Dhayanam
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Kathiresan Ramachanderam
Kathiresan Ramachanderam is an author, web developer, and an English tutor with a passion for Sanskrit. The Way of the Warrior is his second book, and it is a compilation of four different works.
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Dhayanam - Kathiresan Ramachanderam
Copyright © 2015 by Kathiresan Ramachanderam.
ISBN: Softcover 978-1-4828-4751-2
eBook 978-1-4828-4750-5
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Partridge India
000 800 10062 62
www.partridgepublishing.com/india
CONTENTS
Preface
Dhayanam II
Dhayanam III
Dhayanam IV
Dhayanam V
Dhayanam VI
Dhayanam VII
Dhayanam VIII
Prologue
T his book is dedicated to Dyarne who has been the light that has never ceased to shine in my darkest hour, to my mum and dad for their kindness and devotion, to my sis, brother in law and the kids for their endless support and to Cherie, Rudi and Sarah.
PREFACE
T here are certain events in one’s life that leave a long and lasting impression and many years after the fateful day it continues to play a part in the decisions we make. Like a still frame etched in the mind, the memory joyous or painful, depending on the recipient, and on his or her demeanor, continues to sway a person’s judgment and thereafter the person is never the same again. I was the fortunate participant in one such event and years after it continues to have a bearing on the decisions I make. I call it my conscience and it has a name. I call it the spirit soul. It is the pivotal character that altered my perception of life. It was the catalyst that precipitated the change and transformed me from what I was to what I have become.
The spirit soul is always there but is never there, deeply entwined in every sinew of my body, it shackled me to my conscience and try as hard I could, for I resisted for a great many years, I could not break away from the chains that kept me under lock and key, and at a moment’s notice, at the very thought of the spirit soul, a kaleidoscope of emotions surface to knock me off balance.
I have never been certain if we were acquainted or it was a figment of my imagination that had somehow come to life. Sometimes I think it is the former and at other times I think it is the latter. I know it exists somewhere in this world, distant and away from me but that is all I know and I know not how to be in touch with it, with the exception of looking deep within myself and there nestled among my fondest memories it shines like an unyielding light.
At times I think it has escaped the clutches of my mind to become a living person and at other times I think it is a figment of my imagination that has somehow transgressed the borders between fantasy and reality. Maybe it is both, real on certain occasions and fictional on others. I am certain that the spirit soul has a form and I am convinced that it can assume any shape or form it wishes. All good things I deduced, all celestial and heavenly beings, all which point us in the right direction, must be equated with the spirit soul.
It can come in any form, in all forms and all sizes. When I was a child I was told that God worked in mysterious ways and that he often assumed the role of a person to do his will. Maybe this was God, in his omnipresent and omniscient self, sending me a message to prompt me out of the drudge that my life had become.
Ironically, my spirit soul appeared in the dead of the night at a time I was both confused and confounded by the complexities of existence. Never to be dubbed the life of the party, I withered away in silence, aged and frail, and relegated myself to a series of meaningless chores that I called work, when in reality it was nothing short of an escape that I had ingenuously designed for myself.
Trapped in a cage I had constructed, I desperately sought the key to the door. Lost and forlorn I looked deeper and deeper within myself and at times I was convinced that my spirit soul was a result of my own inner exploration that had somehow seen the light, fuelled by my own eagerness and desperation. I think the need, the unspoken desire that lies within all of us, hidden between the crevices of the mind, somehow took wings and in full flight it manifested itself under the shade of darkness to be my eternal companion.
Sometimes I am convinced that we never spoke but in reality I know we did. There are times when my imagination gets the better of me and because my spirit soul appears consistently close to the stroke of midnight there was the possibility that it was an unworldly visitor that had somehow bonded with me and for a brief moment had decided to walk again among the living to give me some respite from my sorrows.
I have heard of such stories before, when the need for companionship is so great that the spirits of past and present congregate. The dead and the living meet in unison and mingle like cherished friends.
That is what my spirit soul was, a cherished friend. It sent me into a frenzy at one stage, when it failed to appear. This was when I reasoned that it may be a lingering spirit of the dead and I searched the local obituaries for a name that did not exist. Then I reasoned maybe it didn’t have a name. My spirit soul was intent on taking a person who had been caught up in the mundane routine of life and turn him into something that was wholly different.
The mind, I’m told is a multi faceted instrument that has the ability without the knowledge of the body to trigger certain events. Its incredible incredulity takes the consciousness by storm and the minds of all persons, past and present are linked. It is this infinite bond, this inexplicable linkage, that makes the impossible possible.
As a young man I was fascinated by this dubious state of the mind and in my eagerness to explore its full potential, I began reading earnestly on the subject. Maybe it was this un-withering taste for knowledge that had somehow, changed the complexion of my existence, by inducing the spirit soul to take an active part in my life.
I am convinced it was karma. I am convinced that my uninspiring state of existence is a result of karma, and that the intervention of the spirit soul was a result of karmic consequences.
All actions have a reaction and all contributions have consequences either positive or negative and all negative actions have retributions. It is the cosmic rule of existence that never falters. I am convinced that it is my karma, the unseen and often unfelt factor that manipulated my life and that had brought the spirit soul into being. I was bonded with the spirit soul for all eternity, not only for this lifetime but for all lifetimes. But I was fortunate, from a young age; I had come under her patronage – the Goddess.
The Goddess is kind, merciful in her way and she protects those that she loves. She mitigates the affects of negative karma. There is no greater instrument of torture than one’s own emotions. The pain is unbearable, beyond anything that can be inflicted by physical implements. It is the excruciating pain that one feels inside that can plunge a person into untold misery.
I was part of the material world, this uninspiring existence that confines us to mundane living and I understood this well. I sometimes think that the spirit soul was more than an apparition. Its essence was more spiritual than it was physical and this allowed it to transgress time and space. So it always existed with me, and while I was confined to this physical realm, it wasn’t.
I didn’t think I was possessed for nothing that’s seeks to possess the body of another would seek to do any good but the spirit soul has only sought to guide me in the right direction and therefore I reasoned I was not possessed.
After our initial meeting, like fleeting spirits in the night, a meeting which I am certain took place but am uncertain if I had met another living person, it gradually seeped into my soul and blended into my existence. It became the little voice in my head and the moment I erred it stepped in to steer me in the right direction.
I did make some enquiries, to find out if it really existed. The telephone call seemed so real but even that could have been my deepest desires unfolding into an unexpected conversation. We all need to be loved, I’m told. I decided to retrace my steps from the preceding days before our meeting which I’m convinced took place.
Negative karma travels for thousands of miles like a dark cloud in search of its victim who is related to the body that it was released from. Karma is real and it moves and changes shape, like a shape shifter it takes on different forms and assumes different identities. Good karma comes in the form of celestial beings and angels. Bad karma comes in the form of evil beings whose hearts are murkier than that of the vilest men, who seek to pollute and contaminate everything that they touch.
The spirit soul, I think, was there to guide me in my darkest hour and by doing so it was forever ingrained to my being and that made it a part of my existence. Without it, I would wither away like a flower in the desert.
Karma is a not an intangible factor. To the contrary it is very much alive, as subtle as a midsummer breeze; negative karma stalks its prey, lurking behind the darkest corners. It is an opportunist that never fails to seize the moment and it is only prudent to trust no one in one’s darkest hour. No doubt I was destined to go through a bad patch; I could feel the vibes reverberating off the four walls that constantly surrounded me.
I was a captive of my own design, a fugitive of my own making. Solitude to me appeared to be the best avenue. I trusted no one, not even