disney’s High School Musical 3: Senior Year out family and people she likes from the hospital into
22nd October. (Photo by Eric Charbonneau/Le Studio/Wireimage) his tale. A remarkable film.
34 October 2008
Movie Buzz FILM
Actress Lindsay Lohan has slammed U.S. vice

presidential hopeful Sarah Palin insisting she is
unprepared for a job at the White House. Lohan
also spoke about Palin’s views on homosexuality.
She voices, “Is it a sin to be gay? Should it be a
sin to be straight? Or to use birth control? Or to
have sex before marriage? Or even to have a child
out of wedlock? Is our country so divided that the
Republicans’ best hope is a narrow-minded, media
obsessed homophobe?” Ouch!
Former Star Trek actor George Takei has wed longtime

partner Brad Altman. Takei, 71, and Altman, 54, - who
have been together for 21 years - exchanged vows in 5Fly Me To The Moon 3D
front of 200 guests.
Out: 3rd October
Sarah Silverman thanked her ex-boyfriend Jimmy 2008 has been the year that 3D really made a big impact and is set to gain further appeal with more
Kimmel when picking up her Creative Arts Emmy movies being made in this format. After Beowulf and Journey to the Centre Of The Earth now we
award, despite receiving the gong for a song about have the first film designed and created in 3D for 3D release only. Fly Me to the Moon is the story
cheating on him with Matt Damon. The comedienne of three teenage flies hitching a ride on the Apollo 11 mission to the Moon. The space setting lends
split with the Jimmy Kimmel Live! host in July after a itself really well to 3D (lots of floating objects) and visually makes a superb entertainment experience.
five-year relationship, during which she recorded a Sure it’s a kid’s film but one that adults will be blown away by too.
comedy music video for his TV talk show entitled I’m
F**king Matt Damon. If you haven’t seen the video be
sure to You Tube it – is hilarious.
Welsh actress Catherine Zeta-Jones has been tipped

to star in a movie version of cult sci-fi series Doctor
Who – by Russell T Davies. BBC bosses were recently
rumoured to be planning a big screen version of the
hit show. He says, “Being from Wales myself, I’d love
to have Catherine Zeta-Jones as a companion for the
Doctor.”
Director Gus Van Sant will be honoured at New York’s

forthcoming Gotham Awards.
Tribute will be paid to Van Sant where the filmmaker’s
new movie Milk will be premiered. Milk stars Sean
Penn as pioneering gay politician Harvey Milk. The
trailer has hit the net and looks like the film will be the
biggest “gay” flick since Brokeback nearly took home
Best Picture at the Oscars.
Michael Douglas is set to play Liberace in a biopic 5House Bunny

of the flamboyant Polish-Italian pianist. Steven
Soderbergh is busy developing the project and Out: 10th October
wants Matt Damon to play Scott Thorson, who sued Comedy legend Anna Faris charms as Shelley Darlington, a Playboy Bunny who teaches an
Liberace for palimony in 1982, claiming the pair were awkward sorority about the opposite sex – only to learn that what boys really like is what’s on the
lovers. inside (since when?). Shelley is living a carefree life until a rival gets her tossed out of the Playboy
Mansion. With nowhere to go, fate delivers her to the sorority girls from Zeta Alpha Zeta. Unless
Executives at Warner Bros. studios are re-releasing they can sign a new pledge class, the seven socially clueless women will lose their house to the
The Dark Knight next year in a bid to win the Batman scheming girls of Phi Iota Mu. In order to accomplish their goal, they need Shelley to teach them
movie an Academy Award. the ways of makeup and men; at the same time, Shelley needs some of what the Zetas have – a
sense of individuality. Look out for Demi and Bruce’s off-spring Rumer Willis.
Pamela Anderson had to tell her pre-teen sons all

about her sex tape scandal with their father Tommy
Lee after they begged her to watch comedy movie
Borat which makes reference to the infamous video.
She says, “I explained to them... ‘Mom and daddy run
about naked all the time and we taped some things...
and someone stole the tape.’”
4Quantum Of Solace
Out: 31st October
The highly anticipated second 007 film with Daniel
Craig who went A-list with his blonde Bond.
Quantum of Solace continues the high octane 5Burn After Reading
adventures of Casino Royale with the storyline
picking up directly where that left off. Betrayed Out: 17th October
by Vesper, the woman he loved, 007 fights A dark spy-comedy from Academy Award winners Joel and Ethan
the urge to make his latest mission personal. Coen. The memoir of Cox, and ousted CIA official (John Malkovich),
Pursuing his determination to uncover the truth, accidentally falls into the hands of two unwise gym employees Chad
Bond and M (Judi Dench) interrogate Mr White (Brad Pitt) and Linda (Frances McDormand), intent on exploiting their
(Jesper Chistensen) who reveals the organization find they proceed to blackmail him. Meanwhile Harry (George Clooney)
which blackmailed Vesper is far more complex a married federal marshal is having an affair with Cox’s wife Katie (Tilda
and dangerous than anyone had imagined. As Swinton) and ultimately gets mixed up in the whole affair after getting
he gets closer to finding the man responsible for involved in a sexual relationship with Linda. It’s a twisted narrative
the betrayal of Vesper, 007 must keep one step and the main jokes involve Chad’s aloofness and Linda’s desire for
ahead of the CIA, the terrorists and even M, to cosmetic surgery. This is not as good as the Coen’s comedy classics
unravel the baddie’s sinister plan and stop his Big Lebowski and Raising Arizona but maybe with time it will get better
organization. like those films did.
35
DVD
Spicy Thai
A hit at film festivals across the world including the
London Lesbian & Gay Film Festival 2008 and winner of
a slew of awards such as the Grand Prize at the Brussels
International Independent Film Festival, Bangkok Love
Story is a truly stunning drama. We caught up with one
of the stars, Chaiwat Tongsaeng and asked it all started
for him and his co-star.
We have both always wanted to
be actors but in Thailand if you
want to be a movie star you really
have to start with modelling and
TV commercials which is what we
did. Each of us modelled for many
magazines and did commercials
such as Nestle! I was still a senior
in high school while we were
filming Bangkok Love Story and
Tohssawat had just graduated from
college so we were very young.
Bangkok Love Story is a very

intense and controversial
subject for a movie… were
there any difficulties getting it
to the screen?
There was no real problem with
the censorship as Thailand is
now relatively open concerning
gay issues. However we did find
that the more intimate scenes,
especially the passionate kissing
scene, proved difficult for some
Thai audiences to watch.
As the Love Story unfolds…

were there many changes to
the script?
The movie always aimed to be a
love story between the two men
so we didn’t need to have too
many changes to the script. The
director always wanted the film to
be romantic.
Was the wrestling around in the

puddles in your underwear fun
to do?
Both of us were actually quite 3Bangkok Love Story
embarrassed in that scene as
it was shot on the roof next Steamy Thai nights provide the backdrop
to a Skytrain station so lots of for unbridled romance, crime and action as
people were watching! We had to two men unexpectedly brave forbidden love
concentrate really hard to get the in this romantic thriller. Cloud, a stone cold
scene finished! assassin, is sent to knock off Iht, a police
informant, but in a twist of fate the killer is
What is the next project for you shot for refusing to pull the trigger. After
guys? making their escape, an indelible bond is
I’m actually still studying in forged as the physically vulnerable assassin
University! I loved making the film is nursed back to health by handsome,
but I’m actually not planning on married Iht.
being in any more movies for the Out Now - £14.99 – tlareleasing
time being. I really want to finish
my studies first before deciding To be in with chance of winning a copy
what to do next! Tohssawat is still of this fantastic DVD all you have to do
acting though and is currently in a is answer this simple question:
really successful Thai TV series.
Which country is Bangkok the capital?
36 October 2008
DVD
5Chop Suey 5East Side Story 5Dog Tags 5Eraserhead

Just like its namesake, Chop Suey Diego lives in the ultra conservative Dog Tags explores the cost of and David Lynch
is a delicious mix of ingredients, suburb of East LA, and is in an self-discovery as two unlikely souls Short Films
both amusing and flavoursome. unhappy relationship with his connect. Raised by his single
mother, handsome and sexually A dream of dark and troubling
Famed photographer and closeted estate agent boyfriend.
confused Nate obligatorily joins things. David Lynch’s first full-
filmmaker Bruce Weber introduces However, when his secret is
the Marines to support his fiancée. length feature film, Erasurehead,
gorgeous teenage wrestling star, out… and the area becomes the
On leave, the detached marine hardly needs any introduction.
Peter Johnson, to his personal property hotspot for young gay
meets Andy, a magnetic and Having delighted, disturbed and
universe. Weber is a man for men… Diego’s eyes start to roam
freespirited young man with big confounded audiences and critics
whom love, loyalty, friendship, further than just his Latino friends
dreams of Hollywood. Initially their in equal measure during the three
humour and beauty - be it a for a bit of romance. An uplifting
bond is purely platonic, but the decades since its release, the film
superb torso or sensitive jaw- tale of ‘loving thy neighbour’… and
smouldering chemistry they share has achieved almost unparalleled
line, a bounding, golden-haired not getting caught.
is undeniable as it sizzles into cult classic status and is still
retriever, or a pristine waterscape Out: 20th October - £xx xx –
something neither of them could regarded by many as David
- is all important. Peccadillo Pictures
ever have dreamed of. Lynch’s most remarkable work.
Out: 13th October - £19.99 – To be in with chance of winning
Out: 27th October - £14.99 – Both Released: 20th October -
Metrodome a copy of this fantastic DVD all
tlareleasing Eraserhead - £19.99 –Short Film -
To be in with chance of winning you have to do is answer this £15.99 - Scanbox Entertainment
a copy of this fantastic DVD all simple question: To be in with chance of winning
a copy of this fantastic DVD all To be in with chance of winning
you have to do is answer this California shares a border with
you have to do is answer this a copy of each of these fantastic
simple question: which South American country?
simple question: DVDs all you have to do is
What is the main ingredient of answer this simple question:
the food Chop Suey? What is the capital or Iraq?
Which 80s TV series is David
Lynch most associated with?
37
health & beauty
Giving good head

New RedKen for Men is a range of focussed
hair technologies for hair and scalp. Utilising the
invigorating rush of peppermint to cleanse and
protect, RedKen provides a ‘facial’ treatment
for the hair and head. The Invigorate products
energise and refresh hair and scalp, which is
perfect for today’s modern homosexual with his
hair products and painfully styled coif. There is
a shampoo, conditioner and daily fortifying anti-
dandruff tonic.
THE LOCKER
ROOM
The Locker Room, tucked away The Thicken products do as they say on the tin,
on the high street in Newcastle, and work wonders for fine or thinning hair by
is a wonderful spa and salon boosting density with a macro-soother to help
where you can get the fantastic protect the scalp. Formulated with preotein/
RedKen treatment. Service is ceramide, these products offer strength and
expert and personalised, with hair reparation. Style bonding agents also offer
each client receiving a dedicated fulness and texture.
therapist who can administer to The Moisturize range include protein for strength
their individual needs. The staff are and glycerin for moisture and shine. They add
all friendly and down to earth, yet moisture to normal and dry hair, with lightweight
undeniably knowledgeable in their formulas that quench hair’s thirst on a daily basis
respective areas. Specialisation of and help to keep it smooth and manageable.
staff means when you have your The Purify product is Retaliate, an anti-dandruff
appointment, you’ll be seeing one shampoo for itchy, flaky scalps. Protein again
of the best practitioners in the field. strengthens, but this time pyrithione zinc helps
Treatments range from tanning, fight itching and flaking, and bisabolol soothes.
hair styling and eye treatments, The RedKen range offers benefits from the first
to sauna therapy, facials, use, with a noticeable difference after use. These
aromatherapy and hair removing products are highly recommended and the
using the cutting edge Epil-Pro formulas used exclusive to the brand.
system. They also use the fantastic
Dermatologica range for facials,
which includes the tried and tested
AGE Smart product, which has
clear anti-ageing results.
The Locker Room offers a range
of treatments for men and women,
and is perfect for a day break.
Massages start from £23, Waxing
from £6, Physiotherm Sauna
treatments from £15 and hair
treatments from £10.
The Locker Room is located in
Abbey House, 7/9 Bigg Market,
Newcastle, NE1 1UN, and is
within walking distance of the
gay triangle.
3Showered 3Marvel Gel THE MINT

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There is a company that
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38 October 2008
fitness
SWIMMING
Swimming involves almost all the major muscle
groups, calling for a well-rounded weight routine
that hits both upper and lower body. The main
actions that propel a body through water are
arm pull-down and leg kick, so emphasise
strengthening your shoulder rotator cuff muscles
and doing leg exercises that involve hip flexion
and extension.
Swimmers should weight train three times a
week. If you’re training for competition stop all
weight training 10 days before the event, to
allow your muscles time to rebuild.
TENNIS
Tennis players are some of the best-conditioned
athletes in the world -- because they have to be.
Since a match can sometimes last for hours,
points and matches can be lost depending on
the skills and fitness level of the athlete. Tennis
involves lots of running back and forth and quick
lateral movements to both sides. So conditioning
trumps strength, and on-court training should
involve sprints, ball retrievals (line up a number
of balls along the net, sprint to pick them up, Website:JarrettJames.moonfruit.co.uk
returning them to the baseline until all balls are Mobile: 07876525392
retrieved) and more sprints. Location: London Center
The goal is not to bulk up, so tennis players can
Just
cut back on upper body training. Tennis players
should weight train twice a week, especially in the
off season, using moderate weights at lower reps.
BIKING
RUNNING Keeping
Fit
We put these two sports together because of
their obvious similarities.
Both are long-distance activities demanding
stamina and endurance, and they can be as
grueling mentally as they are physically. The
classic ectomorphs, runners and cyclists tend
It’s always a good idea to stay fit… for all kinds of
to be long, light and wiry, body types perfectly
reasons… but perhaps the main one is because
designed for such intense endurance activities.
of the confidence a great body gives you. No
The best way to improve at running and biking
matter what clothes you wear… they will fit and
is to hit the road and put the miles in. So while
look ace. Jeans will sculpture your rock hard
roadwork should dominate the training routine for
butt, undies will look like you’ve just been poured
runners and cyclists, gym work is still important
into them… and naked… WOW! However, not
for overall conditioning and injury prevention.
everyone knows how to keep fit and often think
Runners and cyclists also need to strengthen that one course of sporting action is OK for any
the IT (iliotibial) band, a long muscle that runs fitness occasion… and that ain’t necessarily so.
along the outer side of each leg. Iliotibial band
syndrome (IBS) is a thigh injury common to both
sports -- and it can lead to severe knee pain. The Remember: it’s “get fit to play sports,”
adductor/abductor machine works that muscle not “play sports to get fit.”
nicely, as will a good stretching routine.
Successful distance athletes typically have

greater muscle endurance due to a greater
percentage of slow-twitch muscle fibers.
Runners and cyclists will get better gym results
working in the high rep range(12-16/set) with
moderate to slow movements. The goal is to hit
the gym twice a week.
39
STUFF
3Twingo
You’ve just got to love a car called a Twingo! More
like the name for some snack but this is a little beaut
and everyone in the Bent office wants one. Along with
significant suspension and styling revisions, the Renault
RS Twingo is differentiated from its lesser siblings by the
fitment of a naturally aspirated 1.6-litre engine that has
been tuned to deliver 131bhp and 118lb.ft of torque. In
the relatively lightweight Twingo the result is 0-62mph
in 8.7 seconds and a top speed of 125mph. Fun,
Fun, Fun all the way.
£11,500.
4A touch of magic
The LG-KC910, the first 8 megapixel multimedia phone with a full
touchscreen interface. It boasts top-of-the-range camera capabilities, the
latest multimedia features and at just 13.95 mm thick, it’s the slimmest
8 megapixel camera phone on the market. It also has Assisted GPS-
enabled navigation and an embedded GPS receiver, giving users the
ability to geo-tag photos for later plotting on an interactive map. Get in
touch with your mobile provider for rates and offers on this fantastic unit.
5Lights, Camera, Action!

Dedicated video enthusiasts can enjoy absolute creative
control when capturing pristine HDV 1080i images on
HDV tape with the new Handycam® HDR-FX1000E.
Advanced manual features and latest-generation
Sony imaging innovation give videographers an
unprecedented palette of artistic options that’s within
reach of dedicated amateurs. 3Foreign
Price TBC – www.sony.co.uk language
- help is on
hand

Iko Eco, has just launched the first
two-way pocket translator, aimed at
helping travellers quickly communicate
words, greetings , and phrases
during holiday or business-trip scenarios.
Uspeak2 is the first ever dual-screen, hand-
held translator that is not about learning a
language but communicating ‘on-demand’!
Travellers can select from Uspeak2’s huge
memory of words and phrases to display on-screen
5 Powerful sound phonetic pronunciations. The English and the phonetic
pronunciation simply appears on one side whilst the foreign
Forget hooking your Internet radio up to translation will magically appear on the other side at the same
your hi-fi speakers; the Intempo RDi-W time for the local native to view and interpret.
is a powerful iPod speaker system and Uspeak2 is available in English-to-French and English-to-Spanish,
dock, loaded with Internet and FM radio. with a further nine language versions and 100 colour combinations
The unit has a hefty 30watt speaker and planned.
an integrated subwoofer for a bass-rich,
room filling sound and when it comes £29.99. Stockist: 08450 035648
to how you want to listen to your music
you’ll be spoilt for choice.
£170
40 October 2008
STUFF
5Villian of the
time piece
Swatch is to launch their new
007 Bond Villain collection. The
range of 22 watches are based on
each of the Bond Villains, every
baddie gets their own style… this
one is for Dominic Greene from A
Quantum of Solace.
£60.00
Stockist: 0845 296 2448
5Raw, Pure and Undiluted!
Smoother and more complex than any other premium
brand, DQ will set a new bench-mark in vodka by
introducing the World’s first undiluted liquid. Enjoyable
even at room temperature, DQ will tantalise your taste
buds with its distinctive yet smooth flavour – probably the
best you will ever taste!
£33 available from exclusive outlets.
4Putting on weights
The Selectech is a set of two dumbbells
that can morph with the flick of a dial into
any weight from 10lbs to 90lbs pounds
each. That means that whether you’re
a novice who needs just a few pound
weights or a powerlifter who wants to
curl 90 pounds, SelectTech will take care
of your needs. They are also the perfect
storage solution as instead of having an
entire rack of weights or bars that you have
to constantly load, unload and reload with
different plates, it’s all in one trim system.
£399.00 www.nautilus.com
4Sky Challenger
Introducing a fully three dimensional interactive game to
outsmart your opponent in the air, by using your flying skills
and integral Laser Beam to temporarily disable
the other Helicopter, accompanied by an audible sound effect
for added excitement! Undoubtedly the hottest ‘Big Boys
Toy’ ever… the PicooZ!
£37.95 www.prezzybox.com
41
FASHION
French Connection
£50 - Orange and brown stripe jumper
£80 - Brown jeans
Every ‘T’ tells a story

Old style
A T shirt company
Add a touch of 80’s street on a journey to meet
nostalgia with a clean-cut edge everyone, hear their
to your footwear collection this stories and make sure
winter with the ‘Star’ collection they ‘get the T shirt.’
from HUB. Reminiscent of Their T shirts inspire
old-school hi-tops, HUB has the people they meet
brought the look up to date to laugh, lean in or just
keeping details simple, classic say ‘hey, what was that
and effective. about?’ That’s why their
£69.95 collection is called ‘Half
Stockist: 07769694463 A Conversation’.
£32
www.iloveboxie.com
42 October 2008
FASHION
Orange Overture - £149

www.pigletchops.co.uk
The Marchmont
£55
Stockist: 01923 249 644
Remus - £60
0121 784 6161
Caterpillar - £35
(Blue and yellow check)
Eton has launched their ‘wrinkle free shirts’ in exciting Stockist: 01928 711073
colours and designs.
£130 www.etonshirts.co.uk Tom Wolfe - £38
(Yellow checked)
www.envyclothing.co.uk
Eco train your feet

Patagonia Footwear introduce not only a casual classic STORM
- the DAWN boasts a predominantly recycled outsole ACCESSORIES
and EVA footbed, along with natural hemp laces.
Claw Bracelet - £34.99
Walk and sleep easy knowing your wardrobe is causing
minimum damage to planet earth. Coin & Anchor Necklace
- £49.99
£80 www.patagonia.com
08700 278676
43
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travel
Groove in
Vancouver!
Adrian Gillan discovers why Vancouver, Canada’s vibrant
gay-beckoning city on the Pacific coast of British Columbia,
is fast becoming the San Fran of the North. Plus nearby
WinterPride up Whistler (1-8 Feb 2009)!
Consistently voted “Best City in Check out the Museum of cruisy, multilevel bar and dance club
the Americas” in consumer polls, Anthropology (www.moa.ubc.ca) with regular karaoke. For clubbing Paste together your own white powder
Vancouver is culturally as Asian as it is brimming with totem poles and heaps proper, the young explore Odyssey piste package via their website, NOW:
North American, hubbing West Coast of tribal underwear; Vancouver’s (1251 Howe Street), just off Davie; or www.gaywhistler.com.
tolerance, Hong Kong energy, frontier Downtown core, including older the cavernous and stylish yet popular
verve and good old-fashioned Canadian neighbourhoods like North America’s Celebrities (1022 Davie Street).
For more general info on Whistler:
manners. Dominating everything is the third largest Chinatown, street-cobbled www.tourismwhistler.com.
city’s stunning natural setting: fjord and Gastown and chi-chi regenerated
mountain form a dramatic backdrop to
WHISTLER WINTERPRIDE
Yaletown; vast Stanley Park - the (1-8 FEB 2009)
Downtown’s concrete forest of high- city’s luscious lungs – bordering the Transfer to Whistler from Vancouver
rises, which fair glitter and sparkle come But you’d be mad to come all the along the spectacularly scenic “Sea-
waterfront out west; and Granville
nights. way to Vancouver without tying your to-Sky Highway” on the Perimeter
Island, for a fun day out.
trip in with a stint up nearby famous Whistler Express (T: +1 604 266 5386;
Mount Whistler, home to WinterPride: www.perimeterbus.com).
TO STAY Western Canada’s largest gay Canada’s – arguably North America’s,
Metropolitan Hotel (645 Howe Street, population lives in the Downtown’s nay the world’s - indisputably premier
Vancouver; T: +1 604 687 1122; www. trendy and bohemian, yet never queer wintry party on the white stuff! For UK flights to and from Vancouver:
metropolitan.com) –classy yet intimate pretentious, “Davie Village” around www.aircanada.com;
Downtown refuge complete with spa Davie Street, in the West End. Down www.britishairways.com;
Expect over 4,000 gays, world-
plus outstanding regional eatery, Diva. a margarita at Sugar Daddy’s (1262 or www.flybmi.com
class skiing and snowboarding on
Coast Plaza Hotel & Suites (1763 Davie Street); stagger a few doors Other links: www.tourismvancouver.com;
perfect powder snow, luxurious hotel
Comox Street, Vancouver; T: +1 down to piano-bar Oasis (1240
accommodation and a week tightly www.gayvan.com;
604 688 7711; www.coasthotels. Thurlow Street, at Davie); then flit
ice-packed with dozens of events, plus www.vancouverpride.ca
com) - steps away to local beaches, across the road for a light bite at the
more après-ski parties than you could Tourism British Columbia:
Stanley Park and the gay scene, this Fountainhead (1025 Davie Street),
shake your stick at! Planet Piste at its
excellent haunt boasts spacious rooms pre nearby Pumpjack (1167 Davie www.BritishColumbia.travel; or call Visit
most impressive! Forget the cares and
delivering some of the city’s best views. Street), the local Levis and leather Canada on 0906 871 5000 (calls cost
woes of everyday life, far away and
bar! Numbers (1042 Davie Street) is a 60p per minute)
down below.
EXCLUSIVELY GAY
GULETS LAUNCH
IN TURKEY!
Shine Holidays are the first company to offer exclusively
gay gulet cruises in Turkey.
Traditional gulet holidays provide the perfect getaway for relaxing sun filled
days, evenings of good food, wine and conversation set against a back drop
of the Aegean coasts most stunning sunsets.
Each boat has 6 to 8 cabins, so whether you are single, with a partner or just
a group of friends, everyone is welcome.
The Turkish climate in June and September is ideal for the exclusively gay
sailing weeks. Tailor made private bookings are also available for parties of 8
to 16 people who can take over a whole boat. Please go to
www.shineholidays.co.uk for further info.
46 October 2008
Sponsored by:
Halloween
at Cruz 101
Friday 31st October
The team at Manchester’s Favourite Gay
Venue think there’s nothing sexier than guys
getting their kit off and as it’s almost Halloween
we’ve decided the quickest way to achieve
this is to scare the pants off you at Cruz 101’s
annual Halloween Ball. Now in its 11th year,
it’s become one of the essential events of the
clubbing calendar. The event grows bigger and
scarier every year, with stage sets and decor
the London Dungeon would be envious of!
For the 2008 event, Miss Cara will be taking
you on a wild ride as she welcomes you to her
Ghost Train where you can expect all kinds of
scary Halloween mischief and an unforgettable
night of tongue in cheek horror. Watch out for
Miss Cara’s demonic slaves who will be on
hand to ensure you have way too much fun!
If you like dressing up this is the night for you.
Anyone entering the fancy dress competition
not only gets free admission to Cruz for the
Halloween Ball but you could also win the £250
cash 1st prize on the night. All customers get
a free shooter on entry plus the chance to win
some unbelievable prizes for the best fancy
dress totalling over £1000. The night is also a
fundraiser for the Lesbian & Gay Foundation
who’ve got a whole host of prizes to win in
their horror raffle so please dig deep and drop
your change into their bucket. Funds raised
go towards the safer sex packs you all like to
pick up each night. Cruz floor plays Pop, Disco,
Dance & RnB Anthems courtesy of DJ Spook
while down in the Sub dungeons Rob James
plays Funky, Electro & Progressive House.
Cruz 101’s Halloween Ball is a night to miss at
your peril so climb out of your coffins, sharpen
your fangs and get your scary arses down
to Manchester’s Favourite Gay Venue for the
wildest ride of your afterlife!
47
Photos: ChrisGeary.com
Essential
work
After eight years rockin’ The
Gay Village and giving tens of
thousands of happy clubbers the
“night of their lives” we have
decided to make some exciting
changes to your favourite club.
Some of you have already noticed subtle
improvements like the move towards the use
of more “name” deejays and star PA’s but we
have even bigger and better plans in store.
We’ve now commenced work on a huge
refurbishment of Essential, this will be done
in stages to cause minimal disruption and we
will remain open on Friday’s and Saturday’s
throughout and the Sunday Sabbath will take
over Queer. By the end of October a brand
new club will be launched and you can bet we
have one or two surprises up our sleeve.
We will be releasing more information about
our plans soon. Essential, Queer and Glam
continue to set the standard with constant
reinvestment in YOUR Gay Village. For
updates and special offers sign up to our
newsletter at
www.essentialmanchester.com
50 October 2008
Have you got
what it takes
to become...
Europe’s Next
Gay Porn Star?
If you have then nip down to Spirit
in Manchester on Saturday 11th
October as they are holding an
exclusive audition party with a live
appearance from BelAmi faves….
Johan Paulik and Guy Parker. It’s
all because of a search for the next
big thing on the porn scene.
Have you ever sat in front of your
TV or computer and thought that
you could do better than the porn
star you’re watching on screen?
Photos: ChrisGeary.com Well, now’s your chance to prove
it! 2008 sees the beginning of an
amazing new annual event that
will travel through seven major
European cities in its search for
new talent. Two contestants from
each country will be selected to
go through to an all expenses paid
Grand Final in Portugal in May
2009. Where the lucky winner will
receive the incredible first prize of
an exclusive contract with BelAmi
worth over 20,000 euros, front
page cover of major gay European
magazines, the Face of Clone
Zone 2009 plus… an amazing 7
day holiday for two in the USA!
Apply online:
www.europesnextgaypornstar.com
52 October 2008
Europe’s Next
Gay Porn Star
Manchester’s exclusive
audition party at Spirit
Saturday
11th October
9pm - 2am
LIVE appearance by
Guy & Johan
Get your DVDs & Photos and get
them personally signed. Have your
own key ring with a Porn Star at Spirit. Guy Parker Johan Paulik
Apply online: www.europesnextgaypornstar.com
Spirit | Canal Street | Manchester | M1 3WB | 0161 237 9725

Management reserve the right to change or withdraw these offers at any time. Subject to availability. Spirit welcomes responsible drinkers.
Fed @
the Uni
Photos: Mark Hawkins
Federation is all set & ready to return to its new North

East home...
After a long hard look by its promoters and spending so
much time searching for the perfect venue, they have
finally found the perfect location at the Lower Level club
at Newcastle Student Uni.
Federation is one the countries largest gay-friendly club
nights and is well known for its unique underground vibe,
along with an award winning team of resident DJs, stage
shows and entertainment… there is always something to
capture your imagination.
At the new venue there are two Arenas -Arena one will
feature Federation’s unmistakeable soundtrack with the
very talented DJs Nik Denton & Jason Guy with their
Turbo-charged house, and in Arena Two is Right & Exact!
With the best in well known local & up & coming DJs…
with Big Mike Johnson from to the Manor Born, Hardwick
Hall, plus the Powerhouse’s very own Steven Pattison
plus guests.
Along with UNIVERSITY DRINK PRICES and a 5am
license, this is sure to blow any previous Newcastle
Federation events out of the water.
In Federations six and a half year history they have hosted
some amazing events across the world, including their
spiritual home in Leeds, Ibiza, Gran Canaria, Manchester,
Belfast, Birmingham, Blackpool, Liverpool, Nottingham,
Hull And London.
Federation @ Newcastle Students University on

Kings Walk
54 October 2008
Tests, testing,
testosterone…
and the best
in drag
The Viaducts Monday night Karaoke with Martin
continues to prove popular and our “Pint of
Fosters for £1-50” and “Three VK for a Fiver” offers
help you through the credit crunch. Tuesdays we
have Free Pool and Free Nibbles. The Viaduct is
pleased to announce that the infamous Marky
Mark is joining its ranks on a Wednesday and
bringing his own unique flavour to our new
Karaoke night. Corky’s Karaoke with Marky
Mark will give away Free shots to singers along
with a chance to win a delicious Home Cooked
Sunday Roast dinner. It all kicks off on the 1st of
October. Thursdays see the new “Uni-Licious”
student night with student drinks offers and Carla
Jackson and Anna Glypta playing a mix of music
to suit all tastes. Early evenings on a Thursday
we play host to the community action team from
Mesmac offering tests, vaccinations and all sorts
of advice on sexual health matters. On the 3rd
It’s our regular T-girl night when dozens of T-girls
from all over the UK come to party. Every Friday
we host our School Night with another chance
for free shots if you turn up in full uniform. This is
the night for those of you who like your oldskool
hands-in-the-air club classics. Saturday it’s Camp
Attack time, trios of the cheesiest campest pop
anthems back to back to back played throughout
the night with the odd TW*T Factor song thrown
in. this is your chance to win some prizes by being
the one who dances most like a tw*t. Sundays see
The Viaduct Showgirls with their in-house drag
cabaret. As ever DJ Lucy Lastic plays the music
through till late. Following the relaunch of our food
menu last month our kitchen is now open till 6:00
pm and is proving more popular than ever!
Viaduct, Lower Briggate, Leeds

Tel: 0113 391 2741
56 October 2008
Photo: ChrisGeary.com
Destination
a place to go!
The Liverpool Gay scene has been in decline for
years in comparison to their “neighbours”, well
that is all set to change, BIG time.
Owned and run by gay lads, Club Destination will
deliver 7 nights of madness on 3 amazing floors.
Same shite, different night? Not at Destination!
Already two top UK recording artists are booked
for October. Marcella Woods and Kelly Llorenna
will take the main stage in what are destined to be
iconic nights for Liverpool’s gay boys and girls.
Size does matter, and this is massive for Gay
Liverpool. Underground caters for the Pop Tarts
amongst us, whilst at street level (early doors)
on Destinations’ main stage the curtain rises
on a host of irreverent show-time bitchin’ and
sensational chart topping artists.
Then it all turns messy as our residential and guest
DJ’s take over till the early hours.
Says Mike, the owner of Destination “I’ve been
knocking round the Liverpool scene for about
ten years, and I remember when it used to be
great. Now its tired and needs a kick up the arse.
I hope that my Team can give Liverpool the kick
it needs, and deliver a top class Club, rather than
yet another average sized bar. Our Gay Scene is
really lacking a “Nightclub” in the true sense of the
word, we’ve just got a lot of small bars with big
speakers”.
For more info, visit www.club-destination.co.uk
57
Photos: ChrisGeary.com
U-pop
Expect a trendy crowd of sexy boys
and hip girls, whipped into a froth by DJ
Scott Kelly of Homo and Climax. The
music policy promises to be funky, slick
we pop
and fresh, with a commercial soundtrack
perfect for all those who like to start
their weekend early. Dirt-cheap drinks
are available all night, including premium
spirits such as Smirnoff and Bacardi and
“Homo @ Mission has held the crown a top range of draught beverages. Door
of Thursday gay clubbing for nearly 5 tax is £3 before midnight and £4 after,
years, and now, as they move to their or half price with NUS or a stamp from
new 3-Sum slot on a Monday, they’ve downstairs in Queen’s Court. Drag host
passed the title on to The Loft @ Queen’s Chelsea Denton of the Birdcage will be
Court, who will be hosting their newest on hand to greet guests at the door and
Thursday night extravaganza: U-pop. ensure everyone has a glamorous night,
Set to complement the Pink Pounder in her own inimitable way.
which will continue to run downstairs in
So party the night away with style from
Queen’s Court, U-pop in The Loft will
11pm to 3am upstairs in The Loft.
continue the same vibrant, hectic energy
of Leeds’ Thursdays and offer the same Queens Court, Lower Briggate,
excellent value for money customers are Leeds
used to. Tel: 0113 245 9449
58 October 2008
Back to school
The summer season might be grinding to a
halt in Blackpool but not so for the thriving
gay scene. At the heart of the action lies the
Flamingo Nightclub and each week scores of
gay clubbers flock to the club for a party.
The Autumn see’s the launch of School Disco.
On the third Friday of each month the club
reminisces yesteryear with some highly camp
and memorable tunes (that probably weren’t
camp back then) and some real “I so forget
about this song” moments. There will be free
old school sweets, Ice Pops and plenty of fun
to be had.
The Foam party has proven a huge success
throughout the summer but will come to an
end on the first Friday of October so drag your
friends over to say goodbye to this event in style
as it takes its annual hiatus.
For more info visit flamingoonline.co.uk
60 October 2008
Statement from
the Cardiff Pride
organisers
It was with great regret that we were
forced to cancel Cardiff Pride at noon
on Friday 5th September.
It followed one of the wettest weeks on record with non-
stop torrential rain falling day after day virtually all week long.
Nobody could have missed the TV, radio and newspaper
reports about the battering that Wales endured during the
storms. Many people and organisations including Cardiff
Council, tried in vain to help us salvage the event in the
park but in the end there was absolutely NO way Cardiff
Pride could go ahead on Coopers Field on Saturday.
Unlike the water, six months of planning went down the
plug hole.
On a health and safety level the site could not have
accommodated the anticipated tens of thousands of
visitors and everyone, including the pride organisers
accepted the fact that Cardiff Pride 2008 would have to
fall victim to the weather.
Instead, with the help of the council and other authorities
it was agreed to scale up the street party planned for
Churchill Way over the weekend - where many of the
main stage and cabaret artists were invited to perform.
Many people worked throughout the night to get the
street party set up in time so it could open earlier on the
Saturday... we are indebted to them all.
Although Cardiff Pride was cancelled many people still
made the trek to Cardiff and partied in the street party
and other city centre gay venues. This enabled the
thousands of revellers to have a great time - regardless
of the weather. Ironically, Saturday proved fine and fairly
warm, with nothing more than a short shower to dampen
their enthusiasm.
62 October 2008
Sauna Guide
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64 October 2008
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Hope
Ali’s OK
By Spadger
Now the kids have gone back to school

me and my mates more or less have the
place to ourselves. Not that we use this
park that much but I’m back here now
cos Ali has gone off to the hozi. He was
just trickin’ - not thinkin’. He bailed out
pretty bad, poor bugger, his knackers will
have been smashed as he hit that rail.
The kicker dint give him enough air as the
wheels just clipped the fuckers and sent
him flying. Mind you the follow through
as he nutted the corner made quite a
red mess. Called an ambo as he was out
cold poor sod. Timbo has gone with him,
Barney has gone home and I’m left here
on my own.
Hope Ali’s OK
Looks like he’s lost one of his Vans…. I

haven’t told Ali this but… well… he really
fuckin’ turns me on - big time. He’s half
Indian and half English and as well as
some pretty intense eyes… he’s fuckin’
stunnin’. All four of us just board non-stop
‘cept when we take a little smoke round
at Timbo’s. He’s the only one who has a
place of his own… none of us has a job
yet. Three years since we left school and
still no work… not that we’re looking…
‘though Ali’s under pressure to work for his
dad but he says he can’t be arsed. I love
his accent… yer that’s another thing ‘bout
him… he makes me laff with his accent
and jokes… and he has his boxers… fuck
let me tell you… he’s got us all wearing
these fuckin’ camo things… I think they
were from his dad’s shop… I wouldn’t
have been found dead in ‘em but… well…
Ali looks pretty cool so we all have ‘em
now.
I hope Ali’s OK. I think Ali knows. He just seems to know every needs sortin’. I’m going dizzy just sniffing Ali in.
fuckin’ thing… I hope he does cos that way… I’d really go for Ali fuckin’ my butt as he shoves
I’d better take Ali’s Vans… god they fuckin’ I don’t have to pretend wiv him. Fuck… just both his Vans in my face… fuck that would be
reek. Weeks and months of sweat and think… if he did know… and me and him could cool. Filling me arse as he fills my head. Fuckin’
that thing fuckin stinks. Fuck… but it’s get together???? Oh man that would be just… Cool. I know he has a hell of a dick on him…
Ali’s smell. Oh yeah… a bit of Ali to myself. Christ my cock his throbbing like mad… I can feel cos I’ve snuk a look. He doesn’t care… his arse
Jesus... I’m getting a stiffy just smelling the blood… ohh… that feels… is pretty solid as well. Fuck man… I need to
his stink… fuck I’m a right perv… but shoot pretty soon. Ohhh fuck Ali… you fuckin’…
mmmmm. I’ll just grab my dick and give it His trainer smells horny… I wouldn’t mind licking fuck God. Shove your dick right up me as I sniff
a playful… mmmmmm… that feels horny. his toes… or his arse… or anything of his. Ohhhh your… oohhhh… ahhhh… eeeerrrrghgh. Fuck I
Breathing in Ali and slowly wankin’ my fuck man… this is too much … my piss slit is didn’t…. eerghgh… expect that… ooohhhh that
cock… just feels right. Fuck… if the others leakin’… Jeeese… what a feelin’. Ahh fuck Ali feels good.
could see me now they’d think I was… I hope you’re alright. The paramedic said he
well I am… but they don’t need to know. should be and Timbo is gonna let me know if owt Hope Ali’s OK.
72 October 2008
B e a uty
é
simon & beyonc
Find more out about Simon or

and the
freaks
message him your problems at
www.myspace.com/simonsavidge
Simon says …
Dear Simon
I think my boyfriend is stealing from me. Every so often, for the last couple
of months, I will think I had a tenner in my pocket or will notice I have spent
Bruised Egos
twenty quid out of my wallet I can’t account for. The odd thing is that if he
wanted to borrow the money then he could just ask and I would lend it to
him, it’s the sneaky side of it that I don’t like maybe he has some sort of
psychosis I am unaware of, which also worries me slightly. What should I do?
Dean, Nottingham
Dear Dean, I was recently talking to a guy pulled out. Great! Michael thought. He’s
I wouldn’t start worrying about psychosis just yet, I don’t think that is going going to change positions! But he didn’t.
who couldn’t stop old men He’d cum already.
to help anyone and you may start wondering if you are living with some kind
of strange creature and really this sounds like someone who is just being from chatting him up. He then
When he took Michael to the train station
sneaky. In any relationship you should be able to talk about any issues you suggested I should write an the next day, he turned and asked, ‘So
have including being strapped for cash; however taking money off someone article about it. when will I see you again?’
is theft. I would also have a look at what this says for your long term future,
if he isn’t telling you he is taking money what else might he be leaving out or ‘So you’ve read my column?’ I asked.
‘I don’t think you will, darling!’ Michael
keeping from you? said, before he turned and walked away.
‘You’re a writer?’ he asked.
Dear Simon, That he’d asked me to write about Clearly the guy had been so confident he
I think my boyfriend has become addicted to porn. He literally watches the him when he didn’t even think I was a was the shit, he’d failed to realise he was,
stuff from when he comes home to when he falls asleep on the sofa. The writer made me laugh. Obviously this um, a shit.
other odd thing about it is that he simply watches it and nothing else; he kid thought he was so interesting he
doesn’t even get horny with it. He’s not going out very much if at all, and our expected random strangers who’d never But this isn’t all. There are the gay men
sex life has gone down the toilet. I asked him if he wants an open relationship put pen to paper to become so inspired who think ignoring you on a date is hot,
and he asked me why I would think that. I am finding the whole thing a little they’d become flourishing Wordsworths and that they’re so gorgeous you’ll never
bit worrying. overnight. And it got me thinking: are be able to resist, only being left stunned
Austin, Manchester gays really that self-absorbed? when you leave them at the dinner table
with the bill. Of course, they’ll also have
Dear Austin, A friend of mine (let’s call him Michael)
been so busy fawning over their own
This is sounding like a slight obsession and your are right to be concerned, travelled all the way to Manchester for a
reflections in the cutlery, they won’t
however I think this addiction sounds like it could have deeper routes than shag. The guy spent all evening watching
have noticed the lobster thermidor and
simply being an excessive appetite for porn. Sometimes when people are what he wanted to watch on TV, doing
champagne you’ve ordered and which
depressed or have a lot on they can become fixated with anything (from what he wanted to do, and playing the
they’ll now have to pay for.
chocolate to spending money) as it gives them a high. I think the best thing is games he wanted to play on the Wii.
to seek advice from a doctor on his behalf, talk to him, be honest and upfront Then he just disappeared, content to There are also the guys who walk into the
without sounding like you are attacking him and hopefully it will all unfold. spend ages in the bathroom without even club with a giant trout pout and sashay
telling Michael. When he came out, he their hips like they own the place, only
Dear Simon, got into bed and waited for my friend to to be utterly stunned when the barmen
I am worried about how large I am, sadly I don’t mean in the trouser join him. When Michael wasn’t there in won’t respond to their finger clicks and
department though I am perfectly happy with what I have. I went out on the five minutes (presumably gay men are hand banging on the bar. Remember:
scene to a party and there were lots of people saying how fat they were and psychic when it comes to sex), he called screaming and hurling straws and
how they needed to loose weight and I am twice the size of some of them. It my friend into the room like a servant who napkins is not an acceptable way of
makes me wonder if I am ugly and even obese. should know better. ordering drinks. Neither is, ‘Serve me now
bitch! Don’t you know who I am?’
Anon The sex was equally self-absorbed. The
guy lubed his dick up and readied it for
Dear Anon, penetration, before my friend pointed out Of course, all of the above goes for
Problems like this really make me angry, not with you but with insensitive and he wasn’t wearing a condom. anyone other than me. I have to be a
vain gay men. Everyone would like to change something about themselves bitch so I can research my column and
unless they are exceptionally lucky or exceptionally arrogant. The facts are ‘Oh, yeah, I didn’t think.’ bring you such sage wisdom. If I was
Beyoncé
that everyone has different metabolisms and different genetics and so people good boy, what would you stand to learn
No, he did think—he just expected to then?
will be different. On the gay scene there is in some circles a major thing
get away with barebacking without even
about being the size of a celery stick and if you wanna be that’s fine, however
asking. So Michael watched him put
there is also a circle where the bigger you are the better. The thing is… are
on the rubber and slid it inside. The guy
you happy with yourself, and if you are sod the lot of them, don’t give into
wanted, of course, to do it in his favourite
pressure as it may seem attractive but you could be seriously miserable.
position, with Michael face down in the
Enjoy your difference.
pillow and getting very little pleasure.
xxx
Luckily, a minute and a half later, the guy
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Feature | Stars
Philip has just started to write detailed monthly

travel horoscopes in addition to his existing
content of weekly love & gay horoscopes, daily
horoscopes and weekly & monthly in depth
scripts for phone lines.
Aries (Mar21/Apr20)
It’s time to say goodbye to someone who has been
You want rid of unpleasantness and if the only way
to achieve some semblance of harmony is to avoid
a certain person, maybe some space from each
Libra (Sept24/Oct23)
other is just what this partnership needs. Focus on
important in your life. There will be sadness linked
casual friendships and community activities these
to this parting but it’s a relationship that wasn’t
next few weeks. It certainly won’t do your closest
going to be forever. Some friendships are not
relationship any harm.
You might wish you could answer all the always meant to last; enjoy them while you can but
questions being asked of you now but

as you change, your associations will also change.
Scorpio (Oct24/Jan20)
Illustrations: Oliver Weiss/oweiss.com
You may regret some decisions made this month

you need to be honest and admit you but you can’t let remorse take over. You need to It is not a good idea to let your feelings get in
move past it and know your mistakes are part of
can’t. This month, trying to bluff your way life’s learning experiences.
the way of your thinking. In emotional situations,
calm yourself and activate your brain. Remind
through some situations won’t impress
anyone. Those who are knowledgeable
will soon realise you don’t know what
Taurus (Apr21/May21)
Tread carefully this October if you feel your boyfriend
yourself of the mistakes you made in the past by
responding first and thinking about it later! It might
seem as if you are holding yourself aloof when
talking to others but this may be the only way to
isn’t being attentive enough. Demand too much
you’re talking about. Honesty is the best attention and he could resent you for it. To get the
communicate your feelings clearly and calmly. Joint
finances or shared resources could create some
policy in both your professional and social kind of affection and consideration you like best he
problems for you this month as you try to get some
life. Don’t be antsy when you meet up needs to be motivated to give this without being
aspects of your life in order.
asked. If you know what inspires and excites him, try
Sagittarius (Nov23/Dec21)
against bossy types. Stay composed and to provide for his needs over the weeks ahead. He will
this will help to soothe and smooth the then do the same for you. Rather than putting him on
edge, make your relationship fun for him and for you. Your past experiences will be a powerful voice in
mood around you.
Celebrity Libra
Gemini (May22/June21)
There should be plenty opportunity to have fun over
the choices face this month. Through drawing on
past lessons you will know you are making good
decisions. It might be hard to get your partner to
understand your point of view at times. He may be
24/09 F.Scott Fitzgerald the weeks ahead. The only thing to watch is not to
looking at some issues from a completely different
overspend. It could be a rather expensive time if
25/09 Catherine Zeta-Jones angle and it might seem as if he is not getting the
you just fritter money away. If you have a talent for
26/09 Olivia Newton-John picture at all. For that reason, you must try to be
writing, poetry, art or some other form of expression,
27/09 Avril Lavigne extra sensitive in your closest relationships.
you will get a chance to make use of this natural gift
28/09 Gwyneth Paltrow
29/09 Jerry Lee Lewis
later in the month. An older friend or relative will help
you find a solution to a spiritual puzzle. Capricorn (Dec22/Jan20)
Cancer (Jun22/Jul23)
30/09 Martina Hingis Those you hold nearest and dearest to your heart will
01/10 Julie Andrews be highlighted in October. Friends and loved-ones
02/10 Sting want your opinion and they will be seeking you out for
Correcting a past mistake will make you feel slightly
your company. If you’re feeling more introverted than
03/10 Gwen Stefani better even if you won’t ever forget some things
normal, this sudden bout of popularity could be a bit
04/10 Anne Rice that have been said. Although a problem has been
challenging. Try to relax and enjoy your relationships.
05/10 Guy Pearce resolved, it might seem as if not everything has
You can expect a stimulating exchange of ideas and
been put right; only learned from. You will be a
06/10 Britt Ekland you might benefit from a generous offer.
wiser and more understanding person as a result of
Aquarius (Jan21/Feb19)
07/10 Simon Cowell this month’s interactions and this will help you make
08/10 Matt Damon better choices in the future. A friend will be grateful
09/10 Sharon Osbourne for your sensitivity; you understand everything we A possessive friend or lover will not understand why
10/10 Mya do is part of life and living it, even the mistakes! you feel a little restless and in need of more personal
Leo (Jul24/Aug23)
11/10 Dawn French freedom. You deserve a couple of days on your own
12/10 Hugh Jackman but their objections make you feel guilty. You need to
gather all the willpower you can muster and insist on
13/10 Margaret Thatcher An offer or proposition needs careful consideration
getting your own way this October. To fall in with other
14/10 Usher before you say yes or no. Once you have identified
people’s wishes will be giving them an advantage as
15/10 Sarah Ferguson the problems and difficulties you may encounter in
they will think they can dictate to you in the future.
the future, you will feel confident about going ahead
Pisces (Fed20/Mar20)
16/10 Oscar Wilde fully aware of all you are letting yourself in for. If only
17/10 Eminem you felt as sure about how to deal with a difficult
18/10 Jean-Claude Van Damne partnership matter. You know what you should be It won’t be easy to sustain a long-distance
19/10 Divine doing to resolve the problem only it might feel as if relationship even though you are determined to
20/10 Viggo Mortensen you aren’t executing the solution very well. give it a try. There will be occasions, this month,
21/10 Carrie Fisher
22/10 Catherine Deneuve
23/10 “Weird” Al Yankovic
Virgo (Aug24/Sept23)
You could be confused about what a friend or
when you won’t know what’s going on in each
other’s life even with regular emails, text messages
and phone calls. You need to know you can trust a
partner you don’t see very often. You could never
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Melissa Totten

Publisher: Terry George

Astrologer: Philip Garcia

Vest £10 - Trunks £10 - Briefs £8

• She loved to play vicious or evil and dark female

• She used her cigarette holder wherever she went

• “I think Bette Davis would probably have been

• She married four times and in one case was

Saturday November 29th at 8.00pm

Tom goes Scouse

Shoot - Pete Tong - so we can nick his spot on

ALBUM OF THE MONTH

4BOB DYLAN 4JAZZIE B 4NIGEL OF 4ARMAND VAN 4NELL BRYDEN

They Ain’t Breaking

SINGLE OF THE MONTH

4BASSHUNTER 4SASH! FT. 4NATTY 4LUIGI MASI 4THE TOUGH

4Back To 95 - Back To 4Bargrooves: Disco Heat 4Armin Only - Imagine

4Ultimate Isaac Hayes – 4Mariah Carey The

Competition Time Turn to page 74 for entry details

The Wonderful World of:

Josh Hartnett – Ever since we saw New Weight Lifting

David Beckham – Okay, he’s a bit

George Michael – Your mother

Christian Ronaldo – He can’t

Ricky Whittle – Better known as

Keanu Reaves – This Hawaiian-

Wentworth Miller – Is he gay? Isn’t

Robbie Williams – Sure, he’s a

Brent Everett – With a schlong like

Michael Douglas – Just to

3Looks like an Angel

with Girls Aloud

Competition Time Turn to page 74 for entry details

TERRY GEORGE TELLIN’ STORIES

MR GAY UK: The

Echo Beach boys Christian and Ed

They announce the runners up – 3rd place Mr

Assisting migrant gay men

The 5 least gay

Gay Britain many European countries that don’t come

His latest book Eltonography – A Life In Pictures

5Girls Aloud 5The Moanin’ 5Marc Bolan – Born

5Ghost Lovers 5Leathermen 5All Balls and Glitter

5How To Lose Friends And

Actress Lindsay Lohan has slammed U.S. vice

Former Star Trek actor George Takei has wed longtime

Welsh actress Catherine Zeta-Jones has been tipped

Director Gus Van Sant will be honoured at New York’s

Michael Douglas is set to play Liberace in a biopic 5House Bunny

Pamela Anderson had to tell her pre-teen sons all

Bangkok Love Story is a very

As the Love Story unfolds…

Was the wrestling around in the

5Chop Suey 5East Side Story 5Dog Tags 5Eraserhead

Giving good head

3Showered 3Marvel Gel THE MINT

Successful distance athletes typically have

5Lights, Camera, Action!

Every ‘T’ tells a story

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