Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    From $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    My Secret Life as a Sex Addict: How I Repaired The Damage
    My Secret Life as a Sex Addict: How I Repaired The Damage
    My Secret Life as a Sex Addict: How I Repaired The Damage
    Ebook109 pages1 hour

    My Secret Life as a Sex Addict: How I Repaired The Damage

    By Paulina Pantyleva

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    It was only the fourth day of the cruise and I was already on my seventh penis. 

    I met Jack at the pizza station by the pool. I went there to binge on pizza, partly because pizza is delicious and partly to punish my bad behaviors with food. I just wanted to engorge myself with cheese, crust, and s

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPlatypus Publishing
    Release dateApr 24, 2023
    ISBN9798218199531
    My Secret Life as a Sex Addict: How I Repaired The Damage

    Related to My Secret Life as a Sex Addict

    Related ebooks

    Addiction For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • UNLIMITED

      The Child Within

      Jul 13, 2022

      The Child Within
      6 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Ricky Ross

      Jun 28, 2021

      Ricky Ross
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Total Wipe Out

      Sep 15, 2022

      Total Wipe Out
      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      How To Be Happier

      Jan 19, 2024

      How To Be Happier
      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Blonde BOMBSHELLS

      Feb 15, 2024

      Blonde BOMBSHELLS
      7 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The RACE of GENTLEMEN

      Feb 27, 2024

      The RACE of GENTLEMEN
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Exes And Nostalgia

      Jun 18, 2019

      Exes And Nostalgia
      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Courtney Byers

      Dec 2, 2019

      Courtney Byers
      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Nothing To Fear

      Jan 26, 2021

      Nothing To Fear
      8 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Have You Been Duped?

      Mar 14, 2019

      At one time or another we have all wondered if the person we are speaking with is on the level. Some of us are good at spotting fakes and cons, while others get scammed repeatedly -- financially, emotionally, in life and love. Being scammed or the v

      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Gory Stories

      Jun 5, 2022

      Gory Stories
      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Diddy’s Rap Sheet

      Sep 27, 2024

      Diddy’s Rap Sheet
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      AI Is Running Circles Around Robotics

      Apr 4, 2023

      When people imagine the AI apocalypse, they generally imagine robots. The android assassins of the Terminator franchise. The humanoid helpers of I, Robot. The Cylon armies of Battlestar Galactica. But the robot-takeover scenario most often envisioned

      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      A Temporary Arrangement

      Oct 2, 2023

      A Temporary Arrangement
      19 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Overcome Victim Mentality

      Nov 3, 2020

      A VICTIM MENTALITY MIGHT be easy to spot in others but not so easy to recognise in ourselves. The first step is to notice the symptoms of this type of mindset – feeling out of control, thinking you are unlucky in life and believing that the world is

      1 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Deep Impact

      May 31, 2020

      Deep Impact
      9 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      A Born Creative

      Jan 28, 2022

      A Born Creative
      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Listen UP!

      May 14, 2024

      Listen UP!
      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The Art Of The compliment

      Apr 14, 2022

      The Art Of The compliment
      6 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Love Story

      Apr 22, 2022

      ‘She looked into his handsome, craggy face, his black hair blowing in the cold wind. He smiled at her, tracing his finger lightly down her arm. She shivered and, misunderstanding, he took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders, holding it clo

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Under the Depression Helmet

      Apr 19, 2019

      Under the Depression Helmet
      10 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      5 “I Am Truly Living My Purpose”

      Jan 26, 2024

      Aftergraduatinginmusicaltheatre,Ididtwointernational shows in The Netherlands before returning to South Africa in 2010. I was invited back for another show and I came back home in 2011, when I started working on popular soapie Rhythm City, which I wa

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      New Year, New You

      Feb 1, 2024

      It's the same for us at Money. We began refreshing the magazine in December, and our new year's resolution is to keep providing you with cleaner pages, easier navigation and informative graphics. We will also add some exciting content as the Year of

      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Euthanasia

      Aug 10, 2023

      On a frigid December morning, Hank Sanders stomped the caked mud off his worn boots and entered Discount Hardware. He couldn’t shake his cousin’s remarks. Put her down, he’d said. The words had rolled so effortlessly off his lips, as if her life mean

      11 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      You’re With Us On This Journey

      Nov 22, 2022

      WE DON’T HAVE TO look very far to see hurt in the world. As if the underlying uncertainty, anxiety, and trauma in our own lives were not enough, we’re surrounded by countless examples of suffering in the world—climate change, pandemic, war, economic

      2 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for My Secret Life as a Sex Addict

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      My Secret Life as a Sex Addict - Paulina Pantyleva

      Paulina Pantyleva

      My Secret Life as a Sex Addict

      How I Repaired the Damage

      First published by Platypus Publishing 2023

      Copyright © 2023 by Paulina Pantyleva

      All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. It is illegal to copy this book, post it to a website, or distribute it by any other means without permission.

      Second edition

      This book was professionally typeset on Reedsy

      Find out more at reedsy.com

      Publisher Logo

      This book is dedicated to my husband, Richard, whom I love with all my heart. He suffered due to my sex addiction as well. Yet, he was able to distinguish me from the addiction itself and for that, I am eternally grateful.

      Epigraph

      Kintsugi Vase

      When a ceramic bowl breaks into pieces, we often see it as garbage.

      In Japanese art, potential beauty is seen in reconstructing the broken pieces. The pieces are held together with gold lacquer. The more repair that has been done, the more valuable the vase.

      It is the imperfections that make it more beautiful.

      That is my cover art.

      That is me.

      Contents

      Foreword

      I. DOES SEX ADDICTION REALLY EXIST?

      1. Hard Earned Wisdom

      2. Decades of Dysfunction

      3. Am I The Only One?

      4. This Is Just An Excuse To Cheat

      5. What Is Sex Addiction?

      6. It’s Not About The Sex

      II. OVERDOSING ON SEX

      7. Sex For Trade At A Young Age

      8. My Great Escape

      9. Like a Dog In Heat

      10. For a Smart Person, I Did Really Dumb Things

      11. Some Things Are Still Hard To Explain

      12. Fucking for Survival

      13. The Fun Factor is Long Gone

      14. Forever in Search of Extremes

      15. Are There Any Good Looking Swingers?

      16. Toxic Triangles

      17. Food/Fuck Flip Flop

      18. Binge Eating is my Other Drug

      19. It Was Hard To Be Married to Me

      20. Working For Free

      21. Prioritizing My Own Self-Destruction

      22. Internet Makes Access Easy

      23. My Mind Makes My Body Sick

      24. I Broke

      25. My Rock Bottom

      III. MY RECOVERY

      26. The Healing is Spiritual

      27. The Problem Had Been in My Mind

      28. Making Sense of the Nonsense

      29. Embracing My Tormented Self

      30. Reflections on My Father

      31. Putting the Pieces Together

      32. Repairing the Damage

      Afterword

      Foreword

      By Dana Lee Chapman

      When the world feels like it’s just too much to handle, humans will find all sorts of ways to escape the overwhelm. For my client Paulina, the author of this book, sex and food became the go-to ways to get through the harsh pressures, responsibilities and realities of life.

      Sex can provide a sense of love, satisfaction, gratification, nourishment, connection and indulgence. So can food.

      Food can fill an empty hole. So can sex.

      Until they can’t.

      My name is Dana Lee Chapman and although I am known as The Diet Recovery Coach who helps women heal from the collateral damage of diet culture, including food dysfunction and body image issues, the heart of what I do with my clients is repair the relationship they have with themselves, regardless of the affliction or addiction.

      After nearly 30 years of working with women who have dysfunctional coping mechanisms, the number one thing that has made the greatest and most profound impact in their lives is their willingness to deconstruct and then reconstruct what it means to truly love themselves, making Paulina’s artwork you see on the cover an ideal and beautiful representation of this entire fragmented process.

      Paulina and I met a few short months after one of the most painful events in her life which brought on binge eating episodes like never before.

      The event is something she writes about in a later section of this book. It is a pivotal point in her own journey when she fell to the depths of what, she later learned, was required to turn her life around. The fact that she can even write about it in such an insightful and reflective manner is a testament to how far she has come on her path to recovering from both sex addiction and food addiction in such a short amount of time.

      It took her roughly a year from decision day when we began our work together to when she completed the writing of this book. When you are *in it* and are experiencing excruciating emotional pain just wanting to be on the other side of the recovery already! it may seem like a year is a long time to take to turn things around.

      However, a part of what made the transformation possible is the approach. I encouraged her to go slower than she’s ever been willing to go because if she paced herself, she would experience more effective and permanent change. Although she was anxious and rushed through our work in the beginning, she did see the value in switching gears and eventually gave this approach a shot.

      Healing will take as long as it takes. While you can use a pivotal event as the catalyst to make a decisive change, the more gradual, introspective, and mindful you are after that commitment to yourself, the more accelerated and lasting the impact.

      As Paulina discovered through our work together, it’s not about the FOOD and, that quickly translated to mean it must not be about the SEX either. As it turns out (spoiler alert), these are just the placeholders that symbolized her innermost beliefs regarding self-worth and her value in this world.

      An unfortunate truth is that sex addiction in our society and our culture is far more acceptable and prevalent to discuss in regard to men than women. Paulina and I both agree that needs to change.

      Because our work together helped Paulina uncover a deeper understanding as to why she did the things she did, she made a decision that none of it would go to waste. Sharing the real, raw truth

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1