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    Are You the Unchurched?: How to Develop an Authentic Relationship with God inside or outside of Church
    Are You the Unchurched?: How to Develop an Authentic Relationship with God inside or outside of Church
    Are You the Unchurched?: How to Develop an Authentic Relationship with God inside or outside of Church
    Ebook107 pages1 hour

    Are You the Unchurched?: How to Develop an Authentic Relationship with God inside or outside of Church

    By Gabrie’l J. Atchison

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    About this ebook

    The "Unchurched" are Christians who do not attend regular church services. Unchurched Christians tend to be Progressive, independent-minded, and critical thinkers. Many of us are looking for ways to form community with others irrespective of race, background, or sexuality. Do you see yourself reflected in these definitions of the Unchurched? If so, Gabrie'l J. Atchison has written this book for you!

    In this book, Atchison lays out a path for you to connect (or reconnect) with God, whether you choose to do this inside or outside of a church. The tools you will need to relate to God are already inside you. As you set out on your journey, you will find that the best expression of love for God lies in loving all of God's people and by caring for all of God's Creation. The author's hopes are that you will have increased joy and purpose in life, and that you will feel better able to show compassion to others and to yourself.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherCascade Books
    Release dateJul 11, 2022
    ISBN9781666711677
    Are You the Unchurched?: How to Develop an Authentic Relationship with God inside or outside of Church
    Author

    Gabrie’l J. Atchison

    Gabrie'l J. Atchison, Ph.D. has earned the degree of Master of Religion from Yale Divinity School with a concentration in Women's Gender and Sexuality Studies (WGSS). Her doctorate is in Women's Studies and she has advanced degrees in African American Studies. Dr. Atchison teaches courses in Africana Studies, Gender Studies and Sociology, regularly as an adjunct professor; she has worked as an administrator for the Episcopal Diocese of Western New York and currently serves on the board of the Western New York Peace Center and as the local chapter president of the Union of Black Episcopalians. She lives in Buffalo, NY with her beautiful, hound mix, named Jack!

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      Book preview

      Are You the Unchurched? - Gabrie’l J. Atchison

      Introduction

      Are You the Unchurched?

      One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, Of all the commandments, which is the most important? The most important one, answered Jesus, is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these. (Mark

      12: 28–31

      )

      Recently, we have seen several studies about a group of Christians who have been defined as the unchurched. Unchurched defines a group of people who identify as Christian and yet have not attended church in more than six months. They are also known in our community as the submarine Christians (so called because they surface only a few times a year) or CEOs (which stands for Christmas and Easter Only). Other members of this group may not set foot in any church until a wedding, baby blessing, or funeral draws them in. And these are the people who voice concern about the church burning down simply because of their presence.

      Christian research institutes started to study unchurched Christians, because the church as an institution is dying.¹ Churches have lower attendance, and as a result, most cannot stay afloat without the offerings and tithes of parishioners. As society changes, the role of formal religion in family life has become less significant. In most parts of the country, people who would still identify as Christians do not attend church on a regular basis. Many young adults have grown disillusioned with the church. In the past, teens and young adults would stop attending church regularly as they began to venture out and learn about the world. However, in the past, those who left church tended to return later as they had children of their own and faced major life challenges. The recent trend is that young people do not return to church, and a new generation of children is growing up without any connection to the church. Whereas some churches can pay insurance, bills, and staff expenses, most are hemorrhaging, trying to keep the doors open for aging parishioners and a handful of families. The purpose of the research on unchurched Christians was to help pastors and other church leaders figure out what to do to attract more people into their churches and to retain their young people.

      The purpose of this book is not to save the institution of the church. What drives me is a desire to encourage Christians to find and nurture an authentic relationship with the God of their own understanding. You may find that relationship inside a church or on a park bench, at the beach, or while listening to a song while you are stuck in traffic. What is important is the relationship. All that is important is your relationship with God! By strengthening our relationship with God, we are compelled to love ourselves and to love other people as an expression of that love.

      Whereas other books have been written about the unchurched, I am interested in writing to the unchurched. In my search to reach this population, I have found that earlier studies have unearthed some important common characteristics of people who fit into this category. Many unchurched Christians—both young and old—are simply independent thinkers. They are free-spirited individuals who value critical thinking. The rituals and practices of traditional church services do not have meaning to them, and so they find church attendance boring, irrelevant, and a waste of time. Some are adults who were forced to endure church as children, with no context or building of their faith, and therefore stopped attending as soon as they became adults. In many instances, the behavior of other Christians in church was the main factor in driving people away. Churchgoing Christians tend to be described as rigid, judgmental, or hypocritical.

      Overwhelmingly, young adults who were studied named hostility towards lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ+) people as the reason they do not attend church. While most young churchgoers believe that the Bible does not condone homosexuality, their conviction about this is waning, and they are embarrassed by the church’s treatment of gays and lesbians.² Many heterosexual Christians would prefer a worship space that is open and welcoming to LGBTQ+ Christians, especially when they have family and close friends they would like to invite to church. Many unchurched Christians call themselves spiritual but not religious, because they cannot find any energy or spirit within the church. And finally, there are among the group those who are survivors of clergy or lay leader sexual abuse, who find church to be a very unsafe space.

      The central value identified through interviews with Christians who do not attend church is a desire for connection. They yearn for ways to form community with others with whom they can share a collective sense of purpose. They are looking for fellowship and a space where everyone will be loved and accepted. The studies concluded that churches can reach this population by having special events that bring together church members but are welcoming to all in the community. Churches need to position themselves to serve the needs of people in the community outside of church walls. The church as an institution has fallen short for many in this regard. 

      Based on my understanding of the research, the unchurched are Christians who are:

      •College-educated

      •Progressive

      •Forward-thinking

      •Independently minded

      •Seeking

      •Critically thinking

      •Community-oriented

      •Generous

      •Compassionate

      Do you see yourself reflected in these definitions of the unchurched?

      If you are the unchurched, my goal in this book is to convince you that Christianity, freed from rigid, biblical interpretation, can be dynamic, relevant, and life changing. One set of concepts, relational theology, provides some tools for Christians to connect, or reconnect, with the God of their own understanding. In the next section, I will introduce these concepts as the foundation for my ideas.

      Relational Theology as a Path Forward for the Unchurched

      Theology frames the way we talk about and think about God and how we form an understanding of God in our lives. Relational theology is a way of thinking and talking about God that places the relationship between humanity and God at the center of Christianity. My goal is to offer you some tools from relational theology to help you connect (or reconnect) with God. These tools can help you find purpose, support, and direction in your life.

      Thomas Jay Oord, professor of theology and philosophy at Northwest Nazarene University, has contributed the most to the field of relational theology. In Relational Theology: An Introduction, Oord describes relational theology in this way:

      At its core, relational theology affirms two key ideas:

      1

      . God affects creatures in various ways. Instead of being aloof and detached, God is active and involved in relationship with others. God relates to us, and that makes an essential difference.

      2

      . Creatures affect God in various ways. While God’s nature is unchanging, creatures influence the living and loving God, and creation makes a difference to God.³

      The first idea, that "God affects creatures in various ways, loosens up traditional images of God as far above us and in the clouds. In this way, God moves closer and becomes an intimate part of our daily lives. God is a loving entity with whom we can relate. The second part of Oord’s assertion, that creatures affect God, may be harder to accept. Within relational theology, we need God, and God also needs us. For those of us brought up in traditional Christian churches, it may seem wrong and even irreverent to consider our relationship with God as reciprocal. However, I read this idea as a call to action. We are called to continue or complete the work done by Jesus Christ when he was here. Christ has no body now but yours, Teresa of Ávila stated, no hands but yours. Yours are the eyes through which must look our

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