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Pitch Black (2000)
HERE WE GO, AGAIN!!
Why do so many writers insist on taking a fairly good sci-fi story and screwing it up by creating an air-headed, dizzy, incapable female lead character, then casting a female actor who can't act? Then, to make matters worse, they create some sub-characters who are not only ridicules, but actually detract from the main story. I guess they need victims (food) for the monsters. This is a good sci-fi story with all the right elements and a strong male lead. However, it falls short in the female lead and in the minor characters.
Holmes & Watson (2018)
THERE SHOULD BE A WAY.......
There should be a way that SOMEBODY could sue the makers of this abortion for making any reference to Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson!! A true failed attempt at humor; a waste of cinematic effort and a terrible waste of stock film!!!
Northfork (2003)
CAN'T BELIEVE I ACTUALLY WATCHED MOST OF THIS!!!
Unbelievable!!! They spent an estimated $1.9 million on this!?!? Maybe they'd like to spend a full $2 million on a story about a nun who raises earth worms in a shoebox in her closet!!!
Vertical Limit (2000)
REALLY??
First, they needed a much, much better Annie Garrett!! Second, they needed a better story without all the peripheral BS! Third, they needed to tell a story without so many impossible plausibilities!!
Green Zone (2010)
NOT A BAD WAR FLICK!
This is a fairly good war picture with multiple bad guys!! That being said, the cinematography sucks, as does the editing! You have to be really on your toes to catch the extremely short cuts, and you better take some motion sickness meds for the rocky camera shots!! Often, the camera operator seems confused as to what to do! Steadicam would have been much better!!!
The Cloverfield Paradox (2018)
STUPID MOVIE!!
Even with someone restraining J.J. Lensflare from adding his overdone touches of lens flares all over the place, this was a stupid movie! It looks like it was a good story with potential, but it fails as a movie!
The Happening (2008)
INTERESTING CONCEPT, BUT..........
It's a very interesting concept that the flora of this planet has finally had enough of our egotistical, self centered, "know-it-all", destructive species and attacks with a little well-deserved payback! And, what more deserving a place to start than NYC, immediately followed by New Jersey! On the plus side, this movie offers a couple well-known, established and capable actors. There is an overall "quality" to the movie, not always found in offerings of this genre. It does follow one of the very basic rules of storytelling...it has a beginning, a middle and an end. That's about it for the positive aspects. On the negative side? Well, there are too many "negatives" to list here. Things just don't go together. In far too many instances, the physics don't work. There are too many scenes in which the elements work against each other, making those scenes "uncomfortable", consciously and subconsciously. Overall, it doesn't work! It was too obvious that M.N.Shyamalan was chasing the dragon and reaching for another jaw-dropping reveal, as in Sixth Sense! At least, it made money.....and THAT'S the name of the game!
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
Oh, God....AGAIN??
The only possible positive comment on this offering is that it does contain some commonality with all the other Jurassic offerings.....moronic, air-headed female leads, and characters who are so dimwitted they can't find their way out of bed, in the morning, without help! Two stars, only for the efforts of the CGI team!
Highway Thru Hell (2012)
WELL SCRIPTED, BUT FAIRLY STUPID
"Closure is NO option", huh? Then, why are they routinely closing down the highway? Another scripted "reality" show that just doesn't hack it!!
Heavy Rescue: 401 (2016)
VERY FUNNY SHOW!!!
This is an extremely funny show!! First, they claim, "Closure (of the highway) is NOT an option!" Yet, they are constantly closing the highways! And, if you watch for details, the editing sucks and is all over the place!! Fairly well scripted show!!
William Tecumseh Sherman: Beyond the March to the Sea (2019)
SHERMAN...THE BAD GUY
Somewhat interesting presentation about W.T. Sherman who, as one of Lincoln's cronies, could easily be viewed as a war criminal during and after the Civil War! Extremely bad narration!
Annihilation (2018)
SILLY
This movie never grabbed my attention. As it went on, I found myself finding other things to do while it played....read my email, pet the dog, read the paper, etc. It seemed silly. Not a good view. I gave it three stars for the efforts of the crew.
Halloween Hell (2014)
WOW! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Talk about your really bad, low budget movies! If you like 'em, this is right up your alley. Now, let's see.....
-Acting: non-existent. Aren't there supposed to be people who actually ACT in a movie? Maybe I'm wrong, but I always thought that's the way it worked.
-Story: oh, I must have fallen asleep. Sorry! Was there a story anywhere in there? I guess I missed it.
-Locatios/Scenery: whatever places were open for business and we're handy on the day of shooting
-Lighting: au natural. That means ya takes what ya gets.
-Photography: that was photography? I think someone from the local high school AV department borrowed a camera from a buddy
-Props: yeah, I guess there were some. They held the doors open.
-Effects/Makeup: looked like Fingerpainting 101. At least the blood looked real red. Must have been all arterial bleeding.
-Editing: what's editing?
-Music: yeah, there was some of that, too, I think
-Other: anyone involved, to any degree, in this, uh, "movie" should definitely NOT give up their day job!
This is just the kind of movie that's absolutely PERFECT for Eric Roberts!
Halloween Hell (2014)
WOW! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Talk about your really bad, low budget movies! If you like 'em, this is right up your alley. Now, let's see.....
-Acting: non-existent. Aren't there supposed to be people who actually ACT in a movie? Maybe I'm wrong, but I always thought that's the way it worked.
-Story: oh, I must have fallen asleep. Sorry! Was there a story anywhere in there? I guess I missed it.
-Locatios/Scenery: whatever places were open for business and we're handy on the day of shooting
-Lighting: au natural. That means ya takes what ya gets.
-Photography: that was photography? I think someone from the local high school AV department borrowed a camera from a buddy
-Props: yeah, I guess there were some. They held the doors open.
-Effects/Makeup: looked like Fingerpainting 101. At least the blood looked real red. Must have been all arterial bleeding.
-Editing: what's editing?
-Music: yeah, there was some of that, too, I think
-Other: anyone involved, to any degree, in this, uh, "movie" should definitely NOT give up their day job!
This is just the kind of movie that's absolutely PERFECT for Eric Roberts!
Altered (2006)
THE DEAD GUYS ACTED FAIRLY WELL!
Here it is again! A story that could have developed into something interesting...maybe. But, this production was brought down by the acting of the main characters, or rather the lack of acting! The worst was the female lead. The best acting was on the part of the dead guys! The aliens were, well, aliens. We don't know how real aliens act, anyway, so any alien performance must be tolerable. I've always thought that a good dose of Tub & Tile cleaner was a great way to protect myself from alien attack. Keep that little trick in your anti-alien kit. I think Universal could have put to better use the $8 million spent on this. They could have added another ride in the amusement park!
The Plainsman (1936)
THANK GOD DeMILLE ONLY MADE MOVIES
Thank God DeMILLE only made movies and didn't write history books! Of course, our history books, today, are fairly inaccurate, too!
Alien: Covenant (2017)
HANG YOUR HEAD IN SHAME, MR. SCOTT
One of the most rediculas, poorly written sci-fi movies I have ever seen! What a shame so much effort was expended in making such a low-class movie! If a production company wants to throw away a heap of money, send a mil or two my way. I could put it to far better use than they did in making a movie like this!
Showtime (2002)
ARE YOU KIDDING?
Are you kidding? Just about right for De Niro and MURPHY!
Camping (2018)
HBO DID THIS? NO WAY!
I've been trying to think of something-just anything-positive to say about this series. I've been trying really hard, but there isn't anything worthwhile! The story, the acting, the video quality, the locations, the effects, the audio, the directing.....right on down the line.....they all equally suck! Come to think of it, this series does have one redeeming value, after all. It serves as another fine example of how far the Great and All-Powerful HBO has slid off its throne and down the mountainside! HBO = Has been; Boring; Obsolete.
A Star Is Born (2018)
A CURE IS BORN! A CURE FOR INSOMNIA!
Once all the smoke clears and the back slapping and ass kissing are over, what will remain is just another cure for a tough case of insomnia. This was a horrible movie! Usually, once even a moderately successful movie ends, and the end credits roll, there is some chit-chat among the attendees as they file out of the theater . The discussions could be about anything...how someone's left foot fell asleep; the secret ingredient in Cousin Cathy's cubical Christmas cookies; how synthetic motor oil helps cure engine knock...just about anything at all. The point is, there's usually some kind of hub-bub going on as the crowd leaves the theater. Not in this case! Silence! The silence of the shocked and disappointed crowd was deafening and could not be ignored. I know, as fact, that as much as I dislike KrIs Kristofferson and Barbra Streisand, THEIR version of "A Star is Born" (1976) never put me to sleep. Not once! THIS version of "A Star is Born" (2018), with Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga, put me to sleep SEVERAL times, each time requiring the necessary elbow strikes from my wife--who was waging her own war against unconsciousness, but without the aural component I was emitting. I think you get the picture (no pun intended). This was a sleep-inducing, bad movie! Do NOT see it, as often as you can!
The Haunting of Hill House (2018)
COULD BE BETTER
The acting is borderline, but usually acceptable. However, the writing and direction suck!
The Four Feathers (2002)
TERRIBLE!
Is there no imagination or talent left in all mighty Hollywood? Apparently not! The flood of remakes and rehashings of old stories appears to support that. Why do they remake older movies? Because they can! Because they can wash old stories through their computers and techno devices, Panavision lenses and digital cameras and, Ta-Da...a new movie! But, they fail to realize the new retellings are never as good as the original movies! Never! The newer movies lack the heart and craftsmanship and creativity of the originals. They're just bigger! This worthless piece of film is a good example! The 1939 movie was far better in all respects.
Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017)
TOO BAD
This was a surprisingly good, entertaining movie---especially for a remake/sequel. That is, it was surprisingly good.....until Jack Black showed up. Then, the rating suddenly and severely dropped.
Cattle Drive (1951)
CAPTAINS COURAGEOUS ON DIRT - SO WHAT?
Okay...so we all know Cattle Drive (1951) is Captains Courageous (1937) on dirt, and instead of cut fingers and constantly soaked clothes, it's saddle sores and an endless supply of beans and bad coffee. So what? It doesn't lessen the value of the story, nor reduce the entertainment experienced when watching this movie. It's a little gem of a story. That said, there are some less than positive attributes with Cattle Drive (1951). The worst of these are that, frequently, the movie and the characters seem rushed and even abrupt. This leaves the viewer wanting more ... more development between the two main characters; more interplay with the other hands during the drive, and more information about the "education" of the father at the end of the movie. Having seen this movie subsequent to seeing Captains Courageous (1937), it was difficult not to mentally compare the two while viewing this movie. To some degree, that actually worked against Cattle Drive (1951). Even at that, Cattle Drive (1951) is well worth a look.
The Dyatlov Pass Incident (2013)
ACTING SUCKS!
Here's another one! A possible viable sci-fi story ruined by terrible, awful acting...especially on the part of the female lead! (Let me guess, she once played a daisy in a grade school play!). Her lack of talent is painful to watch! Proof the old casting couch may be alive and well, after all! A real waste of good film stock and crew talents!