Tirumalai Jain

Tirumalai Jain

E.R. Mason

Smashwords Version

Copyright 2021 by E.R. Mason

All rights reserved

All characters in this book are fictional, and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

Editors

Frank MacDonald

Contact: [email protected]

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Sam Thornton, PE PhD

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[email protected]

ISBN: 978-1-7328697-7-6

1Chapter 1

R.J., how can we be going to Earth? Look at you, you’d stand out like a sore thumb. You’ve got no beard and no hair. You look like a walking phallic symbol.

I have immersed myself in the cleansing pool of Ramu, the fountain of creation, the purification from all materiality. One must be free of all imperfection to do so.

Wait, all? Are you saying you removed all the hair on your body just to go in that thing? Do you have any hair on your body at all?

Not a one.

Oh my God, you’re a human noodle!

I am free of all unnecessary physicality.

And yet you’re wearing farmer’s coveralls, a T-shirt and sneakers.

I am purity existing within materiality.

Does the word normality fit in there anywhere?

Consider yourself, oh unenlightened one. You are Lord of the Manor here on the garden planet Enuro. You should be dressed in knee-high riding boots with a vest and cravat. Instead, consider those worn Earth jeans you’re wearing with a New York Jets T-shirt, your day old beard, uncut brown hair reaching down to your shoulders, your six-foot-two frame marching around like every woman’s dream. Compare the two of us. What do you see?

I see me walking beside a human popsicle.

Yes, while I am forced to accompany a Neanderthal who has forgotten where he left his cave and his woman.

Hey, I’m not lost. Both suns are on our left. We just go straight ahead through those trees and we’ll hit the horse trail.

"By the way, Elachia said I could go, provided Fantasia came along."

R.J., what are we, kids needing our mothers’ permission to go somewhere?

Close. Did you ask Fantasia for permission?

I do not ask for permission to do something, R.J.

So what did she say?

It just so happens she wants to come along.

So she doesn’t trust you.

It’s been a while since we all visited Earth. She just wants to go.

I’ll bet it was the Acrua Maru incident. You really got us in deep on that one.

"I was stuck on that moon, R.J. It wasn’t my fault!"

You realize that until you showed up the planet Lemoria was a peaceful self-governing world, its people enjoying luxurious android servant lifestyles.

God, don’t remind me. I think my left hip is still sore.

I’ll disguise myself on Earth. I’ll wear a false beard and wig.

R.J. if you wear a false beard and wig you’ll look just like yourself.

You’re just never satisfied. Anyway it’s a two-week trip to Earth, by then I’ll have erupted back into Cro-Magnon man.

You know, that could be your superhero name.

Faster than a speeding bullet, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound?

Who, disguised as a mild-mannered noodle….

Hey! I don’t believe it!

What?

I do believe you’ve found the trail, sir.

Not saying nothing.

Go ahead, gloat. Modesty does not become you.

We looked up and down the narrow well worn trail. Dense overhanging tree limbs made it look almost like nature’s tunnel. Streaks of golden light broke through in some places. I did not know which way to go but was unwilling to admit that, besides I had a 50-50 chance.

She may have already passed by here.

I shook my head. No. She would have been running him. We would have heard the horse hooves from a long way off.

We go to the left, correct?

Of course.

I wonder how far away Fantasia is?

Not far. Maybe a minute or two.

R.J. stopped. Are you getting that from the link?

Yep.

Tell me something, how is it for you with the link, after this much time I mean?

To be honest, I love it. She’s always there in my heart. Always feels good there.

R.J. resumed walking. To be accurate it’s in your solar plexus you feel that. Even more accurately, your anahata chakra.

What about you and Elachia? Are you still comfortable with that connection?

I love the link also. I’m glad to hear you do. I was a little bit afraid I might be losing myself in it.

I nodded. I have no idea how that mad scientist doctor managed to give them the power of the link with their chosen mate but I’m thinking he did us a huge favor.

Yeah, that trip we took on the Star Seven was one of the worst nightmares I’ve ever lived through but I’m grateful I was there. It was the worst of times and the best of times as Dickens put it.

I think that’s backwards.

You know, that creature on the Star Seven really was a Jabberwocky.

Oh boy. Here we go again.

And has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy. O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

Yeah, I’m over the moment.

Let us go galumphing back then.

I stopped. Do you hear something?

This sand is full of glints of real silver.

Hold up a second.

The sound of a horse at full gallop faintly filled the air. It was coming from up ahead. They came around a turn in the distance; Fantasia’s silver veiled dress billowing in the air behind her. She was barefoot. Her horse’s nostrils flared from the run. No saddle. No bridle. The two of them working as one, both equally enjoying the moment. She looked like an angel riding out of heaven. I became hypnotized by her as I always do. The scene became slow motion. She slowed and trotted up to us. I stood with a doofus half grin.

R.J. said, You always ride so beautifully, Fantasia.

When I bestride him, I soar. I am a hawk. He trots the air. The earth sings when he touches it. The basest horn of his hoof is more musical than the pipe of Hermes. I’ve been studying Shakespeare for our trip to Earth.

R.J. added, I think Shakespeare would have been inspired.

Shouldn’t you two be headed back to the manor? It’s the other way.

R.J. gave me a terse look. I rolled my eyes.

Fantasia laughed, gave me a daring look and galloped on. To me, it looked like slow motion again.

It’s the other way, said R.J. dryly.

Well okay, if you’d rather take the short route.

We turned around and started walking.

So Elachia is sending us the false paperwork for the trip, complete with our false names, said R.J.

Oh, that should be a riot. Please tell me you didn’t have any say in what name I got.

Fantasia is supposed to be securing commercial passage for us.

Remind me again, are we wanted criminals on Earth or legendary heroes?

It just goes to show how much damage you can do in only six seconds.

There you go, blaming me again.

"Hey, if they knew you were coming some people would probably show up with signs saying all is lost."

Why isn’t Elachia coming? I know you told me but I forgot.

She has an important seminar with the Enuro High Council. She’s a speaker for interplanetary relations.

So all four of us will be away.

Yes, but our little blue people will take care of both estates with loving care.

You were kind of blue yourself there a while back, weren’t you?

How dare you bring that up.

My bad.

I should remind you that you were the one who fell for the story that Fantasia could get pregnant just by being near someone for too long?

Like I’d have any chance at resisting her anyway.

Yeah, you know how our women are in bed.

Though she be but small, she is fierce.

That’s my line.

In the distance a small cloud of silver sand told us someone was coming. A moment later a small open speeder came into view driven by a petite blue woman with long blue-gray hair wearing white cargo-styled clothes. It was Geni, one of our manor house managers.

Alas, we are saved from you! exclaimed R.J.

She pulled up smiling and let the tiny hovercraft settle.

Geni, can you give us a ride? I asked.

Certainly, my lord. I was just on my way to tell Lady Fantasia the soup is almost ready.

What kind of soup? asked R.J.

Many kinds, sir.

We jittered the vehicle getting into it. Geni rotated it back in the direction from where she had come and took off at a pace that seemed unsafe but male vanity prevented either of us from mentioning it. We sped through the section of woods I had nicknamed Sherwood Forest. It reminded me of the irony that Fantasia’s castle was adorned here and there with fancy examples of real suits of armor. Enuro had never endured a period similar to the Dark Ages, but they had watched Earth survive that age and had been enamored by the courage shown during the Crusades.

We broke out of the forest. Lake Menoir was on our left and ahead, far across green fields, were the towers of the manor-castle. On a crest of rolling fields on our right horses grazed. The lead stallion Emperor raised his head at our passing. There was a psychic greeting between the two of us. We had come to know each other well.

Geni dropped us at the main entrance steps then zoomed off into the woods.

Inside the castle’s receiving area near the base of the grand staircase we were greeted by four-foot-tall central wing manager Lua, silver hair down to her butt, short cream-colored skirt over pink leggings. With a big blue smile she said, Sir, the soup is ready.

R.J. persisted, What kind of soup did they make, Lua?

A soup of many flavors, sir.

I nodded appreciatively, Lua, could we have our soup in the east sitting room?

Right away, my Lord.

And would you tell Fantasia that’s where we are when she gets here?

Of course, my Lord.

She dashed off, seemingly happy to have important information for the kitchen staff. R.J. and I headed off to our favorite den of reclusion. Within the heavily decorated, high ceiling chamber we took our favorite seats by the huge unlit stone fireplace. R.J. fiddled with an end table and pulled out his pipe and tobacco.

A purified man smoking a pipe?

He ignored me and packed the pipe. A long stem lighter put fire to it.

This pipe is hand carved from a single piece of rosewood. The tobacco is natural, gathered wild from the forest, dried and seasoned locally. It has natural ingredients that sooth the sinus tracks. It is not carcinogenic.

Touché.

Lua appeared carrying two heavily carved deep brown steaming wooden bowls on a silver tray. The smell triggered my stomach. She carefully placed a bowl on each of our side tables, paused to see if there was anything else, then said, Chef has asked that you please not eat the bowls. They are intended to preserve the flavoring.

I considered the difficulty that would be involved in trying to eat my bowl but Lua dashed off before I could ask.

Wooden spoons, commented R.J.

To keep the soup hot, I think.

Oh my God this is good!

If it was any thicker it wouldn’t be soup, I replied.

Oh my God this is good! repeated R.J.

Oh my God, it is!

Every spoonful tastes completely different but better!

Maybe there’ s drugs in it?

Either way I’ll have seconds.

Now I understand why she said not to eat the bowl.

Fantasia came cruising in the door still wearing her sheer riding veil and still barefoot. She carried a bowl of the soup in one hand and a paper-thin tablet in the other. She smiled at us and eased slowly down into her red, high-back chair.

She put down the tablet and smelled her soup. Oh my God, this soup is so good!

I gave her a narrow stare. You’ve had it before?

He only makes it when the second moon is full. I can never tell if that really has anything to do with it or he’s just pulling my leg, as you earthlings say.

Who cares? said R.J. as he shoveled soup into his mouth.

Fantasia asked, Did he tell you guys not to eat the bowl?

We nodded.

I can never tell if he’s serious about that either.

As we neared the bottom of our bowls, Lua appeared with three more. We continued in silence.

As I neared the second soup halfway point, a flash of light in the center of us suddenly gave way to a translucent image of Fantasia’s sister Elachia. The image spoke, The passports and other paperwork are complete and will be delivered to you shortly on special tablets. Do not lose them, children.

She must be referring to you, said R.J.

I couldn’t stop eating long enough for a comeback.

Elachia disappeared. R.J. began slowly eating his soup again.

What the heck just happened? I asked between spoonfuls.

Fantasia answered in a matter-of-fact tone without looking up. Four-way link.

I paused with a spoonful halfway to my mouth. You and Elachia can create psychic holographic group links?

Elachia is much better at it than I am but yes, when three of the four are in close proximity a group link can sometimes be created.

You never told me that.

It never came up until now.

But there was even an image of her?

Yes, the close proximity of the three provides a much greater degree of astral energy which can be used in that manner. Of course no one else could see that image of Elachia except we three.

I ate my spoonful and wondered what else I did not know. We quietly finished our soup. R.J. relit his pipe.

Fantasia said, I’ve booked us on the Serenity Nova. It is a holomatter deck-based ship. You will both enjoy it.

Care to elaborate? I asked.

Yes. All of the suites are furnished by holomattergrams. So are most of the communal areas. Many of the staff are also holomatter. You do not feel the same confinement you experience on most ships. All chambers can be of any size and design the hospitality managers choose. They typically alter the environment of various rooms on a daily basis.

I could go to sleep in one place and wake up in another? I asked.

No. You control the environment of your own suite.

The entertainment is holomattergraphic? asked R.J.

Yes. Performances by almost any artist you can think of. The facilities are equally diverse. They have a twenty-minute water slide that takes you through canyons and waterfalls.

What’s the travel time? I asked.

It’s been shortened to ten days. They have a jump-stop system. Halfway through the trip they are able to compress the warp field and jump five days off of the Enuro-Earth leg.

Why would a cruise ship like that have an Enuro-Earth connection? I asked.

They are willing to adjust their travel route in some cases.

Sounding pretty luxurious to me, commented R.J.

"Fan, you didn’t buy that ship, did you?" I asked.

Certainly not. That would be decadent.

R.J. laughed. I could create a holomattergram of myself.

Fantasia smiled. Spacesuits are available for guests who would like to visit the star deck.

I asked, What happens when we get to Earth?

Fantasia nodded. The Serenity Nova is not designed for orbital insertion. We will be met by a contracted shuttle outside of Earth orbit. The shuttle will take us directly to Chennai Spaceport. We’ll pass through customs and immigration there. Our paperwork will be quite good. Our true identities should not be detected by any government agencies. I’ve obtained clothing for both of you. We will need to blend in during passage through several different social settings. An air taxi will take us to Arani. We will meet with Parth Sharma there. He’s made arrangements for us.

You bought clothes for me? It’s not like robes, is it? I asked.

No, silly. The Tirumalai Village is a major tourist site. You can wear almost anything as long as it’s respectful. I didn’t want you walking around in a flight suit or something else that might make you more recognizable. You’ll have casual tourist clothing with dark sunglasses. You don’t want to end up signing autographs and alerting the wrong people to who you really are, do you?

No.

You’ll also have appropriate clothes for the caves.

Okay.

R.J. bit down on his pipe and snickered.

Chapter 2

The Serenity Nova was spectacular. It almost seemed as though the ship was made entirely of contoured windows. From space the forward bridge section looked like the nose of a Klingon battle cruiser. The bareness of the receiving hanger did not prepare you for the living areas. The instant the elevator doors closed we were ascending a kind of space elevator overlooking a well-populated star system. There was a sombrero galaxy on our right and a distant pulsar on our left. It was like spacewalking without a suit.

What I assume was a standard hallway leading to our suite looked like the Sistine Chapel, and though I knew the real walls must be within nine or ten feet of us for the life of me I could not detect them. Our suite was an arched open door that slid open for us. I barely got off a wave to R.J. as he entered his.

The suite was heavily decorated and furnished. Fantasia tossed her satchel onto the nearest chair. I expected it to fall through the hologram to the floor but it did not which left me wondering how to tell which things were real and which were not. It was a large suite. At least it looked large. The kitchen area was sectioned off by a bar. As I stared at it, a man in a black and white tuxedo appeared behind the bar. He called to me, would you like anything Mr. Arnt?

Me? Oh, no thank you.

The bartender disappeared.

Fantasia laughed without looking up from her satchel.

What’s so funny?

You, Mr. Arnt. What a perfect alias.

Yeah, how’d I get that?

It’s just the T in Tarn, moved to the end. The paperwork forger always makes everyone’s names as close as possible to their real names so they react to people speaking to them better.

So what’s my first name?

Adrie.

How about R.J.?

He is Arjay Miths. I am Fanaise Arnt. Do you like the room? I selected conventional to start with.

It’s fine. Are those waiters going to be popping up all the time without warning?

He appeared because you were staring at the bar-kitchen area. It’s not random.

Geez. If I stare at the bed will a naked woman appear?

She laughed again. You could have relations with a holomattergraphic character but it would be like making love to a statue.

Really?

Although I understand there are add-on options that can be purchased on the ship’s net to make them more sentient.

Oh brother.

You’re not thinking of….

I gently took her arm to interrupt her. I shook my head. I kissed her lightly on the lips and smiled.

What a wonderful trip this is going to be, she said and she went about putting her things away.

I asked her to show me the bedroom. She gave a quizzical stare and led me there.

Later, I awoke on the bed wearing nothing at all, wondering if it was a holographic bed. Fantasia was faintly snoring beside me. Clothes had been left on a chair for me. Light-colored tourist slacks and loafers, both of which I winced at. The robin’s egg-colored short sleeve golf shirt was okay. I realized I’d not even taken the time to inspect the suite. In the main living room there were two sitting areas with reading chairs and tables here and there. In one corner near curtained windows was a heavily carved oak desk and high back chair. There were heavily engraved ivory images on the ceiling and off-white carpet on the floor. I looked at the kitchen and wondered what real food might be stocked there.

The butler appeared.

Yes, Mr. Arnt?

Can I get a nice fat multi-layer sandwich and a beer?

My butler went to an odd-looking food dispenser, pressed a button to make a silvery screen disappear and behind it were both items. He brought them to the counter and looked at me to see if that was the right spot.

Anything else, sir?

I came to the counter and watched him disappear.

Was the sandwich holographic? This place was taking some getting used to. It tasted like turkey and ham, lettuce, and tomato. I could feel it in my stomach so that meant it had to be real, right?

A voice came from overhead. Mr. Arnt, you have a call from Mr. Miths. Will you accept?

Yes.

Mr. Arnt, this is Mr. Miths, shall we conduct recon?

I’ll meet you out there in the Sistine Chapel.

Roger.

Fantasia was awake when I looked in. She smiled and stretched.

Want to come exploring? I asked.

You go ahead. I need to visit the shops. It’s a moral imperative as you so often say.

We’ll be hanging out in one of the lounges on the promenade wherever that is.

I’ll find you.

R.J. and I followed the huge, glamorous false hallway to the nearest elevator. We stepped in. The doors closed and we were suddenly in a glass elevator in the deep sea ascending to the surface. Ocean life swam around us. Through the glass floor the ocean bottom fell away.

Promenade deck, I said.

Lights on the tiny control panel blinked acknowledgement. A large tiger shark followed us up.

The doors opened to a giant, four story gallery of shops, theaters, restaurants, game rooms and lounges. We choose a drinkery with a name I could not pronounce. Inside we sat at a luxurious bar and looked at menus illuminated in the surface of the counter. It stepped through many languages apparently trying to identify ours which it never did.

How are your translators working? I asked R.J.

Just fine. Those Euronians know their translators, he replied.

Let’s hope the bartender are just as good.

Oh, they’ve gotta be. I’m guessing she’s a hologramian.

Good one.

We were approached by a sizzling red head with hair down to her waist. Her eyes and nose were unusually small, but her red lips a bit too wide. Yes, Mr. Arnt, Mr. Miths? It’s my pleasure to serve you. What would you like?

Do you have bourbon? I asked.

Her eyes went blank as a computer somewhere searched the records.

Yes. We have that.

With ice, please.

And you, sir?

R.J. answered, Do you know what a martini is?

Blank eyes again. Yes. We have several versions.

Let me have your most popular version then.

Very good, sir.

I only had time to glance at R.J. and say, Things are looking up, and the drinks were in front of us.

We sipped and scanned the lounge. It only took a few seconds to realize we were the only humans in the place. People were sitting at tables in front of a stage with a piano which looked like it had melted in a fire even though the colorful keyboard was fully intact. There were other brass instruments along with items I did not recognize.

The assortment of guests was diverse. A few looked very nearly human but ears and eyebrows set them apart. Other non-human guests needed child seats to raise them up to table level. A few species were completely unknown to me.

The band appeared on stage. They were