Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    From $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live
    Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live
    Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live
    Ebook147 pages2 hours

    Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live

    By Alli Baldocchi

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    I am an Autism Mom. That took me years of tears and confusion, laughter and pain, fighting and advocating, plus rationalizing and self-blame... to say and really feel.  It wasn't because I was ashamed or secretive about my son's diagnosis, I was actually very loud and proud.  As parents of special needs kids, we want to protec

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherNova Riley Publishing
    Release dateAug 4, 2020
    ISBN9781734211412
    Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live
    Author

    Alli Baldocchi

    I am an Autism Mom. That took me years of tears and confusion, laughter, and pain, fighting and advocating, plus rationalizing and self-blame... to say and really feel. It wasn't because I was ashamed or secretive about my son's diagnosis, I was actually very loud and proud. As parents of special needs kids, we want to protect them from the label. I too was afraid to let this label, this "Autism Mom" define me, become me, swallow me whole. And just as I have treated my son as a person, as a kid, as CADEN, not as an Autistic being, I have learned that I am Alli, I am me. And yes, I am an Autism Mom, but I am so much more. My careers in fashion, teaching, real estate, and interior styling, were not a waste. I have taken bits and pieces from each career, each step in my journey, to help me grow and arrive where I am today. I am a present, living my life with purpose. I feel and I love. Every small moment is noticed, and I continue to grow with each breath I take. I have joy and gratitude. I have come so far and know I have a long way to go, but I trust that I am exactly where I am supposed to be today. Now I share this journey and help others on theirs. Sitting in a place of overwhelm, not having a direction can be paralyzing. Your life can be different if you have someone guiding you, giving you the tools, you needed to bring back joy to your everyday life with unshakable confidence, clarity, and purpose. You can become your future self. I did and you can too! I am an autism mom and so much more!

    Related to Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live

    Related ebooks

    Relationships For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • UNLIMITED

      We’ve Got This.

      Sep 1, 2022

      We’ve Got This.
      12 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Out Of The Woods

      Nov 25, 2021

      Out Of The Woods
      10 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Social Justice Parenting

      Jun 2, 2022

      Social Justice Parenting
      11 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      ‘We’re Caught In Mid-air’: Raising A Child With Autism In Georgia

      May 25, 2019

      From individual therapy to special education teachers in schools, parents of children with autism in Georgia face a constant battle with the authorities to provide the services their children need.

      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Autism Awareness

      Apr 14, 2022

      Your article about the woman who was diagnosed with autism at 44 (YOU, 10 March) struck a chord. I can totally relate to Wendy’s relief at finally having an explanation for her struggles. I was officially diagnosed with autism in November 2021, three

      1 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Acceptance Needed For Those With ASD

      Apr 3, 2021

      APRIL marks Autism Awareness Month and director for Action in Autism, Kirsten Miller, said while awareness is needed, respect and acceptance of those with neurological differences is also needed. “Autistic people have called for neurotypical people t

      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Should You Invite Your Spouse to Join You in a Divorce Workshop?

      May 26, 2021

      As a financial planner, I participate in many different types of workshops, including for divorce. Due to the pandemic, these days they are usually webinars.  Divorce is no exception. Should you suggest to your spouse that they should join you in a d

      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      A Letter To… My Champ

      Sep 3, 2020

      A Letter To… My Champ
      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The Reason I Jump

      Feb 25, 2021

      The Reason I Jump
      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      High Schools Of Horror

      Feb 10, 2021

      High Schools Of Horror
      8 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Drug Combo Could Repair Fetal Alcohol Damage

      Jul 21, 2017

      Two drugs may erase the learning and memory deficits caused by fetal alcohol exposure when given after birth, according to new research with rodents. The finding potentially makes way for a treatment for fetal alcohol spectrum disorders. “We have ide

      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      An Autism Diagnosis That Changed Their Life…

      Sep 16, 2019

      Susan Botha, a 40-year-old widow from Paarl, lives in a two-bedroom shack with her five children. The shack is in her mother’s garden and consists of one bedroom and a kitchen. Unemployed, with social grants as a source of income, Susan was constantl

      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Coping with ASPERGER’S

      Jan 25, 2023

      Advice from our Woman’s Weekly doctor Asperger’s syndrome (also now included in a condition called autistic spectrum disorder) is commoner than previously thought, affecting over one in 100 of the UK population. Historically, more men were diagnose

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Sick for Attention: Meet five Munchausen patients who went to desperate lengths to fake illness.

      Nov 24, 2016

      Marc Feldman has spent more than 25 years studying fakes, but the bespectacled Alabama-based psychiatrist still vividly recalls the woman who introduced him to what became his life’s work. It was in the early 1990s, when he was a newly minted psychia

      16 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Naoki Higashida

      Jul 29, 2017

      The Japanese author of The Reason I Jump and Fall Down 7 Times Get Up 8 describes what it’s like to be a person with nonverbal autism

      2 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Phases Of Depression

      Feb 15, 2021

      Phases Of Depression
      6 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Early Childhood Adversity May Lead to Health Issues by 9

      Nov 6, 2017

      Living through multiple adverse experiences—such as the death of a parent, growing up in poverty, physical or sexual abuse, or having a parent with a psychiatric illness—before the age of eight may be linked to depression and physical health problems

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      My two FAMILIES

      Jan 2, 2020

      Like every other adopted person, I have always struggled with my identity, wondering whether I was a product of nature or nurture? Would I have been a completely different person had I been raised by my birth parents? I loved my adoptive parents dear

      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Top 5 Books By Autistic Authors

      Jun 28, 2021

      The Wainwright Prize-winning book by talented teenager McAnulty is a poetic love letter to the natural world and a shining example of an autistic person being their best autistic self. A series of beautiful missives to the weird women of history whos

      1 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      DEPRESSION And How To Help Beat It

      Jun 10, 2021

      DEPRESSION And How To Help Beat It
      2 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Not Broken - How My Son with Autism Taught Me to Live - Alli Baldocchi

      Not-Broken-front-cover-ebook.jpg

      Copyright © 2020 Alli Baldocchi

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system—except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a magazine, newspaper or on the Web—without permission in writing from the publisher.

      Nova Riley Publications

      Manhattan Beach, CA  90266

      www.AlliBaldocchi.com

      www.NovaRileyPublishing.com

      www.Velcro-Shoes.com

      ISBN 978-1-7342114-0-5 print book

      ISBN 978-1-7342114-1-2 e-book

      Cover photo: Liz Lonky, Life Iz Photography 

      Cover & Interior Design: Shannon Bodie, www.BookwiseDesign.com

      This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchase. Contact the publisher.

      A portion of the proceeds of this book will be donated to Autism Awareness.

      Publisher’s Cataloging-In-Publication Data

      (Prepared by The Donohue Group, Inc.)

      Names: Baldocchi, Alli, author.

      Title: Not broken : how my son with autism taught me to live / Alli Baldocchi.

      Description: Manhattan Beach, CA : Nova Riley Publishing, [2020] | Includes bibliographical references.

      Identifiers: ISBN 9781734211405 (print) | ISBN 9781734211412 (ebook)

      Subjects: LCSH: Baldocchi, Alli--Family. | Parents of autistic children--Psychology. | Autistic children--Care--Psychological aspects. | Self-actualization (Psychology) | Identity (Psychology)

      Classification: LCC HQ773.8 .B35 2020 (print) | LCC HQ773.8 (ebook) | DDC 649/.15--dc23

      Printed in the United States of America.

      Dedication

      This book is dedicated to my husband, Tome.

      Thank you for your unconditional love and support. Thank you for never questioning or second-guessing the decisions I make and trusting me wholeheartedly. Thank you for standing by me, and always cheering me on. Thank you for giving me the strength and courage to follow my heart and face my truths. Thank you for making me see what has always been. Thank you for being on this journey with me. Watching our boys explore the world and discover who they are and who they want to be, is my happiness. Sharing it with you is my everything.

      Contents

      Foreword

      Acknowledgments

      My Three Sons

      Introduction

      ONE: Mom Identity

      TWO: Dad Can Fix It

      THREE: It Takes a Village

      FOUR: A Gift of Empowerment

      FIVE: I Am Caden

      SIX: What’s the Deal with the Gut?

      SEVEN: Finding the Light

      EIGHT: Queen of the Castle

      NINE: Little Boy Wonder

      TEN: My Brother Caden

      ELEVEN: Caden for President

      TWELVE: I’m the Big Brother

      THIRTEEN: Turning Point

      FOURTEEN: Hope & Love

      Glossary

      Resources

      About the Author

      Foreword

      With the prevalence of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD; Autism) rising to one in fifty-nine according to a recent study conducted by the Centers for Disease Control, you are hard pressed to find someone who does not have a story. Colloquial terms such as ASD, Autism, or on the spectrum have evolved and are casually thrown around in everyday encounters. You often hear, I have a friend whose child has ASD, or I was watching a documentary on a child with Autism. It is even in our entertainment with movies such as Temple Grandin and television shows like Atypical . Although awareness of Autism is prevalent, understanding it has yet to be captured.

      My colleagues and I have a saying, If you’ve met one child with Autism, you’ve met one child with Autism. This is what drives most of us who have chosen this area of psychology to remain in this area. Children who are on the spectrum are a gift, an anomaly, but a gift nonetheless. Alli has done a masterful job capturing this in her book. It is an honest look at the beauty and challenges that children, parents, and families of kids with ASD all face.

      What I most appreciate is how Alli walks the reader through the very common stages of accepting what ASD means to her family. It’s a roadmap for other parents facing a similar journey. She starts by addressing the elephant in the room—what to do once you have a diagnosis, and how to process the ever-evolving feelings that accompany this new reality. Bold advice is offered throughout the book, like not always just accepting what a doctor or expert says, but rather empowering parents to find answers and solutions that feel true to their child and beliefs.

      Alli describes the many roadblocks she faced and continues to face as Caden grows up and his needs change. Like many parents, she tried the trends and fads and grasped for any intervention that showed potential to reduce the impact of interfering symptoms without losing her son. She shared the disappointment she experienced each time the latest attempt did not yield the results she had hoped for.

      By addressing her failed attempts, Alli normalizes this experience for other parents and encourages them to allow forgiveness of themselves and to continue the search for what is right for their child. She emphasizes the importance of mothers not only taking care of their Autistic child, but also finding ways to remain present for their other children and for themselves.

      Oftentimes, the focus is solely on the child who is on the spectrum. Alli tackles the issue of the family’s need to accept and cope with the diagnosis head on. She acknowledges the challenges she has faced with dividing her minimal time amongst all three of her children, each of whom comes with his own unique set of needs, as well as making time to be a wife and an individual person.

      Although awareness and acceptance are becoming more widespread, it takes those brave enough, like Alli, to share their unique story to help society understand the complexity and splendor of Autism. Her very real account of her own personal journey through stages of feeling broken to realize she, her family, and most important her son are not broken. The humor and hope she brings to a typically serious and dismal topic is refreshing.

      I have been fortunate to have a long-standing working relationship with Alli and her family. I have personally worked with each of her beautiful boys, and been touched by the wonder that is Caden. I still remember him sauntering into my office for the first time, wearing shorts and a T-shirt with a winter hat on. He made no apologies or excuses for who he was; yet I was gifted to experience his honesty, humor, and take on life. As a professional, I read this book and see the application of research and advances in medicine and treatment to a real life story. As a parent, one can read this book and see the community of others out there, like Alli, who share a similar story, one filled with ups and downs, but a beautiful tale of how to help themselves and others see that their Autistic child is not broken.

      Dr. Kaycie Deane is a psychologist in California. She earned her PhD from the University of California, Los Angeles, where she focused her graduate studies and research on the treatment of Autism Spectrum Disorder. During her training, she had access to leading researchers and groundbreaking research conducted through the UCLA Center for Autism Research and Treatment and collaborations with other universities. Since completing her doctorate, she has been in private practice, offering psychotherapy and assessments to diagnose Autism.

      Acknowledgments

      If I were to acknowledge everyone who has got me to where I am today, or supported me on this journey, I could write an entire second book. Every single person I have come in contact with has enriched my life in one way or another. There is no way to thank you all, but know that each one of you was in my heart as I wrote this book and shared the stories of my life.

      To my family, you have been my constant support system, there for me every single day and the reason I kept going every time I thought I couldn’t. I thank you.

      To my Mom friends, you know who you are. Without your endless support, nights out for drinks, laughter and tears, I would not be the same mom I am today. You have listened to me have my moments of complaining and have shared in so many triumphs, always cheerleading me every step of the way. I guess I should really thank our kids for bringing us together, and I thank you for sticking with me.

      To my Ride or Dies, the ones who are more like sisters, who call me out on my shit and don’t need a badge to know where they stand in my life. You know me better than most. During the times I need to be picked up off the floor, you are always there even when I tell you I’m OK. You see and love me for who I am, flaws and all, and will always support me in all my craziness.

      To my high school friends, my girls—Sweet Gals from ‘95—I love you. You know how much I cherish our friendships. Each one of you holds a special place in my heart. What an amazing thing we have. When we get together, it is like coming home, I can curl up on the couch and cry or dance as if no one is watching, and all of you would be right there with me.

      To my Soul Sisters and teachers, the ones who have helped guide me through this journey. You have shown me new paths and ways of seeing the world around me. You have taught me to let go of my control and really see myself for the amazing mom and person I am. You have taught me to acknowledge my struggles and embrace them, no longer allowing them to control me. And most important, you have shown me how strong I am and that there is beauty in being vulnerable.

      My new Mom friends at Renaissance—thank you for being in the thick of it with me and having daily conversations that are REAL.

      Velcro Shoes Moms: To all the moms and women who have allowed me to hold space for them, be the ear and shoulder they need while they have shared their stories with me, I am humbled and honored. Thank you for being so beautifully vulnerable and trusting me with your truths. You have all enriched my life more than you know and have allowed me to feel connected and not alone. We are in this together.

      All the old school 21st Street Crew who have always supported Tome. Dads struggle, too! You are always there with an early morning text or hundred, with check em’s or something that couldn’t wait

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1