Cheaper by the Dozen 2 (2005)
Steve Martin: Tom Baker
Photos
Quotes
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[from trailer]
Kate 'Mom' Baker : Honey you actually bought that shirt?
Tom Baker : Hey every dad is entitled to one hideous shirt, and one horrible sweater. It's part of the dad code.
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Lorraine Baker : You know how I feel about camping.
Tom Baker : But, we're staying in a house.
Lorraine Baker : A house with no air conditioning. That makes it camping.
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Lorraine Baker : Still smells the same. Old gross stuff, dead animals, and murky lake water.
Tom Baker : It's called fresh air sweetie.
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[from trailer]
Tom Baker : That's not gonna fit in your tent, Lorraine.
Lorraine Baker : Oh, I'm gonna make it fit, Dad!
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Nigel Baker : Winnetka? That's my middle name.
Kyle Baker : And Lake is mine.
Tom Baker : That's because you were conceived there.
Nigel Baker : What's that mean?
Jessica Baker : It means mom and dad had...
Kate 'Mom' Baker : ...a conversation, that we would discuss it much later when everybody could understand!
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Tom Baker : [to his newborn grandson] Tom. Hey, Tom. Welcome to family.
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Tom Baker : [Getting tickets] One please.
Tom Baker : [Goes inside the theater and runs into Jimmy] What are you doing here?
Jimmy Murtaugh : Well, if you must know, I'm still here to make sure this movie is appropriate for our children.
Tom Baker : It's rated G.
Theatre Patron : [to Tom] Shh.
Old Lay in Theater : Shh.
Kid in Theater : [to Tom] Sir, could you please sit down?
Tom Baker : [Whispers] Yeah.
Jimmy Murtaugh : What are you doing here so early?
Tom Baker : Father of the daughter always arrives early for pickup duty, everybody knows that.
Security Guard : [Waves his flashlight at Tom and Jimmy] Excuse me... . is there a problem here?
Jimmy Murtaugh : Yes, this man's harassing me.
Tom Baker : This man's guilty of overparenting.
Security Guard : If you 2 can't keep it down, I'm gonna throw both of you out.
Jimmy Murtaugh : [He and Tom both see Sarah and Eliot down through the balcony and attempt to be nosy] What, he's stretching.
Tom Baker : He's doing the move.
Jimmy Murtaugh : What move?
Tom Baker : [Scoots Jimmy back] You sit in the theater. You fake a yaaaaawn... . oh boy, am I tired? Hand comes over. Then a little while later, head comes over giving an extra reach there, right?
Theatre Patron : [Grinning as she sees Tom and Jimmy] Mom, look... .. those 2 down there.
Tom Baker : See what I mean?
Old Lay in Theater : Oh, sweet Jesus.
Security Guard : [Waves flashlight again at them] Warning number 2.
Jimmy Murtaugh : He was showing me the move. Do you mind?
Tom Baker : [Places his hand off Jimmy's shoulder] You don't know the move?
Jimmy Murtaugh : No, I don't know the move! I wasn't a hormone crazed romeo when I was a kid! I am self-control, I am social sophistication!
Old Lay in Theater : Psst... be quiet down there!
Tom Baker : Your son has raging hormones like every other male teenager.
Jimmy Murtaugh : Meaning what?
Tom Baker : Meaning on a sophistication scale, that's 1 step above ape.
Jimmy Murtaugh : Are you calling my son an ape?
Tom Baker : He's an ape like every other male teenager.
Jimmy Murtaugh : Take it back! Take it! Take it back.
Tom Baker : Were you gonna poke me?
Jimmy Murtaugh : Because you were asking for it!
Tom Baker : [He and Jimmy stand up, blocking the theater screen. Everybody furiously tells them to sit down] Well if I'm asking for it, why don't you give me 2? Come on, give me a poke!