- Jesse Cochran: Danny, this kid has been walking for three days and you haven't stopped taping her. I'll feel sorry for her when she starts potty training.
- Jesse Cochran: Oh, this is so boring catching fish... after fish... after fish...
- Danny Tanner: Will you shut up?
- Danny Tanner: Oh great, my bait is yawning.
- [slaps minnow]
- Danny Tanner: Wake up! Would you wake up please?
- Caroline: Danny, is something wrong?
- Danny Tanner: Where's the scuba gear? There's something sinister going on down there.
- Caroline: You think the fish have gotten together and made a group decision to avoid your hook?
- Danny Tanner: It's the only logical explanation.
- Joey Gladstone: Hey, I know how that feels. It's like when I see Alf, I go nuts. I'm doing my standup in little nightclubs, and a carpet sample has a series.
- Jesse Cochran: [Chokes Joey's neck with the telephone cord] Say bye.
- Joey Gladstone: [In a high-pitched voice] Goodbye.
- Jesse Cochran: [On the telephone] Hello. Oh I'm sorry, that was Joey. He was raised by a family of really stupid wolves.