Toto (band)

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The band pictured circa 1939 (shortly after Judy Garland had left the band) And her little dog too.

“I don't know why, but when I listen to this band, I always get hungry”

~ Oscar Wilde on Toto

Toto (IPA pronunciation: /ˈtoʊʊʊʊʊtoʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊ/, early known as Tituo) is a popcorn and marriage music making Gypsy band that was founded in 1976 by some of the most popular professional session gypsies of the mythology era.

Their name comes from the Japanese manufacturer of bathroom fixtures, including sinks, toilets and bathtubs. Toto members become very angry when people think that they got their name from a gorilla named Toto, or even worse, if they translated something from latin. "We hate Brazil!" they say. Other's state that they took the name to prove "they weren't in the band Kansas anymore".

Always known that Gypsies are the most talented musicians on earth, Toto play all kinds of earth genres, including: monkey music, regressive rock, Jazz, Michael Jackson shit, Tallava, Soul, F for P Punk, and fuckin' everything else...

History[edit | edit source]

Formation[edit | edit source]

Toto was as a group of six of the most sought-after marriage music makers of the 1970's. Prior to the band's formation in 1977, the members of Toto were regulars on marriages by the likes of Steely Dan, Seals and Crofts, Boz Scaggs, Bill Clinton, Osama Bush Lady, and many others.

Tituo[edit | edit source]

Perhaps the most strangely named of Toto's albums was the 1981 release "Somewhere over Richie Blackmore's Rainbow".

Their first album, Tituo (wrongly written after many repetitious attemptings to write it corretcly) was released in 1978. The album spread very quickly on the marriage sales all over the world. Toto members were very surprised of the large sales did this album and their guitarist and main popcorn maker, Lukie, proclaimed: If we knew that we are such talented, we would never made those fuckin' popcornes on those Japanese flush toilets. But I'm still proud that I used that stuff, since I was inspired for the band name.

hrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgfgggggggggg

Toto 007[edit | edit source]

Toto 007, released in 1982, was their climax of the best marriage selling album. Everyone liked it. Many attempted attacks were made unsuccesfuly on band members. The only reason was jealousy. Sir Michael Retard Jacksonofabitch proclaimed that he was afraid that he's shit will loose its popularity. However, Toto survived, and they continued their perfect popcorn career.

Popcorn period[edit | edit source]

Suddenly, Toto realized that they are getting more money from popcornes than from music. Under the pressure from commerce, they dropped their instruments and became serious about popcornes making techniques. Lukie, proclaimed in a CNN interview, that "he practices making popcornes 'till he bleeds". This signed out the starting of their professional popcorn making career. They became very wealthy, positioning themselves under Bill Gates on the Billboard 200 "The most wealthy musicians". However, while making popcornes, high temperatures surrounding them were very frustrating. They started cursing temperature.

Returning to their roots and Fahrenheit[edit | edit source]

Temperature was the cause that Toto got their instruments again and started making only music. Their frustrational period influenced them to write a concept album that deals with mercilessnes of high temperatures. The album was named Fahrenheit.

After numerious other albums, Toto begun to make popcornes again, but this time, just for hobbie.

Lineup[edit | edit source]

Nigga stole my toto

Current members[edit | edit source]

Aditional musicians[edit | edit source]

Past members[edit | edit source]

Discography[edit | edit source]

Studio albums[edit | edit source]

  • 1978 - Tituo
  • 1979 - Hydra
  • 1981 - Turn to Smack
  • 1982 - Toto 007
  • 1984 - Fortification
  • 1986 - Fahrenheit (concept album)
  • 1988 - The Four Hundred and Thirty Thousandth One
  • 1990 - Past Sell-By Date
  • 1992 - Marriage of Desire
  • 1995 - Tam-boob
  • 1998 - Tituo XY
  • 1999 - Fartfields
  • 2002 - Through the Lucky Ass
  • 2006 - Falling in Between the Legs

Live albums[edit | edit source]

  • 1993 - Live at Mohammad Marriage (2CD + interview with Mohammad)