Enough Bull: How to Retire Well without the Stock Market, Mutual Funds, or Even an Investment Advisor

INTRODUCTION

We have just lived through a period of time that shifted the financial world on its axis. The old rules regarding personal finance are now history, as in obsolete.

This happened in the last quarter, the autumn, of 2008. Let’s call it The Fall of 2008.

THE FALL OF 2008

During this period, decades-old financial institutions simply disappeared. World stock markets tanked. Entire investment portfolios were devastated. Retirement dreams were wiped out. And it’s probably not going to get better soon.

What this series of events has done is show quite clearly the naked truth: traditional financial planning techniques don’t work. In fact, if we had done the opposite of what the experts have told us to do to get ahead financially, we would be far better off today. Here are some of the past theories and the new reality:

• Trust the stock market to make us wealthy? Never again.

• Pay our investment advisor a fee of more than 2% a year to try to beat the market? I don’t think so.

• Risk our home trying to make our mortgage tax deductible by investing in mutual funds? Please, give me a break.

• Maximize our RRSP contributions religiously each and every year . . . and also save 10% of our income above that. You must be kidding, right?

• Borrow to invest—leverage our way to riches? Forget it. Many have tried; you can now find most of them in the poor-house.

• Skip a cup of coffee to get rich automatically? Yeah, right.

I am not opposed to capitalism. We need efficient stock markets so that entrepreneurial people can grow businesses that flourish—businesses that create great products, deliver excellent services, hire good people, make profits and pay taxes.

The problem is that, obviously, markets have not been regulated satisfactorily. Businesses, especially financial ones in the United States, have been allowed to run rampant in the quest for riches. Thousands of intelligent, well-educated people making six-figure salaries and multi-million dollar bonuses spent years creating complex financial products that were sold to unsuspecting members of the public.

Ever heard of collateralized debt obligations? Mortgage-backed securities? Non-bank asset-backed commercial paper? What about income trusts? Or even mutual funds?

These complex instruments made many people rich. The people that invented them. The people that re-packaged them. And the people that sold them.

Unfortunately, the vast majority of people that bought into them got screwed. There’s the homeowner with no job and no money who was convinced to take out a mortgage on his home and ended up losing it. There’s the government, and you and me as the taxpayers, forced to shell out billions of dollars to buy into financial houses-of-cards just to keep them afloat. And of course, there’s anyone who holds investments in these worthless companies.

ANGRY YET?

I am, and that’s why I wrote this book. To give you hope. To show you that there is a way to get ahead financially. And you don’t have to be a genius or trust a financial expert to get you there.

I’m going to show you how you can do it with a guarantee that in the future your investments will never decline. I can say that because we won’t be using the stock market. We won’t even be using mutual funds. It is so easy to follow you won’t even need to think about it for more than a few hours a year. It is so simple that once implemented you won’t even need an investment advisor.

It’s the plan laid out in this book that you can read in less than one day. After you read this book you’ll be able to explain it fully in five minutes.

WHY I WROTE THIS BOOK

I wrote it because I have received a lot of e-mails like this:

Good morning, David. I have just finished reading your book Smoke and Mirrors: Financial Myths That Will Ruin Your Retirement Dreams and I couldn’t agree with you more. I am, however, concerned about my daughter and son-in-law who have this mantra that everything goes into the RRSP. I need to educate them and your line of thinking is what I need to approach them with.

While my children are quite well off, I am scraping by—having lost most of my portfolio in the recent stock market crash while my husband was going through a major cancer operation and my portfolio was not on my mind and, sad to say, nor on my broker’s mind. The good thing is hubby survived, but our belts are very tight as a result of looking the other way for even a few days.

Joanne

This e-mail arrived in January of 2005. The stock market crash she was talking about was the crash of March of 2000. In 2008 I started to hear more such stories.

YOUR RETIREMENT JOURNEY

But does the whole idea of financial planning need to be so complex? If you listen to all the experts, you’ll often end up confused. You may be thinking:

• My investment advisor is telling me I have to invest more but my existing savings have just gotten whacked in the market. Isn’t that like throwing good money after bad?

• Getting my finances in order is going to be painful. Forget it. I want to live now!

• This is all so depressing. I never seem to be making much progress.

• All the standard retirement advice says that I’m on the wrong track. Jeez, my unused RRSP room is huge!

• Personal finances are very complex; I can never get a good handle on what is going on with my money even after talking to my broker.

• I may never be able to afford to retire!

You know what? It doesn’t have to be confusing or complicated. It never used to be. Things like mutual funds, RRSPs and even capital gains tax did not even exist before the seventies. The truth is that the whole subject of personal finance has been made complicated because it makes money for the people that run the financial system. It is designed to be complex so that these financial types can continue to earn six-figure salaries—off the hard-earned savings of the little guy and gal.

Let’s make an analogy, shall we? They want us to believe that the typical journey to retirement is like a trip down a river. A river is the best way to get there—walking is too slow. It’s a complicated journey, so you’ll obviously need a guide, right?

Down the River

We arrive at our advisor’s headquarters to learn about the trip we are about to take.

Welcome friends, you’ve come to the right place! We have been in business for more than twenty years and we know rivers like the back of our hands. Trust us—we’ll get you to your destination safely.

The advisor goes on to describe the trip.

Rivers are different and you never really know what to expect. We have accompanied our clients on thousands of river trips. We know what to expect! We know how to guide you through rough waters. Don’t worry—let our experience be your guide!

Now step into the next office, where we’ll teach you all about what you’re likely to see and experience during the journey.

So you step through the door and are asked to sign the Know Your Client form. This form is necessary for the advisor. It proves you OK’d some level of risk taking. If you read the fine print, you’ll see that the onus is on you to protect yourself.

Now, in this case, the advisor doesn’t know which river you’re going to be travelling down. If he has had little experience, he may have only travelled down easy flowing rivers with nice scenery.

The more experienced advisors know that most trips are never soothing for long. They know the trip may be anything but.

If they were forced into full disclosure, they’d have to warn you of the truth:

Most retirement journeys using the stock market are like a journey down the river—the Niagara River!

Uh-Oh, It’s the Niagara River

Here’s what you should know before you begin the journey. According to Niagara Parks, an agency of the Government of Ontario, the Niagara River is 58 kilometres long, beginning in Lake Erie and ending in Lake Ontario. The elevation between the lakes is about 99 metres (326 feet). About half of that elevation change occurs at one spot—Niagara Falls.

At Grand Island, the river divides into the west channel, known as the Canadian or Chippawa Channel, and the east channel, known as the American or Tonawanda Channel.

The Canadian Horseshoe Falls drops an average of 57 metres (188 feet) while the American Falls ranges from 21 to 34 metres (70 to 110 feet). The American measurement is taken from the top of the falls to the top of the rock pile at the base, called the Talus Slope. The height of the American Falls from the top of the falls to the river below the rocks is the same as the Canadian Horseshoe Falls.

Sections of the river move quite slowly, but the speed of the water in the rapids just above the falls reaches 40 kilometres per hour (25 miles per hour). Speeds of over 100 kilometres per hour (60 miles per hour) have been recorded at the falls themselves. At the Whirlpool Rapids below the falls, water travels at about 50 kilometres per hour (30 miles per hour).

The great volume of water going over the falls is forced into a narrow gorge called the Great Gorge, where the Whirlpool Rapids are formed. The water surface here drops 15 metres (50 feet) and the water speeds reach 9 metres per second (30 feet per second). The whirlpool is a basin formed where the river takes a sharp right turn. The actual whirlpool is created by the reversal phenomenon. Here, the water travels over the rapids and enters the pool, then travels counterclockwise past the natural outlet. When the exiting water tries to cut across itself to reach the outlet, pressure builds up and forces the water under the incoming stream. The swirling waters create a vortex or whirlpool.

Beyond the whirlpool is another set of rapids that drops approximately 12 metres (40 feet).

Are you ready? your advisor then asks. Let’s jump into the boat then, shall we?

Assume your journey to retirement is the 58-kilometre stretch from Lake Erie to Lake Ontario along the Niagara River. It would be an exciting trip, wouldn’t it? Some parts would be calm and slow, others bumpy and very fast. There would be smooth sections and jaw-dropping plunges. There would be parts where you’d feel like you were going nowhere—spinning in circles. There’d possibly even be some rocky sections. Doesn’t that sound a lot like the typical trip to retirement using the stock market?

Retirement Journey: Plan B

But is a trip down Niagara the only way to get to Lake Ontario? In personal finance terms, is trusting the stock market to carry our retirement nest egg to our destination the best way to go?

I don’t think so. Personally, I’d rather avoid the jaw-dropping plunges. Decisions like whether to go over the Canadian Falls, or the smaller American Falls with the rock slope at the bottom, are decisions I don’t care to make!

I also don’t like the idea of spinning around a whirlpool at a hundred kilometres an hour hoping I don’t drown. And I’d prefer a smooth ride to one that might throw me out of the boat.

Here’s What They Don’t Want You to Know

Well, here’s what they don’t want you to know: you don’t need to use the Niagara River. You don’t need the stock market or mutual funds. You don’t need to risk your financial life by going over spectacular plunges or stagnating for endless periods of time going around in circles hoping you won’t drown in the process.

You can take the guaranteed route—the safe road—and this book will show you how.

PART ONE:

THE ANTIDOTE

THE ANTIDOTE: A SIX-POINT PLAN FOR FINANCIAL FREEDOM

The Antidote is a simple plan. It’ll only take you a few minutes to read the six-point synopsis below.

But here is the best thing about it: You don’t need to follow it in order. You don’t even need to religiously follow each one of the six points. The fact of the matter is that even if you stick to just one of the points, you’ll probably make a significant improvement in your personal finances.

Follow it and you can rest easy knowing that your retirement nest egg will never decline, even if your bank does.

Here we go.

1.Avoid Personal Financial Disasters

• Never touch anything that cannot be explained simply to you in plain English.

• Don’t invest in anything that is not guaranteed by the government.

• Never borrow to invest.

• Avoid complicated investment schemes. If it sounds too good to be true, it is.

2.You Don’t Need the Stock Market or Mutual Funds

• The truth is that you don’t need to risk your hard-earned money in the stock market and you don’t need mutual funds.

• You can use 100% government-guaranteed investment certificates to achieve your goals without the risk of losing your shirt.

• If you want to take a chance, buy a lottery ticket.

3.Buy a Home and Pay Off the Mortgage

• Decide if you can afford a house and, if you can, buy one.

• Do the calculation of how many years it will take to pay off the mortgage and do it.

• Never risk your home for any kind of investment idea, no matter what.

4.Reducing Expenses Doesn’t Have to Be Painful

• Focus on two of your biggest expenses—income taxes and interest on your debt.

• Pay to have your family’s personal income tax returns prepared by a qualified expert.

• Pay extra to have that expert analyze your family situation to maximize savings by income splitting, restructuring to make sure as much debt as possible is tax-deductible.

• Find out what your credit rating is and improve it.

• Get at least three quotes on any debt that you get into.

5.Forget RRSPs Until Your Debt Is Paid Off (the Opportunity Zone)

• Do not even think about saving for retirement until you have paid off student loans and bought a home.

• Pay off your mortgage before investing another dime in an RRSP.

• Never borrow to invest in an RRSP.

6.Ask Yourself if You Really Need an Investment Advisor

• If you’ve got a bad one, find a good one.

• If you can’t find a good one, simplify your finances so you don’t need one at all.

1

AVOID PERSONAL FINANCIAL DISASTERS

In the mid-eighties I took one of those personality tests that determine what type of person you are, what your strengths and weaknesses are and what type of career you’d be suited for. The results were not too surprising: I was basically a pretty normal person, good at math, probably never going to be a great artist or preacher.

But then, at the end of the session, the person giving me the results told me something that has turned out to be one of the most important pieces of information that I have ever received in my life. It was this:

Dave, you can’t tell