NLP Mini Course
NLP Mini Course
NLP Mini Course
Copyright Charles Steed & UserFriendlyBooks.co !isit" User Friendly Books #ark Persuasion Techni$ues Scienti%ic Study Method &'erco e Procrastination No(
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Legal Stuff & Disclaimer The information in The NLP Mini Course is intended to provide educational information on topics related to human motivational methods and techniques. The publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, medical, financial, advice or other professional services. If expert assistance is required, please see the services of a competent professional. Legal !tuff and "isclaimer The publisher has endeavored to ma e the material in this guide accurate. The information should be used onl# as general guide$ ho%ever, as the publisher cannot guarantee that this information is free of t#pographical or content errors. &urthermore, each piece of content contains educational information onl# up to its original publication date. The information in The NLP Mini Course is provided 'as(is.) The author and publisher %ill assume no liabilit#, nor responsibilit# to an# person or entit# %ith respect to an# loss or damage related directl# or indirectl# to the information in "ar Persuasion Techniques. No *arranties of an# ind, express or implied are made. The publisher %ill provide no remed# for indirect, consequential, punitive or incidental damages arising from this guide, including such from negligence, strict liabilit#, or breach of %arrant# or contract, even after notice of the possibilit# of such damages. It is the ultimate responsibilit# of the user of The NLP Mini Course to determine the validit# of an# of the concepts profiled in the guide.
Table Of Contents
*hat Is NLP1...........................................................................................................................2 The Presuppositions 3f NLP...................................................................................................4 5stablishing 6apport...............................................................................................................7 6epresentational !#stems... Modalities................................................................................88 6epresentational !#stems and !peech Patterns.................................................................89 6epresentational !#stems and Language.............................................................................89 5#e +ccessing Cues................................................................................................................8: 5#e +ccessing Chart...............................................................................................................82 0od# +ccessing Chart.............................................................................................................84 5#e +ccessing Cue 5xercises.................................................................................................8; Calibration..............................................................................................................................8< Cues &or =isual Calibration..................................................................................................87 Cues &or +uditor# Calibration..............................................................................................87 +nchoring................................................................................................................................98 !ubmodalities.........................................................................................................................9> Changing + "isturbing 5xperience.......................................................................................92 !%ish Pattern 5xercise..........................................................................................................94 !lingshot =ariation 3f The !%ish Pattern...........................................................................9; Ne% 0ehavior ?enerator.......................................................................................................9< &ast Phobia Cure....................................................................................................................97 The Circle 3f Po%er...............................................................................................................>@ +ppendix.................................................................................................................................>9 =isual *ords A Predicates....................................................................................................>9 =isual Phrases........................................................................................................................>> +uditor# *ords A Predicates................................................................................................>> +uditor# Phrases....................................................................................................................>: Binesthetic *ords A Predicates............................................................................................>2 Binesthetic Phrases................................................................................................................>4 Common NLP Terminolog#....................................................................................................>;
Presu!!ositions of NLP
-ntil a little more than 2@@ #ears ago it %as presumed that the earth %as flat. 0efore Columbus, all explorers venturing out to sea needed to be sure and not sail too close to the edge of the %orld, or else suffer the consequences. *e might sa# it %as 'presupposed) that doing so %as dangerous. NLPHs founders and others have done much the same %ith their assumptions about humans and our behavior. The presuppositions of NLP havenHt necessaril# been proven in a hard and fast scientific environment, #et the# have been found to be useful in a great number of their applications. +nd as long as a concept %or s in some context, %e have use for it. The follo%ing are the basic Presuppositions of NLP.
,# -n (n$ S$stem The +lement .or !erson# With The Most Fle/ibilit$ +/erts The Most -nfluence
&lexibilit# in a situation helps to create choice for the individual or the flexible component. *ith regard to the technolog# of NLP, flexibilit# refers almost exclusivel# to choices in methods of communication. The more options one has in communications, the greater li elihood of a successful outcome. This assumption is fairl# self(explanator# in that the degree to %hich a person is open and responsive, %ill directl# correspond to the level of cooperation the# experience.
0# -f *ou (ren1t 2etting The &es!onse *ou Want3 Tr$ Something Different
0andler and ?rinder, NLPHs original founders, studied the philosophies and techniques of man# schools of ps#chological theor# and found that in some context, almost all treatment modalities %or ed. The problem %as, that even in cases %here little or no progress %as made, the therapists persisted. This basic NLP precept goes against the established grain.
9# The &esources (n -n'i5i'ual Nee's To +ffect Change (lrea'$ +/ist Within :im
If an individual has accomplished a goal in a particular context, or, if the# can vividl# relate to someone %ho has, the# can gain access to the resources that %ere used and appl# them in a different context. This is perhaps the most useful of all presuppositions of all because understanding its potential full# allo%s a great deal of flexibilit# in replacing un%anted behavior %ith resourceful behavior.
"<# (n$ Tas8 Ma$ 6e (chie5e' -f 6ro8en -nto Small +nough Chun8s
6ome %asnHt built in a da#. +nd it certainl# %asnHt built b# a single individual. ItHs been proven that large tas s are best tac led b# brea ing them into smaller pieces and addressing each component individuall#.
"%# The Min' (n' The 6o'$ (re (s!ects Of The Same S$stem
This statement might serve to describe the holistic medicine movement. Mental processes affect bodil# functions and ph#sical functions can have profound effects on an individualHs state. &or example, h#pogl#cemia has been no%n to cause metal irritabilit# and even paranoia.
&a!!ort
6apport is the understanding and appreciation of another human beingHs model of the %orld and communicating that understanding bac to them in a %a# that trust is established. 6apport does not mean #ou are in agreement %ith the individual, though #ou ma# be. 6apport comes %hen people are ali e. 3ften this li eness is noticed b# the unconscious mind %ith little or no ac no%ledgment b# the conscious. IsnHt it easier to get along %ith someone #ou have something in common %ith1 In establishing rapport, %e tend to relate to people %ho are li e us not onl# in obvious %a#s but those not so obvious.
2aining &a!!ort
Pacing 6apport is achieved b# pacing. Pacing is the practice of one person emulating another personHs experience of the %orld b#K Matching their external behavior. This ma# be accomplished b# breathing %ith the same depth and rh#thm as the individual. Matching their mood. Matching their posture, gestures, and expressions. 5mulating language patterns. This consists of closel# duplicating tonalit#, cadence, volume and predicates. &inding common ground %ith regard to beliefs, opinions, social and leisure activities, current events, etc. This is not to sa# that #ou should pretend to share opinions %hen #ou donHt. Insincerit# serves onl# to destro# rapport. 9
Though it sometimes doesnHt seem that %a#, our societ# is one of harmon#. Next time #ou are at a social gathering or restaurant, loo at the people around #ou interacting. ItHs relativel# eas# to tell %hoHs in rapport and %ho isnHt. !ince speech patterns, language, and ph#sical actions are often the first things %e notice about people, letHs see ho% %e can gain rapport simpl# being a%are of %hatHs going on around us. Fast-Track Rapport Tips: The more you are like a person, the more they like you. A quick rapport builder is to repeat back the last part of a persons sentence paraphrasin! or, as Richard "andler says, #$arrot $hrasin!.% $ace, pace, pace(lead. or
"reathin! is the most po&erful of all physical rapport skills. 'mulate breathin!.
&eal Worl' +/ercise= Next time #ou find #ourself in a conversation %ith another person, tr# thisK Casuall# as the person for hisJher opinion on various subEects. +s the# respond, notice their ph#siolog#, their tonalit#, tempo, and rh#thm of speech. +re the# enthusiastic about the topic or calm and casual1 A !ood &ay to do this is by becomin! a !ood listener. Notice %hat t#pes of verbs or predicates the# use. +fter the#Hve made a point, confirm %hat the#Hve said b# as ing, '!o %hat #ouHre sa#ing here is,D) then restate the point made using their phrasing. +s #ou listen, assume a posture li e theirs. -se the same gestures the# use. *hen spea ing, emulate their enthusiasm, or lac of it as %ell as their volume and tempo. +s #ou do this #ouHll find that #ou are breathing at a similar rate and depth. 0# no%, #ou %ill have established a strong level of rapport. +t this point #ou %ill find that b# closel# emulating posture, breathing and speech #ou can probabl# miraculousl# predict %hat the person is about to sa#. 10
3nce a strong level of rapport is established #ou ma# %ant to brea rapport b# completel# mismatching the personHs mannerisms, speech, tone of voice etc. FI suggest #ou tr# this onl# %ith a friend %ho %ill later be receptive to #our explanation of the exerciseG
*e constantl# alternate among the rep s#stems as %e ma e our %a# through various dail# experiences. Io%ever, for most of us one s#stem tends to be dominant Fprimar#G. In the -nited !tates approximatel# 42 percent of the population processes visuall#, >2 percent auditoril#, and 2 percent inestheticall#.
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3ne sure %a# to get insight to an individualHs rep s#stems is b# becoming familiar %ithK &e! S$stems & S!eech Patterns ?isual + person %ho processes information visuall# often spea s rapidl#. The# often have a stream of images in their head and construct language based on these pictures. The# are no%n to sometimes use rapid and animated hand movements. =isual people can also become impatient or bored %ith people %ho spea slo%l#. (u'itor$ +uditor# fol s are usuall# quite comfortable %ith language. The# often have a rich vocabular# and enEo# tal ing. The# spea some%hat slo%er than visual people. The# have harmonious speech and ta e the time to find Eust the right %ords. @inesthetic Binesthetic people spea %ith feeling and emphasis. The# too use hand movements and gestures, but more for dramatic effect and to accent the %a# the# feel. Binesthetic fol s ma# sigh a lot %hile spea ing. Their speech can be ver# slo% and deliberate.
,ouHll notice the %arm inner glo% as #ou grasp the firm %heel in #our hands. ,ouHre a%are of the solid, stead# handling as #ou ma e #our %a# along the boulevard. The controls are sensitive to #our touch. The# respond easil#. The feeling of utter pride radiates throughout #our entire bod# sending chills do%n #ou spine. ,ou start #ou ne% car and listen as it gentl# purrs. ,ou sit for a moment in silence, telling #ourself that #ouHve made it. ,ouHll be the tal of the to%n as #ou express #our success quietl#, #et %ithout question. ,our friends ma# squa% , the# ma# tal , the# ma# even shout %hen the# hear that #ouHve received an honorable mention in the %hoHs %ho of classic car histor#. Picture #ourself in this spotless, spar ling, beaut# driving along the main drag. +ll of #our friends %ill notice #ou as #ou sit behind the %heel beaming %ith pride. The blinding gleam shining off the bright chrome bumper %ill reflect the loo in #our e#es as people stop to stare as #ou pass. These examples ma# seem a bit over(emphasi.ed to #ou and I. ,et one or more of them could quite possibl# ma e the difference to someone considering the purchase of a classic car. + savv# salesperson %ith Eust a little NLP training %ould be able to subtl# detect her prospectHs primar# rep s#stem and address him accordingl#. Io%1 Loo at the examples again. The telling %ords and phrases are highlighted for emphasis. Picture #ourself in this spotless, spar ling, beaut# driving along the main drag. +ll of #our friends %ill notice #ou as #ou sit behind the %heel beaming %ith pride. The blinding gleam shining off the bright chrome bumper %ill reflect the loo in #our e#es as people stop to stare as #ou pass. )otice all the *isually oriented &ords and phrases( ,ou start #ou ne% car and listen as it gentl# purrs. ,ou sit for a moment in silence telling #ourself that #ouHve made it. ,ouHll be the tal of the to%n as #ou express #our success quietl#, #et %ithout question. ,our friends ma# squa% , the# ma# tal , the# ma# even shout %hen the# hear that #ouHve received an honorable mention in the %hoHs %ho of classic car histor#. )otice all the auditory references(
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,ouHll notice the %arm inner glo% as #ou grasp the firm %heel in #our hands. ,ouHre a%are of the solid, stead# handling as #ou ma e #our %a# along the boulevard. The controls are sensitive to #our touch. The# respond easil#. The feeling of utter pride radiates throughout #our entire bod# sending chills do%n #our spine. This one is loaded &ith kinesthetic su!!estions( 3ne sure %a# to become a%are of an individualHs rep s#stem is to listen for language indicative of the rep s#stem. +nother %a# to get insight to rep s#stems is b# becoming familiar %ithK
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@inesthetic= Can #ou recall the feeling ofNNNN1 Io% doesNNNNNfeel to #ou1 &eel the sensation ofNNNNN. +/ercise % This exercise authenticates the conclusion dra%n from the first. If #our findings %ere correct in the previous exercise, #ou should see li e patterns in this one. *ith the same participants, 0 role(pla#s as a teacher, customer spouse, brother, sister, etc. and tal s to + for five minutes about something pertinent to the character. &or example, a customer might tal about her experience in a department store. +s before, C stands beside + to corroborate the observations. 5ach 'stor# teller) should ma e a conscious effort to include each of the rep s#stems. 0e sure to include %hat #ou see, hear and feel as #ou relate the experience. The listener ma# as brief questions to clarif# an#thing the stor#teller is sa#ing. 6ound robin, and discuss observations.
Calibration
In simple terms, calibration describes our a%areness of another personHs subtle mannerisms or unconscious ph#siolog#. &or example, I once %or ed for a man %hose upper lip began to t%itch %hen he had to assign unpleasant tas s to people. I came to understand that this %as an indication he %as nervous. It certainl# didnHt mean that ever#one %hose lip t%itches is nervous, but it certainl# did for him +ensory acuity is the terminolog# %e use to describe ho% sharp our senses are. 3ur senses can become finel# tuned so %e notice man# of the fine distinctions people displa# giving us clues to their internal states. -sing calibration, %e are able to discover the relationship bet%een external behavior and internal states. The rep s#stems %e use to calibrate behavior are visual and auditor#. 3bviousl#, I noticed m# bosses lip t%itching b# loo ing at him. 0ut there ma# have been other clues that he %as uncomfortable. Ma#be his nec became red or his face flushed. Iis tone of 18
voice might have changed. Iis speech might have become more rapid. 0eing a%are of changes li e this in a personHs ph#siolog# can tell us a lot. 0ut, it is important to note that such distinctions are for that person onl#. Cues For ?isual Calibration Posture 5#e Movements 0ilateral Cues !#mmetrical or not Particular movements, t%itches Muscle Tension &acial tension 0reathing F6ate, Pauses, =olume, 3bserve mouth, diaphragm A lo%er abdominal movementG ! in Color Lip !i.e Pupil "ilation
Calibration +/ercise In this exercise %eHll be visuall# calibrating to each otherHs li e A disli e in groups of three. 8A Calibrate to li8eA + tells 0 'Thin of someone #ou reall# li e a lot.) + and C calibrate to visual cues %ithout comment.
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%A )A
Se!arator StateA F0rea the mood %ith a funn# stor#, sill# song, etc.G Calibrate to 'isli8eA + tells 0 'Thin of someone #ou disli e.) + and C calibrate to visual cues %ithout comment.
,A 0A
Se!arator State Testing + as s comparative questions such as, '*hich of these t%o people is taller1) Folder, richer, has dar er hair, lives closest, is better loo ing, sa% most recentl#, etc. 0 ans%ers b# nodding. FThis is also a good exercise for noticing e#e accessingG 0 gives immediate feedbac L #es or no. Continue until + has four or five right in a ro%. If + has difficult#, bac up to the beginning and recalibrate.
(u'itor$ Calibration "o the same exercise, but + and C close their e#es and as 0 to ans%er different questions. &or example, %ith e#es closed + as s 0 '*hich of the t%o lives closer to #ou1) 0 responds b# sa#ing, 'IHm thin ing of the person %ho lives closer to me.) -sing auditor# calibration, + and C are to determine %hether 0 is tal ing about the person sJhe li es or disli es. 0rea state bet%een questions. "iscuss the differences in enthusiasm, tonalit#, etc.
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(nchoring
+n anchor is a specific stimulus that evo es a consistent response from an individual. Is there a favorite piece of music or photograph that evo es certain feelings in #ou1 The music or photo is an anchor to the feeling. +nchors occur in all rep s#stems. ?isual (nchors &acial 5xpressions Iand ?estures 5mblems F&lags, logos, etcG Internal and 5xternal Pictures and Photographs (u'itor$ (nchors Music F,our favorite song, '3ur song)G !chool 0ell The !ound of the "entistHs "rill !creen "oor !lamming The !ound of Thunder +dvertising !logans The !ound of the Car in the "rive%a# @inesthetic (nchors The Touch of a Loved 3ne + !pan ing Cool, Clean !heets + 0ac 6ub Olfactor$ (nchors !mell of Lilacs &resh Cut ?rass + Iospital Treatment 6oom ,our &avorite "ish 21
+nchors can be useful to us in man# %a#s. Thin of a time #ou %ere completel# and totall# confident. *ouldnHt it be great if #ou could have access to this resource %henever #ou needed it1 ,ou canO
Setting an (nchor
?aining access to a resourceful state is as simple as eliciting the state and at or near the height of the experience, setting the anchor. This is %here calibration s ills become essential. ,ou %ill need heightened sensor# acuit# to gauge the optimal time for setting the anchor. The most important factors to consider %hen setting an anchor areK Timing Fset near pea stateG -niqueness Fshould be some%hat out of the ordinar#G Intensit# Foptimal, passionate height of stateG Purit# of the !tate Fstrive for maximum state experienceG
(nchoring +/ercise 8. In groups of four, + accesses and anchors three different positive states Fsense of humor, Eo#, love, a%areness, etcG in 0. 0rea state before 22
proceeding to the next. 9. Test each anchor. Calibrate carefull# to each state. " FmetaG notices if + is getting clean states. >. + randoml# fires off one anchor at a time, brea ing state bet%een each anchor. :. C determines %hich state is being elicited. Continue until C ans%ers correctl# four times in a ro%.
Submo'alities
!ubmodalities could be described as the %a# %e code our experiences through our senses. &or example, thin of a special birthda# #ouHve had. Perhaps it %as a da# %hen ever#thing Eust seemed to go great. *hen thin ing of this event, do #ou see pictures, hear sounds or music, experience a feeling or sensation in a particular part of #our bod#1 !ubmodalities describe the qualities of the image, sound or feeling. &or example, if #ou sa% a picture of a group of children gathered around the itchen table of #our house, the qualit# of the picture %ill have a direct influence on #our memor# of the event. Consider the distinctions %ith regard to the !ubmodalities in the maEor rep s#stems. ?isual Thin of a particular event from #our past. +re #ou in the picture FassociatedG or loo ing at the scene from another vantage point FdissociatedG1 Is the picture in color or blac A %hite1 *here is the picture located1 Is the picture a snapshot or panoramic Fcontinuous, life(si.edG1 Is the picture flat or three(dimensional1 23
Is it a still scene or moving1 Is the picture up close, or distant1 *hat shape is the picture1 *hat is the clarit#, contrast and brightness of the picture1
(u'itor$ Thin of the sound of a familiar voice, piece of music or sound effect. Is the sound in stereo or mono1 *hat is the location of the sound in space1 *hat is the volume1 *hat is the tone1 *hat is the speed of the sound1 *hat is the clarit# of the sound1 *hat is the duration and pitch of the sound1
@inesthetic Thin of a familiar sensation. *here is the feeling or sensation located1 *hat is the intensit# of the feeling or sensation1 Is there an# pressure involved %ith the feeling or sensation1 *hat is the densit# of the feeling or sensation1 Could the feeling or sensation be described as having area or volume1 Could the feeling or sensation be described as having texture or %eight1 Io% long does the feeling or sensation last1 "oes the feeling or sensation have a temperature1 "oes the feeling or sensation move around1 24
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To enhance experiences +uditoril#K 1ake the sounds or &ords louder or softer. +peed it up or slo& it do&n. Add your fa*orite music. ,To repro!ram an unpleasant experience, add music that &ould be completely out of context such as a nursery rhyme or party music.. Try makin! it totally silent. 2han!e the tonality
To enhance experiences Binestheticall#K Add li!htness. Add a pleasant odor or fra!rance. Add a pleasant temperature. /ma!ine &hat &ould be pleasant to the touch. /ncrease stillness or mo*ement.
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>. Iave the subEect imagine himself FdissociatedG %ith all of the resources that %ould be needed to experience the situation %ithout the non(supportive aspects. :. Isolate a single frame from this ne% supportive experience. 2. No% have him bring bac the first frame. +s that he bring it up close. Then have the second picture Fthe supportive oneG rapidl# expand blo%ing the first non( supportive image out of sight. 4. &or effect, the practitioner can ma e a 's%ishing) sound as the pictures are s%itching. ;. 6epeat the process five times L faster each time. <. &uture pace to be sure the non(supportive experience is gone.
CSlingshotD ?ariation of the SBish Pattern 8. Iave the subEect associate into the non(supportive experience and isolate a single frame from the scene. 9. Then have him store that picture a%a# in his memor# %here it %ill be easil# accessible. >. Then have the subEect imagine himself dissociated F%atching himself rather than 'being) the subEectG, %ith all of the resources that %ould be needed to experience the situation %ithout the non(supportive aspects. +mong the resources might be confidence, authorit#, courage or others. In other %ords, have him see the negative experience having ta en place %ith perfect results instead of the %a# it actuall# happened. :. No%, have him bring up the non(supportive image and shrin it to a tin# blac and %hite snap shot. Then %al up him and tell him that #ou have a po%erful slingshot %ith the rubber bands attached to his ears. ,ou then place the image of the positi*e outcome into the sling and pull it %a# bac . 2. Iave the subEect place the non(supportive frame directl# in front of him. 4. 6elease the positive image having it shatter the non(supporting. ;. 6epeat the process five times L faster each time. <. &uture pace to be sure the non(supportive experience is gone.
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Test 8. Iave the subEect imagine the situation in the future using the ne% behavior. Calibrate nonverbal cues
*hen heHs finished and safe, stop and hold the final scene as a still picture. Instruct him, 'Let me no% %hen #ouHre there.) 2. No%, have the t%o observers integrate and have that integrated self step into the free.e frame. 6emind them that the# are the #ounger them at the end of the experience. +ssociated, and starting %ith the final scene, run the entire thing backwards in color, in two seconds or less. ,ou ma# repeat this t%o or three times. 0e sure to go bac to the time before the phobic experience Fsafet#G. Iave them see, feel and hear ever#thing thatHs happening. Calibrate to cues. 4. Test the process b# doing an#thing that might access the phobic response, no% and in the future. If #ou still get the phobic response or a partial response, ma e sure that #ouHve done the procedure properl#. If so, repeat steps three through five. +dvise the subEect that caution should be used %ith regard to approaching situations %here the stimulus ma# be present. This %ill give the subEect time to integrate the ne% learning.
the door. Iave him imagine he hears the door opening follo%ed b# light footsteps. +fter a second or t%o the subEect sees the individual he identified %ith the qualit# he desires. >. The individual %ith the qualit# smiles gentl# and as s if the subEect %ould li e to have the qualit# as a gift. The subEect should ans%er in the positive. The individual possessing the qualit# then closes his or her e#es. 0efore long, the individual begins to be surrounded in a circle of colored light. ThereHs no need to mention the color as the subEectHs imagination %ill suppl# that. :. &irst the light is faint but it graduall# intensifies until finall# it is rich and beaming %ith po%er. There is so much po%er coming from the light the subEect can feel if from %here he stands. Then the individual %ith the desired qualit# steps out of the light and invites the subEect to step in. The subEect gladl# does. 2. +t this point the practitioner %ill encourage the subEect to drin in the po%er offered b# the light, to feel it permeating ever# fiber, ever# cell of his being, to absorb the po%er, to feel it and breath it in. These suggestions should be offered until the subEect is sho%ing signs of accepting the po%er. The practitioner %ill be %atching for ph#siolog# such as facial expressions and bod# language indicating acceptance of the qualit#. 4. +t this point the practitioner %ill as the subEect to step out of the circle and allo% the giver of the po%er to step bac in. +s the individual steps bac into the circle the colored light fades. Iave the subEect than the giver of the po%er. Iave the giver %ish the subEect %ell and leave through the door.
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(!!en'i/
?isual Wor's & Pre'icates
+dmire +ppear 0ehold 0lind 0lurred 0lush 0right 0rilliant Clear Cloud# Colorful Conceal "ar "a%n "isappear "ispla# "ra% "im
"ull 5nvision 5xhibit 5xamine &adeFdG &lash &ocus &ogg# ?a.e ?lance ?lare ?leam ?limpse ?listen ?lo% ?raphic Ia.# Illuminate
"emonstrate Illustrate Image Imagine Inspect Li eness Loo Luster Mur # Neat Notice 3bserve 3versight Peer Perspective Picture Portra# Previe%
6eflect 6eveal !cene !ee !ho% !ight !par le !p# !tare !tud# !trobe !unn# -gl# =ie% =isible =ision =ista =ivid
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?isual Phrases
Loo at this Ta e a loo +ppears to me Ta e a pee Illustrate m# point Clear cut In light of Light at the end of the tunnel 0irdHs e#e vie% 5#e to e#e In light of Paint me a picture "ra% a conclusion Ma e a scene MindHs e#e Prett# as a picture 0right prospect 0right future
!hed some light on it Tunnel vision !ight for sore e#es 0e#ond a shado% of a doubt ?lo%ing 6evie% Loo into the matter xxxxxx
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0ooming Call Chatter Chat Cheer Chime Clatter Command Comment Complain Conversation Cr# 3ut
?ro%l ?rumble Iarmoni.e Iarsh Iear Iiss Ium Inquire Insult Lecture Listen Loud
Praise Purr Puiet 6ecite 6emar 6epl# 6esound 6ing 6equest 6esonance 6umor !ang
!qua% Tal Tell Told Tone Tune Translate -tter =erbali.e =ocal =oice ,ell
(u'itor$ Phrases
!ounds good to me I hear #ou IHm all ears Purrs li e a itten 6ings a bell Loud and clear Lend an ear *ord for %ord Manner of spea ing Iold #our tongue =oice #our opinion +rgue the point LetHs tal it over -nheard of !tate #our purpose "escribed in detail The silent treatment Chime in an#time *eHre in harmon# 5cho their sentiments It rings true Tongue(tied -nheard of Iidden message
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@inesthetic Phrases
It feels right IHve got a feeling + concrete idea ?et a feel for Too hot to handle %ith +ll %ashed up Beep #our shirt on Pull some strings !lipped m# mind Connect %ith Measure the impact
IHm not comfortable + solid concept + solid base Ma e the connection Come to grips Control #ourself !tart from scratch !mooth operator 0ac up #our claim
?et the drift *al ing a thin line &irm foundation ?et in touch %ith Iands on ?et a hold of !harp as a tac Tap into Turn around
Meeting of the minds Tic led pin Point it out Moment of panic
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%ith, 'and %hat does that do for #ou1) The repl#K '+llo%s me to feel accepted.) '+nd %hat does that do for #ou1) 6epl#K 'I guess then I feel loved.) Chun ing up can help us to get to the higher value or belief often driving the behavior. Chun ing do%n allo%s us to become more specific or brea tas s into manageable pieces. Congruence *hen a personHs internal representations are in alignment %ith their out%ard behavior %e sa# the# are congruent or displa#ing congruence. &or example, #ou receive an unusual birthda# gift and proclaim ho% much #ou love it, but #our %ords are not congruent %ith #our tonalit# or bod# language. 3pposite of Incongruence. Conscious *a ing state of a%areness. Iumans process seven QJ( bits of information at an# given time %hile conscious. Content The specific details of an event. Conte/t The setting in %hich an event ta es place and provides meaning for content. Cue.s# 0oth verbal and non(verbal information people relate unconsciousl# %hich allo%s others to have access to their internal processing. 0reathing, e#e movement and voice tonalit# might all serve as cues. Dissociation To imagine or re(live an experience from 'outside) of the perspective of an# of the pla#ers. To %atch from a safe perspective. Distortion To represent outside realit# in terms of our individual neurolog#. 0ecause of the limitations of our senses and of personal interpretations of our experiences, distortion of realit# becomes a certaint# in man# cases. "istortion accounts for the man# different e#e%itness accounts of the same event. "isarm +colog$ Ta ing into account the necessar# balance, %hich must be maintained %ithin the self, the people in our lives, and %ith our actual ph#sical environment. &or change to be lasting and effective it must be ecological for ourselves internall# as %ell as for those in our sphere of influence. +licitation To produce a particular state of consciousness in an individual b# providing certain stimuli. 0# eliciting certain behaviors %e can learn both ho% to produce and reproduce desired states, as %ell as gain the understanding needed to%ards neutrali.ing non(productive ones. 38
+$e (ccessing Cues The movement of the e#es in particular directions, %hich indicates the subEectHs use of visual, auditor#, or inesthetic internal processing of images, feelings or sounds. Frame Context, situation, or perspective Future Pace To mentall# rehearse an event. &uture pacing is often done to test the effectiveness of an NLP intervention. &or example, 3ne %ould %ant to future pace an encounter %ith a spider after experiencing the &ast Phobia Cure. 2eneraliEation The relation %e ma e bet%een a ne% person, place, thing, or experience and a familiar one. &or example, #ou ma# never have driven a 6olls 6o#ce, but %ould probabl# assume, based on experiences %ith other cars, that to start one #ou %ould use a e#, to stop, the bra es, etc. ?enerali.ations save us from having to re(learn lifeHs experiences each time %e encounter them. Ma ing inaccurate generali.ations can be the source of difficulties depending on circumstances 2estalt + series of experiences or memories emotionall# connected. -ncongruence *hen a personHs internal representations are out of alignment %ith their out%ard behavior %e sa# the# are congruent or displa#ing incongruence. 3pposite of congruence. -nstallation The process of establishing ne% behaviors %ithin the mind so the# become automatic. This is achieved through gaining rapport, anchoring, h#pnotic language, future pacing and through the use of other techniques. -nternal &e!resentations +ll of the inner processing occurring in our minds as a result of internal dialog, sights, sounds and sensations. @inesthetic 5xternal tactile sensations consisting of feelings, a%areness of balance, gut(level sensations, and abstract emotional a%areness of sentiment, Eo#, loss, etc. leading to direct another to%ard a certain t#pe of action b# first altering #our o%n behavior to emulate theirs, then subtl# changing to the desired behavior. Ma! +n individualHs perception of hisJher realit# as represented via internal representations.
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Matching +dopting the characteristics of another in an effort to establish rapport. Meta +bove, about, be#ond, a higher position. Meta Position To assume the position of an observer. Meta!rograms 0eliefs, habits and behaviors, %hich are dominant over all others. The %a# a person guides and directs other mental processing. Metaprograms refer to internal preferences presiding over motivation, and man# of the %a#s a person sees himJherself. Mirroring 6eflecting a ph#sical behavior bac to its originator. &or example, if #ou %ere sitting directl# across from another person and the# reached up %ith their right hand and scratched their left ear, #ou %ould reach up %ith #our left hand and scratch #our right ear. To simpl# match the movement, #ouHd need onl# to reach for #our ear and scratch it %ith #our right hand. Mismatching To offer an opinion, attitude, belief, or other observation contrar# to the prevailing thought at the moment. Mismatching ma# be used as a pattern(interrupt technique for the purpose of directing a subEect a%a# from non(productive behavior. Mismatching ma# also represent the %a# an individual sorts experiences subEectivel#. In this context, it might be referred to as one of a personHs man# Metaprograms. Mo'el The components of a particular methodolog#$ a paradigm. Mo'eling The practice of reproducing certain actions or behaviors %ith the goal of achieving a similar outcome. Modeling is one of NLPHs foundational concepts. NLP Neuro(Linguistic Programming. The stud# of excellence in both self(communication and communications %ith others. NLP practitioners then record and catalog the man# %a#s people experience the %orld subEectivel#. 0# becoming increasingl# familiar %ith the various patterns people use to ma e sense of the %orld, %e can tailor our communications %ith them accordingl#. Outcome The desired result. Pacing To temporaril# experience anotherHs model of the %orld. + practice designed to 40
gain rapport %ith another. Pacing another involves subtl# emulating breathing, posture, voice, tonalit#, rh#thm, timbre and speed of speech. Parts +n allusion relating to personalit# traits and behaviors. + metaphorical %a# of referencing a particular belief s#stem. &or example, an NLP practitioner might as a subEect to get in touch %ith the part causing the anger. !he then might as that person to 'go %ithin) and as the part if it %ould be %illing to offer more information. Presumabl#, an individual %ould be at peace %ith the %orld %hen all of his parts are in harmon#. Perce!tual Filters =alues, beliefs, experiences and ideas that color a personHs subEective experience. Perce!tual Position +n individualHs personal point of reference. In NLP perceptual positions are commonl# no%n as associated, Ffirst personG second person, and dissociated, Fthird personG. +n individual ma# imagine or re(live an experience from an associated perceptual position. In this case she %ould actuall# envision the experience in the first person. In second position, she %ould experience the perceptions of another person. In third person or dissociated, she %ould %atch the event but not participate. Pre'icates *ords indicating some t#pe of action. In NLP %e can often gain insight into the %a# a person processes subEective input b# the %ords the# use. These %ords frequentl# point to %hich representational s#stem is dominant. &or example, a person ma# sa#, 'I see %hat #ouHre sa#ing.) This statement might indicate that, at least in that moment, the person is in the visual mode. Presu!!ositions + belief that a certain model or belief is true$ an idea that is ta en for granted. 3ne of NLPHs primar# presuppositions, 'The map is not the territor#,) refers to an individualHs subEective experience not being realit# L it is simpl# realit# experienced through their perceptual filters. &a!!ort + sense of affinit# or inship %ith another person. Pacing anotherHs model of the %orld often helps to create rapport. &eframing Changing the context of a concept or experience allo%ing it to have a different meaning. &e!resentations The sensor#(based information humans are consciousl# a%are of.
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&e!resentational S$stems The sensor# s#stems of vision, hearing touch, taste and smell. +lso referred to as 6ep !#stems. &esources 5xperiential tools humans ma# use to arrive at a desired outcome. 6esources ma# include, imagination, past experiences, people, feelings, language, strategies, states, and man# more. &esourceful State The feeling or experience of being in a positive, affirmative state. Secon' Position + point of vie% experienced from another personHs perspective. !ee Perceptual Positions. Sensor$ (cuit$ +%areness through use of the five senses. !ensor# acuit# is experienced in var#ing degrees. State The present mental(ph#sical, holistic, or mind(bod#, condition of an individual. Strateg$ The mental structure of a behavior %hich allo%s the individual to consistentl# obtain the same outcome. To produce a certain result a person must thin and act in the same %a# each time. Their strateg# represents the pattern of thoughts and actions the# ta e in the exact order the# ta e them. Submo'alit$ =ariations people reali.e in representing information to themselves. &or example, one person, %hen as ed to thin of his car, might picture it in vivid color, up close, in a %ide(screen or panoramic vie%. +nother might see their car as a distant, blac and %hite snapshot. +ll of these distinctions are !ubmodalities. The# exist for all of the representation s#stems. Thir' Person + point of vie% outside of the action. !ee Perceptual Positions. Unconscious +ll human experience outside of oneHs present a%areness. ?alue 0eliefs and ideas high in priorit# %ithin a particular context. ?isual The representational s#stem of sight. 42
?isualiEation The abilit# to imagine pictures in oneHs mind. Well-Forme' Outcome The factors and conditions %hich must exist for the s#stematic pursuit of a goal. The criteria for a %ell(formed outcome areK 8. The goal must be stated in the positive. 9. The goal must be defined and evaluated based on sensor#(based evidence. >. The goal must be initiated b# the individual. :. The goal must not interfere %ith an# of the positive aspects of the individualHs life. 2. The goal must be ecological.
&esources #ark Persuasion Techni$ues Scienti%ic Study Method &'erco e Procrastination No( User Friendly Books
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