PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

141

TanTha1lr
The preparations for the ensuing season at this delightful place of
recreation are going on as swimmingly as ever. It is at present intended
to open them on St. Swithin's Day, and a handsome pavilion has been
erected at the entrance, for the hire of umbrellas and overalls. The
members of the orchestra will also wear the new Macintosh uniforms.
Several alterations have been made in the gardens, amongst which the
ground formerly appropriated to the fireworks has been let to the
Meteorological Society, who will, in future, hold their meetings there, to
calculate the quantity of rain fallen in the year, for the almanacks, this
being accounted the most eligible spot in the Metropolis. The fetes will
be conducted in the same style of aqueous splendour as heretofore ; and,
should the lessee be enabled to effect an engagement with the Comet, it is
in contemplation to persuade it to delay its departure, that the gardens
may be lighted in a novel manner. Each of the illumination-lamps will
be fitted up with a small umbrella, to keep them from being filled with water,
which has been found, on some occasions, to prevent them burning
properly.

K.ite-fiying in the City.
Jacob Lopez and Ephraim Kotip were this day brought before Sir Peter
Laurie charged with a misdemeanor, which has of late grown intolerable
in the city ; we mean the very hurtful and dangerous custom of kite-
flying. The prisoners were old offenders, having been very often detected
in the like practice near the Royal Exchange. Sir Peter Laurie said it
was impossible for him to restrain his wonder, when he considered the ages
of the culprits. The worthy magistrate then entered upon a long and
very valuable homily on kite-flying; its pernicious effects upon society,
and the evil that inevitably fell upon those who gave way to so deplorable
a custom. The offenders evinced the greatest hardihood, laughing and
significantly placing the tips of their thumbs to their noses. The worthy
alderman, with tears in his eyes, sentenced the culprits to take up their
kites, or in default to be committed to the Queen's Bench. Sir Peter
incidentally observed, that the " iron-honp nuisance" was bad enough,
but that the abominable practice of kite-flying was too often the ruin of
the peace of families.

Regulations for the Aerial Courier.
The Aerial Courier will take up at the place of starting, and set down
immediately afterwards. Passengers are requested to take notice, that
asses' heads will be turned towards the moon, and that omnibuses will be
in waiting within a few yards of the place from setting out for the con-
tinent, in order to bring them immediately home again. The public are
also informed, that though steam is used, there is no danger of explosion,
us nothing is less calculated for going off than the whole arrangements of
the Aerial Courier.

Honour conferred toy the Queen on the Drama,
This day. at the levee at St. James's, Mr. Sheridan Knowles had the
honour of receiving knighthood at the hand of her most gracious Majesty.
We understand that the Dramatic Authors' Society will—in celebration
of the event—lunch at a French house in the Haymarket.

Extraordinary Phenomenon.
The extraordinary mildness of the weather has had a very surprising
effect upon vegetation, and more particularly in the metropolitan districts.
Exactly opposite the twenty-third rail (reckoning from Temple Bar), on
the south side of the enclosure of the church of St. Clement's Danes, two
blocks, forming part of the wood pavement of the road, have put forth
shoots nearly two inches in length! What renders this fact the more
surprising is, that one block is of Baltic and the other of American timber.
If this weather holds, it is confidently expected next week all the wood
pavement will be in full bloom.

Interesting to Naturalists.
The valuable' collection of aquatic birds in St. James's Park will be
rendered additionally interesting during the ensuing summer, by the
adoption of a suggestion of Mr. Peter Borthwick, M.P. Every fowl has
suspended in the front a label, on which is painted its name, genus, &c,
&1bo the name of the particular island which it is likely to select for brood-
ing. A few more suggestions of this character, and Peter ought to have
a pension.

Notices of Motion for the First of April.
Mr. Hi'me to move for an estimate of the expense of keeping the ducks
on the omp.mental water in St. James's Park, with a list of all the birds,
the quantities eaten by each, the number of eggs laid within the last year,
and the amount of provisions, as near as can be ascertained, gratuitously
supplied by the public to the birds in question.
Colonel Sibthorp to move for a return of the length of notice of motion
which has been usually given by the earth previous to an earthquake.

TRIUMPH OF ART,
We perceive, by the daily press, that a magnificent Red Satin Umbrella,
made as a present for one of the Eastern potentates, rejoicing in the name
of the Sultan Abdul Medjib, has been submitted to the inspection of her
Majesty. This rare piece of work unscrews into various portions, and
contains in the handle, as we are told, a set of tea-things, a writing-desk,
and hat-box ; two decanters, a bottle-jack, a select library, hair brush,
wash-hand-stand, and light camp-bedstead. This has given an impetus
to native manufactures, and an elaborate specimen of the article has just
been finished by Mr. Walker, of Hoxton, for the National Umbrella Art
Union, lately alluded to in Punch. The canopy is of rich brown gingham,
relieved at the edge by a double stripe of ashy gray, and secured to ribs of
the finest whalebone, carved at the extremities to represent black eribbage
pegs. The ferule at the end is struck out of pure brass. On opening it,
a round piece of leather, curiously vandyked at the edges, is seen at the
top ; and the stick is exquisitely painted to represent rosewood. Th«
handle unscrews, and presents a fine head of Dr. Syntax, of the purest
tariff horn ; and the whole forms, when opened, a perambulating print-
shop of the most imposing description. The inauguration will take place
immediately, and the shop will be opened ou the first dull evening in
Picket-street.

SCIENTIFIC NOTICE.
An interesting description of a process for the elimination of jokes was
last Friday evening read by Professor Faraday at the Royal Institution.
It consisted, according to the Professor, in lining the pockets of a literary
gentleman with tin (not tin-foil), and introducing into his stomach a given
quantity of venison or Welsh mutton, and a certain number of glasses of
champagne. In some cases, the learned gentleman stated, good port,
sherry, or an alcoholic mixture of brandy and water, or even malt-liquor,
will answer the purpose. The administration of these substances to the
subject of the experiment is speedily followed by an exhilaration of spirits,
productive of a brisk ebullition of jokes. The foregoing process has been
found much more effectual than the inhalation of the laughing gas.

EXTRAORDINARY LONGEVITY.
The following highly flattering testimonial has been forwarded to the
Proprietor of Parr's Life Pills, from the Editor of the "Gentleman's
Magazine."
gIRi—My long-protracted existence has for a long time been the theme
of universal wonder ; and many have been the theories propounded in
explanation of a circumstance apparently so unaccountable. Allow me
at once to gratify scientific curiosity, by stating that I owe an age far
beyond the term of ordinary existence, to the use of your Life Pills ;
one of which, ever since my first starting in the world, 1 have taken night
and morning. With full permission to you to make whatever use you
may think fit of this communication,
I remain, Sir,
Your most obedient, humble Servant,
Sylvanus Urban, Gent.
St. John's Gate, Ci.erkknwe7.l,
April 1, 1843.

Wednesday.—Last night, policeman 999, Z division, brought the alarm-
ing news to the Mansion House of the Comet having made his appearance
in the neighbourhood of the House of Parliament. The Lord Mayor
instantly called a meeting of Aldermen, to see what was to be done if he
should come through Temple Bar. He proposed sending it to Newgate.
Sir Peter Laurie recommended inviting him to a public dinner. The
standing Counsel expressed a doubt if he had a mouth. Sir Peter said he
must have a mouth, as he has a tail. Counsel then informed them that
as he is one thousand times larger than the earth, there might be some
difficulty in getting him into Guildhall, and they had better let him >iar
it ,u the provinces. The policeman is to make a report every half minute
to the Home Office. As it is so near Parliament, it is Bupposed that
Sibthorp or D'Israeli are connected with it.
TO BUTTERMEN.
The Anti-Corn-Law League having occasion for a quantity of pamphlets
to stitch into the Magazines, and leave at the doors of houses, are ready to
treat for large quantities of waste paper cut into octavo size, which it is
presumed will answer the purpose of the prize essays and tracts that have
been hitherto circulated.

INTERESTING COMMUNICATION.
Union Workhvmr, April 1, 1843.
Dear Tom,—They tell me if we looks out at eight o'clock to-nigh*
towards the south, we shall see some meat here.
Yours,
Jack Pauper.