Yahtzee: It's quite a while before you even glimpse a monster and let me just transcribe my thought process at the time. "Dum-di-dum, well this isn't very scary. Oh look, physics! I can throw chairs around like a removal's man who's completely stopped giving a shit. Doors suddenly blowing open in the wind? Yawn-o-rama! Guess I'll just look around upstairs and then play Halo: Reach for a bit. Nope, nothing much up here either. I'll just go back and... whoa, what was that thing I just glimpsed running down a hallway? I don't know, but it looked pretty cross about something, so I think I'll go down this other hallway instead. Oh, it's blocked. Guess I'll turn around and... WHERE DID YOU COME FROM? WHAAA! RUN, RUN, RUN! I'M SORRY I DIDN'T MEAN TO MESS YOUR CHAIRS UP! OH, PISSING BLIMEY, THERE'S JAM COMING OUT OF THE WALLS!"
