Parks and Recreation A Day at the Beach Written By Stefan Lopez stefanlopezis@gmail.

com

COLD OPEN LESLIE TALKING HEAD Leslies office. LESLIE Today marks a historic moment for our great city of Pawnee. For the first time in nearly a decade, the Parks Department is organizing a pancake luncheon for both the police and fire departments. I havent been this excited since Amelia Bishop became the first non-Lutheran woman elected to our city council. INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT MAIN OFFICE MORNING D1 Leslie is briefing the office on the days agenda. LESLIE Now as you all know, this is bigger than huge. Were on the verge of breaking a wall of silence that has existed between these two departments for far too long. APRIL Why dont they like each other? LESLIE Groundhogs Day 2002: our beloved Pawnee Pete tried to run back into his hole, signifying six more weeks of winter. Unfortunately, he found an open sewage drain instead and both the police and fire departments rushed in to save him. RON I still maintain that they should have left him there. If thats not a sign for another decade from hell then I dont know what is.

LESLIE At any rate, a physical dispute ensued over who should save Pete. Theres been bad blood between both departments ever since. A beat. APRIL Fascinating. LESLIE How would you like to be the lead social planner April? APRIL Oh thats alright, I, have a phobia of pancakes. JERRY I can help Leslie! Gayle knows a great caterer. LESLIE Thats OK Jerry Ive got this under control. TOM Alright Leslie, Ill be your social coordinator for this shindig. You know Ive got the hookup on party supplies from my nightclub connections. LESLIE Wow Tom thanks for volunteering, I really appreciate the initiative. TOM TALKING HEAD TOM I couldnt care less about this pancake luncheon. But the Tom Haverford touch equals a bomb party, and a bomb party equals bomb

hunnies. Its a good thing that the fire department is gonna be there, cause people are gonna be yelling the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire. END COLD OPEN

ACT I EXT. PARK MIDDAY D1 Leslie is walking with April and Andy down a path. APRIL Why did we have to come out here again? LESLIE Since you two will be working with Tom to make sure this celebration is a smash hit, I figured Id give you guys some inspiration by showing you the site of the 2002 Groundhogs Day debacle and future location of our historic pancake luncheon: Arthur Rollins Park. APRIL But Andy doesnt even work for you. ANDY Leslies gonna let Mouse Rat play a few songs during the luncheon, so I figured Id help you out. April smiles briefly at Andy. LESLIE Here it is guys, the sewage drain that started it all. The drain is a covered manhole. ANDY How did Pawnee Pete even get in there? LESLIE Determination, Andy, good ole Pawneean determination.

APRIL Or the manhole was open. LESLIE Now as luck would have it we have this pavilion not even a hundred yards away that we can use for the pancake luncheon. APRIL So you want to make peace by reminding them of what caused the feud in the first place? LESLIE Oh dont be such a downer April, this is a perfect opportunity for both departments to come together and laugh over how silly this whole rivalry has been. Everythings going to be fine. April rolls eyes at camera. INT. RONS OFFICE MIDDAY D1 Ben is growing frustrated in Rons office. BEN Theres simply no way you guys can afford to host this event. Youve gotta slash spending by forty percent and now youre tryRON I can offset the costs of the pancake luncheon by cutting funding for the senior citizen water aerobics program. BEN If its that easy to cut why havent you already done it? RON

The trail of red tape and broken promises runs wide and deep. BEN But now you expect to just make it happen? RON Precisely. BEN Even so, this just isnt feasible right now. Your department needs to be actively cutting programs, not just treading water. RON Hence my symbolic cutting of the senior citizen water aerobics program. When I am finished here we wont even be moving in water, much less treading. RON TALKING HEAD In the Parks Department office, Ben is still in Rons office. RON I have no interest in reuniting the police and fire departments. As far as Im concerned they are both symptomatic of a government that is far too over-controlling. However, if you think Im going to miss an opportunity for a pancake luncheon on the taxpayers dime, youd have to be as stupid as, well, Ben. BEN Im right here. INT. SNAKEHOLE LOUNGE EVENING D1 Tom is sitting with a table full of beautiful women.

TOM So then I told her, thats not Mahatma Ghandi, its your mother-in-law! Everyone laughs. PRETTY GIRL Youre really funny. TOM And you are smokin girl. Whats your name again? PRETTY GIRL Scarlett. TOM Since when did Scarlett Johansson lose three years and twenty pounds? The girls laugh. Jean-Ralphio enters. JEAN-RALPHIO My, my, my look at all these fly mamacitas. How are we doing tonight? TOM Jean-Ralphio! Glad you could finally make it! Youll have to excuse me ladies, me and my associate have some business to attend to. Tom leaves the table and pulls Jean-Ralphio aside. JEAN-RALPHIO Tommy baby, why arent we over by the action? I just got here. TOM

No worries, well have plenty of time to lay down our mack game once we throw the bombest party south central Indiana has ever seen. JEAN-RALPHIO (slaps hands with Tom) My man. TOM Did you get me the hook-up like I asked? JEAN-RALPHIO Oh you know it, my boy said hed loan us everything we need for free. All we gotta do is let him advertise. Tom looks excitedly at the camera. INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT MAIN OFFICE MORNING D2 B-roll: Andy is at Aprils desk, skating around and being goofy. She seems amused. DONNA (V.O.) Ive known theres been something between those two for awhile. Andy turns into a five year old boy whenever he likes someone. DONNA TALKING HEAD At her desk. DONNA Then again, even when hes not in love Andy still only acts like hes eight. Personally, I couldnt do it. Handling all of this (motions to body) requires a far more sophisticated man. INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT MAIN OFFICE CONTINUOUS MORNING D2

ANDY So what are you thinking we should do for the breakfast luncheon? APRIL I dont know. ANDY I was thinking maybe Mouse Rat could do some pyrotechnics or something. Who could possibly not have a fun time during a killer lights show? APRIL Youre latest album is all about how boring your hometown is. ANDY So? A beat. APRIL Sounds like a great idea. Tom enters the office. TOM Whats up?! How are my two favorite pancake underlings doing? ANDY Tom! Quick, what do you think about pyrotechnics for my bands performance? TOM Uhhhdone. ANDY (slight fist pump) Yes!

TOM Before we do any of that though, I need you two to come with me over to Jean-Ralphios tonight. Im about to scoop up some serious swag for this luncheon tomorrow. APRIL TALKING HEAD In the hall. APRIL Theres no way Ill ever hear swag and luncheon in the same sentence again. INT. CAF NOON D2 Leslie and Ann are having lunch. ANN I dont know, I feel like Chris is a really great guy, I mean hes super positive and all but I cant really tell if hes that into me, you know? LESLIE I know what you mean, Ive really been stressing out about this pancake luncheon. ANN Thats not really what I was talking about. LESLIE I even ran the idea by the police chief, but I dont think he took me seriously. INT. POLICE CHIEFS OFFICE MORNING DAY 2 LESLIE

So I was thinking that this year itd be a great idea for us to combine the police and fire department luncheons. The police chief spits out his coffee in a fit of laughter. POLICE CHIEF Thats a good one Knope. INT. CAF CONTINUOUS NOON D2 LESLIE I havent told anyone yet that I already finalized the plans. ANN Uh-huh. LESLIE But I mean how else are we going to come together as a community if the people sworn to protect us cant get along? ANN Im sure youll figure something out. LESLIE I know, youre right. Guess theyre gonna have to learn to say Knope to negativity. Heh thats a good one Im writing that down. Thanks Ann youre such a great listener. ANN Any time Leslie. INT. CONFERENCE ROOM AFTERNOON D2 Leslie, Ron, Ben, Chris and Tom are all discussing plans. CHRIS So whats the plan here team?

BEN Like I was telling Ron, I dont see how you guys can make this happen. LESLIE Well Ben, after doing some number-crunching I can say with 88.7 percent confidence that we can pull this off while staying within our budget. CHRIS Excellent! BEN You just made that number up. TOM Oh yeah, and Andys been asking for some pyrotechnics for his show. LESLIE Alright, 75 percent confidence. Either way this is gonna be such a great surprise! CHRIS Oh I love surprises! RON Surprise? LESLIE Well, I havent technically told the police and fire departments that theyre going to be eating together yet. RON Please tell me this is just your twisted idea of a joke. LESLIE

Alright, alright dont worry Ill call them both today, if they dont want to come thenRON Leslie do you have any idea what youve just done? These men have been promised a celebratory luncheon with bacon, pancakes, eggs, and bacon. Even if you told them whats happening its too late. Both sides will attend for the bacon and the spite. TOM Oh snap! I can see the headlines now, Groundhogs Day Reunion Devolves into Bacon Fiasco. LESLIE Ron youre way too worried about this, these are all mature, adult men we are dealing with here. Im sure they can put aside their differences for a day. RON Youve been warned. BEN TALKING HEAD Outside the conference room. BEN Ive now officially decided to stay out of this one. Mainly because I really respect Leslies enthusiasm and Id hate to trample on her dream this late in the game. A beat. BEN (CONTD) Also because I want to disassociate myself from the inevitable fallout that will occur from this luncheon.

END OF ACT I

ACT II EXT. SUBURBAN SIDEWALK AFTERNOON D2 Chris and Ann are running together, Ann noticeably more tired than Chris. CHRIS Dont you just love the view right now? Nothing like perfectly trimmed lawns and tidy porches to get the adrenaline pumping. ANN Yeah, its great. CHRIS Better than great. Literally, masterful. ANN I just enjoy running so much more when were doing it together. CHRIS Ah, running with a partner is magnificent, but nothing can beat those quiet solitary mornings when the only sound you hear is your own feet slapping the pavement. Truly magical. ANN Chris, hold on I have to take a break. Ann stops to catch her breath, Chris runs in place in front of her. CHRIS Cmon Ann Perkins! Your muscles are gonna stiffen up in a few seconds if you dont keep moving. ANN

Yeah, its OK I dont think I can go much further anyways. CHRIS Suit yourself! Ive still got another seven miles to go. ANN Thats alright, Im close to home Ill just head back. See you tomorrow for the pancake luncheon? CHRIS Wouldnt miss it for the world. Ciao! ANN Bye. Ann gives a defeated look towards the camera. INT. TOMS CAR EVENING D2 Tom, April and Andy are all riding over to Jean-Ralphios house. ANDY So whats this swag you keep on talking about Tom? TOM All will be revealed soon enough my man. APRIL Be still my beating heart. ANDY This is gonna be so awesome, this is just the kind of gig Mouse Rat needs. Tom pulls into Jean-Ralphios driveway. TOM

I know right? Jean-Ralphio knows a guy whos gonna help us pimp this luncheon out of control. APRIL TALKING HEAD Outside of the car. Theres no way Ill ever hear pimp and luncheon in the same sentence again. EXT. JEAN-RALPHIOS HOUSE CONTINUOUS EVENING D2 Tom rings the doorbell. After a few seconds Jean-Ralphio answers. TOM Whats going on big dog? Sick crib you got here IJEAN-RALPHIO Shhh my parents are sleeping. Meet me out by the garage. Jean-Ralphio shuts the door and Tom, April and Andy move back to the driveway. TOM Man, thats really cool of Jean-Ralphio to let his parents stay with him like that. April looks at the camera unconvinced. The garage door opens. TOM (CONTD) Whoop! There it is. An assortment of Hawaiian accessories and tiki-themed paraphernalia abound. Jean-Ralphio meets them up again. ANDY

Wow, its like a suburban luau in here. Its perfect! JEAN-RAPHIO Yeah man you guys lucked out. I know the owner of The Bulge, and they just had a Hawaiian theme night, so he let me borrow all of this swag for a few days. TOM Jean-Ralphio, youve done it again, all the hunnies are gonna dig this. You sent out the invites right? JEAN-RAPHIO No doubt Tommy, theres gonna be more chicas than we can handle. All you got to do is bring your mack game and make sure to put up these banners promoting The Bulge. Camera pans to several large banners with half-naked men. TOM Done and done. This swag is gonna pimp out the pancake luncheon something ridiculous. APRIL TALKING HEAD April is in the driveway while all the guys marvel at the swag. She stares at the camera for several seconds in dismay. INT. LESLIES OFFICE MORNING D3 Leslie is polishing a photo frame of Hillary Clinton when Ron walks in. LESLIE Well good morning Ron Swanson! Excited for this historic day? Tom, April, Ann and Andy are already setting up at the park.

RON I just came to pay my respects. LESLIE Whys that? RON Chances are high that you will not be able to escape the impending doom that is this pancake luncheon. LESLIE Oh stop it Ron everything will be fine. (raising voice) Dont you think so Jerry? JERRY Its definitely possibleRON Enough Jerry. Listen Leslie its bad enough that this is actually going to happen, dont make it even worse by not being prepared. LESLIE I really dont see what all the fuss is for, this will be a great bonding experience! RON You dont understand. These men are in a rivalry. Theyve been tricked. For gods sake theres bacon on the line. LESLIE Your point? RON Do not underestimate what a group of hungry men will do when they are pushed to their limits.

LESLIE Duly noted. Now if youll excuse me I have to prepare this welcome speech Im giving in a few hours. RON Youre writing your own eulogy. Ron walks out of the office and Leslie begins to write. LESLIE Lets see here, Welcome, protectors of Pawnee, to this unforgettable occasion. EXT. PARK MORNING D3 Tom, April, Ann and Andy are all setting up the decorations, everything is coming together nicely. Ann and Tom are putting up a banner from The Bulge. ANN And then he just ran off. TOM And he didnt even kiss you goodbye? Pshhh I wouldnt take it. ANN I just dont know what it means. He seems so genuine but at the same time I feel like he could just leave in a second and be fine. TOM Girl you are trippin. Look at you, youre scalding hot. He would be an idiot to do something like that. ANN Thanks Tom. TOM

But if he were to kick you to the curb, when youre on the rebound dont forget about the suave persona of Tom Haverford. ANN And theres the Tom I know and am thoroughly creeped out by. TOM Hey I cant help my debonair nature. ANN Your hand is cupping that mans crotch. Tom looks at the banner they putting up and lets go in shock. EXT. PARK MORNING D3 Andy and April are decorating the pavilion. ANDY So now half the band wants to change our name to The Apathetic Sailors. APRIL Thats stupid. ANDY I know right, where did they even come up with that? Now Id be OK with Rodent Blitz or even just keeping it Mouse Rat, but The Apathetic Sailors? Thats try hard. APRIL Totally. ANDY I dont know what were gonna do. If we cant agree on a name then this band is, well, as good as dead. Which was another name we couldnt agree on.

APRIL How about you compromise and become Apathetic Rat? ANDY Nah, still not inspired enough. A beat. APRIL Rodent Sailors? ANDY That isbrilliant! April smiles at Andy. ANDY TALKING HEAD Away from the pavilion a bit, April in the b.g. ANDY Sometimes I feel like she has even more creativity than I do. I mean its crazy but Rodent Sailors is the exact kind of vibe Ive been going for all along, I just couldnt ever put it into words. (looking back at April, then camera) I feel like a five year old kid again. I think I might be in love. INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT MAIN OFFICE LATE MORNING D3 Leslie has finished her speech and comes back out to address Donna and Jerry. LESLIE Alright, its done! My peace-making speech for this historic day is complete.

JERRY Is it time for us to go then? Im starving. LESLIE That it is, Jerry. However, I will not be filling my stomach with food, but instead I shall fill my soul with the taste of forgiveness. DONNA And Im gonna be filling my eyes with the sight of a hundred men in uniform. Mmmm-mmm. Ron comes out wearing a bib and holding a fork. RON Ready your breakfast and eat hearty, for tonight we dine in hell! LESLIE Oh this is gonna be so much fun! INT. DONNAS CAR LATE MORNING D3 Leslie, Ron, Jerry and Donna are riding together to the park. LESLIE Alright so at 12:05 Im going to deliver my speech and then we can start eating. Andys band will come on soon after, then right at 1:00 Ill announce the winner of the raffle and we can spend the rest of the afternoon enjoying the park. Sound good Ron? A beat. LESLIE (CONTD) Ron! RON

Im busy mentally preparing myself for this feast. I can no longer be bothered with petty details. JERRY Sounds good to me Leslie. LESLIE I didnt schedule any time for praise Jerry. DONNA Whats this about a raffle? LESLIE Well, I figured what better way to ease tension between the departments than by having a little friendly competition. (to camera) Introducing the Pop-N-Rock Gourmet Carbonated Beverage Machine! Just pour in one of our six prepackaged flavors, add high fructose corn syrup, and enjoy the taste of a homemade soda, just like mom used to make! JERRY Does it have grape? LESLIE That doesnt matter, nobody from the Parks Department can enter the raffle. DONNA Oh my word. Look. The car arrives at the park. EXT. PARK LATE MORNING D3 The pavilion itself is now a giant tiki hut, a performance stage is set up right next to it, and giant banners of half-naked men surround. Leslie races out of the car.

LESLIE Tom! What is all of this?! TOM Isnt it great? Best part: pro bono. LESLIE This is supposed to be a pancake luncheon, not some Samoan coming out party! TOM Oh yeah the banners. Look Les those were a necessary evil, I promised to put em up in exchange for the decorations. RON (patting Toms shoulder) Youve really outdone yourself. A large bus pulls up. Jean-Ralphio emerges with a bunch of women. TOM Jean-Ralphio! Coming through once again! JEAN-RALPHIO (slaps hands with Tom) All I know how to do baby. TOM April and Andy, get these women leid! April and Andy start handing out leis. LESLIE How were you able to afford this bus? TOM Stop your worrying, I just used all the money I wouldve spent on decorations.

LESLIE And what about the women? TOM The hunnies came for the free food, concert, and of course, (gesturing to self) the TH. LESLIE OK, I can fix this. We just need to get all these women back in the bus and take down the banners before everyone gets here. RON (pointing) Your destiny awaits. A bunch of cop cars start arriving from one end, a second later two fire trucks arrive from the other. LESLIE Oh for Pawnee Petes sake. END OF ACT II

ACT III EXT. PARK NOON D3 The firemen and police officers start piling out, immediately noticing each other. The police chief runs to Leslie. POLICE CHIEF Knope! Is this your twisted idea of a joke? A beat. LESLIE Surprise! POLICE CHIEF We havent associated with those pole-riding fairies for nearly a decade, and now you want to remind us about what started the feud in the first place? April looks unsurprised at camera. The fire chief has arrived. FIRE CHIEF Who are you calling a pole-riding fairy you donut-brained desk jockey? POLICE CHIEF Im sorry, I cant hear you over the sound of your little fairy wings flapping! FIRE CHIEF Whats that? Im not fluent in wing dings. POLICE CHIEF Lets settle this once and for all then, my boys are gonna pound yours into the ground. FIRE CHIEF Im waiting!

LESLIE Gentlemen enough! Cant we put aside these petty differences? If you dont want to interact with each other then just sit on opposite sides of the pavil-, uh, tiki hut. TOM (holding leis) Who wants to get leid? INT. TIKI HUT NOON There are three long tables with the police on one end, the firemen on the other, and the party girls and parks department crew in the middle. Leslie is at the podium giving her speech. LESLIE Thank you all for joining us today for this unforgettable luncheon. For the first time since 2002, both departments enlisted to protect Pawnee are eating under the same roof. Though he is no longer with us, nearly a decade ago our beloved Pawnee Pete taught us a valuable lesson on that fateful Groundhogs Day. He taught us that we must always stay vigilant. He taught us that a town is only as strong as the seal on its manholes. And he taught us, that a hog in a drain can make both sides blind. (raises bacon) To Pawnee Pete! A beat. Only a few people clap. LESLIE (CONTD) Oh and if you havent filled out a raffle ticket yet, you can do so in the back. Alright thanks. RON TALKING HEAD

At the buffet line, piling bacon on his plate. RON It wasnt her greatest speech. INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT TABLE EARLY AFTERNOON Ann, Chris, Tom and Leslie are all eating, a few pretty girls are on the fringes. TOM That speech was crazy. That ending about rats in holes making people blindblew my mind. CHRIS I agree. I thought you did a magnificent job, Leslie Knope. I was literally inspired. LESLIE Thanks guys I appreciate it, I know it wasnt my best stuff though. I just hope it got through to them. CHRIS Well you cant please everyone all the time. You just have to do your best and hope that everything works out. LESLIE Youre right. I guess thats what Ill do then. ANN But isnt it also true that you have to work to show the other people how much you care? CHRIS

Not necessarily Ann Perkins. If people are too self-conscious to see your positivity, thats their problem, not yours. Ann looks exasperatedly at the camera. LESLIE Its out of my hands at this point. I just hope this doesnt completely blow up in my face. EXT. PARK EARLY AFTERNOON The cops and firemen are keeping their distance from each other. Tom and Jean-Ralphio approach a group of women. TOM Hello there ladies. The names Tom Haverford, but you can call me Tommy Timberlake. GROUP OF WOMEN Hey. TOM Oh and you already know my buddy JeanRalphio, hes the one responsible for this bomb party. Tom and Jean-Ralphio bump knuckles and make an exploding sound. JEAN-RALPHIO How are we doing tonight ladies? PRETTY WOMAN Its the afternoon. JEAN-RALPHIO Last I checked tonight does come after noon. The group of women looks at Jean-Ralphio with uncertainty.

EXT. STAGE EARLY AFTERNOON Andys band is performing. April, Ann and Chris watch on. CHRIS Well this has been just an awesome day so far. Dont you think so April? APRIL Peachy. April looks at the camera. ANN So Chris, what do you think of Andys band? CHRIS Rodent Sailors? I think theyre fantastic. ANN Yeah theyre definitely, unique. APRIL (snappy) Youre unique. CHRIS I am literally in love with this sound, reminds me of my college days. ANN So, what else are you in love with these days? CHRIS Well lets see, my grammy Mee Maw, kale, reruns of I Love LucyAPRIL

She wants to know if you love her. You two are beyond dysfunctional. April walks off. Ann and Chris look at each other. LESLIE TALKING HEAD Leslie is just outside the tiki hut. LESLIE You know, despite the rocky start I think this luncheon is doing alright. I mean, the police and fire departments arent really talking to each other, but if my parents taught me anything, its that a relationship based on strained silence is good enough. INT. TIKI HUT AFTERNOON D3 Leslie is at the podium and has assembled roughly half the people into the tiki hut. The rest are listening to the band and playing in the park. LESLIE And now its time for the main event, lets find out who won the raffle! April could you please hand me the winning ticket. April slinks up to the podium and hands Leslie the ticket. LESLIE (CONTD) Thank you very much. And now for the moment of truth, drumroll please. Jerry starts rapping his hands on a table, Donna shakes her head at this. LESLIE (CONTD) The winner of the first inaugural Groundhogs Day Remembrance Pancake Luncheon, and proud owner of a brand new

Pop-N-Rock Gourmet Carbonated Beverage Machine isRichard Macklin of the Pawnee Fire Department! All the firefighters cheer. POLICE OFFICER Thats bull, they probably rigged the whole raffle! All the police officers loudly support this. LESLIE Now, now guys there could only be one winnerFIREMAN We rigged it? What about the 2000 intramural basketball championship? You think we dont remember that no call?! All the firefighters become uproarious. LESLIE Guys, guys! Theres no reason to get so heated! Its just a raffle its not like the worlds going to end or anyAndys band sets off its first round of pyrotechnics far too close to the tiki hut. The noise is deafening. LESLIE (CONTD) What was that?! TOM Andys pyrotechnics! A woman outside the tiki hut screams. SCREAMING WOMAN The roof! The roof! The roof is on fire!

TOM We dont need no water let that mamajama burn! Camera pans to Tom, who smiles at it excitedly. Everyone panics and runs out from under the tiki hut as the thatch-roof becomes covered in flames. Chaos everywhere. A mans yell can be heard. DONNA Jerry fell in the manhole! EXT. PARK AFTERNOON D3 The fire has been put out and Jerry has been recovered from the manhole. Cops and firemen are seen interacting with each other. Leslie meets up with the rest of the office minus Jerry. LESLIE Just finished talking with the police chief. Is everyone OK? RON Im fine. Tried to save as many of these guys as I could. (raises bacon strip) We lost a few good men in there though. ANN Hows Jerry doing? LESLIE Oh hes fine dont worry about him. TOM How was he even able to fall in there? LESLIE I dont know, someone must have removed the manhole cover. Camera pans to April, who stares it down.

TOM Nah I figured that Knope, I meant that Jerrys huge! Id think he woulda just got wedged in there a bit. LESLIE I dont know Tom. All I do know is that this whole day has been a disaster. ANN Well at least the cops and firemen seem to be getting along for some reason. EXT. PARK AFTERNOON D3 B-roll: Several shots of firefighters putting out the fire, policemen saving Jerry and both departments working together. LESLIE (V.O) A funny thing happened here today. Just when all hope was lost, two accidents simultaneously occurred so that both departments could feel useful. Once they both saw how effective the other one was, well, the process of healing could begin. LESLIE TALKING HEAD Leslie is on the fringe of the park. LESLIE Coincidence? I dont think so. It really is serendipitous how both departments needed another hog to fall in the sewer before they could make amends. I truly believe that the inconceivable mysteries of a higher power guide this state. Now, nobody knows what it really means, but then again, I guess thats why Indiana is called the Hoosier state.

Just so long as theres peace in Pawnee, Im OK with that. END ACT III

TAG INT. PARKS DEPARTMENT MAIN OFFICE MORNING D4 Leslie, Ron, Tom, April and Donna. LESLIE I want to thank you all again for your great work yesterday. I know things didnt go as planned, but in the end, the job got done. RON And I would like to congratulate you, Leslie. Somehow, your blind persistence has once again trumped calm rationality. LESLIE Oh thanks Ron! RON That wasnt necessarily a compliment. TOM All I know is that party was bangin! I got two numbers, and only one of them was fake. Tom gives the camera a thumbs up. DONNA Mmm and the sexy banners you put up? Completely set it off. APRIL He only did that so he could get all of his pimped out luncheon swag. TOM Thanks for the assist April, but the loves still appreciated my Nubian queen.

LESLIE You know I still wonder though, why was that manhole open? EXT. PARK LATE MORNING D4 April and Andy are goofing around. APRIL Ill give you five bucks if you go touch the bottom of that sewer. ANDY How do I know youll pay me? APRIL Open it. Andy opens the manhole and April crumples up a bill and throws it down. ANDY Be back in a jiff, mlady. Andy climbs down the hole. His head pops up a bit later. ANDY (CONTD) April I cant find it anywhere. April soaks Andy with a water hose from off-screen, and he runs after her, leaving the manhole open. JERRY TALKING HEAD In the hospital by himself. JERRY You know, I think my luck is already turning around. As soon as I fell down there (holds up bill)

I found five bucks! END TAG