Wendie Kidwell never planned to leave her teaching career to work in mental health, and she sure never expected she’d be opening a nonprofit, but just two-and-a-half-years after she lost her oldest son to suicide, Ricky’s Retreat will be opening to the Onslow County community.
Ricky’s Retreat was started in 2022 after 22-year-old Ricky Kidwell, Swansboro High School graduate and track state champion, died by suicide. Wendie said Ricky endured a long battle with mental health, struggling specifically with severe anxiety.
He attended the University of North Carolina Wilmington on a scholarship for track.
“A lot of young people aren’t really ready for college, but they feel sort of like society tells them they need to go,” Wendie said. “Ricky really wanted to run for a top-tier school, and he was scouted all over the state, but decided he wanted to go close by.”
In the summer of 2017, Wendie said Ricky began dabbling in alcohol and marijuana, self-medicating his underlying anxiety and mental health issues.
So, Wendie took him to the doctor, where he was prescribed medicine to help with his struggles.
“If you use it correctly, it can be helpful, but unfortunately, a lot of young people struggle with using it correctly,” Wendie said. “He did not use it correctly when he was away at college, and he took too much, ended up in psychosis, and was in and out of mental health hospitals.”
Ricky ultimately died by suicide on April 16, 2022.
Just days after his death, Wendie said she had a vision, one of what Ricky’s Retreat would become.
“I literally saw what it was, what it looked like, what it was going to be,” she said. “I felt like, really? My son was just taken, and now, like this is the mission? But I always knew that Ricky was going to do something big with his life.”
Wendie said she envisioned the future property of Ricky’s Retreat as a house on the water, one on stilts with a distinct tree line to the right. She had no idea how close to the truth that vision would be.
Although Wendie has been running Ricky’s Retreat out of her garden at home for the last couple of years, she always knew it would need to grow into a larger space. That’s when she met Mai Whelan.
Whelan is a Swansboro resident and U.S. Navy veteran who first made headlines earlier this year after winning “Netflix’s Squid Game: The Challenge.” She took her $4.56 million winnings and settled in Onslow County.
She told The Daily News at the time that her passions include animals, mental health, and the environment, and she’s been working to both support local nonprofits, and create her own, ever since.
The two women met after a local news reporter told them about each other, having done stories with each woman previously. Then, Wendie saw a Jacksonville Daily News story in the paper about Whelan. She didn’t think much of it at first, but as the days went by, she couldn’t stop thinking about Whelan and her desire to help local nonprofits.
“I think I just sent her a short email, something about who I was, what the nonprofit was, and if she was interested, to contact me,” Wendie said. “She contacted right away, and she came to the garden the next day or two. I felt like I always knew her.”
Whelan had purchased a large piece of property right beside her home in Swansboro, with plans to bring several nonprofits together in collaboration.
Whelan’s home? A house on stilts, on the water, with a distinct tree line to the right.
The property has several buildings, one of which serves Ricky’s Retreat’s needs, with the other serving as an indoor training facility for Paws of War Eastern North Carolina. The two organizations have already started collaborating, and next door, Whelan is working to acquire 10 more acres to turn into a wildlife sanctuary.
She said it’s important to her to focus on the smaller nonprofits.
“I focus on the small ones to get them off their feet, get them up and running,” Whelan said. “The smaller nonprofit is about passion and it’s a personal story.”
Wendie said she struggled with anxiety and alcohol use throughout her life herself, but when she was growing up, the idea of mental health wasn’t nearly as widely accepted or talked about.
“There are so many young people that struggle with the exact same things that Ricky did, and by using our lived experiences, we know we can make a difference,” Wendie said.
Wendie is also a recovery resource advocate for the Alcohol Drug Council of North Carolina, and a certified peer support specialist.
Ricky’s Retreat will be a safe space with outlets for people who need them. There’s an art room, a library with a writer’s nook, a peer support room, and even The Cave, a sensory space dedicated to those who are neurodivergent or have autism.
Having comfortable outside spaces is important too for mental health, Wendie said, so the property has various outdoor furniture, a fountain, hammocks, and of course, it’s right on the water.
Ricky’s Retreat even has two designated flower boxes at Swansboro Municipal Park.
Wendie and Whelan also hope some of the young community will want to volunteer in the future, especially with Swansboro High School, Swansboro Middle, and Queens Creek Elementary just down the road.
Ricky’s Retreat is opening on Thursday, Oct. 31, and will be open Thursdays only for now as they get things going. Anyone and everyone is welcome, and can reach out to the organization through Instagram, Facebook, and on their website through the contact form.
Wendie said responses will come quickly, and there will always be at least two people working onsite during open hours for those who need help or someone to talk to.
“We’re moving slowly because we want to be a place of excellence,” Wendie said. “Not perfection, but in order to make sure we develop excellence, we have to move slowly, make sure we have things in place.”
Ricky’s Retreat is located at 107 Ray Lane in Swansboro. For more information, visit rickysretreat.com. Whelan will also soon be releasing her new show “Mother Mai,” a series where she traveled across the U.S. discovering hidden nonprofits.
Whelan will also be releasing a book later this year. Keep up with her website, YouTube Channel, and social media for updates and more information.
