"If I Had $1000000" is a song by the Canadian musical group Barenaked Ladies from their album Gordon. Composed by founding members Steven Page and Ed Robertson, the sing-along track has become one of the band's best-known songs, and is a live show staple, despite never having been a true single and without an accompanying music video. In the band's iTunes Originals, Page recalls a Maroon-era interview in which bassist Jim Creeggan cited this as his favourite song of theirs, which sparked a realization in Page that the song means so much to so many people, and has become a part of people's memories of a certain time in their lives.
The song first appeared on one of the later versions of the band's first independent release, Buck Naked. The song subsequently appeared on their second and third tapes, Barenaked Lunch, and The Yellow Tape, as well as their 1991 EP Variety Recordings, and their debut CD, Gordon, which would go on to sell over a million copies in Canada, where the song remains very popular and well known. An edited version of the Gordon recording of the song later appeared as a bonus track on the UK edition of Born on a Pirate Ship (this version was later released as a single), and a live version of it was featured on Rock Spectacle. The Gordon version was then included on Disc One: All Their Greatest Hits, bringing the total album count for the song to eight.
Demetri Evan Martin (born May 25, 1973) is an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin.
Martin was born on May 25, 1973 to a Greek American family in New York City, New York, the son of nutritionist Lillian and Greek Orthodox priest Dean C. Martin (now deceased). He grew up in Toms River, New Jersey, and has a younger brother named Spyro.
Martin graduated from Yale University in 1995. During his time there, he wrote a 224-word poem about alcoholism as a project for a fractal geometry class, which became a well known palindromic poem. He was also a member of the Anti-Gravity Society, whose members juggle objects on Sunday evenings on Yale's Old Campus.
Although Martin was accepted into Harvard Law School, he went to New York University School of Law after he received a full scholarship. Martin withdrew from law school before the start of his final year, opting to pursue comedy over finishing his Juris Doctor.
If I Had $1000000
Words and Music by Steven Page Ed Robertson
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you furniture for your house
(Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)
If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love.
If I Had $1000000 I'd build a tree fort in our yard.
If I Had $1000000 You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
If I Had $1000000 Maybe we could put a refrigerator in there.
[Wouldn't that be fabulous]
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you an exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (All them crazy elephant bones)
If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
If I Had $1000000 We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I Had $1000000 We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If I Had $1000000 We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.
(But we would!)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?!)
If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
I'd be rich.