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    The Gift of Compassion: A Guide to Helping Those Who Grieve
    The Gift of Compassion: A Guide to Helping Those Who Grieve
    The Gift of Compassion: A Guide to Helping Those Who Grieve
    Ebook81 pages1 hour

    The Gift of Compassion: A Guide to Helping Those Who Grieve

    By Rev Becca Stevens

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    About this ebook

    Unfortunately, grief and loss are inevitable parts of living. No one escapes. Even so, it's difficult to know how to console those who have reached a broken place in their lives. What is the best way to show compassion when words cannot be enough?

    In The Gift of Compassion, author Becca Stevens offers practical help for pastors, Stephen ministers, congregational caregivers, and other laity serving the broken-hearted. With a central message on the importance of simply being present for people who are grieving, Stevens combines practical how-to's with prayers, Scriptures, suggestions fro ways to serve the sacraments, and inspiration about the peace of God that passes all understanding.

    This small book outlines meaningful ways to show compassion through planning visits, writing notes, finding appropriate Scriptures and prayer to read, avoiding cliches, and offering the presence of God to people suffering through the dark and searching experience of grief.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherAbingdon Press
    Release dateNov 1, 2012
    ISBN9781426765483
    The Gift of Compassion: A Guide to Helping Those Who Grieve
    Author

    Rev Becca Stevens

    Becca Stevens books have grown out of her work as chaplain of St. Augustine's Chapel at Vanderbilt University, and as founder and director of Magdalene, a residential community for women with a criminal history of drug abuse and prostitution. Her work with Magdalene has earned national attention and spawned both a cottage industry, Thistle Farms, and related programs here and overseas. To date, she has raised nearly $13 million and gained nationwide press coverage for the organizations she supports. She has won numerous awards from organizations including the Frist Foundation and the Academy of Women in Achievement. She has been named the "Alumnus of the Year" by the School of Theology at the University of the South, "Nashvillian of the Year" by the Nashville Scene and "Tennessean of the Year" by The Tennessean. In October 2011, she was recognized as a "Champion of Change" by the Obama White House. She has written a number of articles, is a widely traveled speaker, and has both a

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      Book preview

      The Gift of Compassion - Rev Becca Stevens

      CHAPTER 1

      We Are Worthy to Love One Another

      But now thus says the LORD,

      he who created you, O Jacob,

      he who formed you, O Israel:

      Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

      I have called you by name, you are mine.

      When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;

      and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;

      when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,

      and the flame shall not consume you.

      For I am the LORD your God,

      the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

      I give Egypt as your ransom,

      Ethiopia and Seba in exchange for you.

      Because you are precious in my sight,

      and honored, and I love you,

      I give people in return for you,

      nations in exchange for your life.

      —Isaiah 43:1b-4a

      Prayer

      Gracious and Compassionate Lord, thank you for the gift of freedom to live fully in the light of your forgiveness. You teach me to love others as I love myself. Give me eyes this day to see myself as your holy child. Thank you for the gift of another day to love you again. Remind me of your gentle spirit and give me the strength to bear my cross this day. Remind me that every person is worthy and deserving of your healing and to uphold the dignity of every human being. Amen.

      Compassion: A Healing Tool

      We can have a compassionate ministry with a ready and loving heart when we remember our place and how we are called to love. There are a myriad of things that make it hard to be present and compassionate for people we are trying to care for. All caregivers carry stories about times when we have felt fearful, self-conscious, angry, rushed, or prideful, which caused us to not be able to be compassionate with people in crisis. Each of those stories teaches us what it means to be present and how grace carries us all through our ministries. The journey is always one of trial and much error, and none of those errors means that we are not worthy of the ministry. Those stories, in fact, lead us deeper into ministries and spaces that ground our faith. For me, all along this twenty-year road, I believe that learning to be compassionate is one of the great healing tools we can carry with us in our vocation. Compassion is a gift to be celebrated and a skill to be honed in the work of chaplaincy.

      Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is strong as death, passion fierce as the grave.

      —Song of Solomon 8:6

      Sixteen years ago I started a ministry called Magdalene that serves women with criminal histories of prostitution, addiction, and trafficking. We have six residential communities where the women live in community and a social enterprise called Thistle Farms that manufactures and sells all natural bath and body care products. The goal is to learn to live and work together and try to love one another without judgment. We strive to keep our focus on healing and mercy. When we worry too much about what others think about us, we trip over ourselves and become too self-conscious to notice the person right in front of us. There have been times when I was so worried or preoccupied that I tried to hide our failures or exaggerate our successes. Especially in the cases of relapse and death, I worried people would think I am incompetent, the program doesn’t work, or that we are not worthy of their time or consideration. Over and over the lessons people have preached, in their words and deeds to the community of Magdalene and to me, are that if I am honest and present, people will be kind and love generously. When there is brokenness, people will cry with

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