If Rahu and Ketu Had a Podcast – Conspiracies, Chaos, and Cosmic Gossip!

Welcome to —the only podcast that thrives on confusion, unpredictability, and mind-bending theories. Hosted by the celestial troublemakers themselves, this show is less about facts and more about stirring the cosmic pot.

Rahu kicks things off by exposing the about the Moon. Why does it control tides? Why do people lose their minds on full moons? And most importantly, why did it betray Rahu during the churning of the ocean? Ketu, the silent observer, throws in cryptic one-liners, making it all sound even more ominous.

While Mercury gets blamed for technological failures, Rahu insists it’s actually a distraction from bigger cosmic events. Ketu, being the detached mystic, adds that reality itself is an illusion, making listeners question their existence.

This is where things get spicy. Rahu casually drops hints about famous personalities allegedly being disciples, responsible for global trends. Ketu, speaking in riddles, hints at which stars might be "operating on another frequency" ().

A heated debate. Rahu argues that technology, capitalism, and social media are proof that he's in control. Ketu, unimpressed, reminds everyone that detachment is the final answer. After all, if nothing is real, does control even exist?

Since Rahu and Ketu are responsible for eclipses, they take full credit for scaring ancient civilizations. Rahu gleefully recalls how people used to bang utensils and chant mantras out of fear. Ketu, as always, remains mysterious and drops a final line—
Whether anyone learns anything from this podcast is debatable, but one thing is certain—chaos is the only constant when Rahu and Ketu are in charge.