LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE

JOHN BARTH Lost in the Funhouse

For whom is the funhouse fun? Perhaps for o!ers" For Am#rose it is a place of fear and confusion. He has $ome to the seashore with his fami % for the ho i&a%' the occasion of their visit is Independence Day, the most important secular holiday of the United States of America. A sin( e strai(ht un&er ine is the manus$ript mar) for ita i$ t%pe' which in turn is the printe& e*ui!a ent to ora emphasis of wor&s an& phrases as we as the $ustomar% t%pe for tit es of $omp ete wor)s' not to mention" Ita i$s are a so emp o%e&' in fi$tion stories espe$ia %' for +outsi&e', intrusi!e' or artifi$ia !oi$es' su$h as ra&io announ$ements' the te-ts of te e(rams an& newspaper arti$ es' et $etera" The% shou & #e use& sparingly. If passa(es ori(ina % in roman t%pe are ita i$i.e& #% someone repeatin( them' it/s $ustomar% to a$)now e&(e the fa$t" Italics mine. Am#rose was +at that aw)war& a(e", His !oi$e $ame out hi(h0pit$he& as a $hi &/s if he et himse f (et $arrie& awa%1 to #e on the safe si&e' therefore' he mo!e& an& spo)e with deliberate calm an& adult gravity. Ta )in( so#er % of unimportant or irre e!ant matters an& istenin( $ons$ious % to the soun& of %our own !oi$e are usefu ha#its for maintainin( $ontro in this &iffi$u t inter!a " n route to O$ean 2it% he sat in the #a$) seat of the fami % $ar with his #rother Peter' a(e fifteen' an& 3a(&a 4 56 a(e fourteen' a prett% (ir an& e-*uisite %oun( a&%' who i!e& not far from them on B 5 Street in the town of 7 5' 3ar% an&" Initia s' # an)s' or #oth were often su#stitute& for proper names in nineteenth0$entur% fi$tion to enhan$e the i usion of rea it%" It is as if the author fe t it ne$essar% to &e ete the names for reasons of ta$t or e(a ia#i it%" Interestin( %' as with other aspe$ts of rea ism' it is an illusion that is #ein( enhan$e&' #% pure % artifi$ia means" Is it i)e %' &oes it !io ate the prin$ip e of !erisimi itu&e' that a thirteen0%ear0o & #o% $ou & ma)e su$h a sophisti$ate& o#ser!ation? A (ir of fourteen is the psychological coeval of a #o% of fifteen or si-teen1 a thirteen0%ear0o & #o%' therefore' e!en one pre$o$ious in some other respe$ts' mi(ht #e three %ears her emotional !unior. Thri$e a %ear 5 on 3emoria ' In&epen&en$e' an& La#or 7a%s 5 the fami % !isits O$ean 2it% for the afternoon an& e!enin(" 8hen Am#rose an& Peter/s father was their a(e' the e-$ursion was ma&e #% train' as mentione& in the no!e "he #$nd %arallel #% John 7os Passos" 3an% fami ies from the same nei(h#orhoo& use& to tra!e to(ether' with &epen&ent re ati!es an& often with Ne(ro ser!ants1 s$hoo fu s of $hi &ren swarme& throu(h the rai wa% $ars1 e!er%one share& e!er%one e se/s 3ar% an& frie& $hi$)en' 9ir(inia ham' &e!i e& e((s' potato sa a&' #eaten #is$uits' i$e& tea" Nowa&a%s :that is' in ;<00 ' the %ear of our stor%= the >ourne% is ma&e #% automo#i e 5 more $omforta# % an& *ui$) % thou(h without the e-tra fun thou(h without the camaraderie of a (enera e-$ursion" It/s a part of the &eterioration of Ameri$an ife' their father &e$ ares1 Un$ e ?ar supposes that when the #o%s ta)e their fami ies to O$ean 2it% for the ho i&a%s the%/ f % in Auto(iros" Their mother' sittin( in the mi&& e of the front seat i)e 3a(&a in the se$on&' on % with her arms on the seat0#a$) #ehin& the men/s shou &ers' wou &n/t want the (oo& o & &a%s #a$) a(ain' the steamin( trains an& stuff% on( &resses1 on the other han& she $an &o without Auto(iros' too' if she has to #e$ome a (ran&mother to f % in them" 7es$ription of ph%si$a appearan$e an& mannerisms is one of se!era stan&ar&

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE C metho&s of $hara$teri.ation use& #% writers of fi$tion" It is a so important to +)eep the senses operatin(,1 when a &etai from one of the fi!e senses' sa% !isua ' is +$rosse&, with a &etai from another' sa% au&itor%' the rea&er/s ima(ination is oriente& to the s$ene' perhaps un$ons$ious %" This pro$e&ure ma% he $ompare& to the wa% sur!e%ors an& na!i(ators &etermine their positions #% two or more $ompass #earin(s' a pro$ess )nown as trian(u ation" The #rown hair on Am#rose/s mother/s forearms ( eame& in the sun i)e" Thou(h ri(ht0han&e&' she too) her eft arm from the seat #a$) to press the &ash#oar& $i(ar i(hter for Un$ e ?ar " 8hen the ( ass #ea& in its han& e ( owe& re&' the i(hter was rea&% for use" The sme of Un$ e ?ar /s $i(ar smo)e remin&e& one of" The fra(ran$e of the o$ean $ame stron( to the pi$ni$ (roun& where the% a wa%s stoppe& for un$h' two mi es in an& from O$ean 2it% Ha!in( to pause for a fu hour a most within soun& of the #rea)ers was &iffi$u t for Peter an& Am#rose when the% were %oun(er1 e!en at their present a(e it was not eas% to )eep their anti$ipation' stimulated by the briny spume, from turnin( into short temper" The Irish author James Jo%$e' in his unusua no!e entit e& Ulysses, now a!ai a# e in this $ountr% uses the a&>e$ti!es snot&green an& scrotum& tightening to &es$ri#e the sea" 9isua ' au&itor% ta$ti e' o fa$tor%' (ustator% Peter an& Am#rose/s father' whi e steerin( their # a$) ;<@A LaSa e se&an with one han&' $ou & with the other remo!e the first $i(arette from a white pa$) of Lu$)% Stri)es an&' more remar)a# %' i(ht it with a mat$h forefin(ere& from its #oo) an& thum#e& a(ainst the f int paper without #ein( &eta$he&" The mat$h#oo) $o!er mere % a&!ertise& U"S" 8ar Bon&s an& Stamps" A fine metaphor' simi e' or other fi(ure of spee$h' in a&&ition to its o#!ious +first0or&er, re e!an$e to the thin( it &es$ri#es' wi #e seen upon ref e$tion to ha!e a se$on& or&er of si(nifi$an$eB it ma% #e &rawn from the milieu of the a$tion' for e-amp e' or #e parti$u ar % appropriate to the sensi#i it% of the narrator' e!en hintin( to the rea&er thin(s of whi$h the narrator is unaware1 or it ma% $ast further an& su#t er i(hts upon the thin(s it &es$ri#es' sometimes ironi$a % *ua if%in( the more e!i&ent sense of the $omparison" To sa% that Am#rose/s an& Peter/s mother was pretty is to a$$omp ish nothin(1 the rea&er ma% a$)now e&(e the proposition' #ut his ima(ination is not en(a(e&" Besi&es' 3a(&a was a so prett%' %et in an a to(ether &ifferent wa%" A thou(h she i!e& on B 5 Street she ha& !er% (oo& manners an& &i& #etter than a!era(e in s$hoo " Her fi(ure was !er% we &e!e ope& for her a(e" Her ri(ht han& a% $asua % on the p ush upho ster% of the seat' !er% near Am#rose/s eft e(' on whi$h his own han& reste&" The spa$e #etween their e(s' #etween her ri(ht an& his eft e(' was out of the ine of si(ht of an%one sittin( on the other si&e of 3a(&a' as we as an%one ( an$in( into the rear0!iew mirror" Un$ e ?ar /s fa$e resem# e& Peter/s 5 rather' !i$e !ersa" Both ha& &ar) hair an& e%es' short hus)% statures' &eep !oi$es" 3a(&a/s eft han& was pro#a# % in a simi ar position on her eft si&e" The #o%s/ father is &iffi$u t to &es$ri#e1 no parti$u ar feature of his appearan$e or manner stoo& out" He wore ( asses an& was prin$ipa of a T 2ount% (ra&e s$hoo " Un$ e ?ar was a masonr% $ontra$tor" A thou(h Peter must ha!e )nown as we as Am#rose that the atter' #e$ause of his position in the $ar' wou & #e first to see the e e$tri$a towers of the power p ant at 9 5' the ha fwa% point of their trip' he eane& forwar& an& s i(ht % towar& the $enter of the $ar an& preten&e& to #e oo)in( for them throu(h the f at pinewoo&s an& tu$)ahoe $ree)s a on( the hi(hwa%" For as on( as the #o%s $ou & remem#er' +Loo)in( for the Towers, ha& #een a feature of the first ha f of their e-$ursions to O$ean 2it%' + oo)in( for the stan&pipe, of the se$on&" Thou(h the (ame was $hi &ish' their mother preser!e& the

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE @ tra&ition of rewar&in( the first to see the Towers with a $an&%0#ar or pie$e of fruit" She insiste& now that 3a(&a p a% the (ame1 the pri.e' she sai&' was +somethin( har& to (et nowa&a%s", Am#rose &e$i&e& not to >oin in1 he sat far #a$) in his seat" 3a(&a' i)e Peter' eane& forwar&" Two sets of straps were &is$erni# e throu(h the shou &ers of her sun &ress1 the insi&e ri(ht one' a #rassiere0strap' was fastene& or shortene& with a sma safet% pin" The ri(ht armpit of her &ress' presuma# % the eft as we ' was &amp with perspiration" The simp e strate(% for #ein( first to esp% the Towers' whi$h Am#rose ha& un&erstoo& #% the a(e of four' was to sit on the ri(ht0han& si&e of the $ar" 8hoe!er sat there' howe!er' ha& a so to put up with the worst of the sun' an& so Am#rose' without mentionin( the matter' $hose sometimes the one an& sometimes the other" Not impossi# % Peter ha& ne!er $au(ht on to the tri$)' or thou(ht that his #rother ha&n/t simp % #e$ause Am#rose on o$$asion preferre& sha&e to a Ba#% Ruth or tan(erine" The sha&e0sun situation &i&n/t app % to the front seat' owin( to the win&shie &1 if an%thin( the &ri!er (ot more sun' sin$e the person on the passen(er si&e not on % was sha&owe& #e ow #% the &oor an& &ash#oar& #ut mi(ht swin( &own his sun !isor a the wa% too" +Is that them?, 3a(&a as)e&" Am#rose/s mother tease& the #o%s for ettin( 3a(&a win' insinuatin( that +some#o&% Dha&E a (ir frien&", Peter an& Am#rose/s father rea$he& a on( thin arm a$ross their mother to #utt his $i(arette in the &ash#oar& ashtra%' un&er the i(hter" The pri.e this time for seein( the Towers first was a #anana" Their mother #estowe& it after $hi&in( their father for wastin( a ha f0smo)e& $i(arette when e!er%thin( was so s$ar$e" 3a(&a' to ta)e the pri.e' mo!e& her han& from so near Am#rose/s that he $ou & ha!e tou$he& it as thou(h a$$i&enta %" She offere& to share the pri.e' thin(s i)e that were so har& to fin&1 #ut e!er%one insiste& it was hers a one" Am#rose/s mother san( an iam#i$ trimeter $oup et from a popu ar son(' feminine % rh%me&B

+8hat/s (oo& is in the Arm%1 8hat/s eft wi ne!er harm me" Un$ e ?ar tappe& his $i(ar ash out the !enti ator win&ow1 some parti$ es were su$)e& #% the s ipstream #a$) into the $ar throu(h the rear win&ow on the passen(er si&e" 3a(&a &emonstrate& her a#i it% to ho & a #anana in one han& an& pee it with her teeth" She sti sat forwar&1 Am#rose pushe& his ( asses #a$) onto the #ri&(e of his nose with his eft han&' whi$h he then ne( i(ent % et fa to the seat $ushion imme&iate % #ehin& her" He e!en permitte& the sin( e hair' (o &' on the se$on& >oint of his thum# to #rush the fa#ri$ of her s)irt" Shou & she ha!e sat #a$) at that instant' his han& wou & ha!e #een $au(ht un&er her" P ush upho ster% pri$) es un$omforta# % throu(h (a#ar&ine s a$)s in the Ju % sun" The fun$tion of the beginning of a stor% is to intro&u$e the prin$ipa $hara$ters' esta# ish their initia re ationships' set the s$ene for the main a$tion' e-pose the #a$)(roun& of the situation if ne$essar%" p ant motifs an& foresha&owin(s where appropriate' an& initiate the first $omp i$ation or whate!er of the +risin( a$tion", A$tua %' if one ima(ines a stor% $a e& +The Funhouse', or +Lost in the Funhouse', the &etai s of the &ri!e to O$ean 2it% &on/t seem espe$ia % re e!ant" The beginning shou & re$ount the e!ents #etween Am#rose/s first si(ht of the funhouse ear % in the afternoon an& his enterin( it with 3a(&a an& Peter in the e!enin(" The middle wou & narrate a re e!ant e!ents from the time he (oes in to the time he oses his wa%1 mi&& es ha!e the &ou# e an& $ontra&i$tor%

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE J fun$tion of &e a%in( the $ ima- whi e at the same time preparin( the rea&er for it an& fet$hin( him to it" Then the ending wou & te what Am#rose &oes whi e he/s ost' how he fina % fin&s his wa% out' an& what e!er%#o&% ma)es of the e-perien$e" So far there/s #een no rea &ia o(ue' !er% itt e sensor% &etai ' an& nothin( in the wa% of a theme. An& a on( time has (one #% a rea&% without an%thin( happenin(1 it ma)es a person won&er" 8e ha!en/t e!en rea$he& O$ean 2it% %etB we wi ne!er (et out of the funhouse" The more $ ose % an author i&entifies with the narrator' itera % or metaphori$a %' the ess a&!isa# e it is' as a ru e' to use the first0person narrati!e !iewpoint" On$e three %ears pre!ious % the %oun( peop e aforementioned p a%e& Ni((ers an& 3asters in the #a$)%ar&1 when it was Am#rose/s turn to #e 3aster an& theirs to #e Ni((ers Peter ha& to (o ser!e his e!enin( papers1 Am#rose was afrai& to punish 3a(&a a one' #ut she e& him to the whitewashe& Torture 2ham#er #etween the woo&she& an& the pri!% in the S a!es Fuarters1 there she )ne t sweatin( amon( #am#oo ra)es an& &ust% 3ason >ars' p ea&in( % em#ra$e& his )nees' an& whi e #ees &rone& in the atti$e as if on an or&inar% summer afternoon' pur$hase& $ emen$% at a surprisin( pri$e set #% herse f" 7ou#t ess she remem#ere& nothin( of this e!ent1 Am#rose on the other han& seeme& una# e to for(et the east &etai of his ife" He e!en re$a e& how' stan&in( #esi&e himse f with awe& impersona it% in the ree)% heat' he/& stare& the whi e at an empt% $i(ar #o- in whi$h Un$ e ?ar )ept stone0$uttin( $hise sB #eneath the wor&s l %roducto, a aure e&' oose0 to(a/& a&% re(ar&e& the sea from a mar# e #en$h1 #esi&e her' for(otten" or not %et turne& to' was a fi!e0strin(e& %re" Her $hin repose& on the #a$) of her ri(ht han&1 her eft &epen&e& ne( i(ent % from the #en$h0arm" The ower ha f of s$ene an& a&% was pee e& awa%1 the wor&s EGA3INE7 BH 5 were in)e& there into the woo&" Nowa&a%s $i(ar #o-es are ma&e of paste#oar&" Am#rose won&ere& what 3a(&a wou & ha!e &one' Am#rose won&ere& what 3a(&a wou & &o when she sat #a$) on his han& as he reso !e& she shou &" Be an(r% 3a)e a teasin( >o)e of it" 4i!e no si(n at a " For a on( time she eane& forwar&' p a%in( $ow0po)er with Peter a(ainst Un$ e ?ar an& 3other an& wat$hin( for the first si(n of O$ean 2it%" At near % the same instant' pi$ni$ (roun& an& O$ean 2it% stan&pipe ho!e into !iew1 an Amo$o fi in( station on their si&e of the roa& $ost 3other an& Un$ e ?ar fift% $ows an& the (ame1 3a(&a #oun$e& #a$)' $ appin( her ri(ht han& on 3other/s ri(ht arm1 Am#rose mo!e& $ ear +in the ni$) of time"II At this rate our hero' at this rate our prota(onist wi remain in the funhouse fore!er" Narrati!e or&inari % $onsists of a ternatin( &ramati.ation an& summari.ation" One s%mptom of ner!ous tension' para&o-i$a %' is repeate& an& !io ent %awnin(1 neither Peter nor 3a(&a nor Un$ e ?ar nor 3other rea$te& in this manner" A thou(h the% were no on(er sma $hi &ren' Peter an& Am#rose were ea$h (i!en a &o ar to spen& on #oar&wa ) amusements in a&&ition to what mone% of their own the%/& #rou(ht a on(" 3a(&a too' thou(h she proteste& she ha& amp e spen&in( mone%" The #o%s/ mother ma&e a itt e s$ene out of &istri#utin( the #i s1 she preten&e& that her sons an& 3a(&a were sma $hi &ren an& $autione& them not to spen& the sum too *ui$) % or in one p a$e" 3a(&a promise& with a merr% au(h an&' ha!in( #oth han&s free' too) the #i with her eft" Peter au(he& a so an& p e&(e& in a fa setto to #e a (oo& #o%" His imitation of a $hi & was not $ e!er" The #o%s/ father was ta an& thin' #a &in(' fair0$omp e-ione&" Assertions of that sort are not effe$ti!e1 the rea&er ma% a$)now e&(e the proposition' #ut" 8e shou & #e mu$h farther a on( than we are1 somethin( has (one wron(1 not mu$h of the pre iminar% ram# in( seems re e!ant" Het e!er%one #e(ins in the same p a$e1 how is it that most (o a on( without &iffi$u t% #ut a few ose their wa%?

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE L +Sta% out from un&er the #oar&wa )', Un$ e ?ar (row e& from the si&e of his mouth" The #o%s/ mother pushe& his shou &er in moc' annoyance. The% were a stan&in( #efore Fat 3a% the Lau(hin( La&% who a&!ertise& the funhouse" Lar(er than ife' Fat 3a% me$hani$a % shoo)' ro$)e& on her hee s' s appe& her thi(hs whi e re$or&e& au(hter 5 uproarious' fema e 5 $ame amp ifie& from a hi&&en ou&spea)er" It $hu$) e&' whee.e&' wept1 trie& in !ain to $at$h its #reath1 tittere&' (roane&' e-p o&e& rau$ous an& anew" Hou $ou &n/t hear it without au(hin( %ourse f' no matter how %ou fe t" Father $ame #a$) from ta )in( to a 2oast04uar&sman on &ut% an& reporte& that the surf was spoi e& with $ru&e oi from tan)ers re$ent % torpe&oe& offshore" Lumps of it' &iffi$u t to remo!e' ma&e tarr% ti&e ines on the #ea$h an& stu$) on swimmers" 3an% #athe& in the surf ne!erthe ess an& $ame out spe$) e&1 others pai& to use a muni$ipa poo an& on % sun#athe& on the #ea$h" 8e wou & &o the atter" 8e wou & &o the atter" 8e wou & &o the atter" Un&er the #oar&wa )' mat$h#oo) $o!ers' (rain% other thin(s" 8hat is the stor%/s theme? Am#rose is i " He perspires in the &ar) passa(es' $an&ie& app es0on0a0sti$)' &e i$ious0 oo)in(' &isappointin( to eat" Funhouses nee& men/s an& a&ies/ rooms at inter!a s" Others perhaps ha!e a so !omite& in $orners an& $orri&ors1 ma% e!en ha!e ha& #owe mo!ements ia# e to #e steppe& in in the &ar)" The wor& fuc' su((ests su$tion an&Kor an&Kor f atu en$e" 3other an& Father1 (ran&mothers an& (ran&fathers on #oth si&es1 (reat0(ran&mothers an& (reat0(ran&fathers on four si&es' et $etera" 2ount a (eneration as thirt% %earsB in appro-imate % the %ear when Lor& Ba timore was (rante& $harter to the pro!in$e of 3ar% an& #% 2har es I' fi!e hun&re& twe !e women 5 En( ish' 8e sh' Ba!arian' Swiss 5 of e!er% $ ass an& $hara$ter' re$ei!e& into themse !es the penises the intromittent or(ans of fi!e hun&re& twe !e men' &itto' in e!er% $ir$umstan$e an& posture' to $on$ei!e the fi!e hun&re& twe !e an$estors an& the two hun&re& fift%0sian$estors of the et $etera et $etera et $etera et $etera et $etera et $etera et $etera et $etera of the author' of the narrator' of this stor%' Lost in the Funhouse. In a e%wa%s' &it$hes' $anop% #e&s' pinewoo&s' #ri&a suites' ship/s $a#ins' $oa$h0an&0fours' $oa$hes"an& four su tr% too she&s1 on the $o & san& un&er #oar&wa )s' ittere& with l %roducto $i(ar #utts' treasure& with Lu$)% Stri)e $i(arette stu#s' 2o$a02o a $aps' (ritt% tur&s' $ar&#oar& o ipop sti$)s' mat$h#oo) $o!ers warnin( that A S ip of the Lip 2an Sin) a Ship" The sh uppish whisper' $ontinuous as seawash roun& the ( o#e' ti&e i)e fa s an& rises with the $ir$uit of &awn an& &us)" 3a(&a/s teeth" She was eft0han&e&" Perspiration" The%/!e (one a the wa%' throu(h' 3a(&a an& Peter' the%/!e #een waitin( for hours with 3other an& Un$ e ?ar whi e Father sear$hes for his ost son1 the% &raw fren$h0frie& potatoes from a paper $up an& sha)e their hea&s" The%/!e name& the $hi &ren the%/ one &a% ha!e an& #rin( to O$ean 2it% on ho i&a%s" 2an spermato.oa proper % #e thou(ht of as ma e anima $u es when there are no fema e spermato.oa? The% (rope throu(h hot' &ar) win&in(s' past Lo!e/s Tunne /s fearsome o#sta$ es" Some perhaps ose their wa%" Peter su((este& then an& there that the% &o the funhouse1 he ha& #een throu(h it #efore' so ha& 3a(&a' Am#rose ha&n/t an& su((este&' his !oi$e $ra$)in( on a$$ount of Fat 3a%/s au(hter' that the% swim first" A were $hu$) in(' $ou &n/t he p it1 Am#rose/s father' Am#rose/s an& Peter/s father $ame up (rinnin( i)e a unati$ with two #o-es of s%rup0$oate& pop$orn' one for 3other' one for 3a(&a1 the men were to he p themse !es" Am#rose wa )e& on 3a(&a/s ri(ht1 #ein( #% nature eft0han&e&' she $arrie& the #o- in her eft han&" Up front the situation was re!erse&"

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE A +8hat are %ou impin( for?, 3a(&a in*uire& of Am#rose" He suppose& in a hus)% tone that his foot ha& (one to s eep in the $ar" Her teeth f ashe&" +Pins an& nee& es?, It was the hone%su$) e on the atti$e of the former pri!% that &rew the #ees" Ima(ine #ein( stun( there" How on( is this (oin( to ta)e? The a&u ts &e$i&e& to for(o the poo 1 #ut Un$ e ?ar insiste& the% $han(e into swimsuits an& &o the #ea$h" +He wants to wat$h the prett% (ir s', Peter tease&' an& &u$)e& #ehin& 3a(&a from Un$ e ?ar /s preten&e& wrath" +Hou/!e (ot a the prett% (ir s %ou nee& ri(ht here', 3a(&a &e$ are&' an& 3other sai&B +Now that/s the (ospe truth", 3a(&a s$o &e& Peter' who rea$he& o!er her shou &er to snea) some pop$orn" +Hour #rother an& father aren/t (ettin( an%, Un$ e ?ar won&ere& if the% were (oin( to ha!e firewor)s that ni(ht' what with the shorta(es" It wasn/t the shorta(es' 3r" 3 00 rep ie&1 O$ean 2it% ha& firewor)s from pre0war" But it was too ris)% on a$$ount of the enem% su#marines' some peop e thou(ht" +7on/t seem i)e Fourth of Ju % without firewor)s', sai& Un$ e ?ar " The in!erte& ta( in &ia o(ue writin( is sti $onsi&ere& permissi# e with proper names or epithets' #ut soun&s o &0fashione& with persona pronouns" +8e/ ha!e 6em a(ain soon enou(h', pre&i$te& the #o%s/ father" Their mother &e$ are& she $ou & &o without firewor)sB the% remin&e& her too mu$h of the rea thin(" Their father sai& a the more reason to shoot off a few now an& a(ain" Un$ e ?ar as)e& rhetorically who nee&e& remin&in(' >ust oo) at peop e/s hair an& s)in" +The oi ' %es', sai& 3rs" 3 Am#rose ha& a pain in his stoma$h an& so &i&n/t swim #ut en>o%e& wat$hin( the others" He an& his father #urne& re& easi % 3a(&a/s fi(ure was e-$ee&in( % we &e!e ope& for her a(e" The too &e$ ine& to swim' an& (ot ma&' an& #e$ame an(r% when Peter attempte& to &ra( her into the poo " She a wa%s swam' he insiste&1 what &i& she mean not swim? 8h% &i& a person $ome to O$ean 2it%? +3a%#e I want to a% here with Am#rose', 3a(&a tease&" No#o&% i)es a pe&ant" +Aha', sai& 3other" Peter (ra##e& 3a(&a #% one an) e an& or&ere& Am#rose to (ra# the other" She s*uea e& an& ro e& o!er on the #ea$h # an)et" Am#rose preten&e& to he p ho & her #a$)" Her tan was &ar)er than e!en 3other/s an& Peter/s" +He p out' Un$ e ?ar M, Peter $rie&" Un$ e ?ar went to sei.e the other an) e" Insi&e the top of her swimsuit' howe!er' %ou $ou & see the ine where the sun#urn en&e& an&' when she hun$he& her shou &ers an& s*uea e& a(ain' one nipp e/s au#urn e&(e" 3other ma&e them #eha!e themse !es" ()ou shou & $ertain % )now', she sai& to Un$ e ?ar " Ar$h % +That when a a&% sa%s she &oesn/t fee i)e swimmin(' a (ent eman &oesn/t as) *uestions", Un$ e ?ar sai& e-$use him* 3other win)e& at 3a(&a1 Am#rose # ushe&1 stupi& Peter )ept sa%in( +Phooe% on feel li'e+, an& tu((in( at 3a(&a/s an) e1 then e!en he (ot the point' an& $annon#a e& with a ho er into the poo " +I swear', 3a(&a sai&' in mo$) in feigned e-asperation" The &i!in( wou & ma)e a suita# e iterar% s%m#o " To (o off the hi(h #oar& %ou ha& to wait in a ine a on( the poo si&e an& up the a&&er" Fe ows ti$) e& (ir s an& (oose& one another an& shoute& to the ones at the top to hurr% up' or ra..e& them for #e %f oppers" On$e on the sprin(#oar& some too) a (reat whi e posin( or $ ownin( or &e$i&in( on a &i!e or (ettin( up their ner!e1 others ran ri(ht off" Espe$ia % amon( the %oun(er fe ows the i&ea was to stri)e the funniest pose or &o the $ra.iest stunt as %ou fe ' a thin( that (ot har&er to &o as %ou )ept on an& )ept on" But whether %ou ho ere&

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE N -eronimo+ or Sieg heil+, he & %our nose or +ro&e a #i$%$ e', preten&e& to #e shot or &i& a perfe$t >a$))nife or $han(e& %our min& ha fwa% &own an& en&e& up with nothin(' it was o!er in two se$on&s' after a that wait" Sprin(' pose' sp ash" Sprin(' neat0o' sp ash' Sprin(' aw fooe%' sp ash" The (rown0ups ha& (one on1 Am#rose wante& to $on!erse with 3a(&a1 she was remar)a# % we &e!e ope& for her a(e1 it was sai& that that $ame from ru##in( with a tur)ish towe ' an& there were other theories" Am#rose $ou & thin) of nothin( to sa% e-$ept how (oo& a &i!er Peter was' who was showin( off for her #enefit" Hou $ou & prett% we te #% oo)in( at their #athin( suits an& arm mus$ es how far a on( the &ifferent fe ows were" Am#rose was ( a& he ha&n/t (one in swimmin(' the $o & water shran) %ou up so" 3a(&a preten&e& to #e unintereste& in the &i!in(1 she pro#a# % wei(he& as mu$h as he &i&" If %ou )new %our wa% aroun& in the funhouse i)e %our own #e&room' %ou $ou & wait unti a (ir $ame a on( an& then s ip awa% without e!er (ettin( $au(ht' e!en if her #o%frien& I ri(ht with her" She/& thin) he &i& itM It wou & #e #etter to #e the #o%frien&' an& a$t outra(e&' an& tear the funhouse apart" Not a$t1 be. +He/s a master &i!er', Am#rose sai&" In fei(ne& a&miration" +Hou rea % ha!e to s a!e awa% at it to (et that (oo&", 8hat wou & it matter an%how if he as)e& her ri(ht out whether she remem#ere&' e!en tease& her with it as Peter wou & ha!e? There/s no point in (oin( farther1 this isn/t (ettin( an%#o&% an%where1 the% ha!en/t e!en $ome to the funhouse %et" Am#rose is off the tra$)' in some new or o & part of the p a$e that/s not suppose& to #e use&1 he stra%e& into it #% some one0in0a0mi ion $han$e' i)e the time the ro er0$oaster $ar eft the tra$)s in the nineteen0teens a(ainst a the aws of ph%si$s an& sai e& o!er the #oar&wa ) in the &ar)" An& the% $an/t o$ate him #e$ause the% &on/t )now where to oo)" E!en the &esi(ner an& operator ha!e for(otten this other part' that win&s aroun& on itse f i)e a whe ) she " That win&s aroun& the ri(ht part i)e the sna)es on 3er$ur%/s $a&u$eus" Some peop e' perhaps' &on/t +hit their stri&e, unti their twenties' when the (rowin(0up #usiness is o!er an& women appre$iate other thin(s #esi&es wise$ra$)s an& teasin( an& struttin(" Peter &i&n/t ha!e one0tenth the ima(ination he ha&' not one0tenth" Peter &i& this namin(0their0$hi &ren thin( as a >o)e' ma)in( up names i)e A o%sius an& 3ur(atro%&' #ut Am#rose )new e.actly how it wou & fee to #e marrie& an& ha!e $hi &ren of %our own' an& #e a o!in( hus#an& an& father' an& (o $omforta# % to wor) in the mornin(s an& to #e& with %our wife at ni(ht' an& wa)e up with her there" 8ith a #ree.e $omin( throu(h the sash an& #ir&s an& mo$)in(#ir&s sin(in( in the 2hinese0$i(ar trees" His e%es watere&' there aren/t enou(h wa%s to sa% that" He wou & #e *uite famous in his ine of wor)" 8hether 3a(&a was his wife or not' one e!enin( when he was wise0 ine& an& (ra% at the temp es he/& smi e (ra!e %' at a fashiona# e &inner part% an& remin& her of his %outhfu passion" The time the% went with his fami % to O$ean 2it%1 the erotic fantasies he use& to ha!e a#out her" How on( a(o it seeme&' an& $hi &ishM Het ten&er' too' n/est&ce pas0 8ou & she ha!e ima(ine& that the wor &0famous whate!er remem#ere& how man% strin(s were on the %re on the #en$h #esi&e the (ir on the a#e of the $i(ar #o- he/& stare& at in the too she& at a(e ten whi e' she' a(e e e!en" E!en then he ha& fe t wise beyond his years* he/& stro)e& her hair an& sai& in his &eepest !oi$e an& $orre$test En( ish' as to a &ear $hi &B +I sha ne!er for(et this moment", But thou(h he ha& #reathe& hea!i %' (roane& as if e$stati$' what he/& rea % fe t throu(hout was an o&& &eta$hment' as thou(h someone e se were 3aster" Stri!e as he

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE O mi(ht to #e transporte&' he hear& his min& ta)e notes upon the s$eneB "his is what they call passion" I am e.periencing it. 3an% of the &i((er ma$hines were out of or&er in the penn% ar$a&es an& $ou & not #e repaire& or rep a$e& for the &uration" 3oreo!er the pri.es' ma&e now in USA' were ess interestin( than former %' paste#oar& items for the most part' an& some of the ma$hines wou &n/t wor) on white pennies" The (%ps% fortune0 te er ma$hine mi(ht ha!e pro!i&e& a foresha&owin( of the $ ima- of this stor% if Am#rose ha& operate& it" It was e!en &i api&ate&er than mostB the si !er $oatin( was worn off the #rown meta han& es' the ( ass win&ows aroun& the &umm% were $ra$)e& an& tape&' her )er$hiefs an& si )s on( fa&e&" If a man i!e& #% himse f' he $ou & ta)e a &epartment0store manne*uin with f e-i# e >oints an& mo&if% her in $ertain wa%s" 1owever2 #% the time he was that o & he/& ha!e a rea woman" There was a ma$hine that stampe& %our name aroun& a white0meta $oin with a star in the mi&& eB A " His son wou & #e the se$on&' an& when the a& rea$he& thirteen or so he wou & put a stron( arm aroun& his shou &er an& te him $a m %B +It is perfe$t % norma " 8e ha!e a #een throu(h it" It wi not ast fore!er", No#o&% )new how to #e what the% were ri(ht" He/& smo)e a pipe' tea$h his son how to fish an& soft$ra#' assure him he nee&n/t worr% a#out himse f" 3a(&a wou & $ertain % (i!e' 3a(&a wou & $ertain % %ie & a (reat &ea of mi )' a thou(h (ui t% of o$$asiona so e$isms" It &on/t taste so #a&" Suppose the i(hts $ame on nowM "he day wore on. Hou thin) %ou/re %ourse f' #ut there are other persons in %ou" Am#rose (ets har& when Am#rose &oesn/t want to' and obversely. Am#rose wat$hes them &isa(ree1 Am#rose wat$hes him wat$h" In the fun0house mirror room %ou $an/t see %ourse f (o on fore!er' #e$ause no matter how %ou stan&' %our hea& (ets in the wa%" E!en if %ou ha& a ( ass peris$ope' the ima(e of %our e%e wou & $o!er up the thin( %ou rea % wante& to see" The po i$e wi $ome1 there/ #e a stor% in the papers" That must #e where it happene&" Un ess he $an fin& a surprise e-it' an unoffi$ia #a$)&oor or es$ape hat$h openin( on an a e%' sa%' an& then stro up to the fami % in front of the funhouse an& as) where e!er%#o&%/s #een1 he/s #een out of the p a$e for a(es" That/s >ust where it happene&' in that ast i(hte& roomB Peter an& 3a(&a foun& the ri(ht e-it1 he foun& one that %ou weren/t suppose& to fin& an& stra%e& off into the wor)s somewhere" In a perfe$t funhouse %ou/& #e a# e to (o on % one wa%' i)e the &i!ers off the hi(h #oar&1 (ettin( ost wou & #e impossi# e1 the &oors an& ha s wou & wor) i)e minnow traps on the !a !es in !eins" On a$$ount of 4erman U0#oats' O$ean 2it% was +#rowne& out,B street i(hts were sha&e& on the seawar& si&e1 shop0win&ows an& #oar&wa ) amusement p a$es were )ept &im' not to si houette tan)ers an& Li#ert% ships for torpe&oin(" In a short stor% a#out O$ean 2it%' 3ar% an&' &urin( 8or & 8ar II' the author $ou & ma)e use of the ima(e of sai ors on ea!e in the penn% ar$a&es an& shootin( (a eries' si(htin( throu(h the $rosshairs of to% ma$hine (uns at swasti)a/& su#s' whi e out in the # a$) At anti$ a U0 #oat s)ipper s*uints throu(h his peris$ope at rea ships out ine& #% the ( ow of penn% ar$a&es" After &inner the fami % stro e& #a$) to the amusement en& of the #oar&wa )" The #o%s/ father ha& #urnt re& as a wa%s an& was mas)e& with No-.ema' a minstre in re!erse" The (rownups stoo& at the en& of the #oar&wa ) where the Hurri$ane of 6@@ ha& $ut an in et from the o$ean to Assawoman Ba%" +Pronoun$e& with a on( o,, Un$ e ?ar remin&e& 3a(&a with a win)" His shirt s ee!es were ro e& up1 3other pun$he& his #rown #i$eps with the arrowe& heart on it an& sai& his min& was nau(ht%" Fat 3a%/s au(h $ame su&&en % from the funhouse' as if she/& >ust (ot the >o)e1 the fami % au(he& too at the $oin$i&en$e" Am#rose went un&er

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE < the #oar&wa ) to sear$h for out0of0town mat$h#oo) $o!ers with the ai& of his po$)et f ash i(ht1 he oo)e& out from the e&(e of the North Ameri$an $ontinent an& won&ere& how far their au(hter $arrie& o!er the water" Spies in ru##er rafts1 sur!i!ors in ife#oats" If the >o)e ha& #een #e%on& his un&erstan&in(' he $ou & ha!e sai&B ("he laughter was over his head., An& et the rea&er see the serious wor&p a% on se$on& rea&in(" He turne& the f ash i(ht on an& then off at on$e e!en #efore the woman whoope&" He spran( awa%' heart athu&' &roppin( the i(ht" 8hat ha& the man (runte&? Perspiration &ren$he& an& $hi e& him #% the time he s$ram# e& up to the fami %" +See an%thin(?, his father as)e&" His !oi$e wou &n/t $ome1 he shru((e& an& !io ent % #rushe& san& from his pants e(s" +Let/s ri&e the o & f %in( horsesM, 3a(&a $rie&" I/ ne!er #e an author" It/s #een fore!er a rea&%' e!er%#o&%/s (one home' O$ean 2it%/s &eserte&' the (host0$ra#s are ti$) in( a$ross the #ea$h an& &own the ittere& $o & streets" An& the empt% ha s of $ ap#oar& hote s an& a#an&one& funhouses" A ti&a wa!e1 an enem% air rai&1 a monster0 $ra# swe in( i)e an is an& from the sea" "he inhabitants fled in terror. 3a(&a $ un( to his trouser e(1 he a one )new the ma.e/s se$ret" +He (a!e his ife that we mi(ht i!e', sai& Un$ e ?ar with a s$ow of pain' as he" The fe ow/s han&s ha& #een tattooe&1 the woman/s e(s' the woman/s fat white e(s ha&" An astonishing coincidence. He %earne& to te Peter" He wante& to throw up for e-$itement" The% ha&n/t e!en $hase& him" He wishe& he were &ea&" One possi# e en&in( wou & #e to ha!e Am#rose $ome a$ross another ost person in the &ar)" The%/& mat$h their wits to(ether a(ainst the funhouse' stru(( e i)e U %sses past o#sta$ e after o#sta$ e' he p an& en$oura(e ea$h other" Or a (ir " B% the time the% foun& the e-it the%/& #e $ osest frien&s' sweethearts if it were a (ir 1 the%/& )now ea$h other/s inmost sou s' #e #oun& to(ether by the cement of shared adventure* then the%/& emer(e into the i(ht an& it wou & turn out that his frien& was a Ne(ro" A # in& (ir " Presi&ent Roose!e t/s son" Am#rose/s former ar$henem% Short % after the mirror room he/& (rope& a on( a must% $orri&or' his heart a rea&% mis(i!in( him at the a#sen$e of phosphores$ent arrows an& other si(ns" He/& foun& a $ra$) of i(ht 5 not a &oor' it turne& out' #ut a seam #etween the p % #oar& wa pane s 5 an& s*uintin( up to it' espie& a sma o & man' in appearance not unli'e the photo(raphs at home of Am#rose/s ate (ran&father' no&&in( upon a stoo #eneath a #are' spe$) e& #u #" A $ru&e pane of to(( e0 an& )nife0swit$hes hun( #esi&e the open fuse #onear his hea&1 e sewhere in the itt e room were woo&en e!ers an& ropes #e a%e& to #oat $ eats" At the time' Am#rose wasn/t ost enou(h to rap or $a 1 ater he $ou &n/t fin& that $ra$)" Now it seeme& to him that he/& possi# % &o.e& off for a few minutes somewhere a on( the wa%1 $ertain % he was e-hauste& from the afternoon/s sunshine an& the e!enin(/s pro# ems1 he $ou &n/t #e sure he ha&n/t &reame& part or a of the si(ht" Ha& an o & # a$) wa fan &rone& i)e #ees an& shimmie& two f %paper streamers? Ha& the funhouse operator 5(ent e' somewhat sa& an& tire&0appearin(' in e-pression not un i)e the photo(raphs at home of Am#rose/s ate Un$ e ?onra& 5 murmure& in his s eep? Is there rea % su$h a person as Am#rose' or is he a fi(ment of the author/s ima(ination? 8as it Assawoman Ba% or Sinepu-ent? Are there other errors of fa$t in this fi$tion? 8as there another soun& #esi&es the itt e s ap s ap of thi(h on ham' i)e water su$)in( at the $hine0#oar&s of a s)iff? 8hen %ou/re ost' the smartest thin( to &o is sta% put ti %ou/re foun& ho erin( if

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE ;P ne$essar% But to ho er (uarantees humi iation as we as res$ue1 )eepin( si ent permits some sa!in( of fa$e 5 %ou $an a$t surprise& at the fuss when %our res$uers fin& %ou an& swear %ou weren/t ost' if the% &o" 8hat/s more %ou mi(ht fin& %our own wa% %et' however belatedly. +7on/t te me %our foot/s sti as eepM, 3a(&a e-$ aime& as the three %oun( peop e wa )e& from the in et to the area set asi&e for ferris whee s' $arrouse s' an& other $arni!a ri&es' the% ha!in( &e$i&e& in fa!or of the !ast an& an$ient merr%0(o0roun& instea& of the funhouse" 8hat a senten$e' e!er%thin( was wron( from the outset" Peop e &on/t )now what to ma)e of him' he &oesn/t )now what to ma)e of himse f' he/s on % thirteen' athletically and socially inept, not astonishin( % #ri(ht' #ut there are antennae1 he has""' some sort of re$ei!ers in his hea&1 thin(s spea) to him' he un&erstan&s more than he shou &' the wor & win)s at him throu(h its o#>e$ts' (ra#s (rinnin( at his $oat" E!er%#o&% e se is in on some se$ret he &oesn/t )now1 the%/!e for(otten to te him" Throu(h simp e procrastination his mother put off his #aptism unti this %ear" E!er%one e se ha& it &one as a #a#%1 he/& assume& the same of himse f' as ha& his mother' so she $ aime&' unti it was time for him to >oin 4ra$e 3etho&ist0Protestant an& the o!ersi(ht $ame out" He was mortifie&' #ut pit$he& s eep ess throu(h his pri!ate $ate$hi.in(' intimi&ate& #% the an$ient m%steries' a thirteen %ear o & wou & ne!er sa% that' reso !e& to e-perien$e $on!ersion i)e St" Au(ustine" 8hen the water tou$he& his #row an& A&am/s sin eft him' he $ontri!e& #% a strain i)e &efe$ation to #rin( tears into his e%es 5 #ut fe t nothin(" There was some simp e' ra&i$a &ifferen$e a#out him1 he hope& it was (enius' feare& it was ma&ness' &e!ote& himse f to amia#i it% an& in$onspi$uousness" A one on the seawa near his house he was sei.e& #% the terrif%in( transports he/& thou(ht to fin& in too she&' in 2ommunion0$up" The (rass was a i!eM The town' the ri!er' himse f' were not ima(inar%1 time roare& in his ears i)e win&1 the wor & was going on+ This part ou(ht to #e &ramati.e&" The Irish author James Jo%$e on$e wrote" Am#rose 3 5 is (oin( to s$ream" There is no te.ture of rendered sensory detail, for one thin(" The fa&e& &istortin( mirrors #esi&e Fat 3a%1 the impossi#i it% of $hoosin( a mount when one ha& #ut a sin( e ri&e on the (reat $arrouse 1 the vertigo attendant on his recognition that O$ean 2it% was worn out' the p a$e of fathers an& (ran&fathers' straw0#oatere& men an& paraso e& a&ies sur!i!e& #% their amusements" 3one% spent' the three pause& at Peter/s insisten$e #esi&e Fat 3a% to wat$h the (ir s (et their s)irts # own up" The o#>e$t was to tease 3a(&a' who sai&B +I swear' Peter 3 5' %ou/!e (ot a one0tra$) min&M Am#% an& me aren/t interested in su$h thin(s", In the tum# in(0#arre ' too' >ust insi&e the 7e!i /s mouth enhan$e to the funhouse' the (ir s were upen&e& an& their #o%frien&s an& others $ou & see up their &resses if the% $are& to" 8hi$h was the who e point' Am#rose rea i.e&" Of the entire funhouseM If %ou oo)e& aroun&' %ou noti$e& that a most a the peop e on the #oar&wa ) were paire& off into 2oup es e-$ept the sma $hi &ren1 in a wa%' that was the who e point of O$ean 2it%M If %ou ha& G0ra% e!es an& $ou & see e!er%thin( (oin( on at that instant un&er the #oar&wa ) an& in a the hote rooms an& $ars an& a e%wa%s' %ou/& rea i.e that a that norma % showed, i)e restaurants an& &an$e ha s an& $ othin( an& test0%our0 stren(th ma$hines' was mere % preparation an& intermission" Fat 3a% s$reame&" Be$ause he wat$he& the (oin(0ons from the $orner of his e%e' it was Am#rose who spie& the ha f0&o ar on the #oar&wa ) near the tum# in(0#arre " Losers weepers" The first time he/& hear& some peop e mo!in( throu(h a $orri&or not far awa%' >ust after he/& ost si(ht of the $ra$) of i(ht' he/& &e$i&e& not to $a to them' for fear the%/& (uess he was s$are& an& po)e fun1 it soun&e& i)e rou(hne$)s1 he/& hope& the%/& $ome #% an& he

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE ;; $ou & fo ow in the &ar) without their )nowin(" Another time he/& hear& >ust one person' un ess he ima(ine& it' #umpin( a on( as if on the other si&e of the p %woo&1 perhaps Peter $omin( #a$) for him' or Father' or 3a(&a ost too" Or the owner an& operator of the funhouse" He/& $a e& out on$e' as thou(h merri %B +An%#o&% )now where the he$) we are?, But the *uer% was too stiff' his !oi$e $ra$)e&' when the soun&s stoppe& he was terrifie&B ma%#e it was a *ueer who waite& for fe ows to (et ost' or a on(haire& fi th% monster that i!e& in some $rann% of the funhouse" He stoo& ri(i& for hours it seeme& i)e' s$ar$e % respirin(" His future was sho$)in( % $ ear' in out ine" He trie& ho &in( his #reath to the point of un$ons$iousness" There ou(ht to #e a #utton %ou $ou & push to en& %our ife a#so ute % without pain1 &isappear in a f i$)' i)e turnin( out a i(ht" He wou & push it instant %M He &espise& Un$ e ?ar " But he &espise& his father too' for not #ein( what he was suppose& to #e" Perhaps his father hate& his father' an& so on' an& his son wou & hate him' an& so on" Instant %M Natura % he &i&n/t ha!e ner!e enou(h to as) 3a(&a to (o throu(h the funhouse with him" 8ith in$re&i# e ner!e an& to e!er%one/s surprise he in!ite& 3a(&a' *uiet % an& po ite %' to (o throu(h the funhouse with him" +I warn %ou' I/!e ne!er #een throu(h it #efore', he a&&e&' laughing easily* +#ut I re$)on we $an mana(e somehow" The important thin( to remem#er' after a ' is that it/s meant to #e a funhouse1 that is' a p a$e of amusement" If peop e rea % (ot ost or in>ure& or too #a& % fri(htene& in it' the owner/& (o out of #usiness" There/& e!en #e awsuits" No $hara$ter in a wor) of fi$tion $an ma)e a spee$h this on( without interruption or a$)now e&(ment from the other $hara$ters", 3other tease& Un$ e ?ar B +Three/s a $row&' I a wa%s hear&", But a$tua % Am#rose was re ie!e& that Peter now ha& a *uarter too" Nothin( was what it oo)e& i)e" E!er% instant' un&er the surfa$e of the At anti$ O$ean' mi ions of i!in( anima s &e!oure& one another" Pi ots were fa in( in f ames o!er Europe1 women were #ein( for$i# % rape& in the South Pa$ifi$" His father shou & ha!e ta)en him asi&e an& sai&B +There is a simp e se$ret to (ettin( throu(h the funhouse' as simp e as #ein( first to see the Towers" Here it is" Peter &oes not )now it1 neither &oes %our Un$ e ?ar " Hou an& I are &ifferent" Not surprisin( %' %ou/!e often wishe& %ou weren/t" 7on/t thin) I ha!en/t noti$e& how unhapp% %our $hi &hoo& has #eenM But %ou/ un&erstan&' when I te %ou' wh% it ha& to #e )ept se$ret unti now" An& %ou won/t re(ret not #ein( i)e %our #rother an& %our un$ e" 3n the contrary+, If %ou )new a the stories #ehin& a the peop e on the #oar&wa )' %ou/& see that nothing was what it oo)e& i)e" Hus#an&s an& wi!es often hate& ea$h other1 parents &i&n/t ne$essari % o!e their $hi &ren1 et $etera" A $hi & too) thin(s for (rante& #e$ause he ha& nothin( to $ompare his ife to an& e!er%#o&% a$te& as if thin(s were as the% shou & #e" Therefore ea$h saw himse f as the hero of the stor%' when the truth mi(ht turn out to #e that he/s the !i ain' or the $owar&" An& there wasn/t one thin( %ou $ou & &o a#out itM Hun$h#a$)s' fat a&ies' foo s 5 that no one $hose what he was was un#eara# e" In the mo!ies he/& meet a #eautifu %oun( (ir in the funhouse1 the%/& ha!e hairs0#rea&th es$apes from rea &an(ers1 he/& &o an& sa% the ri(ht thin(s1 she a so1 in the en& the%/& #e o!ers1 their &ia o(ue ines wou & mat$h up1 he/& #e perfe$t % at ease1 she/& not on % i)e him we enou(h' she/& thin) he was marvelous* she/& ie awa)e thin)in( a#out him, instea& of !i$e !ersa 5the wa% his fa$e oo)e& in &ifferent i(hts an& how he stoo& an& e-a$t % what he/& sai& 5 an& %et that wou & #e on % one sma episo&e in his won&erfu

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE ;C ife' amon( man% man% others" Not a turning point at a " 8hat ha& happene& in the too she& was nothin(" He hate&' he oathe& his parentsM One reason for not writin( a ost0 in0the0funhouse stor% is that either e!er%#o&%/s fe t what Am#rose fee s' in whi$h $ase it (oes without sa%in(' or e se no norma person fee s su$h thin(s' in whi$h $ase Am#rose is a frea)" +Is an%thin( more tiresome' in fi$tion' than the pro# ems of sensiti!e a&o es$ents?, An& it/s a too on( an& ram# in(' as if the author" For a a person )nows the first time throu(h' the en& $ou & #e >ust aroun& an% $orner1 perhaps' not impossibly it/s #een within rea$h an% num#er of times" On the other han& he ma% #e s$ar$e % past the start' with e!er%thin( %et to (et throu(h' an into era# e i&ea" Fill in2 His father/s raise& e%e#rows when he announ$e& his &e$ision to &o the funhouse with 3a(&a" Am#rose un&erstan&s now' #ut &i&n/t then' that his father was won&erin( whether he )new what the funhouse was for 5 espe$ia % sin$e he &i&n/t o#>e$t' as he shou & ha!e' when Peter &e$i&e& to $ome a on( too" The ti$)et0woman' wit$h i)e' mortif%in( him when ina&!ertent % he (a!e her his name0$oin instea& of the ha f0&o ar' then un)in& % $a in( 3a(&a/s attention to the #irthmar) on his temp eB +8at$h out for him' (ir ie' he/s a mar)e& manM, She wasn/t e!en $rue ' he un&erstoo&' on % !u (ar an& insensiti!e" Somewhere in the wor & there was a %oun( woman with su$h sp en&i& un&erstan&in( that she/& see him entire' i)e a poem or stor%' an& fin& his wor&s so !a ua# e after a that when he $onfesse& his apprehensions she wou & e-p ain wh% the% were in fa$t the !er% thin(s that ma&e him pre$ious to her " " " an& to 8estern 2i!i i.ationM There was no su$h (ir ' the simp e truth #ein(" 9io ent %awns as the% approa$he& the mouth" 8hispere& a&!i$e from an o &0timer on a #en$h near the #arre B +4o $ra#wise an& %e/ (et an e%efu without upsettin(M, 2omposure !anishe& at the first pit$hB Peter ho ere& >o%ous %' 3a(&a tum# e&' shrie)e&' $ ut$he& her s)irt1 Am#rose s$ram# e& $ra#wise' ti(ht0 ippe& with terror' was soon out' wat$he& his &roppe& name0 $oin s i&e amon( the $oup es" Shame0fa$e& he saw that to (et throu(h e-pe&itious % was not the point1 Peter fei(ne& assistan$e in or&er to trip 3a(&a up' shoute& +; see 2hristmasM, when her e(s went f %in(" The o & man' his atest #etra%er' $a$) e& appro!a " A &im hai then of # a$)0threa& $o#we#s an& re$or&e& (i##erB he too) 3a(&a/s e #ow to stea&I/ her a(ainst re!o !in( &is$s set in the s ante& f oor to throw %our feet out from un&er' an& e-p aine& to her in a $a m' &eep !oi$e his theor% that ea$h phase of the funhouse was tri((ere& either automati$a %' #% a series of photoe e$tri$ &e!i$es' or e se manua % #% operators statione& at peepho es" But he ost his !oi$e thri$e as the &is$s un#a an$e& him1 3a(&a was an%how s*uea in(1 #ut at one point she $ ut$he& him a#out the waist to )eep from fa in(' an& her ri(ht $hee) presse& for a moment a(ainst his #e t0 #u$) e" Heroi$a % he &rew her up' it was his $han$e to $ ut$h her $ ose as if for support an& sa%B +; o!e %ou", He e!en put an arm i(ht % a#out the sma of her #a$) #efore a sai or0an&0(ir pit$he& into them from #ehin&' sore % trea&in( his eft #i( toe an& )no$)in( 3a(&a aspraw with them" The sai or/s (ir was a strin(0haire& huss% with a ou& au(h an& i(ht # ue &rawers1 Am#rose rea i.e& that he wou &n/t ha!e sai& +; o!e %ou, an%how' an& was smitten with se f0$ontempt" How mu$h #etter it wou & #e to #e that $ommon sai orM A wir% itt e Seaman @r&' the fe ow s*uee.e& a (ir to ea$h si&e an& stum# e& hi arious into the mirror room' $ oser to 3a(&a in thirt% se$on&s than Am#rose ha& (ot in thirteen %ears" She (i(( e& at somethin( the fe ow sai& to Peter1 she &rew her hair from her e%es with a mo!ement so woman % it stru$) Am#rose/s heart1 Peter/s sma$)in( her #a$)si&e then seeme& parti$u ar % $oarse" But 3a(&a ma&e a p ease& in&i(nant fa$e an& $rie&' +A ri(ht for you, misterM, an& pursue& Peter into the ma.e

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE ;@ without a #a$)war& ( an$e" The sai or fo owe& after' eisure %' &rawin( his (ir a(ainst his hip1 Am#rose un&erstoo& not on % that the% were a so re ie!e& to #e ri& of his #ur&ensome $ompan% that the% &i&n/t e!en noti$e his a#sen$e' #ut that he himse f share& their re ief" Steppin( from the trea$herous passa(e at ast into the mirror0ma.e' he saw on$e a(ain' more $ ear % than e!er' how rea&i % he &e$ei!e& himse f into supposin( he was a person" He e!en foresaw' win$in( at his &rea&fu se f0)now e&(e' that he wou & repeat the &e$eption' at e!er0rarer inter!a s' a his wret$he& ife' so fearfu were the a ternati!es" Fame' ma&ness' sui$i&e1 perhaps a three" It/s not #e ie!a# e that so %oun( a #o% $ou & arti$u ate that ref e$tion' an& in fi$tion the mere % true must a wa%s %ie & to the p ausi# e" 3oreo!er' the s%m#o ism is in p a$es hea!%0foote&" Het Am#rose 3 5 un&erstoo&' as few a&u ts &o' that the famous one iness of the (reat was no popu ar m%th #ut a (enera truth 5 furthermore' that it was as mu$h $ause as effe$t" A the pre$e&in( e-$ept the ast few senten$es is e-position that shou &/!e #een &one ear ier or intersperse& with the present a$tion instea& of umpe& to(ether" No rea&er wou & put up with so mu$h with su$h proli.ity. It/s interestin( that Am#rose/s father' thou(h presuma# % an inte i(ent man :as in&i$ate& #% his ro e as (ra&e0s$hoo prin$ipa =' neither en$oura(e& nor &is$oura(e& his sons at a in an% wa% 5 as if he either &i&n/t $are a#out them or $are& a ri(ht #ut &i&n/t )now how to a$t" If this fa$t shou & $ontri#ute to one of them/s #e$omin( a $e e#rate& #ut wret$he& % unhapp% s$ientist' was it a (oo& thin( or not? He too mi(ht some&a% fa$e the *uestion1 it wou & #e usefu to )now whether it ha& torture& his father for %ears' for e-amp e' or ne!er on$e $rosse& his min&" In the ma.e two important thin(s happene&" First' our hero foun& a name0$oin someone e se ha& ost or &is$ar&e&B A3BROSE' su((esti!e of the famous i(htship an& of his ate (ran&father/s fa!orite &essert' whi$h his mother use& to prepare on spe$ia o$$asions out of $o$onut' oran(es' (rapes' an& what e se" Se$on&' as he won&ere& at the en& ess rep i$ation of his ima(e in the mirrors' se$on&' as he lost himself in the reflection that the ne$essit% for an o#ser!er ma)es perfe$t o#ser!ation impossi# e' #etter ma)e him ei(hteen at east' %et that wou & ren&er other thin(s un i)e %' he hear& Peter an& 3a(&a $hu$) in( somewhere to(ether in the ma.e" +HereM, +No' hereM, the% shoute& to ea$h other1 Peter sai&' +8here/s Am#%?, 3a(&a murmure& +Am#?, Peter $a e&" In a p ease&' frien& % !oi$e" He &i&n/t rep %" The truth was' his #rother was a happy&go&luc'y youngster who/&/!e #een #etter off with a re(u ar #rother of his own' #ut who se &om $omp aine& of his ot an& was (enera % $or&ia " Am#rose/s throat a$he&1 there aren/t enou(h &ifferent wa%s to sa% that" He stoo& *uiet % whi e the two %oun( peop e (i(( e& an& thumpe& throu(h the ( itterin( ma.e' hurrah/& their &is$o!er% of its e-it' $rie& out in >o%fu a arm at what ne-t #eset them" Then he set his mouth an& fo owe& after' as he suppose&' too) a wron( turn' stra%e& into the pass wherein he lingers yet. The a$tion of $on!entiona &ramati$ narrati!e ma% #e represente& #% a &ia(ram $a e& Freita(/s Trian( eB

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE

;J

or more a$$urate % #% a !ariant of that &ia(ramB C

B A

in whi$h A4 represents the e-position' 4 the intro&u$tion of $onf i$t' 45 the +risin( a$tion', $omp i$ation' or &e!e opment of the $onf i$t' 5 the $ ima-' or turn of the a$tion' 5D the &enouement' or reso ution of the $onf i$t" 8hi e there is no reason to re(ar& this pattern as an a#so ute ne$essit%' i)e man% other $on!entions it #e$ame $on!entiona #e$ause (reat num#ers of peop e o!er man% %ears earne& #% tria an& error that it was effe$ti!e1 one ou(ht not to forsa)e it' therefore' un ess one wishes to forsa)e as we the effe$t of &rama or has $ ear $ause to fee that &e i#erate !io ation of the +norma , pattern $an #etter $an #etter effe$t that effe$t" This $an/t (o on mu$h on(er1 it $an (o on fore!er" He &ie& te in( stories to himse f in the &ar)1 %ears ater' when that !ast unsuspe$te& area of the funhouse $ame to i(ht' the first e-pe&ition foun& his s)e eton in one of its a#%rinthine $orri&ors an& mistoo) it for part of the entertainment" He &ie& of star!ation te in( himse f stories in the &ar)1 #ut un#e)nownst un#e)nownst to him' an assistant operator of the funhouse' happenin( to o!erhear him' $rou$he& >ust #ehin& the p % #oar& partition an& wrote &own his e!er% wor&" The operator/s &au(hter' an e-*uisite %oun( woman with a fi(ure unusua % we &e!e ope& for her a(e' $rou$he& >ust #ehin& the partition an& trans$ri#e& his e!er% wor&" Thou(h she ha& ne!er ai& e%es on him' she re$o(ni.e& that here was one of 8estern 2u ture/s tru % (reat ima(inations' the e o*uen$e of whose sufferin( wou & #e an inspiration to unnum#ere&" An& her heart was torn #etween her o!e for the misfortunate %oun( man :%es' she o!e& him' thou(h she ha& ne!er ai& thou(h she )new him on % 5 #ut how we M 5 throu(h his wor&s' an& the &eep' $a m !oi$e in whi$h he spo)e them= #etween her o!e et $etera an& her woman % intuition that on % in sufferin( an& iso ation $ou & he (i!e !oi$e et $etera" Lone &ar) &%in(" Fuiet % she )isse& the rou(h p % #oar&' an& a tear fe upon the pa(e" 8here she ha& written in shorthan& 6here she had written in shorthand 8here she ha& written in shorthan& 6here she et $etera" A on( time a(o we shou & ha!e passe& the ape- of Freita(/s Trian( e an& ma&e #rief wor) of the d7nouement* the p ot &oesn/t rise #% meanin(fu steps #ut win&s upon itse f' &i(resses' retreats' hesitates' si(hs' $o apses' e-pires" The $ ima- of the stor% must #e its prota(onist/s &is$o!er% of a wa% to (et throu(h the funhouse" But he ha& foun& none' ma% ha!e $ease& to sear$h" 8hat re e!an$e &oes the war ha!e to the stor%? Shou & there #e firewor)s outsi&e or not? Am#rose wan&ere&' an(uishe&' &o.e&" Now an& then he fe into his ha#it of rehearsin( to himse f the una&!enturous stor% of his ife' narrate& from the thir&0person point of !iew' from his ear iest memor% parenthesis of map e ea!es stirrin( in the summer #reath of ti&ewater 3ar% an& en& of parenthesis to the present moment" Its prin$ipa e!ents' on this te in(' wou & appear to ha!e #een A, 4, 5, an& D.

LOST IN THE FUNHOUSE ;L He ima(ine& himse f %ears hen$e' su$$essfu ' marrie&' at ease in the wor &' the tria s of his a&o es$en$e far #ehin& him" He has $ome to the seashore with his fami % for the ho i&a%B how O$ean 2it% has $han(e&M But at one se &om at one i 0fre*uente& en& of the #oar&wa ) a few &ere i$t" amusements sur!i!e from times (one #%B the (reat $arrouse from the turn ofM the $entur%' with its monstrous (riffins an& me$hani$a $on$ert #an&1 the ro er $oaster rumore& sin$e ;<;A to ha!e #een $on&emne&1 the me$hani$a shootin( (a er% in whi$h on % the ima(e of our enemies $han(e&B His own son au(hs with Fat 3a% an& wants to )now what a funhouse is1 Am#rose hu(s the stur&% a& $ ose an& smi es aroun& his pipe stem at his wife" The fami %/s (oin( home" 3other sits #etween Father an& Un$ e ?ar ' who teases him (oo&0nature& % who $hu$) es o!er the fa$t that the $omra&e with whom he/& fou(ht his wa% shou &er to shou &er throu(h the funhouse ha& turne& out to #e a # in& Ne(ro (ir 5 to their mutua &is$omfort' as the%/& opene& their sou s" But su$h are the wa s of $ustom' whi$h e!en" 8hose arm is where? How must it fee " He &reams of a funhouse !aster #%/ far than an% %et $onstru$te&1 #ut #% then the% ma% #e out of fashion' i)eI steam#oats an& e-$ursion trains" A rea&% *uaint an& see&%B the &raperie& a&ies on the frie.e of the $arrouse are his father/s father/s moon$hee)e& &reams1 if he thin)s of it more he wi !omit his app e0on0a0sti$)" He won&ersB wi he #e$ome a re(u ar person? Somethin( has (one wron(1 his !a$$ination &i&n/t ta)e1 at the Bo%0S$out initiation $ampfire he on % preten&e& to #e &eep % mo!e&' as he preten&s to this hour that it is not so #a& after a in the funhouse' an& that he has a itt e imp" How on( wi it ast? He en!isions a tru % astonishin( funhouse' in$re&i# % $omp e- %et utter % $ontro e& from a (reat $entra swit$h#oar& i)e the $onso e of a pipe or(an" No#o&% ha& enou(h ima(ination" He $ou & &esi(n su$h a p a$e himse f' wirin( an& a ' an& he/s on % thirteen %ears o &" He wou & #e its operatorB pane i(hts wou & show what was up in e!er% $rann% of its $unnin( of its mu ti!arious !astness1 a swit$h0f i$) wou & ease this fe ow/s wa%' $omp i$ate that/s' to #a an$e thin(s out1 if an%one seeme& ost or fri(htene&' a the operator ha& to &o was" He wishes he ha& ne!er entere& the funhouse" But he has" Then he wishes he were &ea&" But he/s not" Therefore he wi $onstru$t funhouses for others an& #e their se$ret operator 5 thou(h he wou & rather #e amon( the o!ers for whom funhouses are &esi(ne&" :;<AO=