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Mike Massie
Tomatometer-approved critic
Biography:
Mike Massie is one-half of The Massie Twins, identical twin film critics who have been professionally reviewing movies full time for over 13 years, appearing on TV, radio, online, and in print. They are members of the Phoenix Critics Circle and the Internet Film Critic Society and their work can be seen at www.GoneWithTheTwins.com. Their latest book "The Movies That Time Forgot" is available now at Barnes & Noble and Amazon.
Publications:
Critics' Group:
Movies reviews only
| Rating | T-Meter | Title | Year | Review |
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The Apprentice (2024) |
Where it would be funny if it weren’t truthful, it’s instead staggeringly disturbing in its veracious revelations. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Oct 09, 2024
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Joker: Folie à Deux (2024) |
It may be ambitious, inexplicable, and one-of-a-kind, but that so rarely translates into something engaging – or even watchable. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Oct 03, 2024
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The Thief of Bagdad (1924) |
It’s difficult to dismiss the influence this picture had on subsequent fantasy and adventure yarns, not just due to Fairbanks’ popularity, but also with the epic nature of the project’s construction. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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The Mosquito Coast (1986) |
As devastating as it is unforgettable. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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The Slumber Party Massacre (1982) |
At least the film has a very short runtime, clocking in at less than 80 minutes, even if its pacing is so bad that it occasionally feels as if it’s an hour too long. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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The Lost Boys (1987) |
This Joel Schumacher-directed picture is so devoid of surprises, authentic thrills, and effective comedy that it’s essentially just a pitifully cobbled-together bore. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Dead Poets Society (1989) |
Though it’s marginally overlong, the script is absorbing. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Vanilla Sky (2001) |
Psychological shocks and an unreliable narrator keep things engaging, even with brief lulls and a purposely frustrating timeline, presenting continual unease and uncertainty. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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How to Marry a Millionaire (1953) |
Nothing much is demanded from the performers, but some of the dialogue is quite humorous – along with some fitting repetition (and related segues) that aids the love stories that stick. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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The Truman Show (1998) |
It’s a curious social experiment idea, even if it's steeped in a fantasy so comprehensive that it always feels unconvincing. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Sergeant York (1941) |
One of the phoniest of all war pictures, exhibiting limited entertainment value, blandly stereotypical personas, a routine construction (and a painfully overlong runtime), and minimal genuineness. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Project A 2 (1987) |
The fight sequences are nicely orchestrated and mirthful, but too much time is spent attempting to flesh out all the interweaving character groups, causing tedious lags. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Black Scorpion II: Ground Zero (1996) |
The bulk of this sequel is so shoddily made, ridiculously scripted, and poorly acted that it can barely be considered entertainment. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Black Scorpion (1995) |
As bad as this production is, it wasn’t exactly unsuccessful; a sequel followed, as well as a 22-episode television series. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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The Lady From Shanghai (1948) |
The climax in a funhouse is terribly entertaining, making striking use of mirrors and distortion to frame a collection of corrupted participants. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 16, 2024
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Transformers One (2024) |
It may be largely unoriginal, but it’s still a considerable amount of simple, clean fun. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Sep 13, 2024
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The Killer's Game (2024) |
It’s quite fortunate that Bautista is a strong lead, since many of the film’s other choices work against its success. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Sep 13, 2024
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Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024) |
Though it so consummately captures the aura of its predecessor that it could never stand alone, since so much of its identity is tied into knowledge of the existing property, it's still an absolutely exceptional sequel. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Sep 04, 2024
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The Secret of Santa Vittoria (1969) |
The conclusion is thoroughly unforgettable, even if it’s in the face of a danger that viewers will know is unconvincing. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) |
Since the plot can’t offer a wealth of surprises, certain visuals end up presenting the most intrigue, even if many sequences are merely polished recreations of unforgettable imagery from the Murnau classic. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Silkwood (1983) |
It’s the performances that will stay with viewers for far longer than the shocking conclusion, especially considering the uncertainties surrounding Silkwood's irresolute ending. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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The Horror of Frankenstein (1970) |
Deliriously humorous, not only in abrupt editing techniques and figurative dialogue, but also in the various events that lead to death and destruction. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Poltergeist III (1988) |
The last act is a mere collection of chases and spooky encounters and nightmarish near-death scenarios, a few of which are intriguing, but do little to expand upon Carol Anne's plight. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Return of the Fly (1959) |
Violence is similarly more frequent and graphic, but it's the anticipated and appropriately ghastly climactic reveal - all too familiar in design yet tremendously satisfying - that proves to be a genuine crowd-pleaser. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Nosferatu (1922) |
The work as a whole is impossible to dismiss; the influence of Murnau's unauthorized adaptation is no less than monumental. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Ghost Town (1988) |
Interestingly, this ghost movie is also a Western; but neither distinct genre is handled very well. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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The Equalizer 3 (2023) |
This series didn’t need a “final” episode, but it’s nevertheless entertaining for what it is - and what it sets out to be. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Under Paris (2024) |
The awkwardness of a CG monstrosity darting around escalates; the movements are terribly amateurish in their designs. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Blue Monkey (1987) |
Too silly, unfocused, and poorly designed to have much of an impact. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Life Is Beautiful (1997) |
The last act is monumental - in its crushing revelations, the inevitable deterioration and near-misses of the complex charade, and the chance coincidences that constitute alternating hope and despair. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953) |
Although the entire premise is meant to be silly, airy, and romantic, it's difficult to dismiss the sexual themes and the antiquated ways in which men and women are characterized. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Signs (2002) |
The scares are expertly handled; there’s an undeniable cleverness to the idea that a potential alien invasion could re-instill religious ardor just as it terrorizes an unprepared community. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Training Day (2001) |
Washington is instantly, absolutely superb; without ever missing a beat, he’s unpredictable, reckless, macho, funny, and frightening. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Galaxina (1980) |
Despite the obvious parodies of popular space operas and other sci-fi properties, the tone here is so off-the-wall that it’s continuously difficult to know what scenes are meant to be taken seriously and which ones are purely comedic. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Crocodile (2000) |
Though there’s an animatronic behemoth utilized in rare sequences, the bulk of the onslaughts employ a mere scaly tale appendage – or, worst of all, a completely computer-animated mess of outrageously unconvincing inferiority. - Gone With The Twins
Read More
| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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The Black Stallion (1979) |
Despite the engagingly unanticipated complexity, the pacing is still slightly off; there isn’t a wealth of unnecessary moments, but some of them are stretched out and conspicuously unhurried. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Lassie Come Home (1943) |
An enjoyable, good-natured ride, avoiding significant conflict for the sake of relating a pleasant parable – and boasting a stunningly heartfelt finale. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Stripped to Kill (1987) |
It also doesn’t help that the finale is so unlikely and nonsensically rambunctious as to negate any sense of tension or revelations about motives. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Cobra (1986) |
At least the picture builds to a rip-roaring showdown, like something out of a high-powered, bullet-laden, casualty-strewn neo-Western. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 25, 2024
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Alien: Romulus (2024) |
It derives far too much from Prometheus and Alien: Covenant, and not enough from Alien and Aliens. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 14, 2024
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Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F (2024) |
It certainly helps that a couple of one-liners are absolutely gut-busting, while apparently no expense was spared with the destructive stunts in this strangely comforting, low-stakes actioner. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Aug 07, 2024
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Deadpool & Wolverine (2024) |
Once again, the biggest predicaments with Deadpool’s universe are those of invincibility and unlimited power - elements the humor can't fully mask. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 23, 2024
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The Patriot (2000) |
The climax is a substantial spectacle, saving the best (or worst) of the bloodletting and destruction for last. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 21, 2024
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Stargate (1994) |
Not enough of the plot was designed well enough to stand out from the pack of other ’90s sci-fi flicks; creative complications are simply far too few. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 21, 2024
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Life Stinks (1991) |
It’s difficult to dismiss the simplicity and sweetness of the ludicrously rich discovering a new perspective on impoverishment - no matter how unlikely and caricaturized it is here. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 21, 2024
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Sleeping With the Enemy (1991) |
One of the great cautionary tales in cinema, boasting an excellent performance by Roberts and a satisfying (if protracted) finale. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 21, 2024
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The Wraith (1986) |
Most of it is simply far too predictable and inconsequential, working from the flimsiest of premises. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 20, 2024
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History of the World: Part I (1981) |
As with many of the writer/director/producer’s works, not every gag lands (a couple actually fall quite flat), with a few portions meandering a touch, but several definitely stand out, sure to endure. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 20, 2024
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The Twelve Chairs (1970) |
Undoubtedly represents a steppingstone for Brooks, who would hone his filmmaking approach in his spoofs to come. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 20, 2024
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Fame (1980) |
A lively, momentous demonstration of craft. - Gone With The Twins
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| Posted Jul 20, 2024
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