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Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020)
Are you kidding me?
OK let me start out with this: I love female characters - I am a man yes - but I really don't care what gender the character is, as long as it has been well written and performed. I could give tons of examples of movies where the female characters outshine (in my mind) the male characters - but let's just take Guardians of the Galaxy where Nebula and Gamora are my favorite characters... Ok...
You know this is bad when I have to make a disclaimer first right? :-)
I really wanted to love this movie... but... "insert random profanities here"
Ok the first and most important thing to point out is this: This movie seems to be very poorly managed. In fact, the action scenes looks like they aren't all part of the same movie - so I had to look it up. Some of the original action scenes were apparently SO BAD that they called in the guy who did the action scenes in John Wick to RESHOOT them ... and it shows! Those scenes + Margot is the only reason why I even give this movie 3 stars...
The Birds ... holy s... I mean really? They are just so weak it's insane... and no I'm not talking physical strength or fighting prowess - but story telling - or lack there of. Poorly set up, "out of the blue" abilities, lazy lines... It's not even worth going on about it, since I already spend more time on this paragraph than the writers did on this script!
The Black Mask/Roman Sionis - Ewan does what he can with this character, however it is the most generic villain of them all (in the comics) It is just ... WHY THAT CHARACTER? I mean SERIOUSLY DC - you are TRYING to build up the franchise - and on top trying to make this about female empowerment - then why the H... did you pair it with a throwaway antagonist? It makes 0 to little sense - unless you actually didn't care about this movie... which... is... what... it... feels... like. For crying out loud DC...
... And lastly it commits the cardinal sin... it's just not funny. I mean I laugh very easily - and I think I smiled like 2 times through the whole movie and laughed 0. It's a movie with Harley Quinn... how am I not laughing - she is probably the funniest character in the DC catalog - or at least in the top 3...... so how did they manage to make me laugh 0 times?
I literally can't grasp how people are giving this movie 9 and 10's ... Suicide Squad was better - and that says a lot since I hated it! Is it only because of the fact that it has a theme of "female empowerment" ... or is it a "R rated superhero movies are AWESOME ALWAYS" thing? I honestly can't think of anything else....
Love you Margot - but you should never have signed up for this pile of incompetence!
Wonder Woman (2017)
Wow.... Really?!
I have never let the whole DC vs. Marvel thing be an issue for me. I like both universes equally - but for very different reasons. This movie is NOT a DC movie. It feels very ... syfy channel with a beefed up budget. The story is so flimsy it's almost unbelievable, the action is VERY "CGI-cartoony", the acting is aimed - it seems - at creating "lovable characters", but fails miserably.
OK we got the American fly-boy, the native Indian, the stumbling and bumbling middle eastern guy, and the crazy jittery Scotchman.... How freaking original! Never seen those characters together before! LOL. The fact that it's the "always used generic Arab"-guy, Chris Pine (who actually plays Kirk like 70% of the time, only less sure of him self and a bit... emo?)... and to top it off the dude from Trainspotting - only furthers to make this whole movie feel cheap and unoriginal!
And Wonder Woman herself... Seriously I love Gal Gadot! She is amazing and probably one of the most beautiful women in the world... Seriously look at her in "Keeping up with the Joneses" - no one could pull off that role better! ... So you should take it with all seriousness when I tell you she falls FLAT on her rear end in this role... and let me explain why:
1: Her "hero-shots" seem too much like "modeling". They spent so much time trying to "show off" Gal it basically takes over the whole focus of the shots, and in many ways makes them seem laughably staged and unnatural! The CGI doesn't help her here AT ALL! If you want a good example of what I mean - notice her hair in the "close up hero shots" ... They CGI'ed it ... it looks REALLY horrible!
2: Her accent and line delivery doesn't fit the character. Again I ADORE her as an actress - but she constantly breaks the immersion by feeling unnatural in the role... It's sort of like George Clooneys portrait of Batman... It's not that George is a bad actor - he just feels WRONG in the role. And YES I'm ACTUALLY comparing the two - because the both left me with that "MAN this movie could have been cool - but something was off"- feeling...
...... this is already TL:DR ... So I'll stop here - but I could keep going... I keep shaking my head when thinking about it... Seriously guys that CGI .......... SO bad! How this movie is getting an 8/10 rating is crazy... I could make tons of theories as to why this is - but SADLY - non of them is actually about the movie... Calling this a mediocre film of this genre is too being nice in my opinion. It tries really really really ..... really REALLY hard to impress, but it's sort of like a puppy trying to do tricks to get your attention - but then it pees on the carpet in over excitement!
Underworld: Blood Wars (2016)
Please consider...
First off - this is the 5 movie in a story line which for the most parts has to "reinvent" it self every time. This will ofcause make it all a bit "flimsy" - HOWEVER - It REMAINS the best series in this genre. If you like this kind of fantasy/horror/action movie - then this movie is kinda great. IT DOES clearly shine through that this movie is made on a VERY limited budget... 35mil USD is peanuts these days, and many mainstream movies use more than that on their marketing!
But... Let's talk about the bad: OK we are introduced to a new "sub breed"/coven of the vampire race... And they can apparently "warp" or "blink" around. First off - if the vampires knew how to do this, then it is VERY unlikely this wouldn't be more common. It is basically a superpower... no wait it ACTUALLY is 100% a superpower! LOL! and they under-utilize it to an insane degree in this movie too in several larger battles without any explanation as to why... Both these battles are pretty desperate - so one would think they would use any trick they have to survive the onslaught... But no...
The main vampire villain is..... so damn generic and predictable that it hurts. She could have been a much more dominant character and it's actually not the fault of the actress in my view... I think she did pretty well with what she was given - so to me this rest souly on the director and the script.
The end fight is really uninspired. MAJOR SPOILER! Selena rips out the lycan leaders spine like it was nothing after just having being pommeled all to hell without resisting... Apparently he never posed any threat to her after her transformation...???
The good: Most of the action and effects are actually pretty close to what the big budget movies brings us - with a few exceptions. Many people talked about the "hero landings" of Selena in the first movie, however this one has a scene which comes fairly close to that (The one where David jumps out of the pool and splits a Lycan in half) It actually made me say "daaaammmnnnn!" out loud. A fairly impressive feat for a low budget movie...
The keep much of the "tacky" feel of the former movies - which is a good thing! It would feel fake if the movie all of the sudden changed tone compared to the 4 other movies - and it succeeds very well in feeling like "another episode" in the franchise! It IS however CLEAR that this is meant as a "precursor to the final chapter" movie, so there are A LOT of unfinished story lines here... So I truly hope we get the 6th movie!
I think much of the rating it has gotten in reviews is due to people not understanding that this is part of a continued story and that this movie IS made with a budget of close to what Jennifer Lawrence got paid for making passengers... If the full budget is 35 mil USD, the actual production budget is most likely close to that 20 mil mark.... which is kind of insane these days! If people want this kind of movie to exist, the CAN NOT fairly judge them as they do an Avengers movie! It is just not fair! I mean Cmon - Even Deadpool which people said had a laughably low budget had 58 mil USD... 23 mil USD more ... which as I said is probably the whole damn production budget of Blood Wars!
This movie is AWESOME for what it is! It nicely bridges the 4th movie and what - if it ever gets made - will most likely be the finale. 17% at 3.8/10 on rotten tomato and those sorts of ratings are dumb as dirt. I shows how many people have been so heavily spoiled by 250mil USD budget marvel movie juggernauts that they have lost their objectivity!
Is it a masterpiece? No... ofcause not! It's a horror/fantasy/action movie... DUH! LOL
Logan (2017)
I'm sorry but I disagree with the general consensus here!
I went to see this movie full of expectations and everyone seemed to just love this movie.
First of... The story... It's nothing we haven't seen before... really! I just falls flat in so many ways and it's FULL of plot holes. The first and foremost is the fact that !SPOILER! the bad guy know where Logan is. "i know what you are hiding down south" ... Really??? The same "what" whom the bad guys knows is "the most dangerous brain in the world" ..... This is just glanced over with some vague explanations of why this is - non of which makes ANY sense, especially seeing how the bad guys are trying to perfect creating controllable mutants - and a mutant clone of Charles would be a POWERFUL tool in achieving this.
2nd - DUMB AS HELL moments !SPOILER! - like the battalion of henchmen all using normal guns - and then the leader of them tells them "Stop shooting at her - she will just heal" - and then a few minutes later basically pacifying her with a god damn speargun with a wire... Seriously if you KNOW what you are hunting, then who the hell is that moronic? It's like being told to dive to the bottom of the ocean and then turning up in shorts and a sombrero! Retardedly hilariously moronic!!!
3rd - The bad guys are so flat and uninteresting it hurts! Seriously generic smartass leader and an eviiiieeelll doctor who just seems to be a carbon copy characters we've seen a billion times over! And what the hell is up with portraying humans as the ultra evil with no morality and bad guys getting away with stuff just because they tell others the whole "I'm just doing my job - so back off" line... (The scene in the hospital/lab is just cringe-worthy!)
4th - Logan him self is just so F-ing emo! It's good and correct for the character to be down a lot due to the circumstances he and Charles find them selves in - however - 90% of the movie he looks like he is about to cry! I mean come on... He is just so damn impotent - yet he pretty much keeps up with his young clone - which is just... LOL ... I mean ... Really...
How ANYONE gives this movie a 10 is beyond me! If this is the best a movie can ever be in your mind then... Wow...
- BUT - It's not a bad movie exactly - The acting for the most parts is pretty good, and the fight scenes are entertaining. It's just not the masterpiece people seem to claim it is - and it's - tbh - not really an X-men movie, but rather a movie which borrows a few of the X-men mutant. In my book - Deadpool is more of an X-men movie than Logan is - so - claiming it's "the best X-men movie ever" is a bit... Meh...
Bad Moms (2016)
The worst writing I've seen in a LONG time!
First off - how most people are rating this movie so high is beyond me... I will mention a few things here - WARNING SPOILERS! I repeat SPOILERS!
The first point is not as much a spoiler as it is a general complaint about people casting Mila in main roles. Just like in Jupiter Assenting she feels like a B-actress surrounded by A- listers... or at least better B-listers. She does a horrible job at displaying emotions, and almost always have a small smirk no matter what emotion she is trying to project.
Scenes which got me REALLY annoyed (tons of other scenes which where just mildly annoying!):
Her daughter gets forced off the soccer team by "illegal" means from Christinas character, and she then goes to confront her in front of a group bunch of her "minions". Christina makes some REALLY weak arguments and burns, and Milas character just eats it with no comebacks of any kind... The scene is INFURIATING seeing how the movie has spent a LOT of time telling you how full of spunk and "clever" comebacks Milas character is...
...
The next scene is even worse... Like... Insanely bad! Christinas character is trying to get Milas character to quit running for president of the PTA ......... by planting a few joints in her straight straight A-geeky-overachiever-daughters locker... which of cause is found because of an anonymous tip. Milas character and her daughter is called in to the principles office to get told that now her daughter - who is off the soccer team now no longer can play ... soccer??? And they just eat it again! DA FAK!!!! Really! If someone planted drugs in your kids locker, and you KNEW 110% that your daughter had never done drugs, what would your reaction be? ... This is what ANYONE which an IQ higher than 84 would do: "Please mr. Principle stop touching that bag. I'm calling the police because that is obviously a plant." ... and when the police arrives "Hi officer can you please run a drug test on my daughter to confirm or deny if she has ANY trace of drugs in her system, and then dust down her locker and that plastic bag for prints - i have a feeling it will match with the president of the PTA - oh and also please run a DNA test on those joints... the DNA might match her or one of her friends also"
But nope... I'll stop here because this could get WAY longer if I didn't stop myself!
The 2 of 10 is because of a few good jokes in there and a few good supporting actors.
Red Faction: Origins (2011)
Underrated and unappreciated.
First off it is important to note that this is a fairly low budget production - a made for TV-movie (Wikipedia info: feature-length science fiction television movie pilot produced by Universal Media Studios and UFO Films debuting on SyFy, it is the first film based on the Red Faction series of video games.)
When you know this, you are aware that the CGI effects might not be avatar crisp, and they aren't! However - they are far above what i had expected, and the story is surprisingly believable. There are a few lose ends, like the reasoning behind some decisions made by various people throughout the movie, but never the less, i have seen plenty of A-list movies where the storyline are way more scrambled and nonsensical than this one.
The general level of the acting is quite good. Especially Brian J. Smith - whom you might know as Lieutenant Matthew Scott from the TV series SG Universe, and Danielle Nicolet has a very solid performance.
The best way to describe this movie, IMO, is a mix between Dune, Star Wars and the feeling you get when playing the game. (And Fallout 3 / new Vegas) Gritty feel, good vs. evil and sci-fi elements... good stuff :-D
I would tell everyone who likes the game, enjoys sci-fi, or likes a good adventure story with a classic "one man and his struggle to make everything right"-frame, to give this movie a chance.
The good: Solid acting Good story A Game-to-movie attempt above the normal standard It's a sci-fi....! :-D
The bad: Sub par CGI compared to A-list movies - but not horrible at all! A few actors who "feels like" B-actors A few plot holes, non to major though
I came into this movie thinking it was another Uwe Boll experience, but i was presently by what Michael Nankin had done with this movie and it's limited budget. It only gets a 7/10 from me, because it does have some of the "made for TV" characteristics, but for what it is, it is one of the best ever!