Much Ado About Nothing

MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING

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William Shakespeare

MASQUERADE PRESS

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Copyright © 2015 by William Shakespeare

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

Much Ado About Nothing

Characters of the Play

Act I

Scene I. Before Leonato’s house.

Scene II. A room in Leonato’s house.

Scene III. The same.

Act II

Scene I. A hall in Leonato’s house.

Scene II. The same.

Scene III. Leonato’s orchard.

Act III

Scene I. Leonato’s garden.

Scene II. A room in Leonato’s house

Scene III. A street.

Scene IV. Hero’s apartment.

Scene V. Another room in Leonato’s house.

Act IV

Scene I. A church.

Scene II. A prison.

Act V

Scene I. Before Leonato’s house.

Scene II. Leonato’s garden.

Scene III. A church.

Scene IV. A room in Leonato’s house.

Much Ado About Nothing

By

William Shakespeare

Much Ado About Nothing

Published by Masquerade Press

New York City, NY

First published 1612

Copyright © Masquerade Press, 2015

All rights reserved

Except in the United States of America, this book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

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MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING

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CHARACTERS OF THE PLAY

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Don Pedro, prince of Arragon.

Don John, his bastard brother.

Claudio, a young lord of Florence.

Benedick, a young lord of Padua.

Leonato, governor of Messina.

Antonio, his brother.

Balthasar, attendant on Don Pedro.

Conrade and Borachio, followers of Don John.

Friar Francis,

Dogberry, a constable.

Verges, a headborough.

A Sexton.

A Boy.

Hero, daughter to Leonato.

Beatrice, niece to Leonato.

Margaret and Ursula, gentlewomen attending on Hero.

Messengers, Watch, Attendants, &c.

Scene: Messina.

ACT I

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SCENE I. BEFORE LEONATO’S HOUSE.

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Enter Leonato, Hero, and Beatrice, with a Messenger

Leonato

I learn in this letter that Don Peter of Arragon comes this night to Messina.

Messenger

He is very near by this: he was not three leagues off when I left him.

Leonato

How many gentlemen have you lost in this action?

Messenger

But few of any sort, and none of name.

Leonato

A victory is twice itself when the achiever brings home full numbers. I find here that Don Peter hath bestowed much honour on a young Florentine called Claudio.

Messenger

Much deserved on his part and equally remembered by Don Pedro: he hath borne himself beyond the promise of his age, doing, in the figure of a lamb, the feats of a lion: he hath indeed better bettered expectation than you must expect of me to tell you how.

Leonato

He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much glad of it.

Messenger

I have already delivered him letters, and there appears much joy in him; even so much that joy could not show itself modest enough without a badge of bitterness.

Leonato

Did he break out into tears?

Messenger

In great measure.

Leonato

A kind overflow of kindness: there are no faces truer than those that are so washed. How much better is it to weep at joy than to joy at weeping!

Beatrice

I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the wars or no?

Messenger

I know none of that name, lady: there was none such in the army of any sort.

Leonato

What is he that you ask for, niece?

Hero

My cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua.

Messenger

O, he’s returned; and as pleasant as ever he was.

Beatrice

He set up his bills here in Messina and challenged Cupid at the flight; and my uncle’s fool, reading the challenge, subscribed for Cupid, and challenged him at the bird-bolt. I pray you, how many hath he killed and eaten in these wars? But how many hath he killed? for indeed I promised to eat all of his killing.

Leonato

Faith, niece, you tax Signior Benedick too much; but he’ll be meet with you, I doubt it not.

Messenger

He hath done good service, lady, in these wars.

Beatrice

You had musty victual, and he hath holp to eat it: he is a very valiant trencherman; he hath an excellent stomach.

Messenger

And a good soldier too, lady.

Beatrice

And a good soldier to a lady: but what is he to a lord?

Messenger

A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all honourable virtues.

Beatrice

It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man: but for the stuffing — well, we are all mortal.

Leonato

You must not, sir, mistake my niece. There is a kind of merry war betwixt Signior Benedick and her: they never meet but there’s a skirmish of wit between them.

Beatrice

Alas! he gets nothing by that. In our last conflict four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one: so that if he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let him bear it for a difference between himself and his horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left, to be known a reasonable creature. Who is his companion now? He hath every month a new sworn brother.

Messenger

Is’t possible?

Beatrice

Very easily possible: he wears his faith but as the fashion of his hat; it ever changes with the next block.

Messenger

I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books.

Beatrice

No; an he were, I would burn my study. But, I pray you, who is his companion? Is there no young squarer now that will make a voyage with him to the devil?

Messenger

He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio.

Beatrice

O Lord, he will hang upon him like a disease: he is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio! if he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere