Expanded Orgasm: Soar to Ecstasy at Your Lover's Every Touch

Author

Copyright © 2002 by Patricia Taylor

Cover and internal design © 2002 by Sourcebooks, Inc. Cover image © Corbis

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems—except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its publisher, Sourcebooks, Inc.

Disclaimer: This book is not intended as a substitute for medical advice from a qualified physician. The intent of this book is to provide accurate general information in regard to the subject matter covered. If medical advice or other expert help is needed, the services of an appropriate medical professional should be sought.

Published by Sourcebooks, Inc.

P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410

(630) 961-3900

FAX: (630) 961-2168

www.sourcebooks.com

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Taylor, Patricia, 1953–

Expanded orgasm: soar to ecstasy at your lover's every touch / by Patricia Taylor.

p. cm.

ISBN 1-57071-831-8 (alk. paper)

1. Sex instruction for women. 2. Orgasm. 3. Female orgasm. 4. Sexual excitement. I. Title.

HQ46.T245 2001 613.9'6—dc21

2001032244

To Allen: may our passion ever grow

Acknowledgments

I have long held a vision near and dear to my heart that women and men everywhere can begin to share in some of the exquisite joys and pleasure we have been fortunate enough to bring into our own lives. I thank all those who have supported me in helping make this vision a reality.

   With deep appreciation I want to acknowledge in particular some of the people who have helped me bring my vision to fruition.

   First and foremost, I thank my loving husband and partner of sixteen years, Allen. From the beginning, Allen has let me know that giving me pleasure is one of his greatest joys in life. He has taught me to value my own wants and desires. Allen's passion, joy for life, and commitment to expanded orgasm has infused me with a lifelong foundation of security, joy, and pleasure. It has been a joy to connect, play, and teach with him.

   Next, I thank Jim Heynemann for our many years of friendship and success in working together. His gifts as a brilliant teacher are priceless and evident to all who know him. I am deeply grateful for the privilege of knowing Jim and working with him.

   I thank my dear friend and teacher Lori Star for all she has taught me about Tantra. To this day, Lori inspires me to progress ever forward, through her own teaching, her love, her encouragement, and her friendship. I also thank Celebrations of Love, in Marin County, California. This community continues to nurture my soul deeply.

   Thank you Victor Baranco and the many gifted teachers at More University for the incredible quality and quantity of information you have developed and shared on extended orgasm, relationship, community, communication, and pleasure. My life has been deeply and permanently transformed as a result of studying with you and meeting so many people in this wonderful community.

   Thank you Bill Lamond for taking such a stand for turn-on and pleasure

    I thank Osho for his everpresent words of inspiration on Tantra and other great religious traditions of the world. Thank you for opening my mind up even further to the great power of spirituality and the variety of ways in which this precious energy can be experienced and enjoyed.

   I thank Stan Dale and the Institute for Human Awareness for your information and your community. You have been instrumental in opening me up to the riches of intimacy and the beauty and power of win-win relating, in, as they say, a world in which everyone wins.

   I thank all my friends and clients who have taught me more than I can ever fully acknowledge here. Know that you live in my heart and that you teach me just as much as I could ever teach in return.

   Finally, I thank my agent, Carolyn Grayson, for believing in this project when it was little more than a query letter; and my editor, Deb Werksman, for seeing the potential in this book from the start. Her vision for the potential of this book, plus enthusiastic encouragement and skillful editing, has played an essential role in bringing this book into print.

Introduction

Knowing I can expand gives me a tremendous feeling of power and calm.

This experience makes me look and feel younger.

   It's like a kaleidoscope of delicious feelings, thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations.

   I feel refreshed, renewed, even reborn afterward.

   This practice has immensely increased my sense of well-being and self-worth.

   Men who never noticed me before now find me intoxicating. They can just sense how orgasmic I am, without my saying a word or acting any particular way.

   What if there was something you could do that would reliably and dramatically increase your sense of well-being, give you great pleasure, improve how you feel about yourself and about life, and practically guarantee a great relationship? And suppose it was legal, free, and readily available?

   What would you do to seek out this something? Would it be worth hunting it down? Taking the time to learn how to use it? Getting those you love to share it with you?

   This book is for those who want their lives to be filled with these benefits—and many more. The something that yields these benefits is an experience called expanded orgasm. Building upon—and far beyond—regular orgasm, expanded orgasm is practiced by a surprising number of women and men who are finding deep fulfillment in it.

   Orgasm is not an easy subject to talk about. To discuss a dramatically enhanced kind of orgasm presents new challenges. In order to make it easy for you to understand—and achieve—the benefits of expanded orgasm, I've employed stories about the practices and results of women and men who engage in it frequently. More important, you will follow two couples—Sam our couples coaching. You will see how each couple learned to achieve great benefits for themselves and in their relationships.

   This book will help you understand what this remarkable experience is and how it is different from regular orgasm. You'll explore your own motivations and readiness to learn to expand. As you read about each lesson, you'll learn how to achieve and enjoy expanded orgasm step by step. I assume you are working with a partner with whom you have a basically good relationship. However, much can be learned on your own, especially in the first four lessons. Don't let the lack of a willing partner dissuade you from such a pleasurable path! Let's get started!

Orgasms: Can We Talk?

Orgasm. The very word evokes deep emotions. What energetic crosscurrents do you feel just saying the word?

   You've been told that your orgasms are important. Conversely, you've been told that they are unimportant and that you should go for the emotional connection. You've compared yours with others—well, with what others told you,—with descriptions in sex manuals, and with benchmarks promoted by magazines (don't tell me you haven't!). What a lot of fuss over eight to twelve muscular contractions, eight-tenths of a second apart.

   If you've been unfavorably comparing your orgasms with some ideal, you may have been taking this exquisitely pleasurable, sublime experience and turning it into yet another reason to beat yourself up, or another reason for performance anxiety?

   I'm here to tell you there is another way. What if we've simply been asking the wrong questions about orgasm? What if there is another realm of orgasmic experience available, in which the pleasure is far greater, in which the orgasmic feeling is spread all over your body, rather than just localized in your genitals? What if you could have this powerful, all-over feeling for as long as you desired? What if this orgasmic state could have beneficial effects on your mind, your emotions, your intimate relationships—in short, on the rest of your life?

   And what if this wellspring of orgasmic bliss was available to you—not after years of arduous study, but after consistently applying a few simple principles and practices? This all-over, whole-body, extended-in-time kind of orgasm is expanded orgasm.

What Is Expanded Orgasm?

It may surprise you to discover that there is more than one kind of orgasm. (We'll explore the typology of orgasm in detail later on). You are probably most familiar with regular or climactic orgasm. In fact, climax is often used as a synonym for orgasm. However, in addition to the orgasm you think of when you have a climax during sex (alone or with a partner) there is something more available. The climax-type orgasmic response evolved as part of the dance of procreation. You will learn that orgasm can be extended well past the limits that serve that biological function.

   Expanded orgasm is a compelling, accessible process that anyone can use to enter a state of pleasurable expansion and flow. It is also a name for the orgasmic state people enter using this process. Here are some of the benefits they report. Expanded orgasm:

• feels surprisingly good.

• promotes partners to feeling better about themselves.

• revitalizes their relationships, in and out of the bedroom.

• creates a state of youthfulness in thinking, feeling, and appearance.

• offers practitioners health benefits such as stress reduction (stress can be linked to a variety of health problems) and general body toning. This is a type of orgasm that is even more powerful and intense than regular orgasm. In one sense, it's orgasm expanded in both time and space. It lasts longer, and is felt more widely throughout the receiver's body. It is usually experienced not only physically, but in the emotional realm as well. During the experience, body and mind no longer feel separate, but part of a larger self.

   Expanded orgasm can't be compared to the kinds of orgasmic experiences described in most sex instruction books. Frequently, these manuals focus on how couples can psyche themselves into feeling more sexual desire using techniques such as fantasy, deep breathing, and sensate focus (wherein the receiving partner excludes thinking about the giving partner while enjoying pure sensation). This information can do more harm than good when it directs people away from the most reliable source of true turn-on—intimate attention that is at once physical, mental, and emotional. Which would you rather have—psyched-up excitement or the profound experience of physical, mental, and emotional connection with a partner who is giving you full, intimate attention?

   While some people have engaged in expanded orgasm spontaneously or via secret teachings, it's a whole new world for most of us. Just like regular orgasm, information about expanded orgasm may have been repressed or simply undiscovered and unexplored through history because society feared the negative repercussions that open, expanded orgasmic sensuality might bring forth. It is time to challenge that assumption.

   Both men and women are equally capable of experiencing expanded orgasm. While this book focuses primarily on women (and how they and their partners can create it), the exercises are applicable and rewarding to both men and women in a relationship.

   Expanded orgasm can be learned on your own. We encourage single men and women to learn these skills on their own. However, most people find that the practice and the experience are made even more powerful when in a relationship. And, key attitudes and skills like communication and partnership are important in developing your ability to enjoy this new expanded sensation.

Women's Changing Attitudes

Attitudes about women's orgasm have done a complete about-face in a generation. When once orgasms were seldom discussed in public, it is now a suitable topic of conversation. When once a woman could plead ignorance and propriety as acceptable excuses for not knowing how her own orgasmic body functioned, she is now expected not only to be familiar with her genital geography, but also to claim and master her orgasmic expression.

   Women can give themselves orgasms or receive them from a partner. In both situations, they link their orgasms with the broader activity of sex.

   What is sex, if not a deeply intimate form of communication and selfexpression? Orgasm is but one aspect of sex. It is not necessarily the most important. But orgasm does play a special role: it is a defining moment in sex, one in which the person having the orgasm experiences a singular symphony of events. Hormones course through the body, the nervous system becomes highly aroused, and pleasure washes rapidly through body and mind. I think of this series of events as the little o.

   Other times, if we're savvy or lucky, we catch a ride on the orgasmic wave. Progressively more intense feelings spread through the genitals, pelvis, abdomen, chest, face; radiate out through hands and feet. The river of sensation melts our cares away, so that our being fills with love for ourselves, our partners, and our world. Our breathing alters, our sense of time expands. We climax. Was that one minute, or ten, that we spent going over the edge? Our capacity for feeling itself expands and we find ourselves in wonderment. Was that another orgasm? Am I losing count? Who cares? And this I think of as the big O.

   Some women are pre-orgasmic. They have yet to feel their first orgasm. The word pre-orgasmic has thankfully replaced the word frigid. It leaves room for the hope that someday, maybe soon, a pre-orgasmic woman will find her way into the club of the orgasmic. This hope is well founded; most pre-orgasmic women can learn they have an orgasmic capacity that simply hasn't yet been awakened.

   Most women I know have a range of experiences with orgasm. At times they are as hot as a smoking pistol, and at other times, can barely feel a thing, despite all the right factors (great partner, great mood, desire).

   When things go right, and that big O just keeps rolling in, is there any need to ask ourselves what we are doing right? We feel expert, as demonstrated by the outcome. It is only when the big O fails to materialize, or even more disturbing, when the little o is smaller than we hoped (if it comes at all), that suddenly our doubts motivate us to understand, and hopefully reverse, the situation.

   This is the moment when most women will ask not what has happened to my orgasmic capabilities? but, what has happened to my sex life? And, in some ways, this is a most reasonable question. Our experiences with sex take place on the emotional, mental, and even spiritual—as well as physical—level. To analyze any of the component parts is like trying to determine where the fire in a diamond is coming from by peering through one facet alone. Is this the right facet to be peering through right now? What if all of the facets together create the fire? Then does it ever make sense to regard the fire through one portal alone?

   It turns out to be useful to approach understanding our orgasms from both directions. To uncover clues to enhancing our orgasmic (and sex) life, it makes sense to focus on both the big picture and the details.

   What questions do you ask when tonight's encounter with your pleasure center has fizzled? More seriously, suppose its has been a while since you felt anything to make you sing? You wonder what caused your experience to fall far short of its potential? Was it me, was it him, or was it our relationship that somehow failed to perform?

More specifically, we ponder:

How can I feel as much as I know it is possible to feel?

What must I do to stay interested in sex with my partner?

How can I get my partner even more interested in having sex with me?

Are my hormone levels adequate to support a rewarding sex life?

How often do I need to have sex in order to stay in good sexual condition?

Why does my desire for sex fluctuate so much?

To what extent is my partner responsible for my pleasure during sex?

   You can ask these questions both at the big picture level and at the specific level. A consistent practice of exploring expanded orgasm will expand the number, variety—and usefulness—of your questions about your orgasmic response, your sex life, your relationships—in fact, your whole life. It will also vastly increase the number of answers.

   These are excellent questions for women to ask. If you wait until things go poorly to start asking, then you've waited too long. If you'll start addressing these questions now, you can begin a lifelong learning and feedback process.

My Personal Path

It may appear that I've been an orgasmic diva my entire life, but nothing could be further from the truth. I still envy women who ooze with a remarkable inborn sensuality. For me, becoming and staying orgasmic has been a path of consistent, pleasurable discipline—and a little good fortune (don't worry—finding this book will be enough good fortune to get you started).

   My orgasmic life opened at age eighteen. My older, more experienced boyfriend touched me there and I immediately yanked his hand away. The sensation frightened me. I assumed I was too oversensitive to be orgasmic. Based on this conclusion, I didn't pursue orgasm directly for the next ten years, despite having a succession of willing applicants and an otherwise healthy sex life. If you asked me, I would have told you how happy I was with my sex life, and how content I was with the extent of my knowledge. I never bought a vibrator, read steamy novels, or hoped for anything more than a satisfying sexual encounter, surrounded by plenty of loving and cuddling and touching.

   Over time, my appreciation grew for what I learned to regard as twangs of pleasure. Within ten years of my first orgasm, I was ready to accept a certain amount of sensation without complaint. By age thirty, the idea of improving the quality of my twang lurked ominously in the background of my sexual encounters. Unfortunately, I seemed to have developed lockjaw every time I had sex. My inner world bristled with commentary: Move your finger to the left, please. Could you go a little slower? Oooh, that felt good, why don't you stay there a bit longer? What's the rush?

   But I was paralyzed by the belief that merely to utter such directives would be to slam my partner's ego into a hard brick wall. After all, wasn't he trying his very best? And then there was the issue of politeness. How rude it would seem to imply that his offerings were less than delightful! I was raised to be a lady, and ladies didn't act like demanding tramps. If I were to reveal how much I liked what he did, that might cheapen me. And so my inner dialog continued. How shall I fake my orgasm today? I searched for that Goldilocks orgasm, not too big, not too little, but just good enough so that he would still respect me in the morning.

   Finally the noise inside my head was so intense I couldn't live with myself another day. My success in the rest of my life was too greatly at odds with my bedroom lockjaw, and I resolved to right the situation. Incapable of saying anything in the heat of the moment, I waited until we were suitably elsewhere. We went out to eat the next night and I made sure we both ordered wine. Then I pulled out a book on sexual technique. The author advised couples to talk frankly about their needs, hopes, and desires in the bedroom. I showed him a particularly rousing passage encouraging such communication, and asked his opinion, remaining as ladylike as ever. Did he agree with such a modern approach to sex?

   As he read the paragraph, he said, Is there something you would like to tell me about how I touch you? Through my haze of embarrassment, I admitted that I occasionally wanted him to touch me in different ways. He thanked me enthusiastically, and begged me to communicate from that point forward. He scored big points with me that night. Still, I never brought the subject up again, and most of my sexual lockjaw persisted.

   Five years later, I was dating a new man. He wanted to practice something known as extended orgasm. He even brought a book with him on our second date. He read it like a man, from cover to cover, taking notes, underlining key principles, and setting up practice sessions. I read it with much less diligence. In an hour, I'd skimmed through this big, fat tome on techniques. I then followed my partner's lead in exploration, enjoying his new attention more than his new techniques.

   The book promised that extended orgasms could lead to one-hour orgasms. If a one-minute orgasm seemed immense, an hour-long orgasm seemed truly incomprehensible. My own orgasms lasted about ten seconds. I had (thank heaven) gotten far past the point of pushing a man's hand away as soon as the sensations felt too good. But it still took twenty minutes to lead up to the little o, while my partner hunted, pecked, and rubbed me every which way. Despite his studious book learning, the end results bespoke a certain lack of real mastery. By the time I was ready to go over the edge, my attention span was gone. I felt sore and disinterested. I was grateful when the orgasm appeared—that was my permission to stop. As ever, my lips were sealed. He never knew that I wasn't having the time of my life.

   Three years later, we became involved with Tantra, a practice of energy movement and ecstatic sexuality, where we had the opportunity to get our first real experience of expanded orgasm. Suddenly the world of orgasm exploded. With training, my partner learned how to give me powerful extended and expanded orgasms unlike anything I had ever known before. With my first expanded orgasm, a hot, white light electrified my entire body in a continual stream, and I remained in that state effortlessly. I had been completely unprepared for anything ever to feel that good. And when my partner was done giving me this pleasure, I looked at him as a woman newly in love. Right then, I dedicated my life to learning as much as I possibly could about an experience that had touched me so powerfully and deeply, and which had allowed me to connect with my partner in ways I had never imagined.

   As I progressed in my studies, I found many other women who had had experiences with orgasm similar to mine. They and their partners were frustrated by the lack of good information. They were eager to learn more, and discovering that book learning wasn't giving them what they needed. Our eager interest and explorations attracted people to us who wanted to jump-start their own expanded orgasm programs. Most significantly, there was a juice, a joy, and a special glow in our connection, and everyone who met us could see it. That is what they wanted.

   I trained by locating every eclectic source of information I could find. While my partner trained as a giver, I trained as a receiver. I began to enlarge my own orgasmic capacity through masturbation. I learned how to talk with my partner. Importantly, I began to recognize the extent of my power to create the experience of expanded orgasm. Eventually, I learned how to become an excellent giver of expanded orgasm as well as receiver, greatly to my partner's delight.

   I have come a very long way. Today, I can go into orgasmic states at will, just by thinking about them. I can enter and remain in expanded orgasm for hours. But I developed this ability over time. My partner and I had to scour the sexual literature and learn from a wide variety of teachers (with dramatically varying abilities). We progressed as we stumbled through trial and error. If you follow the path outlined in this book, you will streamline your learning process significantly.

   Today, I enter expanded orgasm at least five times a week. Sometimes I engage in it to keep my youth eternal, to have reasons to sing, to share energy with the stars, and to feel as if I am in love every day of my life. And sometimes, I do it just because it's two o'clock, and if I don't, I will never have this unique two o'clock chance again. Sometimes I use expanded orgasm to celebrate something special with my partner—a birthday, an anniversary, or an especially beautiful night. Increasingly, I access expanded orgasm to enhance my sense of pleasure in what used to be routine moments. Finally, I often do it just because it is my practice and it feels wonderful. I know instinctively that each time I thoroughly immerse myself in the vibrational awakening of my whole body, I grow younger and happier and more vital.

   My ongoing, always growing practice has been a continual source of joyful learning and discovery. I have come to appreciate how much of our sexual pleasure is based on physical skills, and how very much lies in the non-physical domains of mind, heart, and spirit.

   Expanded orgasm has given me a leg up on pleasure. I am far more ready to have pleasure, or at least consider having pleasure, in all areas of my life. And yet, I must confront the same issues as every other woman who wants to keep a lifelong relationship vital and juicy and authentic. I have found that the practice of expanded orgasm is not a panacea that will answer all my questions about love, turn-on, sex, orgasm, and pleasure. In fact, I ask more questions than ever. My orgasmic capacities serve as a barometer to how well I am doing with the rest of my life. This barometer has guided me often into returning to pleasure when I have been lost. Today, with the fresh passion and anticipation of a teenager, I eagerly anticipate the many years of learning and growth that still lie before me. Expanded orgasm is a path for life.

Our Coaching Practice

Our personal path to orgasmic pleasure led to an interesting development. Given our rather unique training in expanded and extended orgasm, friends and acquaintances who knew of our pursuits began sharing with us that they, too, had been facing some of the same challenges and rewards that we had experienced. Some had been given little or no information about how to pleasure themselves or their partners before partnering up. As a result, they were shy, afraid to communicate, or lonely, simply because they didn't know what to say or do. A few lessons invariably opened up whole new avenues of pleasurable relating; all that was needed was the information.

   Others we knew had made significant progress toward expanded orgasm on their own, and yet were eager to add more information to the already rewarding progress they had made. We found our style and method of teaching worked well for those who didn't want therapy, but rather new ideas and techniques that would increase the depth and fun of relating together intimately.

   Over time my partner Allen and I joined forces with others to teach workshops and private sessions to individuals and couples wanting more information, and as such, we became coaches in this art.

   Today I work with various teaching partners in a variety of settings, with individuals and couples who seek to enhance their sensual identities and relationships. We work with people from all over the country and in all walks of life. Some people prefer going to a class or workshop, where they can see and hear ideas to take home and try in private. And yet there is also a demand for private sessions, in which we work couple-to-couple and delve more specifically into the optimal course of learning. We observe what they are feeling, reposition them, open up their personal dialog, and get them started. Our goal is always to train partners how to train each other.

   We know that no matter how good our teaching is, each client is always the final expert on what he or she wants and likes the most in every moment. Once we open up that dialog between couples and get them started powerfully down the road to giving and receiving exquisite orgasmic pleasure, we know we have done our job well. They now have the tools they need to develop and maintain a lifelong practice of expanded orgasm.

Who Learns Expanded Orgasm?

Most couples have a honeymoon period in which everything they say and do works like magic on their partner. A velvety touch, a furtive kiss, or a finger tracing a squiggle down an arm is enough to send a lover into paroxysms of rhapsody. During this honeymoon period, sex happens in a state of grace. The juices start flowing before the clothes are off. Like two halves of a pair of gloves, two lovers cleave together as a part of a greater whole. Who hasn't met that new couple, aglow with confidence, and secretly wished them well for as long as it lasts? Honeymooners are the experts at effortless, meltdown sex. Predictably, we have yet to see honeymooners as clients.

   The vast majority of clients coming to us to learn about expanded orgasm are couples in established, long-term relationships. I used to think of these relationships as being three years or longer. These days, however, relationships come and go so quickly that long-term relationships now start at about the six-month point, and that is about the earliest time that couples start coming to us to learn expanded orgasm training.

   Time works both for and against long-term couples. On the one hand, as they continue to share dreams, snuggle, cuddle, laugh, cry, eat, sleep together, and feed each other in every possible manner, hormones of bonding, like oxytocin, kick into action, ensuring their continued attachment to one another. Like comfortably worn shoes, old family traditions, trusty hairdressers, and favorite restaurants, our partner's very existence reassures us that life is worthwhile.

   On the other hand, nature has designed other hormones such as phenylethylamine (PEA) that have us bond just long enough to make that special, hot, sexual connection. These hormones create that love at first sight, romantic longing that we crave, usually for about six months before mysteriously vanishing. As the oxytocin builds and the PEA wanes, couples trade in the hot sauce for a security blanket. Fortunately, while PEA goes down as the length of time in relationship goes up, PEA also peaks during orgasm. Couples who practice expanded orgasm can access all those wonderful feelings of giddy, I'm-in-love euphoria as often as they wish. Thankfully, they are not bounded by the seeming constraints of how long they have been together.

   A shared expanded orgasm practice will not solve all of a couple's problems. A bevy of factors contributes to the ease or difficulty with which we can have ongoing honeymoon sex with our long-term partners. Still, assuming the couple is reasonably happy otherwise, the expanded orgasm practice promises at a minimum to bring back the magic, sweetness, and sparkle of the honeymoon. Regular access to these feelings gives long-termers the fuel they need to keep their relationships vital and to resolve any other problems that invariably arise.

   Expanded orgasm training satisfies those who like to improve their relationship, and those who like to improve their sex life. This training rivets their mutual focus on fun and pleasure. Many couples have viewed this training as a major investment in their future together. It offers them a natural antidote to sexual boredom, some wonderfully good times together now, and technicolor promises of even better times tomorrow.

   Singles also have good reason to pursue expanded orgasm training, as it can—and should—be practiced alone as well as with a partner. Such practice confers a sexual radiance and fulfillment that others clearly sense.

   Rather than feeling needy and deprived, such single practitioners appear brim-full with an inner presence that's attractive to potential partners. Furthermore, they offer partners those eternally desired qualities of a slow hand and an easy touch. They are confident in and out of the bedroom. Through training, they become an attractive catch to prospective partners, and they know it. They learn volumes about what to look for in a partner, too, thus ensuring that future partners will satisfy their ever-rising standards of sensual excellence.

   We are always single people first, whether we are then also dating or in partnership. No matter what your partnership status, your solo practice of expanded orgasm will dramatically enhance your sensual and sexual life. Your own sense of fulfillment emerging from this practice will blossom into all the areas of your life. People who are fundamentally happy with themselves and their partners will enjoy this practice. Those who reap the greatest gains from it have the mental and emotional energy to make an essentially good sex life better. For those who still feel they have serious sexual problems to address, we recommend sex therapy. Couples should plan to begin expanded orgasm training only once these therapeutic issues have been addressed and resolved.

   Anyone can start expanded orgasm training as long as his or her attitude is healthy and positive. We have worked with many grateful pre-orgasmic women, older couples, and even those who have disabilities, to enjoy a far greater range of orgasmic capacity.

   Many long time practitioners of expanded orgasm work with us too. Following the adage that "the rich