Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    From $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Effete Fiction
    Effete Fiction
    Effete Fiction
    Ebook69 pages39 minutes

    Effete Fiction

    By D. E. Park

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Need a few tall tales to kill time while you're stuck at the airport or in a queue? Flash Fiction is the answer!

    Tiny tales suitable for a quick read on the bus, at the laundromat, or when the boss isn't looking. Pocket fiction for your phone, any time. Or just a quick shot of my favorite genres. All tales are between 40 and 500 words, wham bam, thank you ma'am. I can't recommend this approach for other aspects of your life, obviously.

    Here are even more (46 more!) tiny tales from D. E. Park in a variety of genres: Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror, and Other—Speculative Fiction.

    For example:
    The lost fortune hunt is on!
    An afterlife that isn't at all as expected.
    Our favorite wicked witch is cheered by the changing seasons.
    A delicious Italian dish, but is she pretty poison?
    No one expects the Robot Inquisition.
    A new import to the Greek Isles with a siren problem.
    Beverly Hills Drunken Divas.
    The first European monarch launching.

    And much more silliness.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherD. E. Park
    Release dateSep 3, 2015
    ISBN9781311353849
    Effete Fiction
    Author

    D. E. Park

    Dave is a vigilant champion against the magniloquent periphrastic battalions of blowhard, on the front lines daily protecting the virtues of brevity and whimsy. He's also demented and won't ever amount to anything.

    Read more from D. E. Park

    Related to Effete Fiction

    Related ebooks

    Fantasy For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • UNLIMITED

      Lost And Found

      Dec 5, 2021

      Lost And Found
      9 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Maybe It Won’t Be That Bad

      Dec 9, 2019

      Maybe It Won’t Be That Bad
      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      It’s About Altares

      Aug 17, 2021

      It’s About Altares
      7 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      La Otra Historia

      Jun 30, 2022

      La Otra Historia
      14 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      It Happened to Me…

      Jun 16, 2022

      A genuine miracle occurred at the art opening of the Blinky 40th Anniversary Exhibition at California State University Northridge Gallery in Southern California on 2 February 2019. An artwork by Erika Ostrander of the “Shroud of Blinky” was found wee

      6 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      ‘We've Gone On Holiday By Mistake’

      Jun 28, 2023

      Is there somethingyou really miss when you're away? For the last 38 years, I would say my wife [Joan Washington, who died in 2021, aged 74]. Do you travel light? My luggage got lost flying to New York 22 years ago, and I swore I would never ever trav

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The Naff British Way Of Death

      Dec 10, 2024

      When the funeral director tapped me on the shoulder, possessed of a guilty conscience I naturally thought I had done something wrong. So I flinched. Far from it, the tall, sepulchral fellow with a yellow-ochre waxwork complexion and straw for hair wa

      3 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The Eternal Adventure

      Jun 29, 2021

      The Eternal Adventure
      4 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Nancy Mitford, Queen of the Adriatic

      Mar 6, 2024

      In 1957, Gill Johnson, 25, left London for a Venetian palazzo to teach English to the children of the Brandolini family. One day, at the Venice Lido, she spotted a familiar figure… She seemed unattached and sitting in pointed isolation, as if the tid

      8 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Roger's PROFANISAURUS

      Nov 19, 2020

      Roger's PROFANISAURUS
      8 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Life In The past Lane

      Aug 27, 2021

      Life In The past Lane
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Table Talk

      Jun 1, 2023

      Table Talk
      11 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      A Year in Reading: Tim Lane

      Dec 8, 2021

      We stopped at the Topaz Internment Camp, where my wife’s family was held during World War II, near the tiny town of Delta, Utah. We found the apocalyptic remnants of one of our country’s great shames. The post A Year in Reading: Tim Lane appeared fi

      7 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Watch Your Step

      Nov 19, 2020

      Watch Your Step
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      SHORT STORY by MARGARET ATWOOD

      Mar 22, 2023

      SHORT STORY by MARGARET ATWOOD
      7 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      The Oyster Diaries

      Jun 18, 2024

      I know a certain amount about sports, mainly baseball. Last night the Rangers won the pennant, for example, and I know what the pennant is. The thing my husband finds truly poetic is sports. He’s always trying to talk to me about it and explain. “Wat

      23 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Speedboat

      Mar 24, 2022

      Nobody died that year. Nobody prospered. There were no births or marriages. Seventeen reverent satires were written – disrupting a cliché and, presumably, creating a genre. That was a dream, of course, but many of the most important things, I fi nd,

      14 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      SHORT STORY by MARGARET ATWOOD

      Mar 22, 2023

      SHORT STORY by MARGARET ATWOOD
      7 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Six Poems

      Feb 28, 2023

      Dear C, At first Virgil’s poem is quite dull; equivocalnames of products at The Container Store: Elfa White Medium Drawer, Mesh NarrowRolling Cart (Medium Solution), Narrow Classic Mesh Box and the number of pirouetting starseach product attained. An

      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      What's The Meaning Of Life? Ask Protomartyr

      Sep 29, 2017

      Protomartyr lead singer and lyricist Joe Casey walks us through some of the thorny questions behind the band's new album, Relatives In Decent, track by track.

      10 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Ladies’ Night

      Aug 15, 2023

      Ladies’ Night
      5 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Remembering Andy Pollitt

      Oct 2, 2023

      Remembering Andy Pollitt
      10 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Before You Melt Into The Sea

      Feb 3, 2022

      Before You Melt Into The Sea
      11 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Roger’S PROFANISAURUS

      Aug 4, 2022

      [email protected] air fryer 1. n. Device for making chips that won’t fur up your arteries. 2. n. A highcalorie food’s ghost exorcised from the premises of one who enjoys an unusually high-fat diet. Alan Sugar’s beard n. A straggly, threadbare f

      6 min read

    • UNLIMITED

      Walking On TheWild Side…

      Jul 17, 2023

      Walking On TheWild Side…
      3 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Effete Fiction

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Effete Fiction - D. E. Park

      Adventure Calling, Will You Accept the Charges?

      What do you think it is?

      Looks like a sign for some sort of restaurant.

      No way, it was hidden in the back of the family bible. It must have some kind of significance.

      Look, Lenny. You know Papa was always a little… Well, Ma always said he took too many jabs when he was a fighter.

      He was a squealer too, like, mobsters were after him and stuff.

      Sorry Lenny. I’ve heard the story about the Johnny Friendly trial more times than you and I’m sure Papa made it all up. Part of his Tough Guy image; the down-on-his-luck fighter stands up to the corrupt dock union boss. Papa told a lot of tales but I don’t think most of them were honest.

      Got a map? Where is this ‘Waterfront’ place?

      Town called Whitehaven, in Britain.

      Doesn’t sound mysterious.

      Maybe he liked the food there or something.

      Papa never went to England.

      Lenny played with the globe for a while, spinning it randomly, deep in thought.

      Hey, did this Johnny Friendly guy ever do jail time?

      Maw said he escaped on a private yacht with a ton of embezzled Union money.

      He’s still out there?

      Yacht was lost at sea.

      Was it lost in the Seychelles?

      Dunno, why?

      Danny, I think Papa knew exactly where the yacht with the money sank.

      And you think it was in the Seychelles? Why?

      The latitude and longitude on the restaurant sign in the photo, it’s a clue. If you flip the lat and long, you end up here. This point in the Seychelles, east of Kenya, about 40 km WNW of Bird Island. It’s on an oceanic ridge, not deep water.

      Does Bird Island have an airport?

      You know this is a longshot. Get two tickets.

      And Party Every Day

      Some religions said it was inevitable I’d find myself here. They didn’t get much else right.

      All of the descriptions of here vary wildly, of course. I never would have recognized the afterlife from any description I’d ever heard. For a few minutes, I didn’t even recognize where I was.

      I found myself in ordinary surroundings, the interior of a vaguely industrial-styled building. I’ve feel like I’ve been here before. Everything looks familiar: the echoing halls, lockers, and stairs. I can’t… This is my high school!

      The obvious first hypothesis arrived in a flash. It’s a dream. Why else would I be inside a building I last saw more than thirty years ago? There’s the trophy case, and the photo of the ‘79 Division Champions team with goofy-looking seventeen year old me in the second row.

      Which didn’t explain the surfacing memories of the ambulance, two EMT’s, the gurney, the searing pain… Oh, please no no, not another stroke.

      I rocked my forehead against the cool glass of the trophy case. Annie, I’m so sorry. Dwelling on the opportunities lost forever, feeling sorry for myself, feeling lost and confused and frightened. Swimming circles in an emotional whirlpool, for subjective centuries.

      Dave?

      She stood at the bottom of the stairs. She was wearing the ubiquitous Levis, red sweater, carrying schoolbooks, her blonde hair crimped in a style from the 70s. Déjà vu, I knew this face, once upon a time.

      "You don’t remember

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1