June 25, 2019

My 2nd Miracle & Selamat Hari Raya

Salam Semua, masih dalam bulan Syawal kan,. hope its not too late to wish Selamat Hari Raya & Maaf Zahir Batin semua.. ada berita nak kongsi disini, sebenarnye lepas je publish entry 2019 haritu, masa aku bagitahu yang kami tengah TTC for #2 (1st one lah kirenye with my new husband ni) the next month tu alhamdulillah Allah beri :((
Since berubat dulu2, and after bersalinkan Fahim, masa dah stop breastfeed 1year and a half later tu i gotten my period, and alhamdulillah my cycle very konsisten walaupun long cycle (dlm 50-60days) so lepas kami decide nak usaha betul2 aku beli semula BBT (basal body thermometer) brand Omron yang dulu pernah pakai tu utk track my ovulation. I dont use OPK sebab rasa mcm membazir and kurang accurate. With BBT agak senang nak tgk pattern cycle with charting.

So masa charting after my last period 17/12/2018 lepas, the pattern goes like this:

Ovulated on CD39, temp naik. Masa tu ingat akan period tapi sebab CD50 tu macam rasa similar symptom masa pregnant Fahim dulu, and pelik nape lepas 14dpo tak period lagi. So selamba la test, masa tu just to be sure je. But tak sangka,; the result:
Masa ni cam tercengang jap dekat toilet. Sebab line pekat sangat. Bukan samar2 macam masa TTC Fahim dulu asik la dapat yg samar lepastu gugur...tunjuk husband terus and dia pun terkejut..we hug each other sangat lama sebab macam takcaya lansung..terus panggil Fahim suruh die tengok (walaupun die baru 6yo mana faham) tapi aku just gitau ada 2 line maknenye ada Adik dalam perut ibu. dia pun cam happy YEKEEEE YAYY



So macam biasa lah aku dengan perangai tak caya aku ni, aku pergi beli beberapa lagi hpt and digital punya to be sure lagi.

Alhamdulillah :) 
So next week tu aku ke Avisena Specialist (dulu DEMC Shah Alam) dan berjumpa dengan doc yang sambut Fahim dulu, iaitu Dr Fairuz Ashikin.
Dia ingat aku lagi dan dia pun happy sebab dia kata dia tahu aku ni ada PCOS ape semua dulu and mmg biasa la after 6years tu baru ngandung balik (malas la nak cerita this is my 2nd marriage sebenarnye)
Kalau nak ikotkan, utk 2nd marriage ni i conceived within 1 year, dalam 9 months after nikah.
Rezeki Allah kan kita kadang tak sangka, sebab sebenarnya dah bagitau my hubby ni, I am 35 this year, and bila dah 35 ni memang chances susah, pulak tu dulu masa muda pun nak dapat Fahim susah, hampir giveup, so aku gitau la die harap sabar lah aku faham dia mesti nak ada anak sendiri dengan aku, plus Fahim pulak zikir setiap hari NAK ADEK NAK ADEK NAK ADEK NAK ADEK

Alhamdulillah Allah makbulkan doa Fahim yang nak adik. Kadang2 doa budak kecik yang takde dosa ni kita tak tahu kan..

So masa checkup tu im about 7-8weeks, dah ada heartbeat :)


Now Im about 24weeks pregnant, baby kalini macam lagi besar dari Fahim, agaknye yg ni papa nye besar :P Im huge, nanti lah bebila aku post gambar my bump ni.

Ada sedikit usaha kami lakukan to conceive kalini.

1. MINDSET

I talked with my hubby ni about visualization. Macam mana nak 'visualize' untuk bayangkan sperm dia and my ovum betul2 meet and lekat. Kitorang sama2 tengok video youtube pasal persenyawaan (u can just search at youtube) sebab ada animation2 apa semua. Just tgk sama2 dgn hubby and masa make love imagine lah benda tu huhu.

2. WORKOUT / Exercise

Sangat penting. Kitorang ni sebab memang dah biasa, before ni rajin masuk group2 workout ni. Signup gym pun ada. Tapi aku faham tak semua orang ada masa untuk ni semua. Kalau takde, weekend tu pegi la hiking, panjat2 bukit ke, jogging sama2.. asalkan berpeluh. Sebab bila berpeluh, korang akan keluarkan hormon endorphines (happy hormones) happy hormones ni amatlah penting untuk fertilization berjaya.

3. EAT CLEAN / Stop junks / STOP SMOKING kalau husband merokok

Banyak makan sayur, salad, (kalau taksuke sayur to mmg susah sket aa tapi cuba lah ye telan sayur) supplement mcm Executive B/Iron etc hanya boleh membantu je tapi takleh rely on supplement semata. Husband kurangkan rokok, menuju ke stop terus masa kami conceive haritu. Now alhamdulillah dah stop cuma kadang2 hisap nanostix/vape kalau addicted.

4. BANYAKKAN BERCINTA

Haha taktahulah ni menyumbang ke tak tapi memang betul la..jangan jadikan TTC tu satu keje yg stress, sbenanye korg kena slalu lovey dovey, kena bercinta macam belum kawin tu.

5. IMAGINE DIRI SENDIRI MEMANG DAH PREGNANT DAH

Selalu bayangkan diri (dan yakin) sudah berjaya mengandung. (Teknik ni aku guna juga masa pregnant Fahim dulu) Pernah dengar ayat Fake it Until u Make it.
Ini betul, tapi u HAVE TO BELIEVE IT. bukan bayangkan tapi deep down korang tahu korang memang tak mengandung pun. ni susah sket nak buat, sebab mental mmg kena kuat. Bila selalu bayangkan, ia akan lekat di subconscious kite. Bile ur body believe that u are pregnant, u WILL BE.

Tapi utk new readers, kalau belum check masalah2 berikut; please check dulu

1. Husband's sperm (morphology, motility & quantity kalau xsilap)
2. Ur period cycle (consistent, atau sekejap ada sekejap takde)
3. Uterus Lining and Tubes (sumbat ke tidak)
4. If u have PCOS/Endo/other medical problem
5. Kedudukan Uterus (sebab kalau terbalik, position masa making love juga main peranan)
6. Ada penyakit2 lain

Kalau secara islamic pulak, untuk yang dah cuba more than 2years masih tak berjaya, boleh lah bertanya pada pakar perubatan islam, (bukan bomoh eh) atau makbidan yang amalkan cara tradisional & islamic. Urutan kadang2 membantu untuk melancarkan darah and betulkan kedudukan rahim. Dulu aku conceive memang ada dengan perubatan islam, tapi Tn Haji Mokhtar dah meninggal dunia 2017 (meninggal hari jumaat) taksempat pun jumpa dia mase tu. Banyak jasa die tolong TTCians sbenanye..selain dia memang aku dah taktahu nak suggest siapa. Tapi korang boleh lah ask around kat area korang tu. Sebab kadang2, medical kite takde masalah. Tapi kita ada masalah mistik seperti

1. Saka keturunan
2. Gangguan Jin
3. Hasat dengki orang

Benda ni janganlah tengok dulu yang penting utamakan yg medical dulu. Kalau tak berjaya jugak baru cari kaedah alternative. Kadang ada orang taksub sangat pulak dengan mistik. Tapi tak percaya lansung pun takboleh jugak sebab benda2 ni wujud. Sebab aku sendiri pun lepas 2tahun+ cuba, sudahnya baru tahu dekat dalam rahim ada benda yang menumpang & dah beranak pinak. Sebab tu lah terjadinya PCOS and aku tak period sampai setahun dulu, telur pun smua tak sihat dan busuk. Nak senyawa camne nye. Tapi skang ni PCOS ni terjadi macam2 faktor lah juga. Kalau pemakanan semua tak betul, banyak makan benda acidic, hari2 terhidu asap rokok suami, dan macam2 lah lagi.

Till next entry, assalamualaikum
Ada a few complications on my pregnancy before ni, nanti aku share kan.



January 8, 2019

Assalamualaikum 2019

Hye TTCians if there's anyone still here can you drop a comment?

Taktahu kenapa I suddenly missed my TTC Blog, FindingTwoLines :)
Password pun lupa haritu, nasib baik now dah dapat balik. Bila baca balik my journey dulu2 memang sebak-happy-kelakar-semua ada. Nasib baik rajin ber-blog dulu. Ada la gak tempat nak men-throbek :P

My TTC Baby is now a 6year old kiddo -(soon to be 6yo) Alhamdulillah, he grew up very healthy, rarely gets sick, so smart, funny and very matured.
How time flies kan?

Lots have changed, Major ones actually. Especially that I was separated and divorced with Fahim's father. (in 2017)
Takpayah cerita panjang jodoh sampai situ aje. So the struggle and hardship I was facing, the so-called kekuatan that I gained during TTC - was what I actually need during the crisis, during the separation, during the depressed moment. The pindah-randah process. The shut-down of my company (because I was so broke and needed to downsize, tumpang rumah kawan, for months until I found my (our) new home. Yeah lots of shits happen. But without Fahim, I probably dont have the strength to move forward. :')

I shut down this blog because I was on designing business from 2015 - and when my client googled my name they found this blog ;D Tak kisah pun cuma masalahnye malu la ada cerita pasal sperm count lah make love lah hapelah. Macam tak appropriate lansung untuk dibuat tayangan umum dah blog ni kalau berbisnes - silap jugak pegi guna nama same utk bisnes ahhaha..

So I have to temporary shut down this blog (pastu terus lupa) and I know some of my readers tried to reach me thru FB/Email ; nak tanya my pendapat pasal your TTC Journey. I am so sorry because during that time - was the time I was on major crisis and memang tak berminat lansung nak discuss about TTC anymore. Memang ada few friends suruh biar aje blog ni sebab ramai yang nak cari info utk TTC...I know that tapi mase tu memang rasa taknak publish because my business tgh active and I dont want my private life (nak-nak lagi citer pasal TTC ni bukan semua org faham) so utk jaga nama company I unpublished this blog., tambah pulak dengan masalah masa tu. I even quit TTCGM sebab rasanya dah taknak TTC and cukuplah Fahim seorang.


Tapi Allah tu Maha Bijaksana dan Dialah merancang dan menentukan segalanya. I got married again (last April 2018) and to be frank yeah we immediately want our own baby (he gets along so well with Fahim because he is always Fahim's fav uncle since he was a baby, and alhamdulillah he is really2 a good father to Fahim) tapi Fahim asik mintak adik sebab tak sabar2 nak jadi abang so cam ughhhhhhh why laaaaaaa u now pandai mintak adikkkk Fahim oiiii ibu nak dapat kau pun susah oiii :))
Mase aku TTC dah la struggle nak menjawap soalan Bila nak ada anak.
Sekali Fahim skang boleh tanya aku
"Ibu, bila Fahim nak ada adik?"
:((

So that's why, I came back here. To refresh back wth is TTC, and wth I did last time, sebab aku dah lupaaaa semua research aku sendirikkk hahahhhhh. OMG and I just turned 35 so - nak tunggu mende lagi kau bukan 20an lagi jay. :P

I discovered a lot of us dah beralih ke IG ye. Mind dropping your TTC ig username if you have one?
And so sorry again for those yang pernah email/pm me if I didn't reply a few years ago. :( You have no idea what I went thru. But now I am so much better, Alhamdulillah.

I am back to TTC #2
(well TTC#1 with my new husband) :)

My New Family :)