- Johnny Carson: Suppose a guy is out, and he's at a party - he's at a bar - and, and... somebody starts to - to slug him. What would you suggest he do? I mean...
- George Foreman: I suggest that he call the police.
- George Foreman: Eventually, I'd like to go back to college and get a degree, and that's much better than bein' the champ of the world.
- Steve Martin: In order to succeed in television, you have to appeal to everybody, you know. From the garbage collector, uh, right on down to the business executive.
- Steve Martin: The weird thing is - you have to sort of take this into account - if you're a human being, you won't get the jokes.
- Steve Martin: What's your sign, first of all?
- Johnny Carson: I'm a Scorpio.
- Steve Martin: Scorpio? See, I'm a Feces, so...
- Johnny Carson: I hate to ask what your rising sign is.