Flying Can Be Fun

Airplane ... An invention of two bicycle mechanics from Ohio perfected on the sands of the Outer Banks at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. Precursor of the Frisbee.

Abeam ... A fix, point, or object approximately ninety degrees to the right or left of an aircraft's flight path, most often a runway.

Abort.. . Most commonly used command by flight instructors to student pilots, often retroactively made to mothers of student pilots.

Aerial... That part of the aircraft most frequently broken off during walk-around pre-flight inspection to see if anything is broken off.

Aero .. . That part of the atmosphere which lies over Great Britain.

Aerodrome... English word for airport. What you'd expect from a country that gives its airplanes names like Gypsy Moth and Fairey Battle Bomber.

Aileron ... A hinged control surface on the wing which scares the hell out of airline passengers when it moves. Also, an eron that is sick.

Airfoil.. . That part of the airplane which foils the pilot's efforts to fly it—usually anything connected to the stick.

Airplane .. . An invention of two bicycle mechanics from Ohio perfected on the sands of the Outer Banks at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. Precursor of the Frisbee.

Air traffic controller ... A federal employee, usually a retired tobacco auctioneer, assigned to a major airport to keep aircraft from landing in unison by giving rapid instructions over the radio, most of which mean to go away and come back again—preferably after the air traffic controller is off duty.

Airworthy . .. The line on the clipboard checksheet that the ground mechanic marks after finishing a pint of whiskey.

Aisle ... The narrowest part of any jetliner, usually equal to the widest part of a flight attendant.

Alternate airport... Designation given to New York's LaGuardia Airport for a flight bound for Chicago's O'Hare Airport from New York's Kennedy Airport when the flight is over Fort Wayne, Indiana.

Altitude ... That part of the atmosphere above a pilot whose engine has just conked out.