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Young Frankenstein (1974)
Gene Wilder: Dr. Frederick Frankenstein
Photos
Quotes
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Igor : You know, I'll never forget my old dad. When these things would happen to him... the things he'd say to me.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : What did he say?
Igor : "What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night? Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?"
-
[Froederick and Igor are exhuming a dead criminal]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : What a filthy job.
Igor : Could be worse.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : How?
Igor : Could be raining.
[it starts to pour]
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Igor : Dr. Frankenstein...
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : "Fronkensteen."
Igor : You're putting me on.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No, it's pronounced "Fronkensteen."
Igor : Do you also say "Froaderick"?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No... "Frederick."
Igor : Well, why isn't it "Froaderick Fronkensteen"?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : It isn't; it's "Frederick Fronkensteen."
Igor : I see.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : You must be Igor.
[He pronounces it ee-gor]
Igor : No, it's pronounced "eye-gor."
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : But they told me it was "ee-gor."
Igor : Well, they were wrong then, weren't they?
-
Igor : What is this?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Schwartzwalder Kirschtorte.
The Monster : [off-screen] MMMMMMM!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Oh, do you like it? I'm not partial to desserts myself, but this is excellent.
Igor : Who are you talking to?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : To you. You just made a yummy sound, so I thought you liked the dessert.
Igor : I didn't make a yummy sound, I just asked you what it is.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : But you did. I just heard it.
Igor : It wasn't me.
Inga : It wasn't me.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Well, now look here. If it wasn't you, and it wasn't you...
[he asks himself]
The Monster : [off-camera] Mmmmmm!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Reading from his grandfathers' notebook] "As the minuteness of the parts formed a great hinderance to my speed, I resolved therefore to make a being of a gigantic stature."
[pause]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Of course. That would simplify everything.
Inga : In other vords: his veins, his feet, his hands, his organs vould all have to be increased in size.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Exactly.
Inga : He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : That goes without saying.
Inga : Voof.
Igor : He's going to be very popular.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : You know, I'm a rather brilliant surgeon. Perhaps I can help you with that hump.
Igor : What hump?
-
Inga : Werewolf!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Werewolf?
Igor : There.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : What?
Igor : There, wolf. There, castle.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Why are you talking that way?
Igor : I thought you wanted to.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No, I don't want to.
Igor : [shrugs] Suit yourself. I'm easy.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [to Inga from behind the bookcase] Put... the candle... back!
-
[last lines]
Inga : You know, there's something I've been meaning to ask you. In the transference, the monster got part of your wonderful brain. But what did you ever get from him?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [growls suggestively]
Inga : [gasping] Oh my goodness, I don't believe...
[emits several somewhat painful-sounding moans and grunts]
Inga : [singing] Oh, sweet mystery of life, at last I've found you!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [to Igor] Now that brain that you gave me. Was it Hans Delbruck's?
Igor : [pause, then] No.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Ah! Very good. Would you mind telling me whose brain I DID put in?
Igor : Then you won't be angry?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I will NOT be angry.
Igor : Abby someone.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [pause, then] Abby someone. Abby who?
Igor : Abby... Normal.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [pause, then] Abby Normal?
Igor : I'm almost sure that was the name.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [chuckles, then] Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into a seven and a half foot long, fifty-four inch wide GORILLA?
[grabs Igor and starts throttling him]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Is that what you're telling me?
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Igor, help me with the bags.
Igor : [Imitating Groucho Marx] Soitenly. You take the blonde, I'll take the one in the toiben.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I was talking about the luggage.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Love is the only thing that can save this poor creature, and I am going to convince him that he is loved even at the cost of my own life. No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for. Do you understand? Do not open this door.
Inga : Yes, Doctor.
Igor : Nice working with ya.
[Dr. Frederick Frankenstein goes into the room with The Monster. The Monster wakes up]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. What's the matter with you people? I was joking! Don't you know a joke when you hear one? HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here! Open this goddamn door or I'll kick your rotten heads in! Mommy!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Well, dear, are you ready?
Inga : Yes, Doctor.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Elevate me.
Inga : Now? Right here?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Yes, yes, raise the platform.
Inga : Oh. Ze platform. Oh, zat, yah, yah... yes.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [to The Monster] Hello handsome. You're a good looking fellow, do you know that? People laugh at you, people hate you, but why do they hate you? Because... they are jealous. Look at that boyish face. Look at that sweet smile. Do you wanna talk about physical strength? Do you want to talk about sheer muscle? Do you want to talk about the Olympian ideal? You are a God. And listen to me, you are not evil. You... are... good.
[the Monster starts to cry, and Dr. Frederick Frankenstein hugs him]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : This is a nice boy. This is a good boy. This is a mother's angel. And I want the world to know once and for all, and without any shame, that we love him. I'm going to teach you. I'm going to show you how to walk, how to speak, how to move, how to think. Together, you and I are going to make the greatest single contribution to science since the creation of fire.
Inga : [from outside] Dr. Fronkensteen! Are you all right!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : MY NAME IS FRANKENSTEIN!
-
[Frederick, Inga and Igor find an abandoned violin]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Well this explains the music.
Igor : It's still warm.
-
[Frankenstein, Igor and Inga in front of HUGE castle doors]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : What knockers.
Inga : Oh, thank you doctor.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : That music...
Frau Blücher : Yes. It's in your blood - it's in the blood of ALL Frankensteins. It reaches the soul when words are useless. Your grandfather used to play it to the creature HE vas making.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Then it was you all the time.
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : You played that music in the middle of the night...
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : ...to get us to the laboratory.
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : That was YOUR cigar smoldering in the ashtray.
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : And it was you... who left my grandfather's book out for me to find.
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : So that I would...
Frau Blücher : Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Then you and Victor were...
Frau Blücher : YES. YES. Say it. He vas my... BOYFRIEND.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : From that fateful day when stinking bits of slime first crawled from the sea and shouted to the cold stars, "I am man.", our greatest dread has always been the knowledge of our mortality. But tonight, we shall hurl the gauntlet of science into the frightful face of death itself. Tonight, we shall ascend into the heavens. We shall mock the earthquake. We shall command the thunders, and penetrate into the very womb of impervious nature herself.
-
Frau Blücher : Good night, Herr Doktor.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Good night, Frau Blücher.
[horses whinny]
-
[after failing to bring the creature to life]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Nothing.
Inga : Oh, Doctor, I'm sorry.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No. No. Be of good cheer. If science teaches us anything, it teaches us to accept our failures, as well as our successes, with quiet dignity and grace.
[starts beating up the creature]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Son of a bitch! Bastard! I'll get you for this! What did you do to me? What did you do to me.
Inga : Stop it! Stop that! Stop it! You'll kill him!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I don't want to live. I do not want to live.
Igor : Quiet dignity and grace
[rolls eyes]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Oh... mama...
-
Inga : You haven't even touched your food.
[Frederick explodes and slaps on his food]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : There. Now I've touched it. Happy?
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Damn your eyes.
Igor : [to camera] Too late.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Are you ready?
Igor : Are you sure this is how they did it?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Yes! It's all written down in the notes! Now tie off the kites and hurry down as fast as you can!
Igor : What's the hurry?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : There's a possibility of electrocution! Do you understand?
[no answer, shouts]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I said, there is a possibility of electrocution! Do you understand?
Igor : [suddenly appears next to Fredrick] I understand. I understand. Why are you shouting?
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Uh, you were sent by Herr Falkstein, weren't you?
Igor : Yes. My grandfather used to work for your grandfather.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Nervous laughter] How nice.
Igor : Of course the rates have gone up.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Of course, of course. I'm sure we'll get along splendidly.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [dreaming] I am not a Frankenstein. I'm a Fronkensteen. Don't give me that. I don't believe in fate. And I won't say it.
[pauses]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : All right, you win. You win. I give. I'll say it. I'll say it. I'll say it. DESTINY! DESTINY! NO ESCAPING THAT FOR ME! DESTINY! DESTINY! NO ESCAPING THAT FOR ME!
-
Frau Blücher : Would the doctor care for a... brandy before retiring?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No. Thank you.
Frau Blücher : [suggestively] Some varm milk... perhaps?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No... thank you very much. No thanks.
Frau Blücher : [suggestively] Ovaltine?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : NOTHING! Thank you! I'm a little - tired!
Frau Blücher : Then I vill say... goodnight, Herr Doctor.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Goodnight, Frau Blücher.
[horses whinny]
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I am a scientist, not a philosopher! You have more chance of reanimating this scalpel than you have of mending a broken nervous system!
Medical Student : But what about your grandfather's work, sir?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My grandfather's work was doodoo! I am not interested in death! The only thing that concerns me is the preservation of life!
[jams the scalpel into his leg, lets go of the scalpel and it sticks upright out of his leg, grasps it again, then slowly crosses his legs to block the scalpel from view]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Class... is... dismissed.
-
[following Igor's botched attempt to interpret Dr. Frankenstein's charade clues while being attacked by the monster]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : SEDA-GIVE?
-
[Frederick arrives at the Transylvania station]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Pardon me, boy. Is this the Transylvania station?
Shoe-Shine Boy : Ja, ja. Track 29. Can I give you a shine?
-
[Frau Blucher has just "walked in" on Frederick and Inga in the lab]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : I thought I told you never to interrupt me while I'm working!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : With such a specimen for a body, all we need now is an equally magnificant brain. You know what to do?
Igor : I have a pretty good idea.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [pointing to Igor's hump] Good man. Didn't you, didn't you use to have that on the other side?
Igor : What?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Your, uh, oh nevermind.
-
Frau Blücher : I came to tell you that your fiance should be arriving any second!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [shirtless] Elizabeth! Here, tonight?
Frau Blücher : I suggest you put on a tie!
-
Medical Student : Isn't it true that Darwin preserved a piece of vermicelli in a glass case until, by some extrordinary means, it actually began to move with voluntary motion?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Are you speaking of the worm or the spaghetti?
[the class laughs]
Medical Student : Why, the worm, sir.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Yes, I did read something of that incident when I was a student, but you have to remember that a worm... with very few exceptions... is not a human being.
Medical Student : But wasn't that the whole basis of your grandfather's work? The reanimation of dead tissue?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My grandfather was a very sick man.
Medical Student : But as a Fronkensteen, aren't you the least bit curious about it? Doesn't the bringing back to life what was once dead hold any intrigue to you?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : You are talking about the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind! Dead is dead!
Medical Student : But look at what has been done with hearts and kidneys...
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Hearts and kidneys are tinker toys! I am talking about the central nervous system!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : STAND BACK, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! HE'S GOT A ROTTEN BRAIN!
Frau Blücher : It's not rotten! It's a good brain!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : IT'S ROTTEN, I TELL YOU! ROTTEN!
The Monster : [lunging at Dr. Frankenstein] RRAAAAAAAA!
Igor : Ixnay on the ottenray.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : For what we are about to see next, we must enter quietly into the realm of genius.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Sit down, won't you?
[Igor sits on the floor]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : No, no, up here.
[Igor gets up onto a stool]
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Please! Remain in your seats, I beg you! We are not children here, we are scientists! I assure you there is nothing to fear!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [singing] If you're blue, and you don't know where to go to, why don't you go where fashion sits...
The Monster : 'UTTIN' ON THE 'IIIIITZ.
-
[Dr. Frankenstein leans in for a kiss]
Elizabeth : Taffeta, darling.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Taffeta, sweetheart.
Elizabeth : [pulling away] No, the dress is taffeta. It wrinkles so easily.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Eyegor.
Igor : Froadrick.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [after reading his grandfather's notes] IT... COULD... WORK!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Nice hopping.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Throw... the third switch!
Igor : [shocked] Not the *third switch*!
-
Elizabeth : Freddy, darling, how can I say in a few minutes what it's taken me a lifetime to understand?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Won't you try?
Elizabeth : All right... You've got it, mister!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Gone! Gone! We've got to find him, you understand? We've got to find him before he kills someone! What have I done? Oh God in Heaven! What have I done?
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My fellow scienti...
Audience : Ssssssssssssssss!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : ...tists - and neurosurgeons, ladies and gentlemen. A few short weeks ago, coming from a background, believe me, as conservative and traditionally grounded in scientific fact as any of you, I began an experiment in, incredulous as it may sound, the reanimation of dead tissue.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Have all the preperations been made for the transference?
Inga : Yes, doctor.
Igor : Are you sure you want to go through with this?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : It's the only thing that can save him now.
Igor : You realize you're risking both your lives?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [plays a sour note] Yes.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Life! Life, do you hear me? Give my creation LIIIFEEE!
-
Igor : Where are you going?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : To wash up. I've got to look normal.
[his bowtie pops open]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : We've all of us got to behave normally.
-
[first lines]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : If we look at the base of a brain, which has just been removed from the skull, there's very little of the mid-brain that we can actually see. Yet, as I demonstrated in my lecture last week, if the under aspects of the temporal lobes are gently pulled apart, the upper portion of the stem of the brain can be seen. The so-called "brain stem" consists of the mid-brain, a rounded protrusion called the pons, and a stalk tapering downwards called the medulla oblongata, which passes out of the skull through the foramen magnum, and becomes, of course, the spinal cord. Are there any questions before we proceed?
Medical Student : I have one question, Dr. Frankenstein.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : That's "Fronkensteen".
Medical Student : I beg your pardon?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My name; it's pronounced "Fronkensteen".
Medical Student : But aren't you the grandson of the famous Dr. Victor Frankenstein who went into graveyards, dug up freshly buried corpses, and transformed dead components into...?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Yes! Yes, yes! We all know what he did; but I'd rather be remembered for my own small contributions to science, and not because of my accidental relationship... to a famous... cuckoo.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [the medical students laugh] Now if you don't mind, can we get on with your question?
Medical Student : Well, sir, I'm not sure I understand the distinction between reflexive and voluntary nerve impulses.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Very good. Since our lab work today is a demonstration of just that distinction, why don't we proceed?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Dr. Frankenstein rings a small desktop gong and two lab assistants wheel in an elderly man on a gurney] Mr. Hilltop here - with whom I have never worked, nor given any prior instructions to - has graciously offered his services for this afternoon's demonstration. Mr. Hilltop, would you hop up on your feet and stand beside this table?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Mr. Hilltop slowly steps down from the gurney] Nice hopping. Mr. Hilltop, would you raise your left knee, please?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Mr. Hilltop slowly raises his left knee] You have just witnessed a voluntary nerve impulse. It begins as a stimulus from the cerebral cortex, passes through the brain stem and to the particular muscles involved. Mr. Hilltop, you may lower your knee.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [Mr. Hilltop lowers his left knee] Reflex movements are those which are made independently of the will, but are carried out along pathways which pass between the peripheral nervous system and the central nervous system.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : You fithy, rotten yellow son of a bitch!
[Dr. Frankenstein puts his hand on Mr. Hilltop's right shoulder and hits Mr. Hilltop's left thigh with his left knee; the students gasp at Mr. Hilltop's involuntarily winces from Dr. Frankenstein's sudden move]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : We are not aware of these impulses, neither do we intend them to carry out our contraction of muscles; yet as you can see, they work by themselves. But what if we block the nerve impulse by simply applying local pressure? Which can be done with any ordinary metal clamp just at the swelling, on the posterior nerve roots... for oh say, five or six seconds.
[Dr. Frankenstein puts the clamp on the back of Hilltop's neck and looks at his watch for a few seconds]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Why, you mother-grabbing bastard!
[Dr. Frankenstein gives Hilltop another knee hit to his left thigh, but this time he makes no involuntary reaction and is still standing up]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : As you can see, all communication is shut off.
Mr. Hilltop : [whimpers in pain]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : In spite of our mechanical magnificence, if it were not for this continuous stream... of motor impulses, we would collapse like a bunch of broccoli!
Mr. Hilltop : [Dr. Frankenstein removes the clamp from Hilltop's neck; Hilltop faints and moans while the students applaud] Ohh, ohh!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : In conclusion, it should be noted...
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [whispers to the intern] Give him an extra dollar.
Orderly in Frankenstein's Class : [whispers to Dr. Frankenstein] An extra dollar, yes sir.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : That any more than common injury to the nerve root is always serious.
Mr. Hilltop : [Mr. Hilltop is carried out on a gurney] Ohh, ohh, ohhh!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Because once a nerve fiber is severed, there is no way in heaven or on earth to regenerate life back into it.
-
[in Victor Frankenstein's laboratory]
Igor : [sings] I ain't got no body, and nobody cares for me. Yakka tak ta a yakka tak ta ha!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Igor.
Igor : Froedrick.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : How did you get here?
Igor : Through the dumbwaiter.
-
[after he brings the creature to life]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Alive! It's alive! It's alive!
-
Inga : Hold on to your hat! I'll be right back.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [literally holds onto his hat] I'm holding onto it, Darling!
Inga : Just a few more seconds.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Well it seems as if our mysterious violinist has disa...
[sees something]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : puh.
Inga : Disa what?
Igor : -ppeared.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Shh.
-
Elizabeth : How do you do?
Elizabeth : [turns in Igor's direction to speak, changes her mind, then looks back to Inga] How do you do?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Uh, this is my financier, Elizabeth.
Inga : Oh, I'm so happy to meet you at last!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My fi-nan-ce...
Elizabeth : Excuse me darling, what is exactly that you do do?
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : My grandfather... was a very... SICK... man.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : [During game of darts, the Inspector has made it appear that he has thrown all bullseyes, while Dr. Frankenstein's back was turned] Nice grouping!
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : But you have to remember that a worm, with very few exceptions, is not a human being.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Don't be frightened, dear. It's just a rat - a filthy, slimy rat.
-
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein : Please, I beg you! For safety's sake, don't humiliate him!