The Worst Witch (1986 TV Movie)
Fairuza Balk: Mildred Hubble
Photos
Quotes
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The Grand Wizard : Now, Mildred, have you made any plans for this unexpected holiday?
Mildred Hubble : No, Grand Wizard. I suppose I'd better practice my flying.
The Grand Wizard : Would you like to practice with me?
Mildred Hubble : With you?
The Grand Wizard : Oh, absolutely.
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Mildred Hubble : Maud?
Maud Warlock : Go to sleep, Mildred.
Mildred Hubble : I can't.
Maud Warlock : Why not?
Mildred Hubble : I'm afraid of the dark.
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Ethel Hallow : You sure you know how to play Terror Tag?
Mildred Hubble : Everyone knows how to play Terror Tag.
Ethel Hallow : You're not everyone.
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Mildred Hubble : Miss Hardbroom hates me.
Maud Warlock : Miss Hardbroom hates everyone.
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Mildred Hubble : Imagine kissing that.
Maud Warlock : Imagine kissing HB.
Miss Constance Hardbroom : [appearing from nowhere] Is that so?
[the girls shriek]
Miss Constance Hardbroom : I would think, after your disastrous performances today, you should be hardly be spreading disgusting gossip about matters which do not concern you.
Mildred Hubble : Yes, Miss Hardbroom.
Miss Constance Hardbroom : And you had both pay much more attention to your studies, if you ever hope to graduate from this institution. The finest's witching academy in the world.
Mildred Hubble , Maud Warlock : Yes, Miss Hardbroom!
Miss Constance Hardbroom : Now, go back to bed.
[they dive under the covers]
Miss Constance Hardbroom : Pleasant nightmares.
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[Mildred and Maud have accidentally made themselves invisble]
Miss Constance Hardbroom : Have you any idea what you did wrong Mildred?
Maud Warlock : It was my fault, Miss Hardbroom.
Mildred Hubble : No, it was my fault, Miss Hardbroom.
Miss Constance Hardbroom : I don't care whose fault it was. Sit still until you reappear!
Maud Warlock , Mildred Hubble : Yes, Miss Hardbroom.
Miss Constance Hardbroom : You Mildred Hubble, will go straight to Miss Cackle's office and explain exactly why you failed your potions test so miserably!
[claps her hands]
Miss Constance Hardbroom : Class dismissed.
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Miss Cackle : So Mildred, what can I do for you?
Mildred Hubble : Miss Hardbroom sent me.
Miss Cackle : Oh, dear. What happened this time?
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Maud Warlock : Go to sleep.
Mildred Hubble : I can't.
Maud Warlock : Why not?
Mildred Hubble : I'm afraid of the dark.
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Miss Cackle : Now, Mildred, what can I do for you?
Mildred Hubble : Miss Hardbroom sent me.
Miss Cackle : Oh, dear. What happened this time?
Mildred Hubble : I made the wrong potion.
Miss Cackle : And?
Mildred Hubble : Instead of laughing... I disappeared.
Miss Cackle : Oh dear, Mildred. Oh, dear, dear, dear. You must be the worst witch in the entire school. My words seem to go in one ear and out the other.
Mildred Hubble : I do try, Miss Cackle. It's just that everything always goes wrong.
Miss Cackle : I understand, dear, but you've got to apply yourself better. If you don't pass your first term exams you'll never get your witches junior certificate.
Mildred Hubble : I'll try harder.
Miss Cackle : Please do. I don't want to see you in here again.
Mildred Hubble : You won't.
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Maud Warlock : [At the lunchroom, Mildred and Maude are looking at a portrait of the Grand Wizard] Oh, I think I'm in love.
Mildred Hubble : He makes me feel all squishy inside.
[they giggle]
Mildred Hubble : Don't you ever worry that you're just not cut out to be a witch?
Maud Warlock : Oh, no. My family were all witches. I never doubted for a moment that I'd be one too. Stop worrying, it only makes things worse.
Mildred Hubble : I don't worry, I question. My mother always wanted to be a witch. But she didn't have the gift. It's not that I want to be the best. I'm just so tired of being the worst.
Ethel Hallow : Don't look so gloomy. You're doing fine, really you are.
[They sit at a table with Ethel and her friends]
Ethel Hallow : Oh look out girls, it's Mildred, the disaster area.
Maud Warlock : [to Mildred] Don't listen to her.
[to Ethel]
Maud Warlock : You shut up Ethel Hallow.
[Ethel and her friends laugh, then while Maude isn't looking Ethel throws a piece of bread into her water]
Maud Warlock : Who threw that?
Ethel Hallow : Mildred Hubble, you messy little witch. I've got a three year old brother who's neater than you.
Maud Warlock : Oh, shut up Ethel.
[to Mildred]
Maud Warlock : Do you want some more blood juice, Mil?
Mildred Hubble : Yes, please.
[Maude goes over to another table gets a pitcher of water and comes back. As she does Mildred gets up suddenly and bumps into her, knocking another girl off the bench and spilling water everywhere. Mildred looks down at the girl on the floor and the girl holds up a hand that looks like it's covered in blood]
Mildred Hubble : Oh my goodness! She's bleeding! Oh my goodness! She's bleeding, she's bleeding!
[Maude reaches for the end of the table and holds up an open container of ketchup. Mildred looks sheepish]
Ethel Hallow : Mildred Hubble, the disaster area.
[laughs; Pretty soon the entire lunchroom is laughing]
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Mildred Hubble : You cheated!
[All the other girls come out of hiding. The reds are excited that they won]
Maud Warlock : Mil, what's the matter?
Mildred Hubble : She cheated, she wore a mask.
Ethel Hallow : What mask?
[goes to stand with the other girls]
Ethel Hallow : Oh, you're such a bad loser.
Mildred Hubble : You better watch out, Ethel.
Ethel Hallow : Watch out? Is that a threat?
Mildred Hubble : You better shut up, or I'll... I'll...
Ethel Hallow : You'll what?
Mildred Hubble : Or I'll turn you into a frog.
Ethel Hallow : A frog? You... turn me...
[laughs, and the other girls on the red team join her]
Ethel Hallow : You don't even know the beginners spell's let alone one's like that. No, you're just like that ridiculous kitten of yours, a total misfit. Go on then, turn me into a frog, I dare you.
Maud Warlock : Come on, Mil, you can do it.
Ethel Hallow : What you waiting for, smarty pants?
Mildred Hubble : Munga Munga munga moose. Fingus, fingus, finga voo Mephastopholis Mrs. Magoo.
Ethel Hallow : What're you waiting for?
Mildred Hubble : Double trouble I'm not through. Um, tum, ugly face a goblin's peer.
Ethel Hallow : Pathetic.
-
[after Mildred falls down on the ground with her broomstick, stands up and sees Miss Hardbroom and Miss Cackle]
Mildred Hubble : Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't know how what happened.
Miss Constance Hardbroom : I was a fool to trust you. You abominable child, Mildred. Get out of my sight.
Mildred Hubble : I know what you're thinking.
Miss Cackle : You are to return to school at once. Go to bed without supper and I'll see you at my office tomorrow at noon. Please, go.
[Mildred leaves]