halt stop forget relax

I am so glad that my MIL came down to visit us several weeks ago. Since the divorce  of one of her sons a few years ago, and half of the family moved to Nevada, we stopped having holiday meals together. And due to  all of her 'phobias' she wouldn't ride on the freeway. This time, however, her grandson, who had been visiting every other month or so insisted that he drive her to see both us, and her daughter who lives fairly close to  us. You see, she was diagnosed with inoperable esophageal cancer several months ago, and was told by her doctor to "get her affairs in order." That is what her grandson was helping her to do. When I saw her in the house she looked good, though she had started to lose weight in that way the very old do, as their bodies begin to shut down. But her voice was perky as ever, as she and DH talked of this and that, and as they went over some of the things she brought that she thought he might want. Then she decided to take us to lunch, and...

Merry Christmas to all. I have been awake since 1 AM, as I slept most of yesterday. I don't feel sleepy right now. I am having my second latte of the day, but no matter, I have been known to fall asleep while drinking one. I don't think I am very sensitive to caffeine. I will take a shower before bed, and try to get to sleep at a decent time this evening. DH's alarm is going off right now. We'll see how long he sleeps in today. I jusst finished making cookies, but I need help getting them in and out of the oven without burning myself. Sitting in the walker puts me in an awkward position, so... I'll just wait for him to get up and awake before I (we) start baking them. He'll love me for it, I'm sure. I'm listening to Pandora; I have a rotation of a variety of instrumental Christmas music playing quietly. We just got a phone call from my niece that DH's sister is in the hospital. She is the one with COPD and asthma. I guess we will be visiting he...

I want to set the record straight. After another discussion, DH said he would get the RTS ready for me to take to the dinner, and he did. It turns out that neither my friend nor I needed to use it, but you know what I say about that - It's better to have it, and not need it, than to need it, and not have it. I did feel much better just knowing that it was there.  Thanks dear. Oh, and I received a lovely aubergine cape (purple, to the plebeians) to wear, because my Secret Santa knows that I am ALWAYS cold. It's lovely. It's acrylic - but acrylic is warmer than cotton, and I am sensitive to wool. I  also got some nice beaded earrings. And a glass hummingbird that's hanging in my kitchen window. And tonight, though my computer says it's a chilly 32 degrees outside, our newly calibrated thermometer on the garage says it's a much chillier 23.  BRRRRRRRRR. Clear skies are to blame, but no snow like we had a few days ago (just a smidge - but a pretty smidge ...

It is a dark and stormy night. We have a nice one-note brass bell that we found at Lowe's several years ago in their damaged/quick sale bin. It didn't have it's clanger connected, and it's hangar was missing, and they still wanted $14.88 or something for it. DH was going to buy it, but I told him to haggle, as it wasn't worth anything as is. So we asked a salesman who, of course, had no authority and referred us to a manager, who, of course was busy elsewhere in the store. But we weren't in any hurry so I sat and waited while DH went browsing. When the manager finally arrived, I told him what I thought of the marked price and hoped he could do better for us, and he marked it down to something like $3.59. For a solid brass bell that has a lovely peal. DH, being the handy sort, was able to reassemble the bell, and he hung it up on the corner of our garage in the back yard. It rings when ever the wind blows more than about 10 mph. Tonight, it is clanging away. I...

I have a favorite Christmas song. It's not a carol, it is even a protest song of sorts, but one that is upbeat as well,   and makes me smile every year.  I am certain you will recognise it, but if not I am happy to introduce it to you. As you will see, I have been Googling a lot this evening. First let's meet the writer, Jona  Lewie, via a Ch. 4 reporter.                Now, sit back and watch and listen to his version of the song as he sang it in 1990.  and maybe, just maybe, if you like it as much as I do,  you will have a listen to the version by the Cory Band that I heard and sang to, although DH and I got about 30% of the words wrong.  [This link doesn't have a video, just audio and a photo.] Remember, we all didn't have Google back in the mid-1980's to find these things.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. This year I can sing it with the correct words. Yay, me! Stop the Cavalry...

Okay, so I am up at night anyway... tonight I'm watching Home Alone - whatever the franchise is calling it. It is overacted, and the kid will never be as famous as Macauley Culkin (sp?). Anyway. I decided to balance my check book because it was on my list of things to do today, along with eat some oatmeal, which I didn't, and carrots, also didn't, but I did take a shower. So here I am listening to this dumb semi-holiday movie at three a.m. and working on the checkbook, and I come out with a balance that is about $7 off to my favor plus my monthly budget.  Ladies and gentlemen, I am scraping the bottom of the barrel. I have so little cushion it makes me nervous. Add to that, not only does our garage roof leak, but the house roof is leaking too! It started again in the bathroom during a squall that passed through this evening - and this with a tarp up there. October it was the car that spent 10 days at car camp, last week it was the microwave that stopped working afte...

I saw my neurologist yesterday and the results of my exam were that nothing had changed, except that I am walking slower, but that could also be attributed to the minor modification DH made to my walker - he moved the back wheels from the outside to the inside so it would fit through the bathroom door. That's a good thing, but it also means that I bump into the wheel with my left foot when I try to walk a little faster, which is frustrating. I am thinking of having him change them back, at least until we need a means to transport me into the bathroom. Right now I can get in there on my own with the three wheel walker (with NO seat) just fine. No changes in my meds. Still on the Copaxone (DMD), baclofen (spasticity), zoloft (depression), diazepam (spasms at night), temazepam (to sleep), ritalin (to stay alert), and vitamin D (apparently good for MS - who knew?). The good news is that BG12 should be available sometime in March. There is some sort of back-log with the powers that be...

And here I sit at my computer, an aging laptop whose keys don't ll work, like that missing 'a' just there. That is one of the reasons I haven't written much lately. I'm a perfectionist and that is one of my strengths, but also one of my greater weaknesses. It couples well with procrastination,   don't you think? It may be the source of my procrastination, well, strike that - it IS the source of my procrastination. I don't just want to write some slop, some drivel, so I wait until I have something to say, and then I never do ... hve something to say. Just so you know, I am not going to go back to fix the errant a's that didn't type out. And I am going to do a stream of consciousness post, as most of them are, because I post out of guilt that I haven't posted in so long. So blah blah blah. ***** [where the eff is paragraph style???] I have been so very lazy lately (the past many months) that I haven't really done much of anything. I hav...

We have harvested the pears from our tree. They are Bosc, and they are ripening fast. Several months ago I tore a recipe from a magazine for a pear tart, only to find out that I don't have a tart pan. I know I used to have a tart pan - either one of my own or one I used at my Mom's. (She's been gone for nearly 12 years now!) So I have to figure out whether I should just try using a pie plate instead, and butter it well, or just find a different recipe. But the real problem is - I just don't feel like baking anything. And these pears are ripening FAST. Sigh. We made it to Trader Joe's yesterday, for a month's worth of coffee. We were down to reserves. Came out of the store $120 lighter. Funny how 'just a few things' adds up so quickly. DH is going to make some vegetable bean soup later and the recipe he selected called for leeks. Two leeks at the store were 1.64#s @$1.99/# which came to $3.24. At Trader Joes 24 oz. frozen leeks came to   $2.98. A lot o...

For those  who are interested, here's the recipe. It takes hardly any time at all. Chocolate Cherry Bombs 1/3 cup boiling water 1 3 oz. Pkg. Cherry Jello 1 5 oz. can evaporated (not condensed) milk 2 squares semi-sweet chocolate 1. Add the boiling water to the jello and stir until dissolved. Or, as I did, put the H20 into a 1 cup pyrex measuring cup and microwave for 1 minute, then add the Jello and stir. 2. Measure 5 oz. evap. milk into a 2 cup Pyrex cup , chop the chocolate squares into four pieces each and put in the cup. Place into the microwave for one minute, stir. Put back into the microwave for another minute, stir or whisk until smooth. 3. Add the Jello to the chocolate and whisk together. Pour a cupcake tin that has been sprayed with Pam, or, as I did, pour into a decorative muffin tin that has been sprayed. Better yet, put into a mini muffin tin, which I don't have, but which would be perfect for this. The size of a cupcake is a tad too big, in my opinio...

...and it's not just my sleep schedule, though I think that may indeed be most of it. The thing is, I just can't afford to see the sleep specialist at $35 a pop. She tells me to take melatonin and go to bed at  certain time, and if I can't fall asleep in 20 minutes to get out of bed and go do some quiet activity like reading, or zentangle until I feel sleepy again, and lather, rinse, repeat. Then when it's time to get up in the morning, after seven hours of sleep to get up and put my feet on the floor - no sitting up in the bed - and get up and dressed. If I need to take a nap, don't let it be longer than 30 minutes. God, it all sounds so simple, but the reality is that is is nigh impossible for me to do it. So, Thursday the 11th, I went to bed at 6:30 AM, and woke up at 12:30 PM. I decided that six hours wasn't enough sleep, so I fell back to  sleep. I woke again around 2:30 PM, and then I just felt lazy, and depressed, and rolled over again. And again. And a...

I know I am not the first one to mention this, but I really don't like the "new" Blogger interface. I have gone through it, and I changed my background to one more seasonal, and it was a pain in the ass. Just enough different to make it a frustrating experience for me. Oh well, it's done for now. I just started watching the series "Switched at Birth" which airs on the Family Channel, though I am streaming it on TUBE+. I went back to start with episode one, and I have to say that I am enjoying it. I  know, I watch too much TV - but since I got these no-line bifocals I find that reading gives me a headache. Between dog and husband it seems they are always needing to be readjusted, and it's not getting done. So I end up watching TV or listening to books or NPR streams instead. When I am listening, I do Zentangle at the same time; that, or play computer games. I lead such an exciting life. I made a salad and it turned out pretty well. Broccoli, Cauliflow...

I really must apologise. Again, I posted late and did not proof my work (if you could call it that). Typos slipped through and the whole thing just needed to be fleshed out. Whole paragraphs are missing. I never used to write this poorly. Swear to God. I'm going to let it stand. Sorry,

Things. I want things. More things than I already have. Enough things that would make me feel secure in letting go of some of the things I already own, but no longer use. They can be small things or large things but they all have one thing in common --  they are our of my reach. So I yearn for things. In the interest of truth, they are not all out of my reach. But even if I were to buy them, it is certainly not prudent for me to purchase them. Things that are consumable, like a cup of Starbuck's coffee fall into this category. Or an ice cream bar, like the coffee ice cream  coated with chocolate and toffee that I had the last time I went up to the Bargain Market on my scooter ... on the way to the Starbuck's next door. The coffee was "free" because I bought it with a gift card. I love gift cards. And the ice cream bar was a spontaneous purchase; after all it was only $1. Just a buck. It tasted just like the Dove bars and Haagen Dazs bars that cost three times a...

Creepy things, that's what. Dark things. Things that make you feel dirty. Shows like Dexter. I like Michael C Hall, and I think he plays Dexter extremely well, so well, in fact, that I think it's a shame that he hasn't been taking home the Emmy for it each year that he's been nominated. But, let's face it - murder is what he does, and he shows you things that one ought not see. I had heard some buzz about the books years ago. I think there were three out at the time, so I checked out the first one from the library and was thoroughly mesmerized by it, but when I was done, I felt -- creeped out. I didn't want that stuff playing about in my brain. I decided not to read the other books. Then, when Dexter became a TV show, I watched it, and I  felt the same way. So I haven't kept up with the series for that reason alone. So why did I just watch the last episode on my computer? Did I think it would he different somehow? Not really. And it wasn't. And I pr...

The girls and I had lunch today at Boathouse 19 in University Place. It is located at the Narrows Marina at the foot of 19th street West and is a nice new waterfront restaurant that won't split open the pocketbook. No wonder the outdoor deck was packed at Noon. I, and two others at my table had the cranberry turkey sandwich with cajun fries, one other had the Carolina pulled pork, and the last had a N'awlins shrimp Po'boy. Our only unhappy camper was the person with the pulled pork. Seems like they failed to pull the meat from the fat, as she had quite the pile of fat slid over to the side of her plate before she was done. Can we all agree on, "YUCK?"  That aside we each would go there again. I also got a dessert to go: the Lemon Cheesecake Jar (without the jar) , which I put in the 'fridge until just a few minutes ago, and can I tell you something?    It was sooo gooo-oood. Yeah. Lemon Curd rocks.  Google Boathouse 19 University Place WA for a copy of the m...

  This is Diane, me, and Gretchen flippin' the bird at MS. Note who's smilin' while flippin'. (LOL)

As I write this... DH is at the auto parts store getting a throttle position sensor for the OLDsmobile; he'll put it in tomorrow, but the car is running OK for now. I am paying my bills [who said I can't multi-task?]. My bills are paid for the month, though groceries haven't been bought. Later tonight I think I will listen to one of my downloaded books and do some tangling. My Sakura Micron pens are running dry ... one...by...one...they're biting the dust. Need more pens, but need other things first. Like a new printer head for my printer. I need simple directions for how to scan my work, get it in my computer, and resize it so I can post it in my blog (or resize a photo, for that matter). I have a linux OS, if that makes any difference. Can I do this in with Gimp? How? I am barely 'puter literate, so DH won't tell me (again, and again until it sticks). I miss Have Myelin. Hope Sherry is doing well. I miss Zoomdoggies. I think she is doing well. I enj...

Forgetfulness is one more frustrating symptom of MS, and it seems to be taking its toll on  the ole blog. Actually, it's forgetfulness in combination with ON and laziness. Oh, and numb typing fingers. Sorry 'bout that. Way back last Wednesday when I was going to drive to the pharmacy, my car wouldn't start. I've  already told you how I managed to get there and to the hospital the next day for my procedure. But we haven't done anything with the car, until Monday when DH went out and it started right up. He did something something and got a code to look up: malfunctioning TPS (throttle position sensor). We've had this problem before in another car. The TPS costs less than $60 ( ThankYouJesus ), and DH thinks he can install it himself.   I have a cousin coming over tomorrow at 2:30 to help figure out the problem and I don't know if he got the message that he doesn't have to come. [but maybe he should, just in case, but DH might not be fully "awake,...

Ready to continue? Here, uh,  goes nothing... Now, for those out there who are as concerned as I was about the prep which we all have heard about, here is how it went for me THIS time... I took Suprep Bowel Prep solution, one 6 oz. bottle of  clear liquid mixed with cool water to 16 oz.  This was to be followed by two more 16 oz. glasses of water within ONE hour. To avoid any problems due to my very slow mobility, I prepared this in the bathroom like so -- I filled a pitcher (64 oz. plastic juice bottle) with cool filtered water and brought the prep kit into the bathroom; I emptied the solution into the cup and filled it to the top line with water. I put everything where I could reach it from the toilet, then I drank the solution. Much to my dismay, though it was clear it tasted like strongly flavored black cherry kool-aid, very sweet and very salty. I got that down pretty easily with big gulps.  Twenty minutes later I poured and drank another cup of ...

i still  haven't heard from my doc re: the mobility assessment, and I haven't done anything about that this week. that's probably because i have to have a colonoscopy friday; nothing fills your week with dread more than that. unless it is this: i went out to my car wednesday so i could go to the pharmacy to pick up the Suprep stuff (that I have to drink to clear me out), and the car won't start. this is why i was concerned about going to Seattle last week. my car is 24, and not very well. i'm letting it rest until i'm done with the, well, you know. i just finished the first half of the prep. i'm tired, and i wanna go to bed which i will do as soon as i finish this. you know what? i am so tired that i can't type worth a shit right now, so i will post this as a kind of teaser and let you know later how ...it all comes out. Good Night and TTYL

Hey all, I thought it was time to check in just so you all didn't think I have rolled over and died or something. No, I'm still around, I just don't feel like doing much of anything. I have been cold all year, and Summer is no exception. Although the temps look good on the weather report, they sure don't feel like it's Summer hot to me. And I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, given my lack of ability to handle the heat. I did sit outside on the patio for awhile today, and the sun felt so good, but I didn't want to push my luck and stay in it too long. I came in before I wilted, and before it reached the  predicted 78 degrees. (There is NO WAY it did that though, I don't care what they say.) Tomorrow I get to get up at O:butt thirty so I can get on the road to drive to Seattle to visit Diane (of A Stellarlife). I was double checking directions on Google maps, and gee whiz, Seattle has changed since I lived there. There is lots of ro...

I waited until the 5th of July to try once again to figure out what was in my way of getting this w/c I am needing sooner rather than later.  So, I roused myself earlier than I usually do, and called the Physical Therapy Department to reschedule the appointment that Lauren, the roving nurse, had cancelled. The PT clerk who schedules such exams was out that day, so I would have to call her back; I did find out that they do, in fact, only schedule about five "mobility exams" each month, and they really are booked out for a year. How crazy is that? So, my next call was back to my PCP. As I was talking with the front desk clerk, I asked her if my doctor/s (I have two PCPs) did "mobility exams." She said that they did them "all the time," which might have been a slight exaggeration, but got me to shaking my head. So I scheduled an appointment with my PCP, the one I prefer and who is the MD and not the ARNP (not that there's anything wrong with that), and ...

The story continues. I did go to the sleep specialist on the 13th (ho hum) and she told me to turn off all electronics an hour before bedtime, to take a melatonin at 1 AM, and to go to bed at 3 AM. I was to set my alarm for 10 AM and get up right away, putting my feet on the floor. As if... She wants me to change my habit of getting nine+ hours sleep a night to seven. And she want me to work back the clock gradually. (that makes sense) I am to take a Ritalin upon awakening, and again at about 3 PM. Okay, I'll need it. Have I done any of this? A Big Fat NO. Mind and body are balking at the idea; getting no cooperation from either at all. However, my next appointment with her  isn't until July 18, so there's plenty of time to give the new routine a good try. In the meanwhile, I have had my mammogram (which was all OK), but I forgot to schedule the bone density test while I was there so it's on the TO DO list. And I have scheduled, after playing much phone tag, my co...

Carson Daly always introduces me to new-to-me music. I like this one, though I'll admit I haven't listened to it  very closely. It just made me feel younger, you know? Somehow I don't think any of my 56 year old peers stay up and watch late night TV to listen to music or the antics of Jimmy Fallon (who has disappointed me by appearing on the mean-spirited ads that Capital One is famous for. Yuck!)  You go, baby - - throw more of those Cheerios at him!

Oh, I've been meaning to point this out for awhile. Have any of you noticed that my cute little avatar is actually drinking her coffee? Look! See? She lifts the little cup to her mouth, taking sips while reading her little newspaper. This haooened with the Blogger upgrade. That reminds me, I need another cuppa. (And a glass of wine.)

It's funny; no, really, it's not; but it's funny that once I contacted Hoveround and they called me back and I made the appointment to see my PCP to get a "mobility exam" that documents why I need an electric w/c inside my house that once I get in to see my PCP, she tells me she doesn't do "mobility exams" - that the PT department handles those, and  - get this - the waiting list for one is one year long . I can barely manage to get around my small 960 s.f. house using my wheeled walker and now that I start inquiring about my next 'adaptive aid'  I have to wait ONE FUCKING YEAR to be properly assessed?  I am beyond frustrated over this development, as you might imagine.  My PCP did, however, give me a referral for a colonoscopy (oh happy, oh joy), and a tetanus/pertussis booster shot, so I guess it wasn't a  complete waste of my time. So, having been given more time to consider my dilemma I Googled comparisons of the Hoveround with oth...

Finally we're in the midst of Spring, complete with a few 70 degree days. Our pear and apple trees were FULL of blooms that several rain showers did not knock off. Now my hope is that our Orchard Mason Bees did their work and pollinated like the busy little critters are supposed to do. Our rhubarb is growing nicely out back, though I can't get back there to see it. Our lilac tree is doing well enough that DH had to cut back a large branch to let it some light for the rhubarb. The last time I saw the lilac it only produced a few blooms. This one branch filled two large vases with sweetness. Still, I have been out on the patio only once so far, as I am cold all the time. Go figure. I sleep in too late to take advantage of the sun when it's not too warm; I am particularly temperature sensitive this year, it's annoying. I've been looking forward to riding my scooter up to the library when I realised that the switch to turn on the electric garage door opener is just i...

I read this poem on a blog recently, well, it was before Easter, so not that recently, but I can't remember where I read it, so if it was yours, please leave a comment and I will give you props. After doing some Googling I found this version on YouTube. I love the music. What do you think? Be Well, Be Happy,

I heard this first on A Prairie Home Companion, and it's such a cheery tune. Enjoy. Be well,

I imagine that many of you with MS read the NMSS Blog. A few days ago Trevis Gleason dealt with the dreaded B&B issue; not the second B [Bladder] which gets lots of attention. We either pee too often, or not enough, or get UTIs all the time, or wet our bed, or our pads, or ourselves. But the first B [Bowel] is the one that rarely gets talked about, and when it does get talked (or written about in neat little pamphlets explaining the various symptoms of MS that may affect us) it leans toward one end of the spectrum -- constipation. Oh, the dreaded bloating and feeling that you have to take a dump, but you just can't. It doesn't tell you that constipation can be so bad that you need to see a gastroenterologist to find ways to manage it. Like taking doses of various meds, laxatives, eat more fiber, or even using your fingers to pry the stool from you. Oh happy, oh joy. Of course, you know you might be able to go if you just drank enough water to wash things out, but when...