Screenplay

INT. SHAUNS CAR--DAY SHAUNS CAR pulls up in front of the movie theater. ANTHONY is in the passengers seat. They both stare at the entrance of the theater. ANTHONY I cant fucking do this dude. Turn the fucking car around-SHAUN Dude, youre gonna be fine! ANTHONY starts forcibly reaching for the steering wheel. SHAUN resists him. SHAUN (CONTD) Stop, stop goddamnit! SHAUN pushes ANTHONY off the steering wheel: hard this time. ANTHONY relents. ANTHONY Maybe theres somewhere else I could work! SHAUN Youve applied to sixteen places you dipshit. At once. Two weeks ago. This was the only place-ANTHONY Dude, I CANT FUCKING WORK HERE. DONT YOU GET IT? SHAUN (sarcastically) Why? Please, Anthony, tell me why you cant work here. ANTHONY The manager. SHAUN (beat) The manager? ANTHONY Yeah, the fucking manager. Look, when I finally got my interview... CUT TO: INT. OFFICE---DAY (CONTINUED)

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2.

ANTHONY is being interviewed by the MANAGER. The MANAGER has something off about him. Hes very skinny, has a really bushy beard, and a lazy eye thats drastically off center at all times. Hes sitting with ANTHONY in a small office room. The two are visibly talking as ANTHONY is noticeably nervous, unable to draw his attention away from the MANAGERs lazy eye. Hes truly distracted. ANTHONY (V.O) He was a fucking creeper dude! He had this one lazy eye but I knew it was all bullshit. ANTHONY (CONTD) He kept asking me about my hobbies or some shit. Past accomplishments. Who the fuck cares, Im working at a Movie Theater not fucking Microsoft. Then when I was done he was all like Have a nice day. No, you have a nice day, because I know youll be looking forward to breaking into my house and fucking raping me! CUT TO: INT. SHAUNs CAR---DAY SHAUN Ah, of course, the Managers a rapist, I should have known! Lemme put the car in reverse! Its for your own safety, thank God you spoke up! SHAUN puts the car in reverse and begins backing up. ANTHONY looks downward for a few seconds and then speaks up. ANTHONY Okay fine, Ill do it! SHAUN stops the car. SHAUN Hmm? ANTHONY Ill go inside... SHAUN Are you sure? Because I could go home if you want. I mean, they need to run those websites for somebody. (CONTINUED)

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3.

ANTHONY (annoyed) Look, Im gonna go inside, avoid eye-contact with Captain Creeper for the day, and see how it works out. ANTHONY gets out of the car. He leans into SHAUNs window to tell him something. ANTHONY (CONTD) Oh, and Shaun? Try to stay in the area in case--SHAUN (laughing) Oh, fuck off. Ill pick you up at six.

SHAUN drives off. ANTHONY My grave is on your head! ANTHONY walks towards the doors of the theater. CUT TO: INT. MOVIE THEATER--DAY ANTHONY approaches the GUEST SERVICES desk. MARK is waiting to assist him. MARK is morbidly obese, mid-twenties, long unkempt-hair, and a deadpan expression. MARK (deadpan) Hi, welcome to Cinema Gusta. Can I help you? ANTHONY Im...in uniform. I work here. MARK (deadpan) Oh...just gimme a second. MARK approaches the other side of the desk, facing away from ANTHONY. He picks up a walkie-talkie.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: MARK (deadpan) Can I please have an available manager to the Guest Services desk to assist a new employee. He doesnt know where to go.

4.

Theres a beat until ANTHONY realizes what just happened. MARK called a manager...and not just any manager, but the manager that interviewed him! ANTHONY looks up towards the upper floor of the cinema in horror as the manager exits his office and starts walking towards the elevator. ANTHONY (whispers to self) Oh, fuck dude! ANTHONY (CONTD) (nervous) No, stop--Mark--he doesnt need to come all the way down here! You can just show me around! MARK (deadpan) Dont be silly, he loves helping out new employees. Sometimes, he even throws these really cool parties in the Managers Office, where its like this one-on-one interaction, and he like, gives you this special custom welcoming and shit. Its really cool, I still remember mine! ANTHONY (nervous laugh) Yeah, that, sounds, yeah, great. DRAMATIC MUSIC in SLOW MOTION as ANTHONY looks towards the exit door. Hes only been here for a matter of minutes and is already sweating profusely. He turns around, about to make a break for it, when... DATHAN (O.S) Salutations! ANTHONY turns around to the MANAGER, who we see is named DATHAN. ANTHONY waves awkwardly. DATHAN Man, dont be too excited! Come on, Ill show you around.

(CONTINUED)

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5.

DATHAN begins leading ANTHONY towards the theaters concession stand as ANTHONY gives off a fake smile. We now see a montage of ANTHONY learning the ins and outs of the theater. The popcorn machine, cleaning the bathrooms, selling tickets, washing 3d glasses, you name it. He appears to be lightening up more and more as the montage progresses. At the end of the montage, we see ANTHONY and DATHAN laughing it up together as if theyve been lifelong friends. That is, until... CUT TO: INT. MENS BATHROOM STALL---DAY ANTHONY is on his cell phone, frantically waiting for SHAUN to pick up. ANTHONY Come on, come on!! God dammit. SHAUN picks up. He holds his cell phone in between his right cheek and his shoulder as he plays XBOX. SHAUN ...hello? ANTHONY I cant do this dude. I swear he is after me. SHAUN Who? ANTHONY The manager! Hes after me! SHAUN Lazy-eye manager? ANTHONY Yes!! SHAUN Dude, gimme a break. SHAUN looks at the clock. Its 3:30. SHAUN (CONTD) You realize youve only been there for an hour right?

(CONTINUED)

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6.

ANTHONY Yes! I know!! I had to fake my friendship with the dude because his lazy eye was going wild and I couldnt take it any longer. It was all I could think about, its like he had this fucking rapist laser zoning in on me, ready to knock me out and make me his bitch! SHAUN ...wait, where are you? ANTHONY Im hiding in the handicapped stall in the bathroom. No one could question me because I might be a cripple. SHAUN Hm. Smart. ANTHONY Thanks. SHAUN Anyways, you really need to calm down. Your logic is fucking retarded. ANTHONY Dude, Im honestly concerned for my life right now. The least you could do is give a shit! SHAUN Look, just go back out there and do what you went there to do. What did you go there to do? ANTHONY (beat) Get money. SHAUN And why do you wanna get money? ANTHONY (beat) So I could get the power...and then the women.

(CONTINUED)

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7.

SHAUN There you go, now youll be fine. Oh, and Anthony? ANTHONY What? SHAUN (laughs) Dont drop the soap! SHAUN hangs up, cracking up. ANTHONY (at phone) I fucking hate you!