Hamilton Academical Football Club, often known as Hamilton Accies, or The Accies, are a Scottish football club from Hamilton in South Lanarkshire who currently compete in the Scottish Premiership, having been promoted from the 2013–14 Scottish Championship. They were established in 1874 from the school football team at Hamilton Academy and remain the only professional club in British football to have originated from a school team. Hamilton have won the Scottish Challenge Cup twice and have finished runners-up in the Scottish Cup twice. The club currently play their home games at New Douglas Park.
Hamilton Academical F.C. was formed in late 1874 by the Rector and pupils of the local school. The club soon became members of the Scottish Football Association and initially began competing in the Scottish Cup and Qualifying Cup, before joining the Scottish Football League in November 1897 following the resignation of Renton.
In the 1970s, Hamilton briefly resigned from the league due to mounting debts. In 1994 the club sold its home ground, Douglas Park stadium, to Sainsbury's supermarket, and subsequently ground-shared in Coatbridge and Glasgow for seven years. During this period the club went through financial hardships and unpaid players went on strike. As a result, Hamilton was unable to fulfil its fixtures during the 1999–2000 season and was docked 15 points, the eventual result of which was relegation to the Third Division. The club moved into its New Douglas Park stadium in 2001.
This is Player Hater One reporting from PHD base. Over.
This is PHD base, go ahead Hater One.
Yeah, we have our talent in sight
How would you have us proceed? Over.
Hater One, this is your Captain Player Hater
What is the talent's position?
Well sir, due to the heavy rains up here
It's hard to tell what the talent is carrying. Over.
Well, I suggest you try real hard, Hater One. Over.
Uh, yes sir, well it looks like
He's carrying something square like, sir. Over.
What do you mean square like? Over.
I don't know sir, a CD of some sort
With glowing lettering. Over.
Hater One, I want you to look very carefully on that disc
And tell me what the letterings are.
Oh my God, this is big, sir
Talk to me, Hater.
"Kelly V-I-P". I repeat, "Kelly V-I-P", sir. Over
He's right captain, this is big
Only if we allow him to reach his destination.
We're waiting on an order, sir. Sir?
Hater One, this is your captain
I order you to take the talent out.
Do not, I repeat, do not under any circumstances
Let this disc be heard. Over
Roger that sir, all systems go.