ChoiBaby

Just in time for the spirit of the Fourth of July! I could not think of a more appropriate movie that relates to the Independence Day theme.

Un film de William Lustig. UNCLE SAM had the potential to be a grand cult classic. However lackluster performances plus a flawed and muddled orchestration prevent UNCLE SAM from earning its stars and stripes...

Master Sergeant Sam Harper (David "Shark" Fralick), an honorable Desert Storm hero is accidentally killed by "friendly fire" while fighting in Kuwait. Tragically, this one time hero has become a mere statistic...

Meanwhile, at Twin Rivers, USA, Jody (Christopher Ogden) sadly misses his uncle. However, when an Army Sergeant (Bo Hopkins) appears, the news of Harper's arrival back to the states is apparently not good news. This Sergeant has plaintively informed Jody and his relatives of Sam Harper's demise. Afterwards, Harper's grieving family wishes to have him receive an honorable burial.

Subsequently, a few twenty year old teenagers decide to foolishly burn an American flag near Sam's resting site. This action has provoked the indignation of Sam Harper. This undead patriotic marine feels deign to teach these delinquents some country pride in the typical fashion. Sam is willing to teach a lesson...at the cost of any human lives.

So "Uncle Sam" returns from the grave to restore rectitude and pride in a small, greedy town gone wrong. He has a fresh crop of sinners at his disposal. Among the characters include: an unlawful sheriff (Matthew Flint), a draft dodging teacher (Timothy Bottoms), a tax evading lawyer (Tim Grimm), and a scornful, self-serving politician (Robert Forster!). Uncle Sam fights for truth, (in)justice...and the American way!

UNCLE SAM was atrociously bad, but in a sort of cheesy way. The ensemble in this movie is a B-movie fan's dream. Even P.J. Soles rounds out the cast as a fastidious mother. Anyhow, the acting in this movie was tremendously weak. The characters lacked charisma, and I personally wanted to see virtually all of the cast members (even the child actors) bite the dust sometime in this film. The young child actor, Ogden, for one is too nettling for his own good. The best performance is by Hayes (Yes, that is the Isaac Hayes who provides Chef's voice in the indelible TV show SOUTH PARK) as an affectionate war veteran. Hayes is the only caring character who does a good job portraying Harper's former mentor who must dissuade young Jody from enlisting in the army. As for good old Robert Forster, let's just say that his performance is "on fire!"

Some wily cleverness manages to shine through but this film suffers heavily from an onerous pace. The death scenes in particular (i.e. Hatchet in the head, a decapitation, throat slitting, gunshot wounds) are far from adulterated. Some of the other subtleties were...unique. I especially chuckled watching Ogden play with those old all American action figures. Another subtlety was Uncle Sam's atypical costume. It is certainly the perfect disguise for a movie villain!

As for the antagonist, Larry Cohen has created a villain whose violent tactics are nothing more but "justified murders." The screenplay though, is a lot less refined. Ostensibly, Cohen had created mixed messages in this movie. Unfortunately, the screenplay fails to convey any of these individual messages thoroughly. Cohen wanted to discern a theme explaining that people throughout history have always been fighting without a cause. People supposedly have fought for the thrill of victory, but nowadays, people seem to fight for no other purpose than the pleasure of killing. On the other hand, Cohen also wanted to elucidate the fact that there are no noble heroes in war...only ones who miraculously survive with blood on his hands... These ideas are implied with the characterization of Uncle Sam and how he became so cold-hearted. The screenplay had strong intentions, but they are not fully expressed. Cohen does a much better job with satire. The mean-spirited satire censuring anti-patriotism and the lack of pride and duty among even America's finest citizens is inventive...up to a point.

UNCLE SAM is probably not William Lustig's best picture, but he has done far worst films. This film though, does not offer much substance except for a wasted great premise. Do yourself a favor and avoid the propaganda. Do not be fooled into witnessing this movie just because you see its excellent, holographic video cover. This vanity production is all decoration...and zero thrills. I may not be able to discourage you from seeing this movie, but I will exhort to you that even if this movie does sound fanciful, it really lacks a soul. If you do manage to sit through this whole movie, watch the end credits to hear a poem written by the veteran himself, cacophonous-voiced William Smith.

RATING: *1/2 out of ****.

Hurrah! Rejoice! More madness from the PM (Pepin-Merhi) duo! ALIEN INTRUDER is notorious for being one of the PM duo's first ventures into the sci-fi (more like science-fantasy) realm. While ALIEN INTRUDER is an entertaining flick, it fails to offer enough nuances of elegance to help make this trip memorable and worthwhile...

Welcome to the grim future. The year is 2022. Aboard the U.S.S. Holly in outer space, mild mannered crew member Borman (Jeff Conaway) has apparently gone berserk. For no logical reason, Borman has callously slaughtered his own men...

Back on Planet Earth, Commander Skyler (Billy Dee Williams) has recently received a desperate call for help. The call has requested that a rescue mission must be dispatched into outer space to find any survivors of the massacre aboard the U.S.S. Holly. So Skyler decides to arbitrarily select four losers to accompany him on this rescue mission. Nick (Maxwell Caulfield) is an intransigent navigator who has almost instigated a space mutiny once... DJ (Richard Cody) is a computer hacker charged with embezzlement. Lloyd (Gary Roberts) is a woman-loving mechanic. Peter (Stephen Davies) is an expert at engineering.

As a reward for their hard work and services, the crew members of the U.S.S. Presley are allowed to relax and indulge in their own lovely gratification. The convicts are allowed a chance to vicariously live out their own pleasures via virtual reality.

Now, meet Ariel. She is every man's dream. She wants to become your playmate.

An alien virus, cleverly disguising herself as a femme fatale named Ariel (Tracy Soggins) has decided to enter each individual program...and turn these people's greatest fantasies into their worst nightmares. Ironically, these petty prisoners and thugs may become entrapped in their own fantasies... Meanwhile, unbeknownst to the daydreaming space travelers, Ariel is intent on luring them to their ultimate doom by forcing one of the crew members to navigate towards the forbidden "G-Sector." While these travelers are distracted by their own illusions, Ariel revels in seducing each victim as she appears in each virtual reality simulation. As a result, tension is created among the crew members themselves...

In space, there is no escape. In space, no one can hear a person die screaming in agony...

ALIEN INTRUDER has a unique premise, even if it is derivative of probably every other science-fiction thriller ever made. The idea of having an attractive but deadly seductress as the prime adversary is an unexpected turn for a science-fiction film.

Every science-fiction cliché ever manifested exists in this potboiler. It features lots of erotic love scenes, interpolated with sporadically violent action sequences. There are lots of gung-ho action in this flick. Along the way, the viewer is treated to a collection of beautiful women! What about the *special* effects? The special effects are not quite so special. Especially staring at that spinning spaceship...what a sizzling special effect. This film is all showmanship and little innovation. Most of the special FX, from the explosions in space to that dizzying space shuttle in distress are far from impressive, but it is allowable, considering the limited budget.

The visual sets, even the Wild West, are utterly depressing. All of the visual settings in this movie are just so murky and dismal. I guess that it kind of reflects the mood of the film in general. One of the virtual reality segments though, shot in black and white, is a sly homage to the "film noir" of the 1950s. The Wild West backdrop is sufficient as well. ALIEN INTRUDER has a really horrendous production, but it is sort of interesting to watch.

The performances in this movie are deadpan with Conaway acting way over-the-top as a psycho on the loose. Billy Dee Williams (whose payback for his supporting role in BATMAN was observably not high enough) seems to know how to have fun here as for the rest of the cast. Tracy Soggins is cute in this movie, especially when she plays mind games with the male cast. It is a joy to watch everyone acting paranoid in this movie...

ALIEN INTRUDER is sort of predictable because the viewer is always one step ahead of the characters. For example, we all know that Ariel will make herself an obligatory part of each of the space convict's dreams. It is just a matter of when she will show up which adds to part of the fun...

ALIEN INTRUDER is a decent but tedious sci-fi film. There is enough sex, violence, and eye candy to appease connoisseurs of sleaze, but this film has immensely restricted appeal. Despite this movie's flaws, it is still admissible. The film does move relatively fast enough, I suppose. At least Pepin and Merhi have managed to delete those dumb, poorly made (and sung) theme songs. Overall, think of ALIEN INTRUDER as a cross between "Playboy" and THE OUTER LIMITS...just without any sense of reverence...

RATING: ** out of ****.

Jesse Palmer (Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs) was one of the best men ever to serve the military during the Vietnam War. He was one soldier who always straightened out his priorities. In every mission he must accomplish, he will always return a hero, or else...he would not have returned at all... Nearly twenty years later, Palmer is out to prove his worth again...

Palmer knows a secret that is a bit esoteric. What he knows could very well have an impact on the reputation of a well-known politician. What he also knows could essentially endanger the lives of his friends and family. What he knows could put his own life on the line. This politician refuses to let Palmer tarnish his own image...so he decides to mark this loose cannon for death!

Palmer, a Vietnam Veteran must discomfit his ex-commanding officer turned crooked senate candidate named Whalen (Lance Lindsay, a Ted Turner look-alike) from conspiring to turn over part of the U.S. Government to terrorists. Whalen has all the help that he can afford. Mercenaries, assassins, a surveillance tracking system, endless firepower, and hired killers are at this corrupt senator's disposal. Oh yes, and who could forget those two muscular ladies, dressed to kill... Palmer, on the other hand, only has his wits, fists and a few other surprises to help put an end to a greedy politician's guileful schemes. This one innocent man must expose this corrupt senator before he wins the election...

Meanwhile, two dirty cops named Russo (Robert Z'Dar) and Overstreet (Jastereo Coviare) happen to work on the wrong side of the law. They have been hired by Whalen to personally annihilate Palmer himself. Not only is Palmer running from the law, but his girlfriend Jana (Nadia Marie) is inadvertently caught in this whole elaborate chase too. What these two fugitives eventually unveil though is a revelation. The "Quiet Fire" conspiracy is a devious project involving the use of high-tech weaponry for the benefit of America's prime adversaries. American may no longer be of use once their own technology on enemy soil is turned against this country...

They're running out of time!

QUIET FIRE is definitely a low-budget and obscure action flick. There is little, if any substance in this interesting but somewhat hackneyed political action thriller. The plot is OK, but it illustrates miniscule novelty. The performances were adequate, but Karen Black was absolutely astounding in a completely off-the-wall performance. As an eccentric storekeeper, Kim (Black) manages to weasel in a few tried moments of humor in an otherwise straightforward action flick. Robert Z'Dar (MANIAC COP) tries to keep it real, but I could not help laugh at his sometimes histrionic performance as a deceitful cop. Maybe it is my perception, but that insidious senator looks so much like Ted Turner. Perhaps it is a mere coincidence...or could this case of double vision lead to a deeper machination? Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs (from the hit TV sitcom "Welcome Back, Kotter") keeps his cool here also. Hilton-Jacobs is casually talented behind as well as in front of the camera.

Though the film moves at a plodding pace, this is a reasonably fun motion picture. The action scenes are smooth and well made with well-executed car chases, gun battles, and martial arts fighting. QUIET FIRE contains stronger quality production values than the usual B-movie.

It's trite, it's generic, but it has a well-structured formula. This film works as a routine shoot 'em up action film. QUIET FIRE is pleasing but an often simplistic and plain diversion. This movie is not great by any means, but passable. QUIET FIRE is worth an overnight rental...assuming you have seen about every other action film ever made.

RATING: ** out of ****.