UNTITLED

By
Various

Gone Catfishing

EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES

A mail woman is walking down the street. She tries to
shove a couple of letters in an overflowing mailbox.
INT. MORNING, AN AVERAGE FAMILY HOME BEDROOM
LISA WILLIAMS watching the postwoman. She ducks every time
she thinks someone might be looking. She has bright green
nail polish, green eyes and dark brown hair. She turns
away form the window to see her dog on the bed. The dog
runs out of the room. LISA follows, passing several photos
of family, especially photos of her sister and her dog,
and far to many still rooms; the house is too big for one
person. In the corner of the kitchen, her washing is
drying.
Her dog BELLE is sitting in front of the door with a shoe
in its mouth.
She grabs a shoe, some scissors and some string.
INT/EXT. SLIGHTLY LATER MORNING
LISA is throwing the shoe out the front door and letting
her dog chase it then bringing it in. She gives the dog a
treat and it comes inside.
INT. HALLWAY NEAR THE FRONT DOOR
LISA is sitting on the floor holding her legs. Her dog
sits next to her. Theres a banging on the door.
DELIVERY MAN
DELIVERY!
Lisa remains sitting down, waiting for him to leave.
DELIVERY MAN
Come on lady, Ive already
unpacked the bags!
Lisa doesnt move.
DELIVERY MAN
Screw this.
The delivery man leaves.
LISA waits until shes 100% certain hes gone. Then opens
the door. Using a walking stick she keeps near the door,
she fishes in each bag individually. The moment all the
bags are in she sighs in relief. She grabs one with the
dog treats and feeds it to her puppy.

2.

INT. KITCHEN, EARLY EVENING

LISA cooks pasta for one. She pours it on to a plate and
plonks herself in front of the television, even though it
isnt on. Her dog sits on her mat, giving her "the eyes".
LISA has a couple of bits, then puts the pasta on the
floor for her dog to eat.
INT. EVENING, AN AVERAGE FAMILY HOME BEDROOM
LISA and BELLE are in bed. LISA is looking up ways to take
a dog for a walk without going outside on her computer.
She finds herself on a website written in Japanese, she
clicks the "translate this page" button in her browser and
tries to read the broken English. It advertises CLONE
DRONES. They are a drone who looks exactly like you, which
you can control through your computer.
She knows there is a ridiculously large chance this wont
work. But she buys it.
Scared, she pulls Belle up next to her and cuddles her as
she falls asleep.
INT. EARLY MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA and BELLE are standing and sitting respectively
staring at a large box human sized box. There are
documents taped to the box in a plastic sleeve, and its
covered with red tape. Everything is in Japanese. LISA
bends down and cuts the middle of the box open, revealing
herself. This is too much for BELLE to handle, she goes
and lies on her bed.
Theres no nail polish on the model, but apart from this
they are identical. She touches her face. This is weird.
She starts to mould it in her hands. It feels like shes
picking the yoke from an already cracked egg, spine
tingling.
She then notices something next to the drone head. A box.
She sits on the couch and opens the box, inside is an
instruction manual and a USB. She plugs the USB into her
laptop and ab installing screen pops up. Once its
completed a start up sound occurs followed by a blank
program screen with a list of options on the side of the
screen. Simultaneously THE DRONE stands up and opens its
eyes, brown instead of blue. The moment the eyes open,
its POV shows on the laptop screen.
Shocked, LISA leans on the arrow keys on the key board.
THE DRONE spins around and falls over. Once she falls, the
commands on the side of the screen move down and "Stand
Up," pops up to the top of the cue. She touches it, and
THE DRONE stands up. She then scrolls through the
commands, pressing them at random.

3.
"Blink"
THE DRONE blinks.
"Smile"
THE DRONE smiles.
"Bigger smile"
THE DRONE smiles harder.
"Twist"
THE DRONE twists.
LISA smiles and presses multiple commands at once.
"Smile"
"Jump"
"Fonzie Hands"
"Raise left arm"
"Cry"
"Disgusted"
"Jump"
"Pop and lock"
"Sneeze"
"Lift one leg"
"Jump"
"Excited"
"Walk"
THE DRONE tries to comply with all of them, succeeding for
a while, but then crashes, falling to the floor.
A reset button, appears on the screen. LISA presses it.
LISA makes the drone walk over to BELLE and the commands
"Cuddle", "Pat", "Rub belly" and "Razzle" move to the top
of the queue. LISA presses "Pat."
THE DRONE goes to pat BELLE and instead pats the air above
her.
LISA pulls and old library book from a shelf in her coffee
drawer.

4.

EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES

THE DRONE is walking down the street, sporadically,
carrying the library book as if it is a heavy cake. She
walks as if she is being controlled by arrow keys, with
extremely stiff knees.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA is on her couch with BELLE, watching what THE DRONE
is doing and eating an apple. Suddenly BELLE jumps of the
couch, LISA watches her go outside and THE DRONE walks
into a tree.
EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
THE DRONE crashes to the ground, losing the library book.
A nearby boy on a bike rushes over to help. THE DRONE lies
on the ground motionless.
UNKNOWN MALE
You alright?
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA hearing the sound turns back to the computer, seeing
a pair of feet standing over THE DRONE.
UNKNOWN MALE
Hello? Buddy? Are you alright?
LISA realising she has no idea how to react, desperately
reaches for the manual, trying to find out how to talk.
EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
LISA presses the "Nod" button, followed by the "Smile"
button, and THE DRONE performs both, on the ground without
moving its body. The UNKNOWN MALE smiles.
UNKNOWN MALE
Are you sure?
The UNKNOWN MALE reaches for her hand.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
The command "Hold hand," swoops to the top of the command
list. LISA presses it.
EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
THE DRONE takes the hand, but doesnt move any other part
of its body. THE UNKNOWN MALE tries to pull her up but it
doesnt move. LISA in a panic presses stand up, and THE
DRONE stands up without any assistance. The UNKNOWN MALE
has no idea what to make of this.

5.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA finally realizes that to talk you press the "Output
button and talk into the microphone. She anxiously speaks.
EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
After a pause.
THE DRONE
(Really loudly.)
Sorry.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA turns the output volume down.
EXT. MORNING.STREET
UNKNOWN MALE
For what?
(Beat.)
THE DRONE
I have a problem.
UNKNOWN MALE
Really?
(Beat.)
Im Patrick.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA says "Im Lisa" and presses the "Happy" command three
times to try and get THE DRONE to speak faster.
EXT. MORNING. STREET
THE DRONE
(Excessively excited and
happy.)
Im Lisa.
PATRICK
Ok. Returning a book?
LISA
Yes.
THE DRONE bends down and attempts to pick up the book
without bending her fingers.
PATRICK
Let me help you.
PATRICK picks up the book and his bike, and starts to walk
towards the library. After a short delay THE DRONE
follows.

6.
EXT. MORNING. OUTSIDE THE LIBRARY
PATRICK returns from inside and sits on the brick wall.
THE DRONE goes to join and over sits, falling backwards.
PATRICK stops her from falling too far. He laughs.
PATRICK
Why dont we get some coffee?
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA has accidentally pressed the "nod" button.
LISA
Shit.
LISA presses the "Shakes head" button.
EXT. MORNING. OUTSIDE THE LIBRARY
LISA
Like a question.
Ice cream?
PATRICK
Alright.
PATRICK looks at his bike, then at THE DRONE, who is
standing quite stiffly.
PATRICK
I might just leave this here,
just in case.
EXT. MORNING, NICE STREET
PATRICK and THE DRONE walk down the street together eating
ice cream.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA is trying really hard to control the arms of THE
DRONE. BELLE sits next to her on the couch.
EXT. MORNING NICE STREET
THE DRONE eats her ice cream, really slowly. PATRICK tries
not to laugh at her.
In front of them is a fat-bottomed lady, wearing a hat.
Shes eating a burger and drops its packaging on the
ground. PATRICK and THE DRONE look disgusted. She then
uses a baby wipe to wipe her face and drops it on the
ground.
THE DRONE looks at PATRICK.

7.

PATRICK
What a bitch.
THE DRONE
I dare you to steal her hat.
PATRICK
Well, can you, like run?
THE DRONE
I dont know, lets find out!
PATRICK starts to speed up his walk.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA watches from her computer, her finger hovering over
the "Run" command.
EXT. MORNING. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
PATRICK looks back towards THE DRONE, takes the hat and
sprints.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA excitedly presses the "Run" command.
EXT. MORNING. PARK.
THE DRONE and PATRICK run together, until they reach a
park and stop., laughing, PATRICK clutches his side, THE
DRONE isnt even panting.
PATRICK
Havent run, in a while.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA is laughing on her couch, as if she is really there.
Shes come back to life.
EXT. MORNING. PARK.
THE DRONE
Did you see her face?
PATRICK
No! I was running.
THE DRONE
It was so great.
PATRICK
(Looks at the hat)
I feel kinda bad.

8.

THE DRONE
Nah.
Patrick laughs.
PATRICK
What now?
THE DRONE
We have a hat?
PATRICK
We could get more hats?
THE DRONE
Yes, lets.
STEALING HAT MONTAGE.
EXT. AT A BUS STOP
PATRICK and THE DRONE, wearing the previously stolen hat,
watch a bus stop from behind a tree. A girl comes and sits
down. PATRICK comes and sits down directly next to her.
Its awkward. Finally, he grabs her hat and runs.
THE DRONE and PATRICK almost fall over from laughing.
EXT. BUSY STREET.
THE DRONE is tailing a HIPSTER. It looks towards PATRICK
and mouths "I cant", PATRICK shakes his head. No backing
down yet. She does a jerky movement and hits the HIPSTER
in the back of the head. He turns and looks incredulously
at her.
THE DRONE
(Shrinking)
Sorry!
She looks towards PATRICK, who looks unimpressed
EXT. BRICK WALL
PATRICK and THE DRONE appear at the same time, wearing
various hats.
PATRICK
Got it.
THE DRONE
Me too.
They smile then run off.

9.

EXT. AFTERNOON. STREET.

PATRICK and THE DRONE run together grabbing a hat on the
way. One of THE DRONEs hats falls off her head. They run
towards a wharf.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
An email pops up on LISAs computer from the Japanese
website, she opens it, effectively closing the drone
program. LISA clicks the translate button. The first thing
she sees in red letters is "Drone 7 hours, BOOM". She
looks at the clock. Its 5.00pm. She counts the hours on
her fingers. SHIT.
EXT. SUNSET WHARF
THE DRONE stops walking short of the end of the wharf. Her
hats slightly fall off her head. PATRICK takes them off
her and holds them.
PATRICK
I think this hat is my favorite.
THE DRONE doesnt respond.
INT. MORNING LOUNGE ROOM
LISA panics and runs out of the house, with no shoes on.
She leaves the front door wide open.
EXT. SUNSET WHARF
PATRICK turns to face her.
PATRICK
Hey, whats your "problem"?
THE DRONE doesnt move or reply. PATRICK turns away.
EXT. SUNSET. A NORMAL STREET LINED WITH HOUSES
LISA is pounding the pavement. She starts to panic,
realising what shes doing, but she doesnt stop running.
She glances at her watch. One minute. She comes across
PATRICKSs bike puts on his helmet and starts to ride.
EXT. SUNSET WHARF
PATRICK
No? No worries, I mean Ive had a
hat-tastic day.
Still nothing.

10.

EXT. SUNSET RUNNING NEAR THE WATER

LISAs panic is threatening to overwhelm her. She then
sees THE DRONEs lost hat. She doesnt pick it up but she
runs even harder.
EXT. SUNSET WHARF
PATRICK
Sorry I, wasnt trying to offend
you. Like I dont care.
THE DRONE is still motionless.
PATRICK
Sorry.
(Beat.)
At the end of the wharf, we see LISA running
PATRICK shuts his eyes and leans towards THE
kiss. LISA looks at her watch. Less than one
runs down the wharf and knocks THE DRONE off
Bubbles rise to the surface.

towards them.
DRONE with a
minute. She
the edge.

PATRICK leans back, but LISA grabs him and kisses him.
They break apart. PATRICK tries to figure out whats
different.
PATRICK
Wheres your shoes?
LISA shrugs.
PATRICK puts his favorite hat on her head.
EXT. NIGHT TIME BACKYARD
PATRICK and LISA are playing with BELLE in a cubby built
from the clone box and a sheet. One torch illuminates them
all.