Well... this is a novel idea! Take a bunch of beloved kids characters and turn them into slasher villains! Bring it on!
Blood & Honey follows Christopher Robin, as he returns to his childhood home. Growing up with Pooh, Piglet and Eeyore, he eventually left to go to university, and now years later has returned to introduce his girlffiend to his childhood friends. Thing is, the gang were not able to fend for themselves, and ended up eating Eeyore just to stay alive. Growing to resent Christopher for leaving them and having to kill their friend to survive, Pooh and Piglet are now somewhat unhinged and very, very murderous...
This film was utterly decimated by critics upon release, but I wasn't put off as cheap shlocky horror movies never go down well with critics. I was completely on board with this concept and more than a little curious so I decided to check it out.
I really wanted to like this film, but boy does it make that difficult. I actually laughed out loud at how absolutely AWFUL the dialogue is. If you ever watch it, just listen to the lines Chris Robin's girlfriend says at the beginning! Who even talks like that!!!!? And it's not just her, nobody in this film talks like a real person. Yes, this film isn't the only one that suffers from bad dialogue, but DAMN... it's really jarring...
That aside, the film seems to be going for your typical Texas Chainsaw vibes... and Pooh and Piglet are so typecast as psychotic hillbillies that they could easily just be generic humans and it wouldn't matter. The fact that they are humanoid pigs and bears doesn't really serve much purpose in the film itself beyond the initial set up. They just look like humans wearing masks (which with a budget this low is probably exactly what they are).
Some pretty grim kills aside, this film doesn't really do anything that a billion other slasher movies haven't already done much better. The characters are all unlikable and have zero depth, the location is cliche and everyone is either dumb, annoying or both - including the killers. Amazingly, this film somehow got a sequel that is allegedly much better. Well... it can't be much worse...
Blood & Honey follows Christopher Robin, as he returns to his childhood home. Growing up with Pooh, Piglet and Eeyore, he eventually left to go to university, and now years later has returned to introduce his girlffiend to his childhood friends. Thing is, the gang were not able to fend for themselves, and ended up eating Eeyore just to stay alive. Growing to resent Christopher for leaving them and having to kill their friend to survive, Pooh and Piglet are now somewhat unhinged and very, very murderous...
This film was utterly decimated by critics upon release, but I wasn't put off as cheap shlocky horror movies never go down well with critics. I was completely on board with this concept and more than a little curious so I decided to check it out.
I really wanted to like this film, but boy does it make that difficult. I actually laughed out loud at how absolutely AWFUL the dialogue is. If you ever watch it, just listen to the lines Chris Robin's girlfriend says at the beginning! Who even talks like that!!!!? And it's not just her, nobody in this film talks like a real person. Yes, this film isn't the only one that suffers from bad dialogue, but DAMN... it's really jarring...
That aside, the film seems to be going for your typical Texas Chainsaw vibes... and Pooh and Piglet are so typecast as psychotic hillbillies that they could easily just be generic humans and it wouldn't matter. The fact that they are humanoid pigs and bears doesn't really serve much purpose in the film itself beyond the initial set up. They just look like humans wearing masks (which with a budget this low is probably exactly what they are).
Some pretty grim kills aside, this film doesn't really do anything that a billion other slasher movies haven't already done much better. The characters are all unlikable and have zero depth, the location is cliche and everyone is either dumb, annoying or both - including the killers. Amazingly, this film somehow got a sequel that is allegedly much better. Well... it can't be much worse...