Many kids dream of becoming doctors,
fireman or police officers. They see what their parents and other adults are
doing and aspire to accomplish those same things. It is unlikely, however, that
you’ll hear a kid say, “I want to work in dry cleaning!” or “Doctor? Lawyer? No
way. I want to join a haunted house crew!”
Help Wanted, a new party game for
Nintendo Wii, takes all kinds of jobs and turns them into mini-games. If the job
is uncommon or completely fictitious (I don’t think “superhero” is an
occupation), the game welcomes it with open arms. If not, the Help Wanted will
add a quirky element or two. As a dentist, you don’t pull heavily decayed teeth
from men numbed up on Novocain – you pull teeth from patients who are fully
aware of the pain you’re causing. They’ll cry, scream and put an end to your
mission if you can’t wiggle it out with as little pain as possible.
But wait – there’s a time limit! The
clock is always counting down, adding yet another obstacle for players to
overcome. It’s nothing too harsh though; as you can probably tell by the
family-friendly box art, Help Wanted is a very easygoing game.
For The Unemployed
Help Wanted’s content is divided
into three modes: Employment Office (career mode), Job Battle (two-player) and
Career Fair (practice mode). The Employment Office mode is where you’ll earn
cash, unlock new jobs and work your way toward saving the world.
“Um…what!?”
Yes kids, you’re not playing Help
Wanted solely for the purpose of cow-milking fun. You’re taking each job – and
fighting hard for every extra dollar – to earn enough cash to buy a special
device that will enable you to prevent a meteor from striking the Earth. Crazy?
No question. But crazy is this game’s middle name.
The meteor’s impending doom isn’t
anything like Armageddon or Deep Impact, so you don’t have much to worry about.
There is, however, a counter that will frequently update players on how many
days are left before the meteor is expected to strike. Various occurrences –
such as being handed a magical flower – miraculously extend the number of days
before the meteor will hit. This seems to happen automatically as you play
through the game, regardless of your success rate.
Success is important though. Each
job is highlighted with expected base and maximum payouts. If you’re really
good, you’ll be able to gain a little extra dough, reducing the time it takes to
buy new uniforms, which are needed to unlock new jobs. Time is of the essence –
every job you play counts as one game day. Jobs are posted within the in-game
Web site (not an actual Web site, since Help Wanted does not offer any online
features). The game uses the standard six-day workweek format, so you won’t be
able to find work on Sundays. If you choose to do something other than work
during the workweek – such as buying a new uniform – you’ll lose an entire day.
Thus, it’s best to make purchases on Sundays when there aren’t any other
options.
Minimum Wage
During the week, bonus jobs may be
offered. You might get the chance to be a superhero, which translates to a
hack-n-slash experience with a Power Rangers lookalike. This is one of the more
challenging mini-games, partially due to the cheap boss battle.
If being a superhero isn’t your
thing, how about a snowboarding trip? All you have to do is hop on the board and
make a special delivery … without soaring off a cliff! The result is a
timing-based mini-game where you must quickly pull up on the Wii remote before
the snowboarder reaches the cliff.
A younger James Cameron might have
enjoyed the deep-sea diving gig, which drops you down into the ocean with a
submarine and a claw. Tilt the Wii remote left or right to spin the submarine
within this 360-degree underwater environment. Use the claw to snatch crabs and
other crustaceans.
Like it or not, you won’t be gliding
across snow or diving beneath the sea every day of your life. Most of the time
you’ll be pushing a hospital patient (who’s resting uncomfortably in bed)
through narrow corridors, trying desperately to get him to the ER before the
time runs out. When you’re not doing that, you’ll be ironing wrinkles out of
shirts. Or cleaning footprints off the top of an airliner (think back: Sonic had
a stage where he walked on a plane. Could they be his footprints!?). Or
delivering packages while trying to avoid dogs and sprinklers. Or flinging your
arms around as a bodybuilder. Or…
Which is where Help Wanted will
succeed with younger gamers but could fail with everyone else. The zany jobs are
certainly different, and the newfangled take on dentistry, EMT, manicurist and
other real professions is amusing. At the same time, the game is insanely
repetitive, since you must play each job several times – or the same job many,
many times – to earn enough cash to unlock the remaining stages. It’s a cycle
that is unavoidably tiresome. Kids are less likely to be annoyed by this aspect,
so here’s a word of advice to gaming parents: let little Timmy play through the
career to unlock each job before joining him for a game.
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Gameplay: 7.0
Fun comes from unlikely places in Help Wanted. Still, this is definitely a
kids-only affair; parents won’t be bored playing it with their kids, but that’s
about the only other demographic this game reaches.
Graphics: 5.0
The cutesy cartoon effects aren’t awful, but they’re no better than what
party games were producing 10 years ago.
Sound: 2.0
Quirky music and sound effects can be good. These are just annoying.
Difficulty: Easy
The how-to-play descriptions aren’t always clear, but the game itself is
pretty easy.
Concept: 6.9
The quirky and over-the-top elements are cool. But these mini-games, no
matter how unique in their unlikely presentations, are not that different from
the motion-based mechanics of other Wii games.
Multiplayer: 7.1
Help Wanted could’ve benefited from a four-player option. The two-player
battles are entertaining though, especially if you enjoy the single-player
experience.
Overall: 7.0
Unusual mini-game entertainment built specifically for kids.
