From Three Heartbeats to One: A Gentle Companion Offering Hope in Grieving Pregnancy and Infant Loss
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About this ebook
Dear loss mom, acknowledging that your baby’s life has meaning and deserves to be honored will one day not feel as heavy as the forced separation of pregnancy and infant loss.
No anguish compares to the abrupt loss of a beloved baby. Unfortunately, countless families suffer in plain sight without effective support. Mourning
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Book preview
From Three Heartbeats to One - Keisha M. Wells
PRAISE FOR
FROM THREE HEARTBEATS TO ONE
Keisha Wells transforms her unimaginable experience of loss and grief into an irreplaceable tool for those who have also suffered the loss of a child. From Three Heartbeats to One is undeniably an exceptional resource. This book provides the love, understanding, and support needed for the thousands of families that face this devastating loss.
Shannon Pittman Duraso
Volunteer Leader for March of Dimes
Keisha is truly using her pain for purpose by sharing her loss story in From Three Heartbeats to One. Not only is she giving you practical tools but she is sharing real life examples of how to remove the shame and stigma associated with pregnancy and infant loss. I love the work Keisha is doing and know you will be blessed by her work.
Erica M. McAfee
Founder of Sisters in Loss
Keisha Wells takes readers on a candid journey through the healing process of grief and loss. Keisha compassionately removes the veil of doom and gloom, and shines light on the ability to still have a good life after tragedy in losing someone you love. The hope that exudes from the love that Kyle and Kendrick have deepened for Keisha, is one that we all can aspire to reach. Keisha provides useful tools to get unstuck and start on the journey of healing and finding a deeper purpose in life through loss. Keisha’s ability to allow herself to be vulnerable in her story of grief and loss in order to heal the soul of another is truly transcendent. I highly recommend this book whether you have experienced loss personally or if you want to help someone you love. Either way, one cannot walk away from reading this book and not be transformed.
Alexandra Samuel-Sturgess, LCSW
Founder of Spirited By Truth
Pregnancy and infant loss is a loss like none other. No one quite prepares you for a loss of this kind. No one quite understands the arduous journey of making meaning after such a loss. This is why the text scribed by the author equates to more than just a book. It is etched by a person who knows the road of pregnancy and infant loss. Keisha writes from a place of compassion, pain, and empathy that intertwines into a riveting text that you won’t want to put down. She provides a heartfelt, thoughtful, and compelling account of the varying experiences one encounters after a loss, while not categorizing everyone’s experiences. Additionally, there are practical strategies provided for coping with one’s feelings and creating meaning after loss.
This masterpiece is not only written for mothers. It is written for anyone who shares similar experiences or wants to support someone in loss. It is written for anyone who wants to learn about the unique experiences one goes through after a loss. It is written for you, the person who wants to feel validated, heard, seen, and transformed in your own unique way. To experience this metamorphosis in loss, please get your copy of From Three Heartbeats to One.
Dwayne White, LPC
As a grieving mother and the founder of the non-profit to support grieving mothers, Sunshine After the Storm, I have read a lot of books about grief. From Three Heartbeats to One is a unique book compared to the others that are out there. It doesn’t just talk about how we are grieving and sad, it gives us useful guidance and direction on how to move beyond the pain and sadness. I think it’s the best book for grieving mothers I have come across yet. Well done, Keisha. Thank you for taking your pain and creating a tool for other grieving mothers.
Alexa Bigwarfe
Author of Sunshine After the Storm:
A Survival Guide for the Grieving Mother
Copyright © 2019 by Keisha M. Wells
From Three Heartbeats to One is published by Evan Niles Press.
All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherwise—except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without prior permission in writing from the copyright owner.
While the author has made every attempt to provide accurate Internet addresses offered as citations and/or sources for further information at the time of publication, neither the author nor the publisher assumes any responsibility for errors or for changes that occur after publication.
The information provided in this book is the author’s opinion and not intended to be a definitive set of instructions. Reading the information provided does not constitute a therapeutic relationship with the author and is not a substitute for mental health or medical services. This book does not address every aspect of grief and loss. Some suggestions and exercises may not apply to readers’ specific needs. Please consult with a mental health or medical professional as warranted.
Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the King James Version of the Bible.
Scripture quotations marked MSG are from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
Cover Design by Michelle Fairbanks
Interior Design by Lauren Lynn
Editing by Yvonne I. Kanu
Author Photography by Derrick Reed
ISBN: 978-1-7340481-0-0 (paperback)
ISBN: 978-1-7340481-1-7 (ebook)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2019952308
Printed in the United States of America
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To my beloved Kyle Evan and Kendrick Niles.
My firstborn, my angels.
Because of you I’ve learned the core of love and now understand the place of loss and grief in life and living.
You’ve given me a great privilege—more than I could have ever given you—to support others beyond the stifling veil of grief.
Your sacrificial mission has been my greatest calling.
Until Eternity.
Sing, barren woman, who has never had a baby.
Fill the air with song, you who’ve never experienced childbirth!
You’re ending up with far more children than all those childbearing women. God says so!
Isaiah 54:1 (MSG)
Contents
Introduction
How to Use This Book
Extended Audience: Who This Book Is Also For
The Genesis of My Grief Journey
The Taunting Whys, Hows, And What-Ifs
PART I
In Feeling
Defining Your Emotions
Being Self-Aware
Identifying Dangerous Behaviors
Managing Trauma and Triggers
PART II
In Taking Care of Self: Mind, Body, and Spirit