Given by Science Olympiad

Science Intel Science Talent Search: Mysapce? Facebook? Teen Obe-

Olympiad at States 2007 Competition The Perils of Online Friends sity
News/5 News/3 Op-Ed/6 Science/8

THE STUYVESANT STANDARD

TO THE COMMUNITIES OF STUYVESANT HIGH SCHOOL, TRIBECA, AND BATTERY PARK CITY March 29, 2007
“Your School, Your World—Your News” Visit us at: www.stuystandard.org VOL. 6, No. 12

SING! Review
by Jerry Wang, staff writer ing the next hour. However, de- dance. The dancers were not in
spite the criticisms, the produc- sync, the music was not even of
On Friday, March 23, as the tion was tolerable. The story cen- Indian culture, and the boys
curtain was pulled back to reveal tered on a bunch of prisoners who looked like they would rather be
the first production of the eve- broke out of jail to run away to scrubbing toilets. However, even
ning, Senior SING, the audience Russia. The cast was funny and though the production only lasted
were awed by the bright and crea- believable enough but the set on forty five minutes instead of the
tive set. The story revolved the other hand, encountered many normal hour, compared to last
around a terrorist group made up problems. A prop fell during the years’ Soph Frosh, this one was
of vegetables threatening to de- middle of a scene, not so bad.
stroy King Burger’s land and its the microphone
inhabitants. The cast was amazing
“Overall, it could be The Junior pro-
stopped working, duction was last
and gave great performances. The forcing us to strain
seen that all grades but certainly not
costume crew did a fantastic job to hear the chorus had given tremen- least. The scen-
making the various attires ranging sing during the Jazz ery with the
from a burger costume to a pickle dous amounts of ef-
dance, and com- clown drawn
getup. All the dance crews were pared with the other
fort into one of the background and
spectacular. The dancers were in productions, the largest productions.” the big paper
sync and the band played some scenery fell short of mashay hand
great tunes. Personal favorites outstanding. All the was very well
based on the audiences’ claps dance crews did fairly well, with done. The story centered on one
were Indian dance, Irish dance, the exception of the Step crew circus’s competition with another
and Swing. Overall, the story was and the Indian dance crew. The circus that just moved into town.
creative with funny jokes in be- Step crew was amazing and the The cast did a wonderful job and
tween, a spectacular cast, and incorporation of a battle between the dancing was amazing. Favor-
SING! Is an annual production put on great dance crews.
by Stuyvesant students. There are three the dancers was a fresh and very ites included but were not limited
Next up was Soph-Frosh trendy idea. Even without music,
competing groups: seniors, juniors,
and sophomores and freshman.
SING! and based on reviews of they were unbelievably great and
the performance on Wednesday, enjoyable. However, the same INTERVIEW continues on
many did not expect to be enjoy- could not be said of the Indian page 2

Policy Changes in Stuy Interview with Naomi Hinchen

by Jennifer Schlesinger, reflect the new policy. by Allen Wang, staff writer came up.
editor in chief The spring college trip has TSS: Were there any particular
been cancelled. It was supposed to Naomi Hinchen, a senior at q u e s t i o n t h a t yo u fo u n d
In recent weeks, there have allow students to visit colleges in Stuyvesant High School, was interesting during the show?
been some changes in Stuyvesant the Mid-Atlantic region. The can- recently a contestant on the game
Naomi: There was one where they
High School’s administrative poli- cellation was announced in the show Jeopardy. Hinchen, as well showed a map of Australia, and
cies. Unfortunately, for many of Parents Association (PA) Bulletin as 14 other teens from across the from seeing the map you would
these changes proper notification and on the Class of ’08 website, nation, participated in the annual know the answer without even
was not been given out and reasons where reasons were given. Stuyve- Teen Jeopardy tournament. After reading the clue. On the show,
behind the change are unknown. sant Principal, Stanley Teitel, had coming from behind to win her there’s a pause as we all look at it
The Student Union (SU) insti- delegated the responsibility of col- quarterfinal match, Hinchen lost in and think, “That’s way too easy. It
tuted a new policy that all Sing! lege trips to Eleanor Archie, the the semifinals to eventual must be a trick question.” You
tickets had to be paid for with Assistant Principal of Pupil Af- champion David Walter of don't really notice the pause as
checks. No concrete reason for the fairs. She has been sick and re- Wilmington, Delaware. Here, she much when it’s on TV, but I’m
new policy has been given, but it cently returned to Stuyvesant, shares with us her thoughts about sure the entire studio audience was
has been suggested that the ad- leaving little time for planning. this event. wondering why no one rang in
ministration thought checks were Moreover, the dates set for the trip sooner.
safer because they could not be were during spring break. Because The Stuyvesant Standard: What TSS: What do you think you
stolen as easily as cash. Unfortu- the dates contained a religious did you do to prepare for the gained from this experience? What
nately, proper notification of the holiday and were when many go show? Any specifics? are your plans in the future in
change was not given to ticket on vacation, there were concerns Naomi: I didn't do any sort of terms of game shows, contests and
purchasers. Up to last year, tickets over getting enough chaperones. formal preparation at all; I etc.?
could be paid for either in cash or Furthermore, because of the recent figured that cramming wasn’t
Naomi: The best thing that I
with a check. Both the ticket- addition of guidance counselors, going to help right before the gained from the experience was
buying website, www.singtix.com, Archie has more responsibilities. show, and I wouldn’t have known making friends with the other con-
and the Class of 2008’s website, The Junior President, Michelle what to study anyway. But my testants. I don’t have any specific
www.stuy08.com failed to mention parents made sure that I knew the
this at first. Later, the Class of name of the new U.N. Secretary INTERVIEW continues on
2008’s website was changed to POLICY continues on page 3 General, Ban Ki-Moon, in case it page 2
2 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 NEWS

EDITORIAL
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD
Founded 2001
 

THE STUDENT UNION

 

“Your School, Your World—Your News”

Earlier this year, we reported on the inconsistencies at Student Union
Executive Leadership Team budget meetings. The right people failed to attend; other people voted in
their place. Minutes from the meeting could not be produced, and
attendance could not be provided. We’re happy to say that, almost three
DR. JOHN NIKOL FACULTY ADVISER
JENNIFER SCHLESINGER EDITOR IN CHIEF months later, some of our concerns are finally being looked into.
DEREK WENG MANAGING EDITOR We applaud President George Zisiadis’s decision to make changes
KHOI NGUYEN CHIEF FINANCIAL OFFICER in his second-term cabinet. Just because were appointed once does not
FANNY TANG LAYOUT EDITOR mean that they are automatically guaranteed the same job again,
DANNY ZHU COPY CHIEF especially if they fail at their basic duties, such as attending meetings.
JIMMY ZHANG NEWS EDITOR However, two developments trouble us. For one, nowhere in the Student
PRISCILLA MELO OPINIONS EDITOR Union’s constitution does it say that appointments are made on a term-
EMMA RABINOVICH ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR by-term basis. Secondly, it was mentioned that the lone attendance file
ERIC MAYO SPORTS EDITOR
JOSEPH KRUTOV SCIENCE EDITOR
was on a hard drive that became corrupted. Valuable files such as these
HANFORD CHIU BUSINESS EDITOR should be backed up. The Student Union cannot risk losing files due to a
LADA KUKUY LITERARY EDITOR computer crash.
DANNY ZHU WEBMASTER We also applaud the Student Union’s decision to look into its
BENNETT HONG DIRECTOR OF PHOTOJOURNALISM constitution. We have reported on many of the flaws that the document
DANIEL EGERS (‘03) FOUNDER possesses, and a subcommittee is a step in the right direction. The
ERNEST BASKIN (‘04) EDITOR EMERITUS subcommittee should take a look at Issues 6 and 8 as a starting point for
discussion.
Publication Stuyvesant is lucky to have a Student Union so dedicated to its
student body, something which the general population should take
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD is a nonprofit and nonpartisan publication pro- greater advantage of. By fixing the flaws in the budget process as well as
duced by the students of Stuyvesant High School. outlining the specific duties of each officer, the Student Union can fulfill
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD distributes 2,000 free copies on a bi-weekly its duty as the representatives of the student body.
basis to the students and faculty of Stuyvesant High School and through-
out the adjoining neighborhoods of TriBeCa and Battery Park City. The Stuyvesant Standard
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD welcomes letters from its readers.
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD reserves the right to edit any published mate-
rial. The viewpoints of contributors do not necessarily reflect the views of
the Standard staff. INTERVIEW many times when I didn't get a
continued from page 1 question because I couldn’t ring in
Copyright ©2006 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD soon enough. Also, I would have
plans to go on other game shows thought over my wagers a little
Contact Us — in fact, I’m forbidden to go on more, because I was really terrible
at wagering. But other than that, it
any others for six months — but I
Please direct all correspondence to: was luck of the draw. In the first
was recently in the National Vo-
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD cabulary Champi- round I got a total
345 Chambers Street of $2800 for
onship, though I
New York, NY 10282-1000 “The best thing I knowing my car-
didn't win any-
[email protected] toons, and in the
thing. gained from the
Find us on the web at www.stuystandard.org second round I
TSS: You said
“making friends” experience was kne w I was
Advertising was the best thing. making friends screwed when I
If you would like to advertise in THE STUYVESANT STANDARD, please e-mail Can you describe looked up and the
with the other last two categories
[email protected] to request an advertisement form. We offer that a bit?
a broad range of options including full color capability for your advertis- Naomi: It was contestants” were Biology and
ing needs. really great to French. And then
Naomi Hinchen
meet so many in- the next group got
Jeopardy Contestant
teresting people, a category where
Subscription and we had a lot of they could only
fun hanging out together before, answer two of the five clues, and I
during and after the taping. After- knew every single one.
THE STUYVESANT STANDARD wards there were a few jokes about TSS: How did you feel losing in
SUBSCRIBE TODAY the outcome, such as when we the semifinals? What were your
1 YEAR — $15 were playing Apples to Apples and overall reactions?
Delivery Information David played a card that said “My Naomi: I was disappointed, but
Name:______________________________________________ Bank Account,” but there were no not so much because I lost as
Address:____________________________________________ hard feelings about who beat because I didn’t do better. But then
___________________________________________________ whom. Frank was on the next show and
Billing Information TSS: You played extremely well just barely lost because he
Please circle your choices below: during the quarterfinals, but not as miscalculated his wager, and I
Check Money Order Cash well during the semifinals. If you think that’s a much worse situation
Billing Address:______________________________________ were to done something differently to be in. If that had been me, I
___________________________________________________ the second time, whether it be pre- would still be kicking myself over
Please cut and mail to THE STUYVESANT STANDARD, 345 Chambers paring or anything if any, what it. At least losing by a lot means
Street, New York, NY 10282-1000 OR send the above informa- would it be? that I don't have to think “If I had
tion to [email protected]. Naomi: Firstly, I would work on just done X, Y and Z I could have
my buzzer reflexes. There were so won.” ◙
 NEWS March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 3

THE STANDARD NEWS

Intel Science Talent Not the Usual Intel
Search Champion Finalists
by Liwei Mao, staff writer was able to split light and use a by Hesham Saleh, staff writer Why has there been such a drastic
camera to record the resulting change in finalists over the past
Each year, thousands of high spectra. Although there were limits The Intel Science Talent few years? First, New Yorkers
school students send in their of the inexpensive laser she used Search dinner, in which the top 40 were common finalists because
application to the Intel Science as her light source, she could make finalists were commemorated for they had the benefit of the subway
Talent Search competition; 300 relatively accurate measurements. their work, took place on March system, which allowed them to
semifinalist and 40 finalists are A senior at Westmore High 13. For the third year in a row, easily travel to laboratories or
chosen of them. This year’s School in Oklahoma City, Mary is neither Stuyvesant High School hospitals to conduct their research.
finalist, Mary Masterman, was hoping to enroll at either Stanford students nor Bronx High School of But now, the Internet has nearly
awarded a $100,000 scholarship on or MIT. Science students attended. eliminated this advantage by
March 13 in Washington for John Pardonfrom Chapel Hills Although Bronx Science and making communication easier.
successfully building a home-made High School in North Carolina Stuyvesant students were the Second, most rural high schools
spectrograph. won second place “expected” finalists for this have started research programs
A spectro- and a $75,000 prestigious competition, that is no designed to motivate and teach
graph is an optical “One spectroscope longer the case, due to an increase
scholarship for his students about scientific studying.
instrument that could cost as mathematics re- in research programs in most high The fact that more students from
uses the light fre- must as $100,000. search of the un- schools. different areas are receiving better
quencies emitted folding of simple The Intel competition is educations is outstanding, and has
by heated particles Mary was able to spreading
closed curves. excited many
to identify mole- build the spectro- Dmitry Vaintrob throughout the teachers and prin-
cules. A standard was awarded third nation’s high cipals. Valerie J.
spectroscope can
scope at home for schools. Previ-
place for his pro- Reidy, principal of
cost as much as merely $300.” ject in mathemat- ously, most Bronx Science,
$100,000. Mary ics involving loop high schools said “Am I happy
was able to build the spectrograph homology. that competed that our kids aren’t
at home for merely $300. In total, over 1,700 contestants in this program winning first
“I wanted to build one that entered the competition this year. were situated in prizes? No. But
was lower-costing so it would be The 40 finalists each received a New York City, that it’s traveling
available to anyone interested,” personal computer and a scholar- but this has far and wide and
Mary said. “The most challenging ship of at least $5,000. New York, changed. Now other kids are get-
part was trying to get it to work.” as in the previous years, had the there are 24 ting hooked, I’m
According to Mary, the spec- largest number of finalists. Twelve other h i g h The top 10 finalists of the Intel Science thrilled about that.”
trograph took her three months to New Yorkers were finalists; none schools that Talent Search 2007. Stanley Teitel,
build and another three months to of them, unfortunately, were from have finalists principal of Stuyvesant, expressed
Source: http://www.sciserv.org/sts/index.asp

get working. She found machining Stuyvesant. Two of these students on the top 40 list. Some of these similar feelings. “They are not
the parts and aligning the optics to schools are just outside the city,
be the most challenging part of the while others are in the Midwest,
project. The end result, however, INTEL CHAMPION such as the Illinois Mathematics INTEL FINALISTS
was rewarding. Her spectrograph continues on page 4 and Science Academy. continues on page 4
POLICY ended because of the differences in
Principal Autonomy continued from page 1 classes and teaching style. Any
complaints with the policy should

Increased Lee, is pushing for a college trip to

the Mid-Atlantic region early next
year in order to make up for the
be addressed to the Assistant Prin-
cipals.
This term, parents were not
by Jerry Wang, staff writer disparaged. Eric Nadelstern, chief missed trip. given the opportunity to visit on a
executive of the school system’s In response to concerns about school day and see classes. This is
Power. For centuries, men empowerment initiative was too much homework being given a traditional part of Open School
have fought over it, and people criticized for over two hours. to students during vacation, a new Week. It took place up to the fall
have died for it. What exactly is Councilmember John Liu believes policy was but into place. It was term of this school year. Unfortu-
meant by power? For kings, it that Nadelstern’s efforts are all talk announced on the PA’s website. nately, very limited notice was
means more land; for businessmen, and no action. The new policy is the product of given out, leading many parents to
it means money, but what does it As Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben collaboration between Teitel, the show up at Stuyvesant. These par-
mean for a principal? Mayor used to say, “With power, comes Student Leadership Team, and the ents were told by the security
Bloomberg’s administration is great responsibility.” Schools teachers. The policy says that guards that the event was cancelled
planning on giving New York City Chancellor Joel I. Klein tried to teachers must not give more home- and they could not enter the build-
public school principals more reason with the critics by starting a work than necessary for students to ing. The only notification was a
autonomy starting September. new program called the remember what they have learned. sentence in the PA’s March Bulle-
However, New York Cit y Achievement Reporting and Furthermore, ample time must be tin. Most parents had not yet re-
lawmakers are condemning the Innovation System which will hold given to complete any projects ceived the bulletin via mail. The
decision and justifying their principals accountable for their either before or after break so that PA did announce to its e-mail list
opinion by stating that there were schools’ results. A five-year, $80 students who are unable to work that the bulletin was up. However,
not enough achievements made by million contract with I.B.M. will can still do the assignment. More- many parents are not on the mail-
principals that deserved additional over, no assignments may be given ing list. In general, parents feel that
authority this year. Those who that mandate visiting places in
AUTONOMY proper notification should have
support the choice are being New York. The policy is open-
continues on page 4 been sent out. ◙
4 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 NEWS
INTEL CHAMPION
continued from page 1
made it to the top ten.
Bronx Fire Worst in 17 Years
by Dennis Ng, staff writer occupants to leave. The woman March 12. Muslim prayers were
Catherine Schlingehyde, from from the apartment where the fire held during a brief service.
Oyster Bay High School, won On March 7 at 11 p.m., a fire started unknowingly ran to the Hundreds of mourners gathered to
fourth place for her research in broke out in the Bronx, killing ten upper apartments with the door pay respect to the dead, including
micro-RNA repression pathways. people, nine of whom were opened behind her, allowing the Senator Hillary Clinton and Mayor
The other New Yorker, Rebecca children. It was the worst fire in fire to spread more quickly. The Michael Bloomberg. Four of the
Kaufman, from Croton-on Hudson, New York City in 17 years. After three adults in the house attempted children and their mother were to
was fifth place for her medicine ignition, the fire quickly raced to put out the fire and made other be flown to Mali for burial. The
and health project dealing with the through the four-story, multifamily phone calls before dialing 911, funeral was paid for by the New
effects of male hormones in rela- house in the Highbridge section of which wasted precious time. York Yankees. ◙
tion to sclerosis. Of the top ten the Bronx. The fire raged for Firefighters arrived approximately

Source: 1010Wins
finalists, six were female. Intel nearly two hours before it was three minutes after they were
Chairman Craig Barrett said he extinguished by 150 firefighters. called and faced other obstacles,
was “heartened by the fact that The severity of the fire was such as a chained door in the back
more women were finalists and top worsened not by the size of the of the house. However, the
10 winners this year than in any house, but rather by poor human building did not appear to have any
year since Intel assumed the title oversight. The fire was most likely violations and no complaints were
sponsorship in 1998. When I meet caused by a space heater causing filed regarding unsafe conditions.
young scientists like Mary, John, the building’s wiring to overheat. Nine of the ten victims were
Dmitry and the other Intel STS The building, built in 1901, had children. One of them survived the
finalists, I know that the future of only one staircase and no fire fire but later died at the hospital. A
American innovation is bright.” ◙ escapes, making it difficult for the funeral was held for the victims on
The severity of the fire was worsened
by poor human oversight.

Clinton on the Move for Women Voters

by SangHee Chung, columnist record of any gender they would look at the candidate
Source: Yahoo News

discrimination in the workplace, as a whole.

While in the race for the she was most honored for her “The XX chromosome alone
presidency, Democrat Hillary policy on national security, which is probably not enough to win the
Rodham Clinton will be attempting created more allies than enemies. female vote,” said Phil
to draw in the majority of voters, “I hope you'll join me on the Trounstine from San Jose State
namely women, on her campaign campaign trail,” she said. “When University. “All other things
as the first female president. we throw open the doors of being equal, women voters tend
“Today, women are a majority opportunity and break those glass to favor women candidates, but
of the voters, a majority of ceilings, then we give everyone in women voters are not one-
students in college, and we are a America a chance to be all that he dimensional. They’re going to
growing presence in the Congress. or she can be.” look at a whole variety of
But there are still far too few Some women, including characteristics and assets that a
women in leadership positions,” Ellen Malcolm, founder of candidate has.”
Clinton said at a luncheon in Emily’s List, believed that a A new website has also
Emily’s List, an organization woman like Clinton was needed launched for women as a means
raising mone y for female in office. to “offer a real opportunity for
candidates favoring abortion “We need her influence, her her in getting the Democrat
rights. power, her expertise, her nomination.” The website, which
Clinton hopes that the national experience in the White House,” c a n b e f o u n d a t
Clinton gives a speech during her government will work toward Malcolm said. www.icanbepresident.com, links
campaign. She hopes to win a large equal pay for women. Although However, others believed to Clinton’s campaign Web page,
percent of women voters as the first she criticized the Bush that a female candidate would not allowing users to support and
female president of America. administration for failing to keep win the females over. Rather, learn more about her policies. ◙

AUTONOMY I.B.M. contract, acknowledging INTEL CHAMPION certain behaviors of firstborn chil-
continued from page 1 the complaints of no-bid contracts. continued from page 1 dren. Other ideas were more fun
Last year, a $15.6 million no-bid and theoretical. Daniel Mark, for
allow the city to see every contract with consulting firm Alva- going to allow me to monopolize example, used math to prove that
individual student’s progress in rez Marsal was signed. In an effort this competition, and I think that’s aliens would not be able to use
school. The program will be to help save money for the admini- wonderful,” he said. modern technology to monitor the
running by September and will stration, Alvarez Marshal advised Natalie Kvetyana, a senior Earth.
give each principal a letter grade a change in bus routes. The ad- who participated in this year’s The Intel competition has
from A to F to show if principals ministration supported the idea, competition, said, “We might have been a success since it was
are meeting the standard education leading to complaints from angry started off the Intel roller coaster, founded in 1941. Six Intel
performance. parents and coun- but more schools are jumping finalists have gone on to win
Principals who fail aboard. It doesn’t matter. All of us
can be removed
“Starting September c i l m e m b e r s . love to do research.”
Nobel Peace Prizes. But more
Councilmen Jack- importantly, the competition has
from their schools. 2008, even parents son and Garodnick This year’s finalists have motivated students all around the
Starting September can track their both used the inci- made significant attempts in con- nation to conduct research and
2008, even parents dent as a reason in tributing to science. Some created contribute to the world. In the
can track their
child’s progress us- devices that would help the dis-
rejecting the deci- words of Leon M. Lederman, a
child’s progress ing the system” sion to increase abled. For example, John Granata Physics Nobel laureate, “We also
using the system. principals’ auton- created a device that allows dis- have to have innovation if we’re
James Liebman, the school system omy. Many council members are abled persons to communicate going to survive, so you have to
chief’s accountability officer stated upset and concerned that the ad- using brain waves. nurture the gifted kids.” ◙
that the administration has already ministration chose not to discuss Other projects studied the per-
received 19 bids from major the changes concerning the princi- sonalities of humans. Ashley Bah-
technology systems regarding the pals with them and the parents. ◙ nkan tried to find answers about
 NEWS March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 5

Confession to 9/11 FACULTY FOCUS: COUNSELOR

by Timothy Tong, staff writer language of the war is victims.”
According to a revised
He then made an interesting
analogy, referring to how some
Ms. Ferrer
transcript released by the United “consider George Washington as by SangHee Chung, columnist writer and being able to know the
States military, mastermind hero. Muslims many of them are
terrorist Khalid Sheikh students beyond their transcript.
considering Osama bin Laden. He Raised in Queens and Long “We go to the core of who
Mohammed confessed to many is doing same thing. He is just Island, Diana Ferrer may be new
attacks and plots of terrorism in a the student really is as a person to
fighting. He needs his at Stuyvesant High School, but provide a well-rounded
forceful declaration. independence.” she is certainly not a newcomer to
The list of 31 maliciously assessment,” she said. “It’s very
Mohammed has been college advising. She started her exciting. I love it.”
planned attacks included plans to questioned thoroughly by the career as a college counselor and
assassinate Pope John Paul II, Her only complaint about
military tribunal. Despite his received the bulk of her expertise Stuyvesant is the commute, which
President Clinton, and Pakistani claims that the CIA tortured him working for 10 years at the
president Pervez Musharraf. He takes 90 minutes on a daily basis.
to extract information, the CIA Manhattan Center for Science and Upon arriving at the school,
also revealed his plans to attack denied it, saying that it used legal Math. Afterwards, she worked as
the Sears Tower, the Empire State Ferrrer’s typical day involves
“interrogation practices.” A 26- a counselor for the Bronx High working for two to three periods
Building, the New York Stock page revised transcript was School of Science and worked in
Exchange, the Panama Canal, Big on SSRs. She spends the rest of
released, evoking surprise and Region 1 in the Bronx, serving all the time working with individual
Ben, and Heathrow Airport, triumph, as well as nervousness the schools in the area.
which are all densely populated students, answering phone calls
about the future. So far, Ferrer has found her from parents, and keeping up
places that are significant to the Mohammed is just one of 14 transition into Stuyvesant to be
economic society of the Americas with records to make sure that
alleged terrorists who were smooth and very natural. s t u d e n t s a r e me e t i n g t h e
and Britain. In addition to those, caught. They will be tried, and if “My peers
Mohammed took full graduation standards.
declared “enemy combatants,” are very
responsibility for “the 9/11 they will be punished receptive,” she “I want to give Stuy- “When I work with
students, I want to
operation from A to Z.” He was accordingly. Two other captured said. “They vesant students a
also involved in the 1993 World make them feel like
alleged terrorists, Abu Faraj al- have made they’ve accomplished
Trade Center truck bombing. tremendous sense of self-
Libi and Ramzi Binalshibh,
There was also the beheading of refused to attend the hearings, efforts to reach confidence and have something,” she said.
“They’re all very
American journalist Daniel Pearl, out and help
who was working on a story
making the situation for them a an appreciation for bright and intelligent,
“lose-lose situation.” ◙ and train me but the y’re all
about Islamic militancy in whenever they their talents.”
Pakistan when he was abducted different. I want to
can.” Diana Ferrer give them a sense of
and murdered in January 2002.
Source: Corbis

A l t h o u gh Guidance Counselor self-confidence and

Videos and pictures have been Ferrer only
released all over the Internet and have an appreciation
started at for their talents. Overall, I want
show Mohammed holding the Stuyvesant this spring term, she
head. In his confession spree, he to make sure they are happy
has already developed a fondness beings. They shouldn’t compete
even took responsibility for the for the students. She felt that
bombing of a Kenya beach resort against each other, but against
there is a very diverse and themselves — to be the best that
in 2002 and for the bombing of a multitalented student body at
nightclub in Bali in 2002. they can be.”
Stuyvesant. When she is not busy
Despite the obvious “They’re leaders and young ado-
malignance of these actions, assisting students and parents,
lescents maximizing their poten- Ferrer spends her time outside of
Mohammed stated that his main Al-Qaeda operative Khalid Sheik Mo- tials,” she said. “It’s extremely the building reading, talking
guiding force is his religion. hammed shortly after his capture. The stimulating.” walks, going to the theater and
Although he said that “Islam mastermind of the 9/11 attacks, he Her favorite thing about enjoying the natural environment
doesn’t give a ‘green light’ to confessed his role in the Daniel Pearl working at Stuyvesant is her around her. ◙
killing” (implying the killing of killing and 29 other terror plots.
opportunity to work as an SSR
children), he also stated that “the

Science Olympiad States Competition at West Point

by James Zhang, news editor minute-opportunity to do some last On March 10, the day of medal in Designer Genes. When
-studying and catch up with a well most of the events, members woke the long-awaited awards ceremony
On March 9, while most delayed sleep schedule. As a up early to prepare for the big day. came along, the members were
people were still slaving away in noncompetitor, I was able to Many had very few hours of sleep. ecstatic when it was announced
school, the Stuyvesant Science observe much of the inner Valery Li, president, complained that Stuyvesant won 10th place.
Olympiad team prepared to leave workings of the competition of her 46 minutes of sleep. Alvis This was the best Stuyvesant’s
for the biggest event of the year: without having to feel the pressure. Yuen boasted of his being able to Science Olympiad team had ever
the states competition. Members Noncompetitors occupied their get over three hours of sleep. Be- performed in the states
have been preparing for this day time by watching tech events, sides those who were studying, competition. Stuyvesant came
since the beginning of the school which were often exciting. The some noncompetitors demon- forth as the highest-ranked school
year. Disappointed at their fourth- Sumobots in particular were the strated unconstrained altruism, of New York City, defeating long-
place ranking at the regional com- highlight of the tech events. The making coffee runs to aid wearied time rival Townshend Harris High
petition, the team was determined competition has 25 events, which teammates. I, on the other hand, School, who was ranked first place
to win. This spirit even passed cover most of the major science teamed up with a few other observ- in the regional competition. On the
over to noncompetitors, who, in topics, such as physics, biology ers and had the most fun we could bus ride going home, nearly
some cases, were even more and chemistry. Each team is have, even kicking a competitor everyone was asleep, fatigued
thrilled than the actual competi- allowed only 15 competing out of our room. from the two days of studying and
tors. members, and at most seven can be In the end, this late-night competing. However, there is no
The Science Olympiad seniors. In the end, every cramming paid off and the Science doubt that, even while asleep, they
team departed Stuyvesant for a competitor has to be able to Olympiad was able to earn medals were extremely content with this
hour bus ride to West Point.-three .compete in more than one event in five events, including a gold
Many competitors used this year’s victory. ◙
6 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 OPINIONS

OPINIONS
Why the STUY VOICE
Disregarding All Direction
‘F-Word’? by Amna Ahmad, columnist Don’t ask the person giving you
the survey any questions. Do not
would indeed be evident, and I am
nearly certain that reading
by David Mannes, staff writer Our lives are centered largely answer any questions. Then hand directions would be the last thing
around exams. We learn to know in your paper.” Interestingly on students’ minds, as they
Recently, at the Conservative the College Board better than our enough, 76 percent of students disregard all directions to show off
Political Action Conference, Ann own grandparents. We go to prep chose to answer the questions pro- what they “really” know, as if it
Coulter enraged many people with programs, forcing our parents to vided on the test paper when all mattered.
the following comment: “I was invest ridiculous sums of money to they needed to do to pass was Needless to say, the students
going to have a few comments on improve our test-taking abilities. In write their name, leaving the ques- taking my “exam” displayed some
the other Democratic presidential fact, we are so concentrated on tions blank. inappropriate behavior. As the test
candidate John Edwards, but it test-taking that we are able to sit I think that perhaps it is fair to “proctor” I was bombarded with
turns out you have to go into rehab glued to the seat of a cold, rusty attribute this trend of tackling the questions although the directions
if you use the word ‘f-----,’ so I — metal chair conveniently decorated questions first rather than reading had overtly stated that students
so kind of an impasse, can’t really with assortments of gum and graf- the directions to the idea that the were not permitted to ask me any
talk about Edwards.” fiti for three hours or sometimes main goal of tests is to get the right questions. In addition to the shak-
It was pointless for Coulter to more just to make a few marks on answers. Yet on some tests there ing, twitching, and sweating that I
call John Edwards this word. She paper. It is my personal opinion are multiple correct answers, but had witnessed throughout the
clearly has strong political be- that tests are generally neither a just one that is “the most correct,” course of administering the tests, I
liefs, and is most likely capable measure of competency in a field, as can be seen in the critical read- watched as students aggressively
of presenting an intelligent argu- nor credible in deciphering intelli- ing section of the SAT, for in- chewed on the pens that I had
ment. While that would not have gence. Accordingly, I decided to stance. Test answers over the years given them to use. When I re-
gotten her as much publicity as give a focus group of Stuyvesant have also been written biasedly, minded one student that the pen
her controversial joke, it would students the first fair test that they utilizing subjective terms that we she was chewing on was mine, she
have probably convinced a lot had probably ever encountered. are all too commonly expected to hastily removed the pen from her
more people to agree with her. Unfortunately, the majority of stu- identify, although such terms can- mouth and made a gesture as
In her defense Coulter said dents failed. not logically be presented in con- though she were shamefully offer-
that the word is a “schoolyard The test that I had adminis- junction with facts, but rather opin- ing it back, slobber and all. I’m not
taunt.” She also said that she was- tered served no purpose other than ions on a topic. sure if pen-loaners are typically
n’t speaking in a way that was to test the ability of students to Perhaps I hadn’t noticed what expected to accept chewed-up pens
offensive to homosexuals, but follow directions. I gave the stu- a nervous test taker looked like, or back from those who borrowed
rather to suggest that John Ed- dents a test paper and told each of the extent of blatancy of our them, but I surely did not. ◙
wards is a “wuss.” them these exact words: “Fill this obsession with tests, because I had
Sadly, this horrible word has out and follow directions. You are Followed
never actually had a chance to look directions
become a schoolyard taunt, a fact not allowed to ask me any ques- (Passed test)
around the room at all of my
that anyone walking around Stuy- tions.” The directions on the test Did not follow
classmates during a test, but I directions
vesant can attest to. However, paper were as follows “Put your (Failed test)
assume that similar behaviors
I’ve heard students at Stuyvesant name on the top of the paper.
use a lot worse than this as a

Perils of Finding an Online Friend

taunt. Just because kids use a
phrase as an insult, it doesn’t
make that phrase appropriate or
politically correct. MySpace, Facebook and physiological problem, but also
Source: Facebook

Although Coulter shouldn’t Sconex are just a few of the an unnecessary distraction from
have used the word in reference websites that teenagers use daily more important things like
to John Edwards, she clearly did- to find friends or potential mates. family, friends and schoolwork.
n’t mean what she said as an in- Personal information such as their Online predators are more
sult to homosexuals. John Ed- full name, age, home address and common than they used to be,
wards is married with kids, so the even cell phone number are mainly due to the fact that
insult wasn’t directed at Edwards’ shown to attract web users. As if teenagers are more trusting of
sexuality. In addition, Coulter that isn’t enough, teenagers post “outsiders.” At first, predators
stood up for gay rights at another suggestive photos of themselves pretend to be friendly, accepting
point in the same speech. Although the Internet is a great tool
for information, online predators may for the world to see. This and sympathetic people. As their
Coulter did make one really abundant amount of information re lationshi p deve lops into
use information posted on online com-
good point about the joke, and munities to their advantage. might be useful for a fellow something more complex, the
that was that it wasn’t only a joke class ma te t o c ont act tha t predator will pounce and pressure
about John Edwards. The state- individual for homework help or its “prey” in illicit activities by
by Hui Ting Jiang, staff writer
ment was also mocking the fact clarification on a l esson. providing money, lavish gifts,
that an actor on the show Grey’s The Internet is probably one However, that is not the case attention and promiscuously
Anatomy, Isaiah Washington, of the greatest inventions ever. It most of the time. Information, taken photos. Usually, teenagers
was forced to receive counseling not only connects people halfway such as that listed above, is cave into the pressure and
after calling a fellow actor this around the world, but also allows usually used by predators and unwillingly do things they
degrading term. The people who information to be sent in bulk stalkers to follow their prey. normally would not do.
got angry over what she said instead of the old-fashioned mail An anonymous freshman A show recently done by
overreacted to a joke about how or fax. The Internet is not only a confided to me that she stalks NBC called “To Catch A Predator
form of exchanging ideas, but a “[her] crush on MySpace and
form of sharing information as Facebook every single day.” This
VULGARITY well. Sadly, this information is is not only indicative of a ONLINE PERILS
continues on page 7 sometimes illicit or inaccurate. continues on page 7
 OPNIONS March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 7
VUGLARITY
continued from page 6 HPV: The Human “Promiscuity”
people overreact when the word
is used.
Coulter’s intention in making
Virus Vaccine?
this joke was to get publicity. by Alvis Yuen, columnist push for mandatory vaccination, rusty nails. On the flip side, the
She could have easily insulted for fear of reprisal from vaccine could serve as a deterrent
Edwards and mocked what hap- Every year, 250,000 women unsupportive parents. of sex; the vaccine is a constant
pened to Isaiah Washington in d i e fr o m c e r vi c a l c a n ce r It is absurd to oppose reminder that sexual behavior can
two separate jokes. She chose to worldwide. In the last decade, mandatory HPV vaccination on lead to cancer. I hope people can
say something controversial, and scientists have discovered that the grounds that the vaccine throw away their sensitivity to the
to see how many people would more than 70 percent of cervical would promote promiscuity. If sexual aspects of the vaccine.
become infuriated over a joke cancers are caused by HPV, the there were a better reason, such This vaccine is like any other
about how society overreacts to human papillomavirus. In 2006, as possible damage to the body, it vaccine a person gets as a young
controversial statements. ◙ the FDA approved a vaccine that would be reasonable to oppose child.
would prevent cervical cancer by mandatory vaccination. Millions If parents choose to believe
ONLINE PERILS stopping HPV. Studies have shown of dollars were invested to invent that the HPV vaccine promotes
continued from page 6 that the vaccine was over 95 the vaccine. It is a disgrace to sexual promiscuity, consider this:
percent effective in preventing label the lifeblood of scientists as would you rather your daughter
III” illustrated tactics that online cervical cancer. The onl y
predators use to lure susceptible something promoting die from cervical cancer, or have
requirement of the vaccine is that it promiscuous behavior, when their sex? ◙
teenagers. Initially, the predator must be administered before any
introduces him/herself as a aim was to save lives. It is an
sexual activity to prevent previous insult to the victims of cervical

Source: Corbis
prospective friend that would do transmission of the virus.
nothing to harm them and cancer when parents refused the
With the advent of the HPV potentially life-saving vaccine
everything to benefit them. As the vaccine, states have considered
friendship progresses, he or she because it might promote
making the HPV vaccine a part of promiscuity.
will slowly incorporate topics the regular vaccination schedule
about sex into conversations. This I ask everyone who opposes
for young girls. The first state to ma n d a t o r y va c c i n a t i o n t o
is a major red flag in identifying make HPV vaccination
predators, but teenagers’ interest reconsider their unfair assessment
mandatory was Texas. However, of the vaccine. First of all, the
in such matters will often despite the benefits of the
overcome their instincts. Soon, vaccine only prevents one
vaccine, some parents are disease, cervical cancer. If the
the predator will suggest a secret opposed to mandatory HPV
meeting for the two to meet, teen was to have sex, there are
vaccination. In traditional areas, many other risks and STDs, such
which later may culminate in such as the Bible Belt in the
sexual activities. NBC as syphilis, gonorrhea, and
South, the vaccine is opposed herpes, to consider. The idea that
correspondent Chris Hansen primarily because parents are
caught fifty men trying to engage the HPV encourages sexual Gardasil, the world’s first cervical
afraid that the new vaccine will behavior is as crazy as the idea
minors in sexual activity. cancer vaccine, is on display during its
make adolescents more bold and that a tetanus vaccine would launch in Sydney. It aims to halt the
Surprisingly, all fifty men more likely to have sex. As a
pleaded not guilty in court. ◙ encourage people to step on more spread of HPV, which causes cervical
result, legislators are reluctant to cancer.

Letter to the Counselor Room Ext. Seniors Juniors Sophomores Freshmen

Editor
26 Homerooms — 13 Counselors
BIEGELSON Jay 236R 2385 7B 7J 7JA 5A 5G 3A 3B 3JA 1A 1B
Do the math!

Why isn’t the college office writ- FERRER Diana 236L 2383 7T 7V 5T 5V 5W 3T 3U 1T 1U
ing SSR's?
Who knows better than the college
office what the colleges are look- GUTHRIE Undine 236A 2362 7C 7D 5C 5D 5E 3C 3D 3E 1C 1D
ing for in an SSR?

The members of the guidance de- MC CRAY Jan 236C 2363 7F 7H 7S 5JA 5JB 3F 3G 3H 1F 1G 1H
partment must serve as guidance
counselors and grade advisors, in
addition to writing all SSRs. Their MUI John 236F 2366 7K 7L 7R 5J 5K 5L 3J 3K 1J 1K
caseload assignment is as follows:
The college office has gone from 2
positions to 3 full-time counselors, NEGRIN Meredith 2360 2364 7E 7M 7N 5M 5N 3M 3N 3O 1M 1N 1O
who have the following caseload
to advise on their college choices.
They also have two full-time sec-
retaries and a school aide to assist RAJWANT Shaklra 2368 2361 5B 5F 3L 3W 3Z 1E 1W
them with the paper work. Their
caseload assignment is as follows:
SCHINDLER Mazra 236G 2367 7P 7Q 7W 5P 5D 3P 3O 1P 1O
PAT CLEARY : 5A-5E
GREGG W ALKES: 5F-5Q
KATE OLIVER: 5R-5ZD VIBOCH Marev 236N 2386 7A 7G 7Z 5H 5R 5S 3R 1L 1R
How can we better serve our stu-
dents?
Regards, WANG Jeremy 2360 2387 7X 7Y 5X 5Y 5Z 3X 3Y 1X 1Y 1Z
Concerned for Stuyvesant Students
8 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 10 SCIENCE

SCIENCE
“Missing Is There Anybody Out There?
Chunk” of by John Yoon, staff writer numbing and difficult, while the SETI has currently only ob-

Earth Poses
chances of a reward are very served 750 solar systems, but
Of all the overly-debated and slim. “It’s like pulling the lever within the next 25 years, technol-
controversial subject matters in the on a slot,” states senior ogy is expected to improve enough
Threat to
field of science, few come close to astronomer Seth Shostak. “The that a few million more systems
the sheer passion generated by the next quarter might be it.” will be viewable. Shostak uses
possibility of extraterrestrial
Tectonic
So while many people find this fact to wager a Starbucks cof-
beings. The science fiction novels the search for life on other worlds fee with his interrogators that “the
inspired by these arguments are to be futile and hopeless, Shostak question of whether mankind is
Theory
limitless, ranging remains optimistic
from Orson Scott about the data that
Card’s Ender’s
“The question of EXTRATERRESTRIALS
whether mankind is SETI has collected, continues on page 9
Game to H. G. and the data it will
Source: zeenews.com

Wells War of the alone in the universe collect in the future.

Source: amazon.com
Worlds. To
many people, will be settled by the For example, it has
been proven that
however, the year 2025.” harsh conditions
idea of an alien can still propagate
civilization re- life, with the prime example
mains in the world of fiction, and being Earth, which has many
the few people who cling to their places with extreme weather and
faith are scoffed at, but there might temperatures that still give birth
A team of British scientists set out to
be more reason to “believe” than to organisms. In addition,
study a newly discovered “missing
chunk” in the Mid-Atlantic Ridge. previously supposed. astronomers now believe that
Many respected astronomers anywhere from 5 percent to 90
and physicists solemnly occupy percent of all stars are orbited by
by Omar Ahmad, staff writer
their time with the pursuit of planets; that is equal to 10 million
From elementary school to our extraterrestrial creatures. One other solar systems. SETI
current high school careers, we major organization is SETI, or theorizes that of these billions
have been taught that the Earth’s Search for E xtraterr estria l upon billions of planets, there H.G. Well’s War of the Worlds speaks
continents are in constant motion, Intelligence. The experiments exists at least one alien species. of the possibility of the existence of
in a process known as plate tecton- that they conduct are mind- extraterrestrial beings.
ics. This process involves the shift-
ing of “plates” that are beneath the
Earth’s crust, but above the Earth’s
mantle. These plates are said to be
Obesity Count Triples Among U.S.
in motion for certain amounts of
time, until they collide with other
plates. These plates should block
Teens, Raises Many Questions
our view of the mantle that is hid- left with many psychological age. In a study of 354 girls at the
Source: Yahoo News

den beneath. But is that really so? problems once the y reach University of Mott Children’s
A team of twenty British sci- adulthood. Obesity is becoming an Hospital in Michigan, those who
entists set sail to study a newly epidemic among the young and not were fatter at the age of 3 and
discovered phenomenon along the enough is being done to protect continued to gain weight for the
Mid-Atlantic Ridge: a gaping hole, them. next 3 years had reached puberty
approximately 2.25 miles deep, The number of teens that get by the age of 9. The trend is
that unveils the previously hidden a surgery believed to
mantle of the Earth. The problem t r e a t me n t for “Obesity is becoming contribute to the
is that a tectonic plate should be obesity is early maturation
visible at the site, but, currently, skyrocketing.
an epidemic among of girls in the
only the molten material of the Luckily, teens the young and not United States.
mantle resides there. Especially at Childhood obesity may cause earlier have been found enough is being done Early puberty has
this area, the Mid-Atlantic Ridge, puberty in some girls. to recover faster been connected
notorious for earthquakes and from the surgery
to protect them..” with negati ve
other happenings of the sort, a by Garry Chien, staff writer
than adults. In o u t c o m e s ,
plate should exist. Often, upon hearing of the 2003, teens recovered in an including psychiatric disorders,
One reason that people do not dangers of obesity, one average of 3.2 days as opposed to deficits in ps ychosocial
believe that it is indeed the mantle immediately thinks of heart 3.5 days for adults. However, functioning, earlier use of
at the entrance to the hole along disease, high blood pressure, they have been found to suffer alcohol, earlier sexual
the Ridge is that the Earth’s crust diabetes and cancer. However, more psychological problems intercourse, and increased rates of
is supposedly much thicker than a obesity may also trigger early than adults such as a crash in obesity and cancer.
mere 2.25 miles. If it is true that puberty, which is extremely weight, or identity issues. The These are not the only
the mantle is present only 2 miles unhealthy. Many teens are now at teens are put in situations they problems of the new obesity
under the surface, then there must risk as the occurrence rate of never believed they would be in. epidemic. A large problem is that
already be a large portion of the obesity continues to climb. For As if cancer or heart disease an obese person usually continues
crust missing. The missing instance, the rate of obesity is not bad enough, scientists have to become even more overweight.
surgery for teens has tripled in the discovered that the obese young
last few years, and while teen are also more likely to reach
MISSING CHUNK OBESITY
patients recover quickly, they are puberty before others of the same
continues on page 9 continues on page 9
 SCIENCE March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 9
EXTRATERRESTRIALS
Our Thoughts: Once Private, Now Exposed continued from page 8

to the Public alone in the universe will be settled

by the year 2025.”
by SangHee Chung, columnist “The fact that we can volunteers were only focused on So i f, h ypot het ica ll y
determine what intention a person the two possibilities, rather than speaking, we finally made contact
Scientists in Germany, is holding in their mind pushes the infinite choices people may with an alien, just what should be
Britain, and Japan have found a the level of our understanding of have in other situations. expected? The sci-fi traditional
way to “read minds” using subjective thought to a whole Once the technology becomes image of an insect-like creature
functional magnetic resonance new level,” said Dr. Paul Wolpe, more developed, it can have a wide (the “Buggers” from Ender’s
imaging (fMRI) and computer a psychiatry professor at the range of uses, from criminal inter- Game) or an anthropomorphic
programs. This may seem straight University of Pennsylvania. rogations to airline security creature (such as the Alien or
out of a science-fiction novel, but Led by Dr. John-Dylan checks. It may even be used one Predator) is thought to be highly
it’s reality. Ha ynes, the day for people who are paralyzed. unlikely, and these images tell us
Volunteers research team By understanding intentions, the more about the human psyche
were slid into an than anything else.
MRI machine and
“These technologies, tried to identify technology could carry out instruc-
Many other theories of just what
which part of the tions such as changing television
asked to perform for the first time, give b r a i n stored channels or using the Internet. the first alien-human encounter
simple tasks, such us a real possibility intentions, and There are, however, ethical will be like are suggested. As
as adding and sub- eventually came issues involving potential abuse by some scientists frankly state, “The
tracting or decid- of going straight to universe is three times as old as the
across the authorities, marketers, or employ-
ing on buttons to the source to see prefrontal cortex ees. earth, so there’s opportunity for
push. The scien- what somebody is region. “These technologies, for the civilizations that are billions of
tists were able to “If you knew first time, give us a real years ahead of us.” Their superior-
accurately deter- thinking or feeling.” ity to the human race could be so
which thought possibility of going straight to the
mine their inten- Dr. Hank Greenly signatures to look source to see what somebody is huge that to humans, any form of
tions 70 percent of Stanford University for, you could thinking or feeling, without them technology or communications
the time. Although theoretically having any ability to stop us,” would be considered magic. But
scientists have predict in more said Dr. Hank Greenly from once again, this edges on the side
already known about detecting detail what people were going to Stanford Univer sit y. “T he of fiction, so while the possibility
physical motions before they ap- do in the future,” said Haynes. concept of keeping your thoughts of extraterrestrial life is out there,
pear, this is the first time they have Currently, however, the private could be profoundly one shouldn’t hope too much for a
identified decisions in more com- technology cannot be used to spy altered in the future.” What a visit from a Wookie any time
plex cases. on others. Furthermore, the 21 change that would be! ◙ soon.◙

MISSING CHUNK Scientists are hoping to discover OBESITY who have not reached adulthood
continued from page 1 whether the crust was sliced off by continued from page 1 and even youngsters who have
enormous geological faults, or if it yet to reach their teenage years
“chunk” of Earth would have to be never even developed in the first A suppressor called SOCS-3 is experience ps ychol ogic a l
a vast 4-11 miles thick. place. Yet another explanation believed to be associated with the damage. The problems are likely
“It’s a real challenge to our may also be relevant, however. fat hormone leptin, which tells to affect them for the rest of their
established understanding of what The scientists could have drilled the body if it is hungry. It is lives. To make matters worse, as
the Earth’s surface looks like into a magma chamber along the believed that obesity occurs due studies on leptin responses
underneath the waves,” said Mid-Atlantic Ridge. The hole in to a lack of leptin or a weakened indicate, some people have no
Bramley Murton, a senior research the Earth’s crust could just be an response to it As obesity rates control over obesity. In time,
scientist at Southampton’s entryway to a small deposit of rise, even the generations that are however, scientists will surely
National Oceanography Centre. magma above the Earth’s crust. ◙ yet to come are suffering. Teens develop a cure for obesity. ◙

BUSNIESS
It’s Killing Cats and Dogs “Godless” Dollars Hit the Market
by Paul Rozenburg, staff writer a coin, but the designers of the
by Hanford Chiu business editor Emporia, Kan. Menu Food, which George Washington dollar parted
supplies 1 percent of America’s An unknown number of newly with this tradition. Because of
Menu Foods, a pet food pet food products, has stopped minted George Washington dollar
manufacturer based in Ontario, this, a new and more complex
coins were struck without the manufacturing system had to be
Canada, has recalled over 60 PETS phrases “In God We Trust” and “E
million cans of wet dog and cat used, prompting the errors.
continues on page 2 Pluribus Unum” inscribed on their The George Washington
food products over the past few edges. The coins, part of the new
weeks. The voluntary recall, dollar was put into circulation
Presidential Dollar Program, were
Source: Yahoo News

which covers over 90 brands of partly as a result of the failure of

put into circulation on February the Sacagawea Golden Dollar,
dog and cat food in the United 15.
States, including Iams, PetCare first released in 2000. The Mint
It is believed that around responded to public demands for
and Science Diet, was due to a 50,000 coins containing the error
contamination that is believed to a new dollar coin, and was
were released, out of a total of hoping for success similar to that
have been caused by a supply of 300 million produced. All of the
wheat gluten (which is used to of the State Quarter Program.
coins without the inscriptions The Presidential Dollar Program
thicken the gravy used in wet food came from the Philadelphia
products, which means the dry will run until all presidents who
A toxin normally used in rat poison branch of the United States mint.
food products are not affected) to The two missing phrases are
has recently been found in pet food, DOLLAR
Menu Food’s main food plant in usually struck on the front face of
which has killed a number of pets. continues on page 10
10 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 BUSINESS
PETS
Google Search Engine… Google
died recently after eating food
continued from page 1 from the company, which may
Mail… and Now Google television? shipments from the suspected
lead to a class action lawsuit.
This pet food scare is reminiscent
supplier, the identity of which has of recent recalls of human foods,
by Si Hong Huang, staff writer tisers by Google and delivered to such as the E. Coli infected spin-
not been disclosed by the FDA.
the cable company so they appear After several complaints of ach in 2006. However, a contami-
Google Inc., the Mountain in the normal breaks in program-
View, Calif. Company, has com- pet deaths related to kidney nation of pet food products is
ming as other ads do. Examples as failure in mid-February, Menu more serious than one of human
menced pursuing its next big ambi- to what consumers might see in-
tion: controlling the television ads Food informed the FDA, which food products, since pets have a
clude: an area with a lot of chil- promptly began an investigation more limited variety of edible
that viewers see and adjusting dren might be more likely to see
them to fit viewer interests. It into the matter. Then, in a foods. Thus, if one of the main
commercials for minivans than for quarterly taste test administered ingredients in pet food products
plans on taking its extremely prof- sports cars, or a consumer who
itable contextual online advertising to about 50 cats and dogs on becomes contaminated, then it
owns a dog might see constant dog February 27, nine cats died due to could end up affecting many pets
as the model for its test run for food ads.
television commercials to cable the tests in early March (no dogs since they are all likely to con-
Although Google is still in died, but it is not clear if any of sume it. However, in this case, it
subscribers in Concord, Calif. the early stages of bringing new
Google CEO Eric Schmidt told those who survived suffered is due only to a single supplier
ways of advertising to television, it kidney damage). and distributor of food, unlike a
analysts in January that the com- comes to show that the way
pany is experimenting with televi- The delay between the first more widespread contamination
advertisements are brought to complaints and deaths has of food, such as the bird flu or
sion advertising. He said the com- consumers could be changed
pany intends to use its technology prompted a lawsuit from a mad cow disease. ◙
forever. If Google succeeds in its woman in Chicago, whose 9-
to better target television commer- plans, other media companies
cials to viewers. year-old orange tabby became If your pet has symptoms of kidney
might actually lose their positions sick about a week before the failure such as a loss of appetite,
According to The Wall Street in the advertisement market due to
Journal, Google since last year has recall after eating a single serving lethargy, vomiting, increased
Google’s popularity, stock price, of Special Kitty Select Cuts and urination and thirst, contact a
been steering television commer- and financial holdings. Google’s
cials to subscribers of cable pro- was diagnosed with kidney veterinarian immediately. For
foothold into television failure. The cat was euthanized more details on the recall, check
vider Astound Broadband, a unit of commercials comes at a time when
WaveDivision Holdings LLC. on March 17. Since then, there http://www.menufoods.com/recall/
the cable industry itself is turning have been numerous other or http://www.fda.gov for a list of
When Astound’s customers watch to ads as a hopeful source of
television, some commercial spots complaints from consumers recalled products.
they see have been sold to adver- revenue. ◙ whose pets have mysteriously

McDonald’s Trying to Change its McImage

by Hanford Chiu business editor
Source: YahooNews

McDonald’s, especially on its shop Nevertheless, McDonald’s is

floor level, have long been pushi ng for wa rd wi th it s
McDonald’s, the fast food associated with high school campai gn to attract more
chain known for its fatty foods and dropouts and disadvantaged customers and better employees.
low-prospect employment, has minorities. Some parents threaten Last year, McDonald’s took
been undergoing a publicity their kids with a future of working advantage of the term “McJob”
campaign to completely turn at McDonald’s in order to by using it in part of a slogan for
around its image. Most recently, encourage them to study. attracting employees.
McDonald’s is trying to get the Now, in a drive for publicity “McProspects — over half of our
Oxford English Dictionary to and more talented employees, executive team started in our
change its definition of “McJob”, McDonald’s is working to change restaurants. Not bad for a
which is currently defined as “an this negative misconception about McJob.”
unstimulating, low-paid job with its employment opportunities. McDonald’s has always had a
McDonald’s will try to define few prospects, especially one “It’s the complete opposite to somewhat negative image here in
“McJob” entries in British dictionar- created by the expansion of the that,” said the United States.
ies, believing it to be incorrect. service sector.” Here in the United Amanda Pierce, Linked with the
States, people working at a 15-year “McDonald’s is rampant obesity
DOLLAR promised to alter the McDonald’s working to change that many parents
continued from page 9 manufacturing process in order to employee and this negative miscon- and the government
add the lettering on the edges for s p o ke s p e r s o n , is trying to fight,
on OED’s ception about its em- McDonald’s has
have been deceased for more than all the coins, but another problem
soon surfaced. definition. “It’s ployment opportuni- been the target of
two years have their likeness
A couple in Colorado found a stimulating, ties.” multiple lawsuits
imprinted on a coin.
dollar coin without the face of rewarding and claiming that its
The entire program has come
George Washington on it: the offers a wide food has made
under speculation from those who
coin was blank on both the heads range of opportunities. All the people obese. Furthermore,
remember the Sacagawea Dollar.
and tails side. Although this is an ski l l s I ha ve l earn e d a t stories have come up now and
When a coin of a large
isolated incident so far, it was McDonald’s will last me a then over the last decade of
denomination is produced, critics
confirmed by Ron Guth, a lifetime.” Meanwhile, random things being found in
will naturally reply that bills are
professional coin authenticator in McDonald’s is sending a petition people’s orders, such as syringes
easier and more efficient to use.
California. (signed, of course, by or fried chicken heads, which has
Nevertheless, if the coin does not
The golden dollar will proba- McDonald’s employees) to OED further marred the image of its
catch on with consumers, it will
bly never be as widespread and in order to get the term’s food an d wo r ker q uali t y.
still have a chance for success
successful as the state quarters, but definition changed. Responding However, McDonald’s has been
with coin collectors.
the series will still have a long run. to McDonald’s efforts, an Oxford responding responsibly by taking
When the “godless” coins
No one will ever opt to carry University Press spokeswoman actions such as making the food’s
were originally discovered, they
twenty coins over one bill, but said, “We monitor changes in the nutrition facts available and
fetched as much as $600 dollars
collectors will have the power to language and reflect these in our agreeing to comply with Mayor
online, but their price sank to $50
make this collection a popular one. definitions according to the Bloomberg’s trans-fat ban here in
after it was realized how common
evidence we find.” New York City. ◙
the mistake was. The U.S. mint ◙
 A&E March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 11

ARTS&ENTERTAINMENT
Wickedly Uplifting Final Fantasy III Review
by Si Hong Huang, staff writer

Source: amazon.com
solid, the thing that I liked best of the earliest games in the Final
was the music. The music and Fantasy series. Like most RPGs,
From the opening scene of the lyrics are by Stephen Schwartz, there is not much dialogue except
Broadway hit “Wicked,” I felt my- who’s won Oscars for his work before boss fights and in special
self leaving my seat and entering on “Pocahontas” and “The Prince sequences, but the characters are a
Oz, a place from my childhood of Egypt.” The cast varies but bit better-developed than in the
that was green and familiar. But it Elphaba is currently portrayed by 1990 game. The story itself is typi-
wasn’t familiar for long. “Wicked” Julia Murney, and Glinda is cal — four teenage warriors are
backtracks in order to tell the story played by Kendra Kassebaum. chosen by a magic crystal to go out
of Elphaba (the Wicked Witch of Both do a spectacular job in terms and save the world, for reasons not
the West) from the beginning, that of acting and singing, especially apparent until later in the game,
is, conception. “Are people born Murney, whose fiery, sarcastic, when more backstory is revealed.
wicked or is wickedness thrust witty depiction of Elphaba leaves What really makes this game shine
upon them?” asks Glinda the Good nothing to be desired. is the graphics, which, although
Witch, and this musical definitely The Final Fantasy III is now available
The minor discrepancies that for the Nintendo DS. lackluster by the PSP’s standards,
takes the latter view. Chronicling do exist between “Wicked” and are a great achievement for the DS.
their time at school together and “The Wizard of Oz” make the The world itself is gigantic, and
what puts Elphaba on the path to by Jonathan Xikis, staff writer
storyline hard to place inside every enemy is lovingly rendered
wickedness, “Wicked” is based on Baum’s sequels but anyone who’s in 3D. The main characters them-
In 1990, Final Fantasy III was
the best-selling Gregory Maguire not an avid fan of the thirteen selves change in appearance when
released in Japan for the Nintendo
book of the same name. books probably won’t even care. they take on new jobs, letting them
Family Computer, better known as
The musical is strangely In fact, by the final scene, I had use special abilities. For example,
the “Famicom.” The only problem:
consistent with the plot of the become acquainted with two the Knight can defend fellow fight-
it never came to America. Fast-
classic book (“The Wizard of Oz” different versions of Oz and I ers, while the Thief is fast and can
forward 15 years, to 2005. A Final
by L. Frank Baum) while having definitely liked this one better. open locked doors. Each character
Fantasy III remake was
a completely different tone, “Wicked” transforms Baum’s has a unique style, and can show
announced, not for the Playstation
outlook and cast, mostly because endearing children’s book into a facial expressions during
2, but, in a surprise move, for the
there’s no Dorothy. That’s the story engaging for everyone, cutscenes. Attack animations range
Nintendo DS. Granted, the DS is
only main character missing, while Schwartz’s brilliant work from simple to downright immense
not known for its amazing
however, as the Scarecrow, the will leave you bursting with glee. later in the game, especially when
graphics, but FFIII lives up to its
Lion, the Tin Man and the Wizard Good tickets are hard to using magic. The view can even be
expectations, delivering an
all make an appearance. The come by and most evening zoomed in to find hidden secrets,
amazing 3D world to explore and
second half of “Wicked” seems performances still play to a such as switches or items.
addictive, though a tad repetitive,
more to set the scene for packed theatre. Buying tickets at This is not to say that there are no
gameplay.
everything that happens in least a month in advance is downsides to FFIII, however, for
Final Fantasy III is not in any
Baum’s book, with such style and practically the only option. there are quite a few. A “feature”
way quirky, and doesn’t stray far
flair that it outshines the 1900 “Wicked” is playing at the of the game which annoys many is
from the classic RPG formula. In
work. Gershwin Theatre and tickets are fact, this is the reason people
While the story is strong and available at the theatre and online FINAL FANTASY
would want to buy it: to get a taste
the character development is at ticketmaster.com. ◙ continues on page 12
of how the whole thing began, one

“It Turns Out Persian Corpses are Slippery…”

by Rpbert Colbourn, staff writer
Source: Yahoo Movies

ning the famous battle of Ther- opinion), perfect clarity, and every
mopylae. character on screen is always do-
After graphic novelist Frank It is expected that since this ing something incredible. No one
Miller’s first commercial success, film is based on a graphic novel, it stands around and waiting for a
“Sin City,” expectations were high is not going to be historically accu- turn; everyone is involved.
for his next motion picture adapta- rate, easily seen when certain crea- There is very little that one
tion. Luckily, “300” met them all. tures from Xerxes’ armies come could nitpick in this film. One of
“300” begins with a short life forth. Yet importance should not its few downfalls is the lack of a
story of King Leonidas (Gerard be placed in this area. What should conclusion to the great side story
Butler), ruler of be valued here is of the movie. Queen Gorgo (Lena
Sparta. He is raised “What should be val- the stunning im- Headey) is the strong-willed wife
as a true Spartan
warrior, taught never
ued here is the stun- agery. “300” was
done all in a stu-
of Leonidas. While the battle is
occurring, she has to deal with
to show fear or pain, ning imagery. The dio, using mostly the Hellenistic, patriarchal
never to retreat or fight is beautifully blue screen and politics in Sparta. The story is
surrender. He is ap- green screen never really concluded, and
proached by a Per- choreographed.” effects, allowing therefore fells like just filler in
sian messenger who for breathtaking between the battle scenes. There
informs him of a plan to enslave backgrounds and amazing visual is a good deal of character
Sparta. Leonidas does not take the effects. It also made the actual development going on there, but I
threat seriously, and, without the battle something to behold. The believe one more concluding
help of the Spartan army, he and fight is beautifully choreographed. scene would have done the story
300 of his best men ride off to de- There is no fast-paced shaking of more justice. Yet, this little
fend Sparta and to face the largest the camera (a downfall of Star problem aside, “300” can only be
army ever assembled, thus begin- Wars: Episode III’s battles, in my described as an epic movie that is
the must-see of 2007. ◙
 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 A&E

FINAL FANTASY start again from the beginning. and does not feature co-op or mul- onslaught of monsters, have the
continued from page 11 This also necessitates heavy train- tiplayer. To make matters worse, patience to reach level 99, relish
ing, or “grinding,” which is made the keypad layout could be much defeating the unbeatable final boss,
the inability to save except on the more uninteresting because of the more convenient. Sending mes- and have the guts to try it again if
world map. There is a “quicksave” slow battle system — there is no sages is actually required to obtain they fail. Casual gamers beware —
option, but the saved game is auto- way to skip animations, and the the game’s strongest class and this game is probably not for you.
matically deleted when you return to menus load slowly. Another gripe weapon, an impossibility to those With that said, FFIII, despite its
your game. In effect, this means that is the undeveloped Wi-Fi mode, with no wireless Internet access. flaws, should be a part of the col-
if you spend three hours trudging known as “Mognet,” which only Final Fantasy III is a game lection of any self-respecting
through a huge dungeon and are allows you to send simple mes- made for hardcore RPG fans, ones gamer. ◙
vanquished by the boss, you must sages to others over the Internet, who enjoy the pain of braving an

Movie Watch: A New Batch of Movies To Look Forward To

by Amy Qui, staff writer TMNT (March 23rd) human and half-wolf.

Source: Yahoo Movies

The teenage mutant ninja turtles Shooter (March 23rd)
Now that spring has come along, are back to star in this 3D movie. Mark Wahlberg and Danny Glover
bright ,this means warm weather Strange things have been star in this thriller about an ex-
flowers and yes, new movies! happening in New York City and Marine sniper who grudgingly
Here’s what’s coming to a theater only one man is to blame: Max returns to the military after being
.near you Winters, who’s creating an army persuaded to head off a president
of ancient monsters to take over assassination. After he gets set up
Blades of Glory (March 30th) the world. Looks like they’ll have and framed, he is determined to
After two skaters get into a fight to save the day super ninja style. find out who was really behind the
at the World Championships, The Hills Have Eyes 2 (March murder. ◙
they’re both barred from compet- 23rd)
ing ever again. Played by Will In this sequel to the horror film apparent later on that the objects
Ferrell and Jon Heder, the skaters “The Hills Have Eyes,” a group were sent for a different mission,
find a loophole that will allow of National Guard soldiers which the children become
them to compete. The problem?

Source: Yahoo Movies

embark on a search and rescue entangled in.
It’s pairs’ figure skating. mission in the hills. Though they Skin Walkers (March 30th)
are responding to a distress Werewolves are more than just
signal, they also land themselves bloodsucking creatures in Skin
Source: Yahoo Movies

into the evils that lie within. Walkers, where two sects of
Source: Yahoo Movies

The Last Mimzy (March 23rd) wolves fight for control. Some of
Toys become truly educational them are looking to end the curse
when two children find a on their kind, while the others
mysterious box containing want things to stay the way they
strange objects. As they play with are. In the end, the only one with
them, their intelligence level the real power to change their
grows drastically. It becomes destiny is Timothy, who is half-
 SING! March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 13

SING! FEATURE

SING! REVIEW PHOTO CREDITS:

continued from page 1 Dennis Ng, Derek Weng
to Step, Girls Hip Hop, and Rave.
The production even included
pictures from a projector shown
on the left wall, though the peo-
ple sitting in the mezzanine could FRIDAY SATURDAY TOTAL
not see them. Overall, it could be
seen that all grades had given
tremendous amounts of effort into
SOPH-FROSH 348 381 729
one of the largest productions. At
the end of the night, however, it JUNIOR 501 363 864
was unanimous from the screams
and shouts that Junior SING had SENIOR 381 491 872
won. ◙
 14 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 PUZZLES&LITERARY

PUZZLES&LITERARY
In The Mind The Circus
by Hui Ting, staff writer by Stephanie Tam, staff writer

In the mind of a bumblebee, People soaring in the air

Buzzing across the field Elephants roaming here and there
Searching for a delightful treat, Among them an audience cheering so loud
Applause spreading through the crowd
It dashes about looking for The Circus! The Circus!
The perfect meal that The Circus is in town!
Derives from the core Each and every one of you, gather around!
Monkeys and tigers doing tricks on the floor
This event is never a bore!
Of a savory honeysuckle Cotton candy and peanuts
Standing alone in the field and Distributed to and eaten by all
Apart from the muddle. Then there’s hotdogs and popcorn
Come one, come all!
Bumblebee flee in the air,
Through the autumn
Breeze, without a care

Or a worry in the world,

For it spots a flower that
Seemed impearled

With a sweetness beyond

Compare. Bumblebee swoops
In and suckles on the abscond

Honeysuckle that is truly beyond compare.

IN MEMORY OF
GABRIEL BLITZ AND EUGENE MARSHALIK
It is with deep sadness that The Stuyvesant Standard marks the death of Gabriel and I went to the same middle school, Manhattan East (M.E.).
Gabriel Blitz, a member of the Stuyvesant High School Class of 2008 and Although he was two years older than I, I remember seeing him when he
Eugene Marshalik, a member of the Class of 2005. Marshalik was a student came back to visit M.E. in his freshman and sophomore years. I am a very
at New York University and an auxiliary police officer. He was killed in a garrulous person, so, naturally, I was inclined to ask him what high school
shooting in Greenwich Village while on patrol. he now attended and other such things. I think that was when I first decided
to call him the “Green Guy” and that name stuck with him. He told me
Source: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2007/03/16/2007-03-

about his love of reptiles and herpetology and that explained the green
jacket that I will always remember him by. He was one of the nicest, most
sincere people. Then, when I came to Stuyvesant, I frequently saw him in
the hallways and always talked to him in between classes. It led to some
random (but meaningful) conversations about everything and nothing. It
was great. The last time I talked to him was on the platform of the 1 and 2
trains. We talked about how we have the same initials and the cool things
one can find on the Staten Island Ferry. I even remember his way of
waving “hello” which, for lack of better words, is best described as wiping
a window (without moving the wrist). He was also one of the very few
people at Stuy who reside in the Bronx and I always saw him as my fellow
Bronx-ite. Now every time I see someone with a green jacket in the
hallway, I think that maybe it’s Gabriel and that all of this has been just a
Source: Koester

terrible misunderstanding. I start walking faster, to catch up to that

mysterious person who could put an end to this nightmare, and I am only
saddened to see that it’s not him. It’s not Gabriel.
I am very happy to have known him. I only wish that I could have spent
more time with him. I miss you, Green Guy.

Guergana Borissova
 LITERARY&PUZZLES March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 12 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD 15

Video Surveillance by Robert Stevenson

KINCKS
Sudoku Created by Angel Wong continued from page 16
They are a team that goes from hot
to cold not only from game to
game but from quarter to quarter,”
4 5 remain coach and general manager
of the Knicks.
he wrote in a recent article.
Knicks players, however, have
Although many claim that Do- been very optimistic about their
8 4 2 lan was rushed into this action,
there is no doubt that Thomas did
future. In a blog, Nate Robinson,
Knicks guard and 2006 Slam Dunk
in fact improve the Knicks. For the Champion, showed his approval of
5 6 1 3 most part, Thomas has motivated
the Knicks players and has taught
the Knicks’ improvement. “I know
we still have a long way to go, but
them how to effectively play to- I can’t help but feel excited about
gether. Although Eddie Curry, the improvements we’ve made
7 8 4 Knicks center, Stephon Marbury, since last season. We’re the best
point guard, struggled for most of rebounding team in the East and
last season, they have both ex- one of the better scoring teams,
6 celled under Thomas. Curry has too… We can move up in the East,
been named the best center in the and even become a playoff team. I
East by many experts. really believe that,” Robinson said.
1 4 9 Although the Knicks have im- So for all you Knicks fans, do
not lose hope in your team. They
proved compared to last season,
many still think that the Knicks have undoubtedly progressed un-
3 9 2 7 must do more. Steven Jones,
MSNBC news writer, claimed that
der Thomas, but further improve-
ment is still necessary. It is defi-
the Knicks will not make the play- nitely possible for the Knicks to
7 2 5 offs this year because of inconsis-
tency. “Only twice in the first four-
make the first round of the play-
offs, and who knows, maybe even
plus months of the season did the further. ◙
4 6 Knicks win three games in a row.

The Case of the Knife Wielding Riddle

by Lillian Su, staff writer
by Jeffrey Liaw, staff writer
A notorious gangster, Scarface Joe, was found face-down on a barroom
floor by Detective Hobbs. He had a bullet wound in his left ear, where a Charlie was abandoned at a nearly age and had a terrible life. He couldn't
bullet had entered and must have lodged somewhere in his brain, as there stand his adoptive parents and their children One day, he couldn't take it
was no exit wound. The bullet matched the gun of Bernie the Bull, another and just killed his adoptive parents' offspring. Oddly enough, the parents
gangster and Joe's rival. It is widely known that though they hated each still worked hard and made sure he survived. Charlie later left when he was
other, they frequented the same bar. old enough.
Bernie said that he was the only customer when Joe came in and started
yelling at him. "He was like a madman," said Bernie. "He pulled out a knife
and started coming at me. I shot him in self-defense as he charged head-on The police, or social services were not called even though Charlie killed his
at me swinging that knife." Joe's body lying close by still had the knife adoptive siblings. Why?
clutched in his left hand. "He just wouldn't stop coming at me," exclaimed
Bernie. "I had to shoot, I had no choice."
The only witness was the bartender and another shady character, who 1) Nothing to do with being underage
agreed with Bernie's story. 2) His family had a habit of doing it
3) His adoptive parents did not blame him
Detective Hobbs just smiled and said, "you boys will have time to think of 4) He never joined the military
something better than that story on the way to the slammer." 5) He was born in the spring

How did he know?

16 THE STUYVESANT STANDARD March 29, 2007—VOL. 6, No. 10 SPORTS

SPORTS
The Sports Beat: Why You Once Upon a Time in March
Don’t Read Forbes for Sports Madness
by Eric Mayo, sports editor waste the talents of Kevin Garnett by Hesham Saleh, staff writer situations with other players in the
by surrounding him with medioc- locker room, trying to analyze the
The Economist’s next issue is rity like Ricky Davis, and prior to On March 11, after 24 long best and worst possible situations
going to feature the best rappers in that, Wally Szczerbiak. He’s hours of analyzing the NCAA bas- for their teams.On a totally differ-
the world, and rate them on how wasted free agent money on point ketball teams, the selection com- ent note, colleges try to come up
“gangsta” they are. Sports Illus- guard Marko Jaric, who averages 8 mittee invited 65 teams to join the with their own “mathematical for-
trated is going to be doing a fea- points and 3 assists a game for five tournament. From March 11 to mula” to predict their team’s most
ture on the best hair and skin care million dollars, as well as wasting March 15, when the first game likely seed number. After analyz-
products. Don’t forget about The five million on Troy Hudson, a took place, millions of Americans ing the teams that reached the Fi-
Standard’s next issue, a special on bench player. This is the best GM from around the country filled out nal Four since 1999, the experts at
pension funds. in professional sports? The guy brackets. Yes, March Madness has Georgia Tech University created
If you couldn’t tell by now, who is outspent only by the officially started. Everyone knows the Logistic Regression/Markov
the above samples are nonsense. A Knicks? that during this time, 65 NCAA Chain Model, or LRMC. This sys-
magazine about economics has Third on the list is Billy King, teams battle each other and try to tem is based on the number of road
nothing to do with rap. You GM of the Philadelphia 76ers. The reach the Championship. Fans test wins, strength of schedule, and
wouldn’t read Sports Illustrated for 76ers were a near carbon copy of their expertise by filling out, and most importantly, margins of vic-
hygiene tips. If you’re looking for Minnesota, surrounding a talented usually waging money on, brack- tory. “Anything that doesn’t take
pension fund information here, you player (Allen Iver- ets. There are several interesting point differential into account ig-
obviously have the son) with expen- tales that come with March Mad- nores the element of luck,” said
wrong newspaper. “Print media should sive mediocrity. ness, many of which are virtually Joel Sokol, “If I beat you by 20, it
Print media should Though the 76ers unknown. probably wasn’t by chance.”
only write about only write about Fans use many different tech-
something they something they have have traded Iver-
son to the Nuggets niques to predict the winning
This system showed itself to
be extremely accurate. In the 2004
have a clue about. a clue about. That is and have since teams, some of which are truly NCAA tournament, four of the
That is why Forbes improved, it’s absurd. Some people use colors to teams the LRMC ranked top five
should give up on why Forbes should predict the winning teams: the
clear that Iverson’s made it to the Final Four. Out of
its analysis of give up on its analy- prime was wasted team with the “fiercest color” will all ranking systems, the LRMC
sports. sis of sports.” by King’s mis- go the furthest. Others imagine a was the most accurate.
To be fair, management. mascot fight, and pick the team But at the end of the month,
economics and The best general managers of with the “unbeatable mascot.” Still the most important question will
sports are much more closely re- sports are in baseball. Baseball has others choose their teams based on not be about brackets or different
lated than sports and hygiene prod- no salary cap, so a team with little graduation rate. The lower the prediction systems. Who will reach
ucts. However, Forbes Magazine’s payroll, like the Kansas City Roy- graduation rate, the more likely the the Final Four, and who will be
latest dive into the world of sports, als) has to compete with the Yan- team is to win: if they’re not study- proclaimed the Champions of
an article titled “The Best General kees on a yearly basis. General ing, then they must be playing bas-
Managers in Sports,” is wrong ketball. NCAA Basketball? ◙
Managers who spend little and win
beyond any imaginable belief. ought to be rewarded. A perfect NCAA tournament pools can
To rank the general managers, be found nearly everywhere — on
Source: Corbis

example of this is Billy Beane of

Forbes took two things into ac- the Oakland Athletics. The Oak- the Internet, at work, in school, at
count: winning percentage com- land payroll is nothing when com- restaurants, and many other places.
pared to their predecessors and pared to those of the Yankees, Red Believe it or not, they are also
payroll relative to the league me- Sox and Anaheim Angels. Yet no found in MLB locker rooms during
dian when their predecessors were matter what the circumstances, the spring training. MLB players take
around. Winning was factored Athletics compete in the AL West. their brackets very seriously. The
twice, so as to discount teams that That is the sign of a truly good pool is usually created and super-
just slash their payroll consistently, general manager. vised by a veteran. Each player
like the Florida Marlins. You don’t read The Standard puts a certain amount of money
The results? All over the for retirement issues. You don’t into the pool, usually somewhere
place. Leading the list was Kevin read Sports Illustrated for beauty between $20 and $100. After they
McHale, GM of the Minnesota tips. Above all, don’t read Forbes pick their teams, it’s an all-out
Timberwolves. He’s managed to battle. Players discuss their teams’ Emeka Okafor puts a shot against the
for sports. ◙ Duke Blue Devils during the NCAA.

Knicks Fans: Expect the Unexpected

by Hesham Saleh, staff writer Over the last few years, no winning percentage. Thomas, the current Knicks coach,
Knick fan has really expected a lot But this season has been president and general manager, if
As of March 12, the New York from the team. The Knicks have slightly different for the Knicks. he did not see “sufficient pro-
Knicks’ record was 29-34. Al- had five consecutive losing sea- Despite instability and several in- gress.” With still approximately a
though their record is less than sons, making the playoffs only juries, the Knicks have already quarter of the season remaining,
.500, they are a half game ahead of once, in 2004. The last time they won more than 23 games, and are Dolan has already seen that pro-
the New Jersey Nets for the eighth won a playoff series was in 1999, astonishingly in the race for the gress. On March 12, he signed
and final playoff spot in the East- when they reached the NBA Finals two final playoff spots in the East- Thomas to a multiyear extension to
ern Conference. Although this may to the San Antonio Spurs. Last ern Conference.
not seem to be a great accomplish- season, under the “great” Larry At the beginning of this sea-
ment, for the Knicks it is almost a Brown, the Knicks managed to win son, James Dolan, owner of the KINICKS
miracle. only 23 games, for a mere .280 Knicks, threatened to fire Isiah continues on page 15