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Amusing Questions

This document poses a variety of amusing questions on various topics including: bald men's hygiene routines, the placement of obituaries in newspapers, the meanings of idioms like "dirt poor" and "filthy rich", and word plays on phrases like "THE IRS". It also includes questions about occupations, sayings, grammar, and other lighthearted curiosities to provoke thought and perhaps a few chuckles.

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Samuel
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© Attribution Non-Commercial (BY-NC)
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102K views

Amusing Questions

This document poses a variety of amusing questions on various topics including: bald men's hygiene routines, the placement of obituaries in newspapers, the meanings of idioms like "dirt poor" and "filthy rich", and word plays on phrases like "THE IRS". It also includes questions about occupations, sayings, grammar, and other lighthearted curiosities to provoke thought and perhaps a few chuckles.

Uploaded by

Samuel
Copyright
© Attribution Non-Commercial (BY-NC)
Available Formats
Download as TXT, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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questions:

1. Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?


2. Why are the obituaries found in the "living" section of the newspaper?
3. How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?
4. When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'.
5. Are one handed people offended when police tell them to put their hands up?
6. How can sweet and sour sauce be sweet and sour at the same time?
7. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
8. If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?
9. Did Noah keep his bees in archives?
10. If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words
worth?
11. If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?
12. If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?
13. What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?
14. What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to
go?
15. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
16. When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
17. If your plan is having no plan, do you have a plan?
18. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he
become disoriented?
19. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called
Holes?
20. Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
21. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
22. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
23. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
24. When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts" and you put your two cents
in ... what happens to the other penny?
25. Why is the man who invests all your money called a 'broker'?
26. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to
begin with?
27. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
28. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives
a race car not called a racist?
29. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
30. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
31. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
32. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it
be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
33. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that
electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models
deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
34. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
35. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
36. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
37. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as
they get older; then it dawned on me . .they're cramming for their final exam.
38. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and
forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
39. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we
supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the
postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?
40. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the
others here for?
41. How come no one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is winning?
42. If we quit voting will they all go away?
43. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk I have a work station...
44. How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
45. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit
while you're ahead"?
46. Employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in case of an
emergency. I think you should write . . . A Good Doctor.

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