Sammy Essay

Download as docx, pdf, or txt
Download as docx, pdf, or txt
You are on page 1of 9

1

Effects of divorce on children

When parents decide to get a divorce or separate, their child or children have to encounter are faced with multiple stressors. Just knowing that things are going to be different after a divorce, it can be problematic and frightening for most children. but not knowing exactly how can be frightening for most children. Children from divorced families have to learn to cope with the many changes in their family home environment. The amount of contact with one parent, often their father, will be reduced. They may have more responsibility placed on them. The custodial parent may be physically and psychologically less available for children due to increased demands. Children of divorce may feel lonely. They may miss the intimacy, comfort and particular parenting skills of the absent parent. The parent at home may be so wrapped up in their own problems that they are not available to their children. Circumstances may have cut them off from their usual playmates. Children may seek intimacy and comfort elsewhere, or become withdrawn.(Mackenzie, C., 2007-2010).Often, children initially focus on these immediate negative effects of the family breaking up, such as .and do not find comfort in knowing that other families that have divorced eventually do okay.
Comment [T7]: Explain or list the negative effects Comment [T1]: It is a fragment Sammy, it needs to be a complete sentence Comment [T2]: Family twice in one sentence rebundancia Comment [T3]: Unclear and doesnot go with the paragraph Comment [J4]: If you are referring to the children its not clear and out of place I agree with Tania. Comment [J5]: Work load Comment [T6]: What demands? Need to put a sentence before explaning the increase of demands to the parents

Now days In the last two decades, we faced an increase of see lots of couples getting divorce, and most of them already have kids; and Tthey do not nt realize the effects that divorce can cause on their children.; Hhaving to see their parents separate and also having to separate from their brothers siblings can cause a lot of emotional problems. Also,, not having economy financial support from both sides may decreased their standards of living and cause financial problems., Inpoverty. In addition, also social issues can be created due to because children forced to may have to move from their family familiar home or change schools. They may have to live
Comment [T8]: Sounds weird, unclear

in two homes and that is like starting all over, Ssome kids do not nt know how to adapt to a new environment from one day to another, so it is difficult for them. .

Emotional problems are some of the consequences that children suffer asfrom being fearful of being abandoned. because Wwhenever their parents get divorce, one of them leaveleaves the

house and childrenthey may be scared that the other parent is going to leave too . This is creating insecurity and instability to the children. and that they are going to be lonely for the rest of their life. The many and often unavoidable changes that accompany divorce can undermine a childs sense of security and make them fearful of the future about whats next? Will we be poor, will we have enough to eat, will I have to go to a new school, will I lose my pet rabbit, and will I still see my friends? In short, they will fret about all the things that are important in their world.(Mackenzie, C., 2007-2010) Children of divorce may feel lonely. They may miss the intimacy, comfort and particular parenting skills of the absent parent. The parent at home may be so wrapped up in their own problems that they are not available to their children. Circumstances may have cut them off from their usual playmates. Children may seek intimacy and comfort elsewhere, or become withdrawn.(Mackenzie, C., 2007-2010). Children feel rejected by the parent that leave, and they think that they do not nt love them, that they dont or care about them anymore, and that it is the reason for them to leave. why they left. They also feel at fault because they think that their parents are getting divorced because of them, because they are not good sometimes, and they say or did something bad.As a result, so they feel guilty and embarrassed.
Comment [T11]: Too long and many run on sentence Comment [T10]: I move it to the previous paragraph it goes better. And this part has a good quotation already. Comment [T9]: Too long break it in at least 2 sentences

In general, the accumulation of multiple stressors and changes create difficulties for children. Recently, Crowder and Teachman (2004) found that the more often children in single parent families moved the more likely they were to drop out of school or become pregnant during the teen years. In general, the more stressful experiences that children encounter during divorce the more difficulty they will have. Ffor example, boys are more likely to be aggressive and have problems getting along with their peers and teachers., Ttherefore, spending less time in school or on their schoolwork. and On the other hand, girls are more likely to experience depression, interfering with their ability to concentrate on schoolwork or to put as much effort into their work. If the child's parents have difficulty coping with stress, the child's adjustment will be at risk, especially if the child has a 'difficult' temperament. A child with such a temperament will have significantmajor problems coping with anger when faced with disruptions in routine and when their parents experience increased stress and demands. These children may become more difficult to manage after the divorce. A child's adjustment to divorce will be quicker when fewer disruptions are caused by the divorceseparation and when an established routine is achieved.
Comment [T12]: TOO long, unclear

There is also evidence that indicates that children whose parents divorce more than once are worse off than children who only experience one parental divorce. Mothers and fathers are important resources for children. They provide emotional support and practical assistance as well as serve as role models for their children. (Hughes, R. April 10, 2009)

Finance problems is are really common in a divorce. Tthe parent who keeps theo children isare going to suffer economicaly inconvenience. like iIf the mother did notnt haved a job because she always stayed home taking care of the children and, then she gets divorced and keeps the children. Sshe is going to look for a job. and mMost of the time these woman have notnt

worked for a long time. Wwhenever they look for one a job, they have a gap in their work history. Sso, whoever is hiring themr is going to pay her less until she catches up and get more experience, and thats. This is really hard because now they are going to have to take care of the children and the pay the bills., and Tthe kids have to adapt and conform with to what the mother can give them. Income potential is something that affect the children as well. Llately the income potential between of a men and a woman are similar closer than ever; but most of the time thenonetheless, men have a better income, and. Iif the woman is the one who keeps the children, she is not going to be able to give them everything they used to have and this causes the children to be mad, unhappy, and stressed until they get use to. In some marriages, credit cards are run up, and the couple finds themselves in more debt than either of them can handle, and when they are getting divorce they have to pay all they owned. Therefore, bankruptcy is sometimes filed at the same time as a divorce to get rid of the marital debts, rather than splitting them up between two people who are incapable of paying them. Sometimes one of them doesnt want to pay or they dont have the money at that time and then is when they fight about money and end up worse than before and they dont even talk to each other and the children have to separate even more from one of them. (Turtenwald, k. March 25, 2011)

In some marriages, credit cards are run up, and the couple finds themselves in more debt than either of them can handle, and when they are getting divorce they have to pay all they owned. Therefore, bankruptcy is sometimes filed at the same time as a divorce to get rid of the marital debts, rather than splitting them up between two people who are incapable of paying them.

Sometimes one of them doesnt want to pay or they dont have the money at that time and then is when they fight about money and end up worse than before and they dont even talk to each other and the children have to separate even more from one of them. Turtenwald, k. March 25, 2011) (

Social issues aA lot of children pass through social issues, especially with kids that think that nobody pays attention to what they say or do anymore, and. Tthis happens when parents get divorced. theyParents get are depressed because they want to start a new life because. Tthey are feel alone, but they do notnt realize that their kids need more attention than ever. and Tthats is when the problems starts. Tthey have difficulties in school like Robert Hughes says, whether you use children's grades, standardized test scores, or dropout rates, children whose parents divorce generally have poorer scores. These results have been found quite consistently throughout a variety of research studies over the past three decades. Importantly, children's actual performance on tests consistently shows this difference, but results based on teacher or parent reports are less likely to show this difference. We believe that both parents and teachers often underestimate the difficulties a child may be having in school or may not recognize the problems. Negative self-concept is another social problem, like. Cchildren from divorced families are more likely to have academic problems. They are more likely to be aggressive and get in trouble with school authorities or the police. These children are more likely to have low self-esteem and feel depressed. Children who grow up in divorced families often have more difficulties getting along with siblings, peers, and their parents. Also, in adolescence, they are more likely to engage in delinquent activities, to get involved in early sexual activity, and to experiment with illegal
Comment [J13]: Where does the quote end?

drugs. In adolescence and young adulthood, they are more likely to have some difficulty forming intimate relationships and establishing independence from their families. There is a correlation found between children of a divorce and social skills. Experts suggest children of a divorce have more difficulties trusting other people, unconditionally. They tend to have less social contacts. Especially Yyoung children tend to cut social relationships after the divorce. Later in life, this can result in having difficulties building intimate relationships. Behavioral problems areis something common ion children of divorced parents they often are more aggressive toward their parents and teachers. Depression, learning difficulties and problems getting along with their peers are often perceived. The effect of divorce on children are negative, they more likely to be referred for psychological help, become earlier sexually active, are more likely to produce children out of wedlock and they are three times as likely to divorce themselves or to never marry. (Darcey, J. 2010) Children, like adults in times of adversity or trauma, go through a series of emotions following learning of their parents divorce. The child will grieve for the loss of their family and the daily presence and attention of their two parents, the only source of love and stability they have ever known. Often children will be in denial and pretend that the divorce is not happening, that it will just simply go away and everything will go back to normal. Once the reality of the situation sets in and they begin to realize it is not a dream, then sadness sets in and they will go through a mourning period. This often deepens into a depression, evidenced by apathy, mood swings, changes in behavior and eating habits and eventually this will turn into anger. They will become angry at their parents; possibly more so at the one they think is responsible.(Viklund, A., 2006)

In conclusion, parents need to remember that divorce is not easy for their children. A divorceand that it carries a lot of consequences as is mention earlier: emotional, economical, and social problems. that the cChildren, have to go through these problems and that it may influence their future. There are a number of factors that account for why children in divorcing families may have difficulties: loss of contact with a supportive parent, fewer economic resources that lead to multiple changes, more stress, poor parental adjustment, lack of parental competence and, conflict between parents. When these risks can be reduced or overcome, then children will fare better. That is why parents that are getting divorced have to understand that children may act in ways that are irritating and sometimes disruptive. This behavior is understandable because they are confuse and angry with the world. Most parents worry about the emotional effects of divorce on children. They may be worried enough to decide divorce is not the right thing to do and try to save their marriage, because for children of divorce the probability to divorce is twice as high as for children from normal families. They may recognize that divorce is inevitable but be plagued with concern about how it is affecting their children. (Mackenzie, C., 2007-2010)

Reference

Caroline Mackenzie. 2007-2010. Deal with divorce. Retrieved from http://www.dealwithdivorce.com/effects-divorce/emotional-effects-divorcechildren/30

Robert Hughes, Jr., Ph.D. Posted Apr 10, 2009. The effects of divorce on children. University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. Retrieved from http://parenting247.org/article.cfm?ContentID=646

Kimberly Turtenwald. March 25, 2011. Divorce's Effects on Economy. Retrieved from http://www.ehow.com/info_8110790_divorces-effectseconomics.html#ixzz1LLqkZa27 "Cause and Effect Essay The Causes of Divorce." 123HelpMe.com. 04 May 2011 http://www.123HelpMe.com/view.asp?id=11954

From Wikipedia. November 2009. Implications of divorce. Retrieved from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Implications_of_divorce.

D'Arcy Lyness, PhD. October, 2011. Divorce & Child Stress. Retrieved from http://endoflifecare.tripod.com/juvenilehuntingtonsdisease/id21.html

Jill Darcey.2010. Parenting with the Ex Factor. Retrieved from: http://www.children-and-divorce.com/effects-of-divorce-on-children.html

Andrea Viklund, 2006, Effects of Divorce on Children. http://www.sfla.co.uk/effectschildren.htm

You might also like